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Despite gasping for air, I quickly grabbed some tissues and wiped his face and neck.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered shyly, feeling embarrassed.
Wesley smiled at me and licked the cum off his fingers. I took a deep breath. He never looked so unbelievably sexy before. I stepped out of my shorts and boxers and pulled my shirt off. I crawled onto the bed and rested the side of my face and shoulders on the mattress with my ass high in the air. Wesley’s eyes seemed to glaze over and it actually looked like there was a little drool at the corner of his mouth. I giggled, blushed, and asked what he was waiting for.
Wesley shed his clothes and grabbed the tube of lotion from the drawer in my nightstand. He drizzled some on my backside and rubbed some on himself. I looked back at him as I felt the first of him.
“God, you’re so fucking hot,” he said, pushing his way inside with slow, short thrusts. He grasped my hips as he plunged in deeper and I rocked against him. When he was fully within me, he stopped. “I love you,” he whispered and began to pump again. “I love you,” he repeated, grunting each time he said it.
“I…love you. God! I love you,” I whimpered, gripping the sheet with balled fists. Of all the times we had sex, this was the best. It never felt so good. We were really making love.
Wesley came first, which triggered my intense orgasm. I exhaled completely and Wesley collapsed, pushing me down into the mattress.
He was breathing heavily in my ear and I bit my lip; even that was sexy.
He rolled to his back and slid his hands under his head. I remained on my stomach and propped myself up on my elbows.
“Wow,” I sighed quietly, happily.
Wesley looked at me with a grin. “I take it you’re satisfied?”
“Of course, but it’s just so amazing to be able to say I love you,” I explained, staring at the sheet with a shy smile. Wesley brushed the hair from my eyes, then touched my lips with his finger and nodded. “You know, I’ve wanted to say it for a while now,” I confided, casting my eyes downward.
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Wesley slid his hand behind his head again. “Why didn’t you?”
I looked at Wesley and blushed. He was incredibly handsome. He made my heart beat faster just by looking at him. I rested my head on his chest and breathed in deeply. It was the smell of Wesley, not the smell of soap or shampoo, but the smell of Wesley himself.
“I was afraid to,” I said at last, taking another deep breath. “I thought maybe it was too soon. And because I was scared you might not say it back.”
Wesley’s chest muscles tightened and I could hear his heartbeat speed up. “Why would you think that? I fell in love with you the moment I saw you.”
I lifted myself up on my elbows again and looked at Wesley with a whisper of a smile. “I don’t believe in love at first sight,” I said flatly.
“Okay. Well, then, I
lusted
after you the moment I saw you. Then, I watched you closely. You were so cute and shy and…I fell in love. But, Tor, you really should have more confidence. You’ve got a ton to offer.
And I don’t just mean your cute ass,” he said, trying to lighten the weight of his words.
I laughed and smiled, closing my eyes. I felt so lucky to be with him, that he would choose to be with me. It never escaped my thoughts that Wesley could have anyone he wanted. He said he loved me, but I was still insecure that one day he might change his mind.
“I love you,” I whispered.
“What? I didn’t hear you,” he answered.
“I love you,” I said again, a little louder.
“One more time?” he said, furrowing his brows and pointing to his ear.
I crawled on top of him, straddling his thighs, and leaned down close to his face. “I said, I love you. I love you I love you I love you.”
He ran his hands up and down my arms. “Just hearing you say that, with that face, we’re gonna have to do it again,” he said, turning his smile into a grin.
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I looked down and felt Wesley against my thigh. I pushed into him, rubbing against his groin, and smiled. “Tell me about it.”
Wesley looked down and then grasped my hips. “Well, hop on. I’ll give you the ride of your life.”
I raised my hips and scooted up. I sat back on his thighs and brought my knees up. I tried to position myself as Wesley watched me with a sweet look. My face flushed and I looked to the side.
“Help…me,” I whispered shyly.
