When Only Cupcakes Will Do (23 page)

Alex stood before her looking uncomfortable, unsure whether to sit down in Kate's vacated seat or bolt for the door. He set the tray down on the table and faced her squarely.

‘I'm sorry, Lucie. I had no idea you would be here, but I remember now that your mum lived around here before she emigrated, didn't she?'

‘Yes, it's just Jess and the boys there now. The house is right across the road.'

‘Are you a friend of Jem's? Harry didn't mention that he was planning on joining up with the hen party. It was a spur of the moment thing, I think.'

Alex was staring at her. She found the courage to raise her eyes from inspecting her fingernails and look him in the eye. His face was as familiar as her own, every blemish and tiny scar so memorable that she had to crush down a surge of nausea at seeing him after three long months. Somehow she had expected that the next time she saw him he'd look different, changed in some way; that, as his feelings for her had changed, so would his physical features, his demeanour, the effect he had on her.

But nothing had changed. He was exactly the same Alex who had stolen her heart over their mutual selection of a silver Tiffany heart necklace for their mothers' birthdays. Did the stab of pleasure at seeing him standing before her mean she still loved him?

‘Lucie, I've wanted to call you, to explain, but well, I never seem to have found the right moment, couldn't formulate the right words to justify my reaction that night when you… well, you…'

‘Alex, honestly, you don't have to say anything…'

‘No, I want to. Actually, would you mind excusing me for a moment while I deliver these drinks to Harry? Do you think you could spare a few minutes? Could we have a chat, over there, in private, away from the… erm… hens?'

‘Alex…'

‘Please, Lucie. I owe you an explanation.'

She raked her eyes over his face, taking in the earnestness, the genuine hope that she would agree to his request. What she saw brought the images that had floated around her dreams, albeit less sharp and intense recently, screaming back to her. Could she take the chance of being hurt once again?

Yet wasn't this what she had wanted? An opportunity to hear his side of the story? To understand at last why he had rejected her proposal? She needed to hear his defence of his surprising behaviour in order to come to terms with it.

‘Okay.'

She gathered her cardigan and handbag and moved to a table at the back of the bar, the crowd having thinned as eleven o'clock approached. She sunk down onto a stool, her mouth dry, her throat tight, but she had no intention of touching her wine. It was important she keep her mind clear so she could remember every word Alex was about to utter and respond without the unreliability indulging in alcohol could cause.

‘It's good to see you.' Alex grabbed a stool and sat opposite her, sipping the froth from the top of his pint and watching her intently.

‘You too.' It was the truth. She couldn't deny the way her body had reacted when she'd seen him across the bar. His polished, golden good looks still caused her heart to flutter.

‘I'm sorry, Lucie. I should have handled the situation better. But in my defence it was a genuine shock to see you at Tiffany's and when you went down on one knee with that signet ring, well I panicked. I couldn't believe what was happening. Then when I realised, I'm ashamed to admit I was terrified. It wasn't that I did
want
to get engaged, it was that I hadn't even thought that far ahead. It had never occurred to me that you were thinking about getting married, the whole settling down thing.'

‘It's okay, Alex. I realise now that I should have said something, sounded you out first…'

‘All that was on my mind was achieving my partnership at Carter & Mayhew. Did you hear, by the way? I was confirmed as an equity partner at the board meeting last month. I did it, Lucie – before I turn thirty – which I'm sure I don't have to remind you is in three weeks' time.'

‘Congratulations. I know how hard you've worked for it. I'm happy you eventually got the recognition you deserve.'

Lucie saw the pleasure written clearly on his face and her heart ballooned. Could their separation have been her fault for rushing into something Alex clearly wasn't ready for? If she had waited, bided her time like Steph and Sofia had advised, would he have proposed to her once his partnership had been confirmed and he felt he'd achieved his professional goal and was able to turn his attention to a personal one?

‘Did you know Yolande is pregnant?'

‘Yes, I saw the announcement on Facebook.'

