What Little Remains (The Fallout Trilogy Book 1) (6 page)

My back is stiff from sleeping on the floor in Nicole’s
cabin. I sit up, placing my pounding head in my hands. Ricky and I got into a
huge fight last night. The memories of the fight come rushing back.
 

Guilt creeps up for fighting with him the day before he was
going to leave.

But it wasn’t even my fault. I didn’t start the fight. I
don’t have anything to feel guilty about, despite what he seems to think. I saw
another side of him last night, one that I don’t think I like.

He lost his mother when he was five and was raised by an
abusive, alcoholic father who could not have cared less about him. I always
wondered how it was going to affect him. I guess I’m starting to see it. I
thought that the drinking would get better over time. He just needed to adjust
to his new life here and then it would start to get better. I also thought the
jealousy would go away as he learned to trust me. Neither has improved. They’ve
only gotten worse. I wonder if the alcohol causes the jealousy or if it just
brings out what he is able to hide under normal circumstances.

After what happened last night, I think that I need some
distance from Fort Lee to get a new perspective on my situation. My mom always
used to say a fresh perspective can help any situation. Whenever I was angry
about something, she’d tell me to take a walk or go to my room. Her advice was
always to get out of my head to see the situation with new eyes.

I think that getting out will allow me to do just that.

I go to say good-bye to Ricky like I promised. That way, at
least one of us is honest and keeps their word. All of the men not on duty see
Ricky off. Junior, Pete, Alec, Jack and Ricky are the only ones going. Junior
and Pete have been around since the beginning, but I don’t know them very well.
They seem to have a rough edge to them that I’m not as used to. It is something
that I am starting to recognize in Ricky.
 

I stand off to the side, not seeing Ricky yet.

“You said he was drunk last night,” Nicole whispers in my
ear. “Maybe he’s hung over.”

I shrug, ready to leave, when a hand slides onto my
shoulder, giving it a squeeze. Daren watches from behind Ricky, his eyes
jumping between the two of us, making sure that his friend doesn’t do anything
stupid. Daren isn’t the only person who is watching this interaction.

“I didn’t think you’d come,” Ricky whispers, turning me
around to face him. His eyes are blood shot, and he didn’t shave this morning.

“I don’t lie,” I say.

Ricky swallows and looks around. “I’m just glad you came.”

I nod my head and glance back to see that Nicole isn’t
behind me anymore.
So much for support.
I turn around
to see her and Alec saying goodbye. Her legs are wrapped around his waist, her
face buried in his neck. I shake my head, amused. Ricky moves next to me,
slipping his hand in mine. He looks different than he did last night or even
the day before. He looks humbled, but not defeated. He wears his bulletproof
vest and a long, tight black sleeve shirt. His camouflage pants have seen
better days.

He’s wearing more weapons than normal. He has two knife
handles coming up over either of his shoulders. I’ve seen him practice with
those before. He moves fast with both in his hands, using them in close combat,
when shooting a gun isn’t an option. He has six more knives strapped down on
the front of his vest. They are throwing knives designed for him. There is a
shotgun slung across his back, two semi-automatic handguns on his hips and two
more on his thighs.
 

“You used to kiss me like that,” he says, looking down at
me, his eyes kind.

“You used to treat me like I was the most incredible thing
you ever saw,” I say, tilting my head to look at him. “Looks like things
change.”

A sad smile crosses his face. “Things do change. Which is
why I have hope.”

“For what?”

“For us,” he says, and when I sigh he cups my face with his
free hand, stepping close to me.

He doesn’t give up. Despite all the horrible things that he
has seen, he has never lost sight of hope. Especially when it comes to me.

“Let’s just talk about this when you get back,” I say. I
don’t want him to leave and something to happen to him with us fighting.

“Okay,” he says with a smile. He leans down and presses his
lips on mine.

I break the kiss, wrapping my arms around him. Hugging him
when he has all this gear on is awkward.

“Be safe,” I say, pulling back and wrapping my arms around
myself. “That’s an order. I don’t like you going out knowing there is a large
scavenger group nearby.” Even though I’m about to do the same thing.

“Will do,” he promises with one last kiss.

He leans up, a smile on his face. He takes a step away from
me, and his expression melts. His puts his game face on, ready to face any
threat outside the walls.

“
Alright
men, let’s move out,” he
says, leading them out of the gate.

He walks out without looking back. He never looks back.

Nicole loops her arm through mine. “I hate to see them go,
but I love to watch them leave.”

I roll my eyes and look around for Daren. He’s standing off
to the side, with his arms crossed, hands tightened into fists. He’s watching
them walk away, and shakes his head. His eyes are troubled. What does he know
that I don’t?

A gentle tug from Nicole nudges my curiosity away, ushering
in excitement instead.

“Everything packed?” I ask her.

“Yep,” she says, grinning. “We need to leave soon.”

“I’ll take care of Daren,” I say, bumping my hip against
hers. I take her with me.

“Hey sexy man,” I say, getting Daren’s attention.

He looks over at me, surprised. “What can I do for the two
most beautiful ladies in this place?”

“I’m not feeling too great,” I say, putting my free hand
over my stomach. “And neither is Nic. Last night was rough, and I didn’t get
much sleep. We’re going to stay in today, probably sleeping. I was wondering if
you could find someone to take over cooking dinner for us.”

“Yeah, sure,” he says, looking worried. He looks at the gate
that Ricky just left through. “Is everything okay? Do you need to go see John?”

“No,” I assure him with a smile. “This is something that
comes around every month.”

