When Love Is Enough (13 page)

She met his gaze, but there wasn’t a smile on her face.

He turned his attention to the sailors making final preparations for their departure. "Do you anticipate any problems sailing into Rouen?" he asked.

"No," Captain Faraday answered, "there should be no trouble. The
Silver Star
is loaded with goods bound for Paris. Once we dock, I’ll return as quickly as I can."

"How long will we have?"

"I should be able to return within a week. If it takes longer than that to accomplish your mission, I’ll return to England for another cargo and be back as quickly as possible. We’ll work out the details before we reach Rouen so my crew and I can be of as much assistance as possible."

"That would be greatly appreciated," Gabriel said. "I have friends who should be waiting for us when we reach Rouen. They’ll take us to Paris. Hopefully, we’ll be able to accomplish our mission in under a week and be back to Rouen when you arrive."

Faraday smiled. "Then we should be safely back on English shores in no time."

"I hope so," he answered, knowing the chances of that happening were questionable, but refusing to say as much.

"Are you ready?" The captain cast a glance from Lydia to Gabriel, and finally to Etherington.

Gabriel nodded, then watched as Lydia stepped into Harrison’s arms.

"We’ll bring Austin home," she whispered. "Don’t worry."

"I know." Harrison held Lydia a second or two longer, then released her. "Take care of her, Gabe. And yourself."

"I will. I’ll bring them all back."

Etherington nodded then left.

Lydia and Gabriel followed Captain Faraday up the gangplank and stood at the railing while the
Silver Star
set sail.

He stood silently behind her and watched until Harrison’s outline was no longer visible. Before she turned, she swiped her gloved fingers across her cheeks.

"I’m not crying," she announced.

"I know. It’s the salt air. It has that effect on a person."

He couldn’t help himself. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and held her close to him. She didn’t pull away from him, whether she assumed his actions were part of his role as her husband, or if she allowed him to hold her because she was frightened and needed to be held – by anyone.

For several long moments she stayed in his arms, then she slowly turned and stepped closer.

His body warmed with a soaring heat, and his heart thundered in his chest. He should stop her. He should, but...

He cradled her in his arms until a voice echoed from behind.

"Baron Talbot? Lady Talbot? Are you ready to go below?"

Gabriel turned to find the ship’s steward behind him. It took him a moment to realize how superbly they were already playing their roles. From the look of surprise on Lydia’s face, she realized the same.

"Yes. My wife and I would like to get settled."

He steadied himself on his cane and held out his arm. "Are you ready, my dear?"

She placed her small, trembling hand on his sleeve and they took their first step toward their cabin.

They followed the steward as he led them through a hatch and down the narrow stairs. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her lift her gaze to look at him. He didn’t look down. Couldn’t. Knew if he did, he’d realize how vulnerable she was, and he’d lose what little resolve he had left. Allowing her to go with him was such a risk.

It was all he could do to keep himself from leading her back up on deck and ordering the captain to turn the ship around and take her back where she’d be safe.

___

They ate their evening meal with Captain Faraday in his cabin, then went above deck. They watched until the orange glow of the sun slid low on the horizon, then Lydia walked with him down the narrow corridor to their cabin. When they arrived, he lifted the latch on the door and stepped aside for her to enter.

Hannah was inside turning down the bed. "The captain sent a tray," she said. "He thought you might like some tea before you retired."

"How nice of him."

She removed her bonnet and cloak and Hannah hung them in a small, narrow clothes chest against the far wall.

"Will there be anything else?" Hannah asked.

"No. I’ll call when I need you."

"Very well. I’ll be right next door."

The door closed behind Hannah with an ominous click.

She was alone with him.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

His voice didn’t startle her, but settled over her like the heat from a warm fire on a chilly night. After all, she’d heard that voice in her dreams more nights than she hadn’t.

"Yes, I’m fine."

She gathered her resolve, then turned to face him.

