Wes and Toren (24 page)

“Oh, then let’s go to the U-Mall. The food court’s open ’til nine, right?”

“Uh…yeah. Okay, let’s do that.”

I called Wesley and left a message that I was going to be late when Josh went to the bathroom. I told him to heat up the beef stew in the fridge, but I somehow doubted he would do that. He was probably dining on beer, potato chips, and ice cream.

“So, how do you like college so far?” Josh asked, taking a bite of the sandwich he bought. He offered to buy something for me, but I declined. I would probably have the rest of the stew when I got home.

“Better than high school?”

“Yeah, tons better. I was so happy when I graduated from high school. I vowed never to step foot in that place again,” I said, flipping through my notebook.

“Yeah, I hear you. I didn’t like high school either. Actually, I hated high school. I was such a nerd back then. Well, I guess I still am. But….”

“C’mon! Nerds are the new ‘cool’,” I said, especially because I could include myself in that category. Josh laughed and nodded his head.

“Did you go to school around here?” he asked.

“Yeah. I went to Lincoln. Where did you go?”

“I didn’t live around here. About three hours away.”

“Oh, do you live in the dorms then?”

“Not anymore, but I did, my first year. I have an apartment now.”

“That’s so cool! I always wanted to live in the dorms, but I’m only about ten minutes away.”

“Still live with your folks?”

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“No, I live with my…roommate.” I looked down at the table.

“Boyfriend” was on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn’t say it. I was disappointed in myself. If I had more confidence, I could’ve said it without caring what Josh or anyone else thought.

Josh finished his sandwich and we studied for an hour or two. I lost track of time and when I glanced at the clock, it was almost eight-thirty and I wanted to be home by nine.

“Oh! I gotta get going or I’m gonna miss the bus,” I said, packing up my things quickly.

“Huh? Don’t worry about it. I can give you a ride,” Josh said, resting his chin in the palm of his hand.

I glanced at the clock again. I wasn’t sure if I could make it to the bus stop on time. “Are you sure? I don’t wanna trouble you.”

“It’s okay. You said you live close, so I don’t mind,” he said, tilting his head and smiling.

“Thanks. I really appreciate it.”

We studied for another fifteen minutes, but then decided to call it a night. Josh drove a red Focus and took me home in half the time the bus ride would have taken. I thanked him for helping me study and for the ride while he smiled and shook his head.

“Oh, Toren. Wait a sec,” Josh said, getting out and walking around the back of his car by the time I turned around. “I almost forgot.”

Josh slipped his hand around the back of my head and kissed me.

My body froze and I didn’t exactly know what to do. He pushed his tongue between my lips and before I could struggle to get away, I heard Wesley’s voice.

“Toren? What the hell is going on?” Wesley shouted, carrying a garbage bag in one hand.

I pushed Josh away and my stomach tightened. Wesley dropped the trash bag and I could see how angry he was. Of course he would be angry; I would be angry too if I saw Wesley kissing someone else. Just the thought made my stomach drop.

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“What the hell are you doing?” he shouted.

I stared at the ground. I couldn’t believe what had just happened.

“Oh. You got a boyfriend?” Josh said. I could feel him staring at me.

“Yeah. He does,” Wesley answered for me. “And who the hell are you?”

“Sorry. I didn’t know. I didn’t know you had a boyfriend. Honest,”

Josh said, taking a step back with his hands up as a sign of concession.

“Well, I should probably get going.” He passed Wesley and lowered his voice. “Sorry about that, seriously. He’s just so tempting, you know?”

“What?” Wesley yelled, watching him walk around the front of the car with narrowed eyes.

“See you in class, Toren,” Josh said with a faint grin.

Wesley glared at Josh until he drove away and then he looked at me. Tears rimmed my eyes and I gripped the strap of my book bag.

“So, who the hell was that?” Wesley asked without lifting his heavy gaze.

“Wesley, it…it’s not what you think.”