His eyes widen as he gets the picture. “Okay, yeah. Why
don’t you go relax? Dinner is taken care of. Do you want me to bring you
anything?”

“No,”
Nic
says with a soft smile.
“I have food in my cabin, so we’ll be set.”

“But thank you for offering,” I say, reaching out and
touching his arm.

He gives me a smile, but someone calls for him. He gives me
a nod and walks away.

“He won’t be checking on me at all today,” I say with a
laugh. Men are so weird about girls and their feminine problems.

“Come on,” Nicole says. “We need to do this right.”

We split up to gather supplies. Nicole goes to the bunker to
get some food, and I go back to Ricky’s cabin for a few things. He keeps knives
under his bed, and I am going to borrow them. We meet back at her house and
change clothing. Since we are going to be walking around in a forest, I
suggested that we wear pants to protect our legs from unwanted bug attention. I
slip a knife under my pants leg and give another to Nicole to do the same.

I think that we will be safe, but I’m not stupid. We have
backpacks with blankets, food, matches, and extra clothing in case something
happens. It’s best to be cautions.

I look out the door and see people heading towards the
bunker. I lead the way to the house closest to our escape route. Nicole and I
walk like we normally would, laughing like something is funny. Just like
always, around lunch hour, the guards change shifts. The second shift guards
are a few seconds late because they retrieve their weapons.

The two guards watching the south gate walk towards the
bunker, boredom in their step. Once they are out of sight, Nicole and I walk
for the gate, like everything is normal.

I glance around, not seeing anyone. Hope tickles my stomach,
and I almost can’t believe our good luck. I keep my mouth shut, not wanting to
jinx it. My heart is pounding with excitement and my hands tingle with the
thrill of getting away from this place.

We walk out of the gate, our route mapped out. I’ve seen
Jack’s map enough to know the area. We’re going a couple miles west of here to
a small clearing that Jack found. It’d be good for growing, but we couldn’t
maintain or watch it without separating people, and Ricky didn’t want to chance
that.

It is far enough off the road that scavengers shouldn’t be
an issue. The knife attached to my ankle is a constant reminder that I still
need to be on guard.

My ears are straining, waiting to hear Daren’s booming voice
yelling at me for being stupid. Twenty minutes pass before I crack a smile and
elbow Nicole playfully in the side.

“We did it,” I say and then throw my hands up in the air.
“WE DID IT!”

I laugh, a huge weight lifts from my chest, and I can
breathe for the first time in a long time.

“This is wonderful,” I say, watching the sunlight and
shadows move against me as I walk through the trees. Seven months in the same
enclosed area is enough to drive anyone nuts.

I used to think my hometown, Appleheart, Virginia, was
small. The population was less than two thousand. We had one grade school, one
high school, and two churches: one Baptist and one Catholic. Everyone knew
everyone and was always in other people’s business. When I was twelve and got
my first bra, the whole town knew about it before I even got home. I was
mortified until it happened to all of my other friends.

It was like that with everything. Every big moment in my
life was celebrated with almost everyone in the town.

Appleheart was so small we didn’t have any of the chain
stores or supermarkets. Most of the produce was grown right there in town, and
the meat was from a town over. We got our main groceries from Aunt Lucie’s
Everything You Need Grocery Store. If the store didn’t have it, she would order
it with no added cost for shipping.

For shopping, we had to drive almost two hours to the next
big city.

I knew I wanted to get out when I was fifteen. I wanted
something more than a small-town life. I wanted a fresh start where no one knew
what guy I had a crush on or what my bra size was. Then October 1 happened, and
all of that changed.

The world came crashing down. Or more like the ground under
our feet started crashing together. I don’t know what happened or what caused
it to happen. I watched the news as massive earthquakes brought down cities.
Tsunamis, hurricanes, lightning storms, and flash floods brutalized different
parts of the world. We lost our television signal within hours after the
destruction started and have no idea how many people were lost. The devastation
was so sudden, violent, and intense that no one really had a chance to protect
themselves
.

Cellphones stopped working. Landlines didn’t work.
Appleheart got hit with a tornado and after that we felt tremors from an
earthquake. Things settled, but the survivors were waiting for the other shoe
to drop.

The other shoe never dropped.
 
Ricky and I started to rebuild in Fort
Lee, making it into a new home for us. The differences between this old army
base and Appleheart are few, the main difference being that I don’t know
everyone here. I don’t know what their past or their future will hold.

Just like in Appleheart, there is hardly room to breathe or
even think without someone seeing. Everyone knows my business because of my
involvement with Ricky.

I went from a small town to a fish bowl.

“This is totally worth it,” Nicole says, bumping her hip
against mine.

I smile. “This is exactly what we needed. No testosterone.
No overly interested people. No chaos. No rules.”

Nicole pulls out a compass that we “borrowed” from Ricky and
hands it to me.

“You know how to work this thing?”

I shrug my shoulders. “I hope so. If worse comes to worst,
you packed enough food for a week. When Ricky gets back and realizes that I’m
not there, it’ll take him five minutes to find me.”

“I hope it doesn’t come to that,” Nicole says, a small smile
on her face. “Ricky would leave me here.”

“
Nic
, you know I wouldn’t let him
do that,” I say. “Plus you could easily find your way back on your own.”

Nicole rolls her eyes, not amused. “But seriously, have you
noticed that he doesn’t bring anyone back anymore?”

“I noticed.”

I noticed a long time ago, but
Nic
bringing it up resurfaces the memory. Ricky and I had a conversation about it.
His mood had changed after he stopped bringing people back. He was more
stressed and stretched thin.