Her heart flipped in her breast. Oh, why did he have to be so unbearably handsome? Why couldn’t he be ugly, or overbearing, or ill-mannered? Why did he have to be one of the most attractive men – both on the outside and the inside – she’d ever met? Why had he held her? Why had he kissed her? Why had he shown her what it would be like to be loved by him again?

She tried to bring Culbertson’s face to the forefront. Tried to remember what it was like when he held her. But heaven help her. It wasn’t anything like when Gabriel held her or kissed her.

She could never let anything like that happen again. If it did, she wouldn’t be strong enough not to give in to him.

He walked across the room and sat on a hard chair next to a small table against the wall. "Please, sit, Liddy."

She sat, then watched as he rubbed his leg. "Are you in much pain?"

He smiled. "Enough. It’s a great deal more difficult to keep one’s balance on the deck of a rolling ship than on solid ground."

"I hadn’t thought of that. Is there anything I can do?"

"No. I just need to rub the muscles. It keeps them from cramping."

He continued to rub his leg as the heavy footsteps of the crewmen made their way down the hallway outside. "I could use a cup of tea though, if you don’t mind."

"Of course."

She poured him a cup of tea with sugar like he preferred, then the same for herself. When she finished she sat across the table from him. "When do you think we’ll arrive in Paris?"

"Before nightfall, Tuesday."

She nodded and sipped her tea. The air outside was chilly and the hot liquid felt good going down. She closed her eyes on a sigh, and when she opened them, her gaze met his. There was a frown on his face and she felt a sudden trepidation.

"I want you to listen closely, Liddy, because you need to understand exactly what we’re going to do."

She nodded, but the last swallow of tea lodged in her throat like a thick lump of cotton.

"Captain Faraday doesn’t anticipate anything unforeseen happening when we dock in Rouen, and neither do I. But I don’t doubt the docks will be crowded with French soldiers, so we’ll have to draw as little attention as possible."

She listened closely to what he said, and nodded once or twice to indicate she understood.

"I sent a message to my friends before we left England, telling them approximately when we’d arrive. If they received the message in time, they’ll be waiting for us. If they didn’t, we’ll have to find our own transportation."

"If they aren’t there, do you know where to go?"

He moved his hand lower and rubbed a spot below his knee. "Yes, but I hope we don’t have to use a public conveyance. I prefer not to involve a driver who can recall where he delivered two English newlyweds if he’s questioned."

He sat back and unbuttoned his jacket, then stretched his legs out in front of him. She tried not to notice his muscular legs, or his flat, taut stomach, but her eyes continually moved to places where she shouldn’t want to focus.

"Captain Faraday assures me he’ll return in one week."

"Can you get Austin free in that length of time?"

"If we find out for sure where he’s being held."

"If you don’t?"

"Then it will take a little longer, that’s all. But we’ll free him. I promise you that."

She tried to keep the worry from her face but knew she’d failed. He reached for her hand and held it.

"I want you to listen carefully. This is important. We have exactly one week to get to Rouen, find Austin, and return before noon the following Monday. Captain Faraday can safely wait two or three days without drawing suspicion, but if we haven’t returned by then, he’ll have no choice but to set sail without us."

Her heart raced steadily in her chest, but she wouldn’t allow herself to consider the worst. Gabriel had everything planned out to the last detail. She’d simply have to trust him. "Then what will we do?"

"We’ll have to wait another week. The captain will pick up a new cargo and return the following Monday. He’ll wait for us again until Wednesday or Thursday noon, then leave again if we’re not there. He assured me he’ll repeat his schedule every week until we’ve boarded."

She nodded, trying to show him she wasn’t worried. She doubted it worked.

"If all goes well, we’ll have three days to find Austin, free him, then return to Rouen by the following Monday."

"And if it doesn’t?"

He lifted his hand from hers and rubbed his leg. "We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it."

"Are you sure your friends won’t mind becoming involved in your plan?"

He smiled and her heart stuttered. His smile still affected her like it used to.

"They won’t mind. They’re loyal British subjects doing important jobs in France."

