What to Expect the First Year (52 page)
Read What to Expect the First Year Online
Authors: Heidi Murkoff
Most babies love musicâbut that doesn't mean you should pump up the volume, especially when you're in an enclosed area, like the car. A baby may cry when music (or another noise) is too loud, but don't rely on your little one's complaints to tell you when to turn down the sound. A baby's ears, in fact, don't have to be “bothered” to be harmed.
According to the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health, more than 15 minutes of exposure to 100 decibels is unsafe for an adult. And noise that is hazardous to an adult is even more dangerous to a baby because of the thinner skull and smaller ear canal, which makes the sound pressure entering the ear greater. In fact, an infant might perceive a sound as 20 decibels louder than an adult or older child does, making a toy that emits 90 decibels of sound seem more like 110 decibels to your little one's tender earsâequal to the noise of a power mower, chain saw, or subway train. The bottom line on sound: It's too loud if you can't talk easily over it. Turn it down, or take your baby to a quieter place quickly.
Even white noise machines that are meant to soothe baby with background sounds can be harmful to tiny ears if they're played too loud or positioned too close. To play it safe, place any white noise far from baby's crib, and set volume to low.
Babies look pretty fragile, but they're actually pretty sturdy. They don't “break” when you pick them up, their heads don't snap when you forget to support them, and they weather most minor falls without major injury.
Still, babies can be vulnerable, and in ways that parents wouldn't necessarily think. Even a newborn seemingly too tiny to get into trouble sometimes doesârolling off a changing table or a bed long before he or she is mobile. To protect your baby from injuries that don't have to happen, be sure to follow all of these safety tips all of the time:
⢠In the car, always buckle your baby into a rear-facing infant car seat no matter how far you're going or how fast or slow you'll be drivingâand no matter how much baby is crying. Wear a seat belt yourself, and make sure whoever's doing the driving does, tooâno one's safe unless the driver is. And never drink and drive (or drive when you're very tired or taking medication that makes you sleepy), text while driving, or talk on a phone that's not hands-free while driving, or let baby ride with anyone who does. (
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for more on car seat safety.)
⢠Always keep one hand on baby at bath time while you suds and rinse with the other. If you bathe baby in a large tub, put a small towel or cloth at the bottom to prevent slipping.
⢠Never leave your baby unattended on a changing table, bed, chair, or couchânot for a second. Even a newborn who can't roll over can suddenly extend his or her body and fall off. If you don't have safety straps on your changing table, you should always keep one hand on your baby.
⢠Never put baby in an infant (or car) seat or carrier on a table, counter, dryer, or any other elevated surface, or leave baby unattended in a seat on any surface, even the middle of a soft bed or sofa (where suffocation is a risk should baby tip over).
⢠Never leave a baby alone with a pet, even a very well-behaved one.
⢠Never leave baby alone in a room with a sibling who is under 5 years old. A game of peekaboo affectionately played by a preschooler could result in tragic suffocation for an infant. A loving but overly enthusiastic bear hug could crack a rib.
⢠Don't leave baby alone with a sitter who is younger than 14, or one you don't know well or whose references you haven't checked. All sitters should be trained in infant safety and CPR (and so should all family members who might be caring for your baby, you included).
⢠Never jiggle or shake your baby vigorously (even in play) or throw him or her up into the air.
⢠Never leave baby alone at home, even while you go for the mail, move the car, or check the laundry in the apartment building basement. It takes only seconds for an accident to happen.
⢠Never leave a baby or child alone in a vehicle, not even for a moment. In hot (or even mild) weather, even keeping the windows down might not prevent the baby from succumbing to heatstroke. During winter months, snow can block a car's exhaust pipe, and warming up a car can cause carbon monoxide to back up into the car. A baby left alone in a car during cold weather is also at risk of hypothermia. In any weather, a baby left unattended can be quickly snatched.
⢠Never take your eyes off your baby when you're shopping, going for a walk, or sitting at the playground. A baby in a stroller or shopping cart makes an easy target for abduction.
⢠Remove any strings, cords, or ribbons longer than 6 inches from gowns, hoodies, and other baby clothing.
