White Girl Problems (12 page)

I shook my head. “Get your swimsuit on. We’re leaving now.”

She didn’t hesitate. She got up and started rifling through the piles of her ripped clothes and torn keepsakes. I closed the door and she was out in a moment, dressed and ready to go.

We ran down the stairs and out the door. We were getting close again. It had taken her a while to catch up in some ways, but I think the most growth had come from me.

I waved at Aaron, but he jumped out of his truck and ran to me, scooping me up. He nestled his face in my neck. “I’m so sorry, Fin. I had no idea Linna was such a scheming whore.”

I shook my head, patting his brawny shoulder with my flat hand. “It’s cool. Really.” I just didn't want to talk about it.

He put me down on the cement and pulled me back. “I missed you so bad.”

The smile on my face was pasted there. I didn’t know what to say—I hadn’t missed him. I’d had a blast and met someone who made me feel like we were the only people in the world.

His eyes were full of something. “You’re okay, right?”

“Yeah.”

“You seem different.”

A peaceful look floated across my face. “I know. I am different. I’m happy.” He looked hurt, but his happiness had never been my responsibility or my concern. I couldn’t change the fact I’d transformed inside and out.

He gave Jess a nod. “Hey!”

She waved. “Hey.”

He nodded at the truck. “Let’s go.” We climbed in. He kept trying to touch me—resting his hand on mine, brushing his leg against mine, and reaching for things, connecting with me.

I ignored it. I didn’t want to encourage him.

“So your mom is evil, huh?”

“Yeah. She’s lost it. She doesn’t do defeat, not well anyway. She’s hiding in the house.”

He winced. “Yikes, dude. I heard the maid was spying on her and Suzzy. That’s brutal. Who expects their maid is gonna launch a campaign against them?”

I laughed and looked back at Jess. She still looked sick. "The poor woman lost her job."

He whistled as he turned to the right and parked in Carter’s driveway. “I should hope so. That’s seriously bad.”

I stopped listening to them both. My stomach was on fire.

I was returning to the scene of the crime. My mouth was dry and my head was spinning as I climbed out after Jess. She and Aaron talked while I walked to the bright-red rose bushes off to the side of the house. I looked down at the scar still marring my wrist and then at the bushes.

“It was this one over here.”

I looked at Carter, pointing at a huge rose bush with bright-orange roses. I winced. “I’m so sorry for breaking them.”

He shook his head. “You were drugged by your mom and Linna, dude. No one blames you for that night. You got a raw deal.” He walked over and wrapped his huge arms around me, kissing the top of my head. “You look good, chica.”

I smiled into his chest, “Thanks. You look exactly the same.”

He pulled me back. “What? I gained five pounds of beef, baby. Not to mention, I got a tan.”

I winked. “Sexy as ever.” It was creepy how fast I was slipping back into flirty mode. He was a safe person to flirt with though. We joked about things, Snapchatted, and messaged, but it was always in fun.

He nodded. “Come upstairs and I’ll show you where I gained the five pounds.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re a loser.” He picked me up over his shoulder and carried me to the pool. “DON’T DO IT!” I was midair when I screamed it. The water wasn’t even that cold, but it was the shock of being tossed in that made me scream. I came up, grinning and splashing. “DICK!”

He laughed and jumped in. He cannonballed right next to me, sending water shooting at me. I tried to swim away, but he grabbed my leg and pulled me under. I kicked and swam away, laughing and swimming for my life.

He surfaced with a shit-eating grin. “Somebody’s been working out.”

I laughed. “Working my ass off, not working out.”

He cocked an eyebrow. “For real?”

I nodded. “I got sent to my aunt’s and she made me work all summer.”

He whistled. “Dayum. Your dad must have been pissed when he found out the truth.”

I glanced at Jess chatting with Aaron still. “Less pissed than I would have thought.” When I looked back at him, I could see he got my drift. He wagged his eyebrows. “Let me test those muscles for you.”

I laughed and swam to the stairs, but he had my foot and was dragging me back to the deep end before I could even try to get close to escaping. I could see the faces people were making when they looked at me.

Carter flashed me a cute smile. “Where’d the ring come from?”

I looked down at my finger. “An antique shop in Nova Scotia.”