Wesley slid his fingers from my backside, over my thighs, and between my legs. He held himself steady with one hand and felt for the entrance with his other hand. He told me to push down and I did, taking him in millimeters at a time.
My face and ears were hot and I felt embarrassed. I was on top before, but not like this. Wesley always did the moving and now he was waiting for me. It felt incredible as I slowly began to move up and down.
Wesley watched me closely, his face intense and unbelievably sexy. My embarrassment ebbed as I moved with more confidence. Wesley brought his hand up and pulled on me gently. I squeezed my eyes shut as I was coming to climax and Wesley rubbed the tip with the palm of his hand, smearing pre-cum all over me and his hand.
“Oh God, Wesley!” I came hard into his hand and soon after, he erupted within me. I slumped down, depending on Wesley to keep me from falling over. He was still inside me and I heaved in breath as he held my head to his chest.
“You had one hell of an orgasm,” he said happily. I couldn’t even respond. Wesley lay back on the pillow and smiled. “Let’s stay like this forever.”
WE lay in bed for hours, Wesley resting his head on my chest. He picked up my hand and held it to his. His fingers were a little longer than mine were and thicker with large knuckles. He examined my fingers and wrist, my arm to my elbow, then looked at my chin, lips, nose, and eyes.
“You’re incredibly beautiful. Did you know that?” he asked. He kissed me and then sat up. “I should probably get home.”
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I sat up quickly and looked at his calm, handsome face. I told him that he didn’t have to go, that my mom would let him stay over.
“I’m gonna have to go home sooner or later,” he said. “I might as well get it over with.”
I watched him closely as he got out of bed and got dressed. He always found new ways to amaze me. If I was in his shoes, I would never be brave enough to go home. Wesley leaned down and kissed the top of my head.
“Don’t worry. It’s gonna be okay. I’ll make my parents understand, and if they don’t, well,
you
don’t have anything to worry about. I already told you; I’ll choose you no matter what,” Wesley said, patting my head as if I was a child. I didn’t mind though. I needed to hear his reassurance and to feel his large hands protecting me.
Wesley left me at the door with a long kiss good night. I watched him walk down the stairs and out to the sidewalk. I noticed that his shoulders slumped under the yellow streetlight as he started walking home. My shoulders slumped too. I couldn’t imagine what Wesley was feeling. He was facing all the fears I had in my heart and he did so with courage and pride. I thought about Mrs. Carroll and my stomach dropped when I thought of Mr. Carroll. How could I ever face them again? What face did I have to show?
I cleaned up in the bathroom and then stripped the sheets from my bed. I put on a fresh set and balled up the dirty ones. I hesitated, and then held the rumpled ball to my nose. It smelled like Wesley. It smelled like sex. It smelled like love. I grimaced. Would Wesley’s parents ever understand? Would they force him to break up with me? I fell on my bed and sobbed, hugging the lump of sheets like a teddy bear.
Alycia was spending the night at a friend’s house and Mom had to work until at least two. I felt alone, utterly alone with my fears, the way I felt every day before I met Wesley. His parents hated me now. Wesley was gonna dump me now. He said he loved me, but how could he choose me over his family? What choice was there?
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My eyes were tender from crying and I just wanted to sleep. I tossed and turned in bed, but my mind wouldn’t rest. Eventually, I got up and watched TV, hoping anything would occupy my mind.
“Tor? What are you doing up?” Mom asked, walking in the front door. Her scrubs were dirty and she dropped her purse on the kitchen table. “Don’t you have work tomorrow?” She came around the sofa and sat down when she saw my red, puffy eyes. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong?
Are you okay?” She pulled me close and hugged me tightly, holding my head to her shoulder.
I couldn’t say anything and tears began to fall again. I slid my arms around her thin shoulders and clung to her like a child with a skinned knee. As I gasped for air and choked on my sobs, I began to hiccup and she held me tighter. I told her what happened while she rubbed my back.