⢠Avoid using any kind of chain or string on baby or on any of baby's toys or belongingsâthat means no necklaces, no strings for pacifiers or rattles, no religious medals on chains, and no ribbons longer than 6 inches on cribs or cradles, or anywhere else for that matter. Be sure, too, that baby's crib, play yard, and changing table are not within reach of electrical cords (which present double danger), cords from phones or chargers, or venetian blind or drapery cords. All of these items can cause accidental strangulation.
⢠Don't place filmy plastics, such as dry-cleaner bags or other plastic bags, on mattresses, the floor, or anywhere baby can get at them.
⢠Never leave an unattended infant within reach of pillows, stuffed toys, or plush items, or let baby sleep on a sheepskin, plush-top mattress, beanbag, waterbed, or a bed wedged against the wall. Always remove bibs and any hair ties or barrettes before putting baby down to sleep.
⢠Consider keeping a fan on in baby's room during sleep. Research suggests that the circulating air may reduce the risk of SIDS.
⢠Remove crib gyms and mobiles once baby can get up on hands and knees (around 4 to 6 months).
⢠Do not place baby on any surface next to an unguarded window, even for a second, and even when baby's asleep.
⢠Use smoke detectors and carbon monoxide detectors in your home, and install them according to fire department recommendations.
“I put a mobile over my baby's crib, hoping the colors would be stimulating. But he doesn't seem to notice it. Could something be wrong with his eyesight?”
It's more likely there's something wrong with the mobileâat least, where it's located. A newborn baby focuses best on objects that are between 8 and 12 inches away from his eyes, a range that seems to have been selected by nature not randomly, but by designâit being the distance at which a nursing infant sees his mother's face. Objects closer to or farther away from a baby lying in his crib will be nothing but a blur to himâthough he'll fixate on something bright or in motion even in the distance if there's nothing worth looking at within his range of vision. Your baby will also spend most of his time looking to his right or left, rarely focusing straight ahead or overhead in the early months. So a mobile directly above his crib isn't likely to catch his attention, while one hung to one side or the other may. But even a mobile hung in the right place may not move your baby, at least not right away. Most babies don't pay attention to mobiles at all until they're closer to 3 to 4 weeks or even older, and others will always find something better to look at.
Even though your newborn's vision is a work in progress (it will take several months for his focus to mature, and he won't be able to perceive depth well until 9 months), he still loves to look. And gazing at the world is one of the best ways he has of learning about it. So what should you give him to look at besides his favorite sightâyou? Most young babies like to study facesâeven crudely drawn ones, and especially their own in crib mirrors (though they won't recognize them as their own until well after their first birthday). Anything with high contrast, such as patterns of black and white or red and yellow, will capture more attention than subtle ones, and simple objects will score more than complex ones. Light is a baby mesmerizerâwhether it's from a ceiling track, a lamp, or a window (especially one through which light is filtered via the slats of blinds).
Vision screening will be part of your baby's regular checkups. But if you think your baby doesn't seem to be focusing on well-located objects or faces or doesn't turn toward light, mention this to his doctor at the next visit.
“The swelling is down around my baby's eyes. Now she seems cross-eyed.”
What looks like crossed eyes is probably just extra folds of skin at the inner corners of those precious peepers. If that's the case, which it usually is with newborns, the skin will retract as your baby grows, and her eyes will probably begin to seem more evenly matched. During the early months, you may also notice that your baby's eyes don't work in perfect unison all the time. These random eye movements mean she's still learning to use her eyes and strengthening her eye muscles. By
3 months, coordination should be much improved.
Check with the pediatrician if you don't notice any improvement in her eye coordination, or if her eyes always seem to be out of sync. If there is a possibility of true crossed eyes (strabismus, in which the baby uses just one eye to focus on what she's looking at, and the other seems aimed anywhere), consultation with a pediatric ophthalmologist is in order. Early treatment is important, because so much that a child learns she learns through her eyes, and because ignoring crossed eyes could lead to “lazy” eye, or amblyopia (in which the eye that isn't being used becomes lazy, and consequently weaker, from disuse).