He wrinkled his forehead. “Where?”

“It’s in Canada, just above Boston. Same accent almost. I got it at a shop there.”

He folded his beefy arms. “So not from a guy, then?”

I folded my arms too. “Why?”

“I don’t know. I was just wondering if you happened to meet a dude.”

I winked. “I’ll never tell.”

He laughed. “Oh, I know that about you, Fin.”

We climbed out and he got me some dry clothes, since mine were soaked. He passed me a letter when we were alone in his kitchen. “This came for you by courier today. The guy made me describe you and the incident with the rose bush before I could sign for it for you.”

I took the envelope and opened it.

Finley,

I can’t believe you left and I can’t believe I behaved the way I did. I’m sorry, and I know words won’t make up for the way I acted. I was a jerk. Millie had literally just told me about her illness when you knocked on the door. I didn't know what to say or do. I was devastated. I am so sorry.

When Hattie brought your journal I was crushed because I had assumed the worst. I was an idiot. I thought I had foolishly put myself out there and you had rejected me. When I saw the ring, I can’t tell you how happy I was about it. Seeing it on your finger makes me feel like the whole country between us is nothing but hallway.

I have something I really, desperately want to tell you. I’ll be there shortly. It has to be face to face, but I can’t leave while Millie is this sick. She sends her love by the by.

As does Jack.

As do I.

Yours,

A

I ran my fingers over the writing. He always pressed so hard.

“So the guy, what’s his name?”

I looked up at Carter. “Why would he bring it here?”

“Courier said he couldn’t take it to your house in case your stepmother burned it.”

I nodded. “That’s legit. She would.”

“Name of dude?”

I looked down at the letter again. “Aiden. Aiden Sorenson. He’s English. I think he’s older than us, not sure though.”

Carter gave me a puzzled look. “He writes you real letters?”

I beamed back, like a complete moron. “He does.”

He rolled his eyes. “He’s gay. You chicks are so bad with gaydar.”

“He is not.”

Carter passed me a beer from the fridge and walked out to the patio. “He so is.” I looked down at the beer, taking a sip. It made my stomach tingle instantly, like I was making a poor choice. But I couldn’t be scared of liquor for the rest of my life, and besides, I’d been drinking those Tom Collinses with the bridge brigade and never had an issue. I took a huge swig and followed him out. He sat down next to Aaron and Jess and a girl name Jasmine I used to think of as a close friend. Carter announced loudly, “Fin’s in love with a gay dude.”

My mouth hung open. Jessica shook her head. “I’ve seen him. He’s not gay. He’s sweet.”

Aaron’s cheeks were burning and his eyes had something lingering in there I didn’t want to see. Carter slapped me on the leg. “He writes her letters, by hand.”

Aaron held up his drink. “You had me worried someone else was gonna get to that prize of dating you before one of us, but yeah, he’s gay.”

I drank my beer, feeling my cheeks burning. But Jasmine laughed. “How do you know he hasn’t already?”

Carter and Aaron both looked at me. I laughed and shook my head. “We are never having this convo, so stop.”

Jasmine laughed harder. I winked at her. Jess laughed, but I could see she was unsure about laughing about something so private.

I looked around at the party starting. It was so like the last time I was there, minus Linna though. Girls in bathing suits, twerking like they came on a wrecking ball, like the music video, only they were grinding against each other also.

They were the same, but I was different. I could see Jess was too. She seemed outraged once the dancing started. She gave me a look. “Can we go?”

I nodded and went on the hunt for Carter. I found him in the kitchen, telling stories about football camp.

“I’m outta here. I need to go deal with shit.”

He nodded. “See ya tomorrow maybe?”

“Yeah. Thanks for the letter.”

His charming smile claimed his face. “Anytime. I got no prob hooking up a gay dude with the girl I want.”

I shoved him. “You’re an idiot.”

I turned and left, stumbling upon Aaron dancing with a girl and running his hands up and down her ass. His hands lifted immediately. I shook my head. “I’ll text you tomorrow, okay?”

He gave me the thumbs-up, but I could tell he was upset. I didn’t know why he thought it was so certain we would hook up. He’d hooked up with Linna. Ho code eliminated him from my options at the dude buffet. There was no way I was dating a guy who had dated my BFF. Even if she was a Mean Girls version of a BFF.