“Oh, baby, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
“They hate me now. Wesley’s parents think I’m disgusting, and I know they’ll make Wesley break up with me.”
“Sweetheart, listen, as much as I want to punch Wesley’s mom in the face, you have to understand that his mom was probably surprised and didn’t know how to react. Once she calms down, maybe she’ll understand. But, the world is full of different ideas and, I guess, this is just another lesson. But right now, Wesley needs
you
; not his parents, but the boy that he loves. Talk to him tomorrow and I’m sure he’ll put all your fears to rest. And, I don’t know if Wesley’s parents will ever understand, but it’s not up to them; it’s not their choice.”
Wesley said he’d choose me. I was almost scared to allow this little glimmer of hope into my heart.
“You know, the person you should talk to is your father. I’m sure he knows exactly how you feel,” Mom said, looking to the side with an indiscernible, yet pained expression. She kissed my forehead and smiled weakly. “You should get some sleep. Go to bed, sweetheart, and if you need me, come get me. Okay?”
I nodded, wiping at my tears. She hugged me tightly, hesitant to let go, and kissed my cheek again. I smiled and felt like I was telling her that it would be okay.
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I crawled into bed and hugged the bundle of sheets in my arms. I breathed in deeply and remembered Wesley’s face as he told me he loved me.
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I WENT to work with a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. My senses seemed fuzzy, like I wasn’t totally awake. I worked at the register, but I didn’t find extra things to do to fill in slow times like I usually did. I wondered what Wesley was doing. As time passed, I called his cell phone, but it went directly to voice mail each time. I wanted to talk to him, but I didn’t want to call his house in case one of his parents answered the phone. I took a lunch break around noon and Wesley still hadn’t called.
“Hey, are you all right, Toren? You seem a little off today,” my co-worker Jeanine asked, fixing me with her sharp eyes from the floor where she was pricing imported chocolate bars. Over her khaki pants and white collared shirt, she wore a navy smock with the World Store logo in white just like mine. She was really nice and funny and cute, with her long blonde hair and petite figure; I liked working with her.
“Yeah, I’m okay, thanks,” I answered, sighing and letting my shoulders sag.
“Are you sure? It’s just that, you’re usually so…chipper. You’re on your own plane of niceness—it’s like there’s normal-nice and then there’s Toren-nice,” she said, leaning back on her heels and resting the price gun on the floor.
I laughed quietly, embarrassed. She placed the chocolate bars on a sloped rack in front of the checkout and came around the register.
Leaning against the counter, she folded her arms. I stared at the ground for a long moment and fidgeted with my hands.
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“Well, it’s the person I’m seeing. The parents don’t like me very much,” I confided nervously, carefully avoiding pronouns.
“What? Are they crazy? You’re like every parent’s wet dream!
You’re smart, cute, funny, nice, polite. Should I keep going?”
I laughed self-consciously and glanced at the floor again. “It’s, well, sorta complicated.”
“Well, she likes you, right? That’s all that matters. Besides, if you just be yourself, her parents’ll warm up to you in no time,” she advised, bumping into me with her hip. She smiled warmly, and then furrowed her brows. “Do you know why they don’t like you, or at least, why you
think
they don’t like you?”
I took a deep breath. Just yesterday, I kissed Wesley on the street in the middle of the day. People were gonna find out about us now, one way or another. Maybe it was better if I told people at work, rather than having them hear it secondhand. Besides, I liked Jeanine; I trusted her.
“They, um, they don’t like me ’cause I’m a boy,” I said, squeezing my hands together. “I mean, his parents don’t like me ’cause I’m a boy.”
“Oh,” she said, nodding her head. She unfolded her arms and placed her hands on her hips. She knitted her brows and shook her head side-to-side. “Do people actually still think shit like that? You’ve gotta be kidding! But seriously, Toren,” she said, touching my arm, “if he likes you, who the hell cares what his parents think?”