“Then what is it? You were kissing him!” His eyes flared with anger and my heart sank. Wesley lowered his gaze and his voice became quieter, but still tinged with anger. “So, were you really just ‘studying’?”

he asked, glancing at me from the corners of his eyes.

“How—how can you ask that?”

“You were
kissing
him!” Wesley shouted again, his voice breaking with anger. His face was tense and he was grinding his teeth. I had never seen Wesley look like that before. His clenched fists relaxed like he had given up. He stooped and picked up the trash bag. “I have to take the garbage out.”

“Wesley! Please, listen to me!”

“I said, I have to take the garbage out. Just go inside,” he said, turning his back to me.

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“Wesley….”

“I said, go inside!”

Tears rolled down my cheeks as he walked away from me. My shoulders slumped and my heart dropped, but I did as he said and went inside. I put my book bag down and waited by the door. Five minutes passed, then ten minutes, and Wesley still didn’t come back. I wrung my hands together. He had never yelled at me like that before. The door opened after a long fifteen minutes and Wesley stepped inside. He glanced at me and looked away quickly.

“Wesley.”

“There’s some stew left in the fridge if you want it,” he said and walked past me.

I reached out and grabbed Wesley’s hand. The look on his face pained me to the point that I felt I should be punished.

“Wesley, please! It’s not what you think, I swear! You have to believe me!”

Wesley stared at the floor and narrowed his eyes painfully. His voice was weak and he at once seemed so helpless. “But, you were kissing him….”

“I…. I didn’t want to. He surprised me. Wesley, I’m sorry.” I bit my bottom lip and looked up at Wesley. “I don’t want anyone else. I don’t want to do that with anyone but you,” I said, stepping closer and grasping his T-shirt in my hands. “You have to believe me.”

Wesley pulled my head to his chest and wrapped his strong arms around me. I heard his heart beating and his warmth on my cheek. He took a deep breath and squeezed me tighter. “I do believe you. But I just don’t trust bastards like that asshole. So, don’t let anything like that ever happen again,” he said. I could feel his chin on the top of my head as he spoke. “You really have no idea how cute you are, how many guys check you out. I know you’re with me, but I can’t help but feel nervous that someone might try to steal you away.”

“Now you know how I feel all the time,” I said. “It makes me happy that people think you’re hot and proud that you chose to be with 182

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me. But it also makes me worry that someone might take you away from me.”

Wesley’s embrace slackened and he took my face in his large, hot hands. He stared long into my eyes and with the slightest grin, he brushed his thumb over my lips.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked in an awkward, yet seductive voice.

“Why are you asking?”

“I’m not even sure.”

“You’re the only one who doesn’t have to ask,” I whispered, closing my eyes and feeling his lips touch mine.

It was a simple kiss and he pulled back and looked into my eyes again. He took a deep breath and neared my lips again, staying longer and sucking my tongue. The kiss became deeper and stronger and I lost my breath.

“Tor, I love you so much I don’t even know what to do with myself,” he said, touching his forehead to mine.

“I love you too,” I murmured breathlessly. I kissed him sweetly, timidly, and wrapped my arms around his neck. “Make love to me.”

Wesley bent over and lifted me up. I kept my arms around his neck and my entire body throbbed with an aching longing that only this man could ease.

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“I’M leaving for work,” Wesley whispered, leaning down and kissing my ear. “So, I’ll see you tonight. Good luck on your test. Love you,” he said, brushing my shoulder blades with his fingertips.

I blinked my eyes and turned onto my back. “Wesley, wait,” I said, sitting up and looking down at my lap.

“Hmm?”

Wesley stopped and looked over his shoulder. His profile was outlined by the dim morning light and his features softened handsomely.

I swallowed hard; my lower body had already responded to his alluring image.

“Fuck me before you go,” I said quietly, daring to look up at Wesley’s face. His eyes rounded, but a mischievous grin took over his surprise.

“I hope you’re serious, ’cause you just flicked the switch,” Wesley said, taking a step toward the bed.