Jessica and I wandered down the road. She wrapped her arms around herself. “Aaron likes you.”

“Yeah. Well, he dated Linna so that’s not really an option.”

“I wonder where she is?”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. I’m curious too. She totes owes me a major explanation—major.” Jessica nodded, but she looked lost. In the streetlight, I noticed a funny look on her face. “You okay?”

She shrugged. “Can you twerk?”

I laughed. “Yeah, but you gotta practice. Everybody acts like it’s their first time, but all those bitches are practicing.”

“For real?”

“Yup.”

She popped her butt a bit. I laughed harder. “You got typical white-girl ass. You gotta work twice as hard as curvy girls.” I popped it for her.

“That was pretty good.”

I felt a bit sad when I said, “Linna and I practiced a lot.” I realized how hurt I was then and there. She had stabbed me in the back for a dude. A dude I didn’t even want.

I turned toward her house and headed that way. “I’ll meet you at the house.”

“No way am I walking home alone.”

I gave her a look. “Be prepared to see a cat fight.”

She rolled her eyes. We both knew what a wuss I really was.

When white girls throw down, they pull hair, tear leggings, and throw pumpkin spiced lattes.

Chapter Nine

Catfight and a Broken Heart

September

My phone buzzed with the notification from Starbucks that the pumpkin spiced lattes were back. September first had hit and I still hadn’t seen Linna. She hadn’t been home any of the dozen times I’d stopped by. Her parents had no idea where she was. I had assumed it meant they were covering for her.

Skeezy ho was avoiding the scrap we both knew was coming. I was gonna tear out her weave, all Jerry Springer style. Well, that's how it was playing out in my head. In reality, it would probably be me shouting at her and then both of us crying like babies.

I lay on my bed, staring at the stars my dad had put there when I was little. Half had fallen down, but they still made me smile.

One of them started moving. I blinked, but it was still moving. “Oh God, she’s drugged me again.” I remembered when Sheila threatened to poison my food with narcotics. I was seeing a moving star on my ceiling… That had to be the first sign. Damn, and there I’d been thinking we had been doing so well. She hadn’t left her room to face me and Jess yet. It had been bliss.

I sat up, but through the window I could see where the light was coming from. I sighed and got up, stumbling. I opened the window. “Aaron, not funny.”

“Aaron?” A British voice answered back.

I froze, leaning out. “Aiden?” Was I high or was he there?

“Would you prefer it were Aaron?”

I smiled. ”You have seriously low self-esteem for such a hot guy.”

He chuckled. “You coming down, then, or shall I come up?”

“If you climb up, I expect the whole ‘But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun,’ but you have to say Finley, not Juliet, because then you’ll see my low self-esteem.”

He laughed and I reveled in it. Watching him laugh was bliss. He shook his head, “Well, since I not only have an English accent but also know Romeo and Juliet from start to finish, are you certain that is the scene you would like spouted as a declaration of my most ardent infatuation with you? I feel I would be considerably theatrical with the performance.”

I sighed and leaned on the railing. “Everything you say is like Shakespeare.”

“I wish that were true.” His smile faded, and I suddenly had a bad feeling about his being free to come to see me. I turned and ran from the room, hurrying down the stairs and out the front door “Millie?”

He nodded, looking down. “I’m afraid she has passed.”

My lower lip popped out. “She has? So Jack is all alone?”

He smiled. “Of course not. It would not be much like Jack to linger without her. He passed the morning after. I have no doubt he had an arrangement worked out with someone.”

I ran to him, wrapping my arms around him. “I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head. “Jack was nothing without Millie. They are together. I cannot be sad about that.” He sounded sad, incredibly sad. I was too. My heart hurt for him and for Jack and Millie. I wasn't sure I believed in an afterlife so there was a distinct possibility they were just gone, separated from one another forever. The thought made me grip Aiden firmer.

“You have to know, when you came with your sister—”

I shook my head. “I got your note. I’m so sorry I got mad. I acted like a dick. You just are so built up in my head.”

“As you are in mine.” He kissed the top of my head, pausing there.