‘Greg is jubilant, there's no other word to describe it. He's already bought everything for the nursery and he's talking about names and schools. They're even contemplating moving out to the country and Greg will commute. He's the most excited I've seen him – even more so than after we pulled an all-nighter to secure that takeover bid last November.'

‘Alex…'

‘And Harry's getting married in two weeks' time. Josh has just announced his engagement in
The Times
, no less! Hey, will you be at the wedding?'

‘No. I don't know Jemima that well. It's her sister Kate who introduced us and Kate is Jess's friend. Alex, I …'

‘You know, I've been thinking a lot about us these last few weeks. I miss you, Lucie. I miss your quirks, your chatter, your funny obsession with gastronomic alchemy. I'm sorry we broke up. Do you think… would it be possible for us to give it another go? What do you say?'

‘Oh, Alex, I've missed you too. But I'm not sure…'

‘Please, Lucie, I want you to forgive me for turning you down. I am truly sorry, believe me. After all the organisation that went into springing that surprise at Tiffany's you must have been devastated, I realise that now.' Alex leaned across the table and grasped both her hands in his. He stared into her eyes, smiling broadly. ‘I never stopped loving you, Lucie. I didn't understand what had happened, what I'd lost, until after the partnership announcement and I had the time to stop and think about it. I made the biggest mistake of my life. How could I have given up the chance to be with someone as wonderful as you? Life without you in it is dull and grey and boring. The sparkle that I took for granted disappeared when we broke up. Please say you'll give me another chance.'

Lucie's spirits lifted as she listened to the speech of contrition she had never expected to hear. Could she really be hearing these words, the words she had longed to hear three months ago?

But then her emotions crashed back down to earth. She was a totally different person now to the one that had left Tiffany's devastated by his rejection. She had left her job; okay, she'd had no choice, but she'd taken the chance to shoot for her dreams and now she had a fledgling business to nurture and expand. She was proud of what she'd achieved and she had matured as a person too – as a responsible business entrepreneur. She had even learned how to zip-wire! Was reconciling with Alex truly what she wanted? But Alex was still talking.

‘Will you be my plus one for Harry and Jemima's wedding?'

‘Really? Are you serious?'

‘Absolutely. If we're going to give our relationship another chance, there's no time like the present. Neither of us is getting any younger!'

Lucie felt him squeeze her hand and her thoughts cascaded through all the future possibilities that had been liberated from their tightly sealed box. Could she return to her old life in London and dust off her dreams of marrying Alex? Would she move back in with Alex in his pristine flat in Pimlico? She wasn't sure of the answers – she needed time to consider her feelings.

And there was another factor to throw into the mix. Ed.

‘Thanks, Alex. I'll think about it.'

‘I'd better get back to the lads or they'll be thinking I'm missing-in-action. I'm so please we got this chance to talk. I mean it this time, Lucie. I'm ready to make a serious commitment.'

Alex stood up, holding her gaze, still grasping her hand in his so she had to stand too. He leaned across the table to kiss her and, before their lips met, she caught a movement at the periphery of her vision. She turned her head so that Alex's kiss landed on her cheek just in time to see Ed frozen in mid-stride in the doorway taking in the scene. He met her eyes and raised his eyebrows into his fringe in puzzlement. Then he glanced at her companion. Clearly he had put two and two together and Lucie saw the realisation seep into his expression. He retreated from the pub, but not before she glimpsed the reflection in his dark eyes.

A splice of guilt shot through her chest and the urge to run after him was too strong to deny.

‘Ed, wait!'

Chapter Twenty-Six

‘I take it that was Alex?'

‘Yes, but…'

‘Well, don't let me interrupt your little reunion.'

‘It's not a reunion. I had no idea Alex was going to be there. He's part of Harry's stag party. We just bumped into each other.'

‘I saw the way he was looking at you, Lucie. What were you talking about?'