I blushed to my ears and Wesley sat down on the edge of the bed.

He pulled the sheet back and smiled. His fingers crawled up my thigh and met me softly. His hand rose and fell, squeezing and rubbing, and I sucked in air sharply, closing my eyes at the intense pleasure.

“Open your thighs more,” he said, sitting up on one knee and unzipping his pants.

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I leaned forward and lapped at his lips. He tasted like toothpaste and I smiled. I rolled to my side and climbed up on my knees.

“But, I wanna do it the other way,” Wesley said, pouting.

“But your clothes’ll get messy,” I answered, rocking back against him.

Wesley grasped my backside and teasingly dabbed at the entrance.

He leaned forward and kissed the small of my back. My voice escaped my control; I was pleading with him. I pushed back against him.

“Wes.…Wesley, don’t tease me,” I whimpered and finally, Wesley pushed his way in.

His navy pants clung to his hips and I only managed to get one button on his shirt open. He pushed forward, moving me at will, and I buried my face in the pillow to stifle the moan in my throat. Wesley’s movements became deeper and my body was awake to his every touch and breath.

“Harder,” I whispered, pushing back against him. “Please, harder!”

I wasn’t sure where this insatiable passion came from, but I couldn’t get enough. I felt like I was going to overflow.

Wesley grunted, sighed, then relaxed behind me. I felt him withdraw, his hands brushing over my back and rear as he leaned back on his heels. I tried to catch my breath and slumped onto the bed, happy and exhausted. Wesley cleaned up, zipped up, and kissed the nape of my neck.

“This is the best reason I could ever come up with for being late,”

Wesley said, refastening the single button I got undone. He smiled from the doorway, so handsome. “Good luck on your test.”

“I’m gonna ace it for sure!” I said, rolling to Wesley’s side of the bed and pulling the sheet up.

“Don’t I know it,” he smiled, and then slapped the doorframe. “Oh yeah. If Gus calls, just tell him I was balls-deep in your ass and that I’m on my way now.”

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My cheeks flared and Wesley laughed. “Go!” I shouted, turning still redder.

“Love you.”

“Love you too,” I answered. “Don’t forget; I’m going to that club meeting tonight.”

“Oh yeah. The ‘gay club.’ Okay. Give me a call when you’re done and I’ll come and get you.”

Wesley left and I heard the front door open and close. I fell asleep again and almost missed my first class. I got dressed and ran for the bus, catching it just in time. I went to class and to the library afterward. I usually went to the U-Mall before bio lab, but I wasn’t quite ready to see Josh yet. What happened the other day seemed like a hazy memory, yet I was nervous to see him.

Wesley was the only person I had ever kissed. It was wrong of me to compare their kisses, but Wesley’s was just…better. I waited for his kiss, anticipated it, fantasized about it, desired it. Josh’s kiss was cold; I didn’t like it and I didn’t want it. I felt guilty thinking about it, but it made me realize how much I loved Wesley and how much I wanted to be with him.

I made it to class just as Professor Kitner was passing the exams out. Josh smiled and whispered “Hi” and I smiled back, feeling my cheeks turn bright red. I took the test as fast as possible, hoping to finish before Josh did. I turned in my exam and then went to the U-Mall to study until the club meeting started at 7:30.

“Toren! Welcome!” Professor Kitner greeted as I stepped into room 212.

I smiled and waved shyly. There were a lot of kids in the room and I felt my cheeks tinge. Girls and boys looked up at me and smiled or nodded until Josh stood up.

“Hey, Toren. C’mon, sit down,” Josh said, touching my back.

I put my book bag down and wondered if anyone in the classroom knew that we had kissed. Josh sat down at the desk beside me, Professor Kitner grinned in my direction, and I felt my ears get hot. My stomach 186

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tightened and suddenly I wanted to leave. I took a deep breath and Professor Kitner started the meeting, drawing Josh’s gaze away from me.