"They’re taking a huge risk for us."

"It’s a risk they’re glad to take."

He started to say something else, then paused while more footsteps echoed outside their cabin door.

Traffic had lessened and she assumed the decreased activity meant most of the sailors had retired for the night. Which meant it wouldn’t be long before the major could go to his own room without being noticed.

She clasped her hands tightly in her lap then asked the question weighing heaviest on her mind. "Do you think he’s all right?"

For a long moment he didn’t answer, but rubbed his leg as if he could knead his doubts away with his pain. Finally, he took a deep breath and looked into her eyes. "I don’t know. I pray he is."

"So do I." She fought to hold back the tears.

Gabriel slid his chair back from the small table and turned toward her. "There’s one more thing." He locked his gaze with hers. "And this is very important."

She waited.

"If for some reason something goes wrong and Austin and I don’t return in time, I want your promise that you’ll return to Rouen to be on board when the
Silver Star
sails for England."

"No."

"Yes. I need your word, Liddy."

She placed a stalwart expression on her face. "I won’t leave you and Austin."

"You will, or you won’t leave this ship. I’ll lock you in this cabin and Captain Faraday will post an army of guards outside your door to keep you locked inside."

"You can’t do that. You need me to—"

"I need to know that you’re safe." He raked his fingers through his hair. "If something happens to me, Jean-Paul will make sure you get back to the
Silver Star
. Promise me you’ll do exactly as he asks. That you’ll be brave enough to leave us behind."

She fought the anger building inside her – the fear. "You don’t know what you’re asking."

"I do. More than you know. But I’ll not risk your safety."

His shoulders stiffened and he seemed more resolved than before. "Your promise, Liddy."

She clenched her teeth and glared at him, making it plain how much she disliked his demand. He gave no quarter, but kept his gaze level with hers.

"Your promise, or you’ll not leave the ship."

She finally relented. "You have my promise. I’ll leave you behind when I’m certain you aren’t returning."

"Thank you."

His cane sounded with each step he took toward to the door that connected her room with his. "Rest well," he said, then closed the door behind him.

Oh, how she wanted to take back her promise. How she wanted to tell him she’d never leave him.

She sat alone until the room turned dark. Hannah came in without being called and helped her get ready for bed.

For hours she lay in the darkness, telling herself it wouldn’t come to that. That she wouldn’t have to leave them behind.

Because if she did, it would mean that Austin was dead, and this time she’d lost Gabe forever.

Lydia stood alone in the center of the small cabin and waited. They’d arrived in Rouen less than an hour ago, and it was time to play her role. For her, this was the most dangerous part of the plan, the only reason she’d been allowed to accompany Gabriel – to play the role of the newly married Baroness Talbot.

This was the role that at one time she’d thought would be a lifelong role – that of Gabriel Talbot’s wife. This was the future she’d envisioned for herself - the only future she’d ever imagined she would have – would want. Until he so bluntly told her it wasn’t her heart he wanted, but the wealth he assumed would come with her when they married.

He’d broken her heart that day and she couldn’t let herself forget how easily she’d fallen for his lies. She couldn’t fall for his charms again. She doubted she’d survive if she were foolish enough to give him the power to hurt her again.

She intended to marry the Marquess of Culbertson. Her father had signed the papers agreeing to the match. She was going to be a future duchess – not because she’d chosen that role. But because that was the role assigned her. The role Gabriel Talbot had forced her into. Because he hadn’t wanted her. Except...

I don’t regret kissing you.

Well, she’d learned her lesson. She wouldn’t risk her heart like she’d done before. They might have to spend the next few days pretending to be husband and wife, but it wouldn’t be anything more. The intensity with which he’d kissed her was proof enough of how dangerous it was to be around him. She’d guard herself every step of the way or the outcome would be disastrous.

She erased any softness she felt and listened to his footsteps, the uneven gate of his walk, the muffled drop of his cane hitting just before he took another step - all the sounds she associated with him.