The intensity of Ed's challenge surprised her, but as she opened her mouth to explain, another realisation dawned. She had left Alex at the table in the pub to run after Ed. What did that mean? She didn't have to think too long to come up with that answer. She knew why. But Alex was still a loose end in her life. Those feelings she had experienced when she was with him were real. What if she did still love him? She needed to talk to him further, ask him to expand on his explanation for rejecting her so she could put the whole traumatic episode behind her and move on with a clear mind, without all the familiar questions continually circulating in her mind. She needed closure with Alex otherwise she'd never be able to give her heart, her whole heart, to anyone.

Ed had been studying her face as these conclusions had dawned. He'd taken her silence as reluctance to discuss her meeting with Alex.

‘You might not believe me, Lucie, but Rosa told me I would find you here tonight. She knew Jemima and Kate had asked everyone to go for a drink after the party. I was hoping to find you here and confess how much you've changed my life these last few months with your own brand of mayhem. I love the way you throw yourself into every project with passion and abandon and don't care whether it succeeds or fails, just enjoying the satisfaction of knowing that you've given it your all. I love how you've taken the nightmare of being fired and turned it into a fabulous mobile cake business. I just know that, with you at the helm, the Travelling Cupcake Company will be a triumph.'

Ed's eyes did not flicker from hers. It was the most serious she had ever seen him.

‘This is what you can achieve by trusting in your passion, your creativity; by believing that what your heart tells you is right. You should never settle for the easy option of stability and order, whether in business or romance, or you'll never be truly happy. Let your heart soar, Lucie, and you'll taste what real love is about.'

‘Ed, I need to…'

‘If you know anything about me, Lucie, you should know that I'm not the kind of guy who hangs around waiting. Life has taught me that there's too much out there to explore, to experience, to enjoy. If you need more time to realise how much you've changed since leaving Francesca's, then you're not the Lucie Bradshaw I thought I lo… knew. I thought you were ready to give your heart a chance for once. I was clearly mistaken.'

And Ed turned his back and strode out of her life.

‘Lucie? Is everything okay?'

Alex had appeared at her side, squinting into the distance as a silver Alfa Romeo revved its engine and screeched around the corner, the red tail lights flashing as the breaks were applied at the last minute.

Lucie could almost taste Ed's anger. Everything he'd said to her was right. She had lived her life craving stability. After watching her parents, and then Jess, go through the pain of broken relationships, all she had wanted was for her life to be settled and steady and the people in it consistent and calm. When she'd met Alex he was all of these things and that was why she'd thought she loved him. There were no dramas, no heated discussions, no fireworks.

‘Everything's fine thanks, Alex.'

‘Hey, Alex, where've you been?' shouted Harry, rolling towards them, a pint of Guinness grasped in his hand, which he emptied in one gulp. ‘Come on, we're moving on to the next watering hole. Say goodbye to your girlfriend!'

‘Sorry, Lucie. I have to go, but will you call me? Let me know about the wedding invitation? It'll be a great opportunity for us to spend some time together and chat about our future.'

‘Okay, I'll call you.'

‘Great.' Alex leaned in to embrace her, but she swiftly averted her head so he deposited his kiss somewhere around her right ear, a whisper of his breath tickling her lobe. She wasn't surprised that the gesture didn't register on her Richter scale of passion.

Could she have been wrong all this time? Was Ed right when he said that true love wasn't about safety, security and commitment but about uncontrollable attraction, passionate connections and undeniable sexual chemistry.

Just thinking of these things and the person who had fired the emotions within her veins sent a tingle of desire through her body.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

‘So, are you seriously thinking of getting back together with Alex?' asked Jess as they munched on a plate of muesli flapjacks at her kitchen table. The door out to the garden was open and they could hear Lewis and Jack singing tunelessly to a Disney soundtrack as they scrubbed the wheels of the ice-cream van for extra pocket money.

Lucie had been so overwhelmed with what had happened over the last twenty-four hours that tears had gathered along her lower lashes when once again had Jess expressed her gratitude for her tumbling back into their lives and adding a sparkle. Everything in Jess's family garden was rosy; the boys were happy, she loved being part of the Travelling Cupcake Company and planned to keep it ticking over if Lucie decided to go to Spain, and her date with Matt had been a great success. So why had her sister been so muted in her reaction when she had told her about bumping into Alex?