“At first, there were no tears when my baby cried. Now her eyes seem filled with tears even when she's not crying. And sometimes they overflow.”
Tiny tears don't start flowing out of the tiny eyes of newborns until close to the end of the first month. That's when the fluid that bathes the eye (aka tears) is produced in sufficient quantity by the glands over the eyeballs. The fluid normally drains through the small ducts located at the inner corner of each eye, and into the nose (which is why a lot of crying can make your nose run). The ducts are particularly tiny in infants, and in about 1 percent of babiesâyours includedâone or both are blocked at birth.
Since a blocked tear duct doesn't drain properly, tears fill the eyes and often spill over, producing the perpetually “teary-eyed” look even in happy babies. But the clogged ducts are nothing to worry about. Most will clear up by themselves by the end of the first year without treatment, though your baby's doctor may show you how to gently massage the ducts to speed up the process or suggest you drop a little breast milk into the eye to help clear the clog. (Always wash your hands thoroughly first before using massage. If baby's eyes become puffy or red, stop massaging and tell the doctor.)
Sometimes, there is a small accumulation of yellowish white mucus in the inner corner of the eye with a tear duct blockage, and the lids may be stuck together when baby wakes up in the morning. Mucus and crust can be washed away with water and cotton balls. A heavy, darker yellow discharge and/or reddening of the whites of the eye, however, may indicate infection or another condition that requires medical attention. The doctor may prescribe antibiotic ointments or drops, and if the duct becomes chronically infected, may refer your baby to a pediatric ophthalmologist. Call the doctor if a tearing eye seems sensitive to light or if one tearing eye looks different in shape or size from the other.
“My baby sneezes all the time. He doesn't seem sick, but I'm afraid he's caught a cold.”
New babies have plenty to sneeze at besides colds. For one thing, sneezing is a protective reflex that allows your baby to clear out amniotic fluid and excess mucus that might be trapped in his respiratory passages. Frequent sneezing (and coughing, another protective reflex) also help him get rid of foreign particles that make their way into his button nose from his environmentâmuch as sniffing pepper makes many adults sneeze. Your baby may also sneeze when exposed to light, especially sunlight.
“Everybody says that my baby's smiles are âjust gas,' but she looks so happy when she does it. Couldn't they be real?”
No new parent wants to believe that baby's first smiles are the work of a passing bubble of gasânot a wave of love meant especially for mommy or daddy. But scientific evidence so far seems to back up this age-old buzz kill: Most babies don't smile in the true social sense before 4 to 6 weeks of age. That doesn't mean that a smile is always “just gas.” It may also be a sign of comfort and contentmentâmany babies smile as they are falling asleep, as they pee, or as their cheeks are stroked.
When baby does reveal her first real smile, you'll know it (your baby will engage her whole face in the smile, not just her mouth), and you'll melt accordingly. In the meantime, enjoy those glimpses of smiles to comeâundeniably adorable no matter what their cause.
“My baby gets the hiccups all the time. Do they bother him as much as they do me?”
Some babies aren't just born hiccupers, they're hiccupers before they're born. And chances are, if your baby hiccuped a lot on the inside, he'll hiccup plenty in the first few months on the outside, too. What causes those hiccups? One theory is that they're yet another in baby's repertoire of reflexes. Another theory is that infants get hiccups when they gulp down formula or breast milk, filling their tummies with air. Later on, giggles may bring on the hiccups. Whatever the trigger, hiccups don't bother your baby. If they bother you, try letting your baby breastfeed or suck on a bottle or pacifier, which may quell the attack.
Baby Development
First smiles, first coos, first time rolling over, first unassisted sit, first attempt at crawling, first steps. Your little one's first year is a baby book of momentous milestones just waiting to be filled out. But when will your little one reach those milestones, you wonder? Will that first smile come at an impressively early 4 weeks ⦠or a wait-for-it 7? Will your baby roll ahead when it comes to rolling overâor lag behind? Sit out crawling? Or run circles around the babies in the neighborhood before they've even pulled up to a stand? And is there anything you should doâor can doâto speed up your baby's progress on the developmental road ahead?
