Wash (5 page)

“
Then why are you carrying
this picture around?”

“
I haven’t been. I dug it
up last night after seeing Jake.”

She dug in her purse and reached for
her lighter. “Let’s burn this now.”

I let out a long breath. “Go ahead,” I
said, keeping it to myself that I had two more photos just like it
in my purse.

The low-burning, flickering orange
flame engulfed the picture, and Nadia dumped her glass of ice water
over the ashy remnants.

“
You’re gonna get us kicked
out of here,” I said, sopping up the water, “or arrested for
attempted arson.”

The waitress came rushing over. “You
can’t do that here! I’m afraid I’m gonna have to ask you to
leave.”

Nadia glanced up at her and grinned.
“I’m sorry. I suppose I got carried away, but we were burning up a
very bad memory.”

“
See, I was dumped on my
wedding day and…” I chimed in, but I couldn’t bear to go on with my
sordid, heartbreaking tale, especially not to a complete
stranger.

Her face softened, and I swallowed
hard, ashamed that I’d opened my big mouth; I’d never been one for
pity parties. “You don’t have to say another word,” she said. “Just
save the rest of your pictures for a big, roaring bonfire in your
backyard. Burn his clothes and all his stuff. That’ll teach him.”
With that, she smiled and walked off.

I swirled the wine in my glass. “You
should’ve seen him. He’s been working out, and he looked so
hot.”

“
I know. I saw
him.”

“
What!? When?”

“
At your mother’s
funeral.”

I cocked a brow. “Oh. I didn’t even
know he was there.”

“
Yeah, well, he kinda
lingered back in the shadows. He wanted to pay his respects without
upsetting you even more.”

“
Why didn’t you tell
me?”

“
Honey, you were a hot
mess. None of us wanted to add to your sadness.”

“
Did you talk to
him?”

“
We were all best friends
in high school, so yeah, but I really let him have it in the
parking lot. He just kept telling me how young and scared he
was.”

“
So he lives here
now?”

“
He said he moved back from
Texas a few days before your mom passed. He’s a firefighter, and
his job transferred him here. I bet he asked for the transfer so he
could be back with his family and, uh…his friends,” she said,
touching my arm.

“
I’m glad you didn’t tell
me,” I said. “I’m not sure I coulda handled seeing him at my
mother’s funeral.”

“
Oh, while I’m thinking of
it, I sketched some images for the fall line.” She handed me a
sketchbook.

I studied the designs. “Wow. Bold,
daring, and beyond stylish. I love them.”

She smiled. “I hoped so.”

“
Any word on the loan
yet?”

“
Not yet, but we’ll know
for sure by tomorrow or the next day.”

“
We’re gonna soar, girl. I
want to cater to all women—slim, tall, petite, and
plus-sized.”

“
Yep.
Just think of us as female
entrepreneurs using fashion to empower women and design a better
world.
”

“
That should be our
slogan,” I said. “I can’t wait to turn our fantastic ideas into a
successful business.”

“
You’re always
so…motivating, and you always make me feel so smart, stylish, and
business savvy. I feel like I can touch the moon.”

I winked. “You can.”

She smiled, then paused. “I have a big
favor to ask.”

“
What?”

“
Do you think you could
look after the boutique tomorrow? I’ve gotta take my mom to a
last-minute doctor’s appointment two hours from here. It’s with
some fancy specialist, so we don’t want her to have to
reschedule.”

“
Hmm. I have a big article
to write, and the deadline is tomorrow night.”

“
All you have to do is
write your opinion about the fancy party you attended.”

“
Well, I also have to
detail all the fashion aspects and choose the accompany photos out
of all the ones I took.”

“
Can’t you do it at the
shop? Just download your pics to the computer.”

“
You’re right. I can do
that and crop them and stuff. Don’t worry. I’ll cover for
ya.”

“
Are you sure?”

“
Absolutely.” Between
working my real job that paid the bills and working at the
boutique, I rarely had time to myself, but I couldn’t refuse to
help a friend.

“
Oh, and some more
inventory came in from the Hope Collection. Can you take care of
it?”

I smiled. “Of course. I’m on
it.”

“
As always. Thank you so
much. Speaking of that, we need to ship out all those online orders
too. I took care of about half of them.”

“
I’ll get the rest shipped
out.”

“
You’re a gem.” Nadia
slipped a wad of cash into the black folder that held the check.
“Listen, Ashly, I gotta run. Darrin’s waiting for me at home. It’s
movie night, and he’s already a little peeved at me for working all
those hours at the boutique last week. It took me forever to
categorize that order for the Moonlight Collection.”

“
You’ve been working too
much and too hard, Nadia. I would’ve helped more, but I had that
big assignment last week with my job.”

“
I know. It’s hard doing
both.”

“
Well, you guys have fun
and enjoy your movie. Tell Darrin I said hello.”

“
I will. I’ll call you
tomorrow.”

“
Thanks for dinner, by the
way. It was nice to get out for a change.”

She smiled widely. “That was the game
plan.”

I grinned, and she walked away. It was
eight p.m., and I dreaded going home to my lonely apartment. Most
of all, I didn’t want to think about Jake. His betrayal was still
too much to bear, and sulking and crying my eyes out didn’t seem
like the ideal way to spend a Friday night.

I turned my phone back on to see if
I’d missed any important messages. Just as I was about to turn it
off again, the phone rang, and Jake’s number was on the caller ID.
I sighed and answered it. “Jake, this needs to end right now.
Please stop calling me.”

“
Ashly! You finally
answered.”

“
I’m not sure why. There’s
nothing left to say,” I said sternly.

“
Please just hear me out,”
he said, his voice deep and pleading. “Will you just have one drink
with me? I’m at the White Coyote.”

“
No.”

“
Okay. I respect that.
Actually, I deserve it. But if you change your mind, I’ll be here
till midnight.”

“
I’d love to meet you, but
my boyfriend wouldn’t like that so much…and he really wouldn’t want
me to go gallivanting around the country with you
either.”

He chuckled.

“
I’m glad you find my love
life so amusing.”

“
You haven’t seen anyone in
over a year.”

I was livid. “And what makes you think
that? Have you been spying on me?”

“
We hang out in the same
circle of friends, sweetheart. They told me.”

“
Goodbye, Jake,” I said,
furious and hanging up the phone.

Chapter 4

During my drive home, Jake
tried calling a few more times, but I refused to pick up, growing
angrier by the moment.
How dare he step
back into my life? How dare he keep calling me like this!
I threw the phone on the passenger
seat.

I needed to see him, though, just so I
could personally tell him how pissed off I was. I needed to vent. I
hadn’t done a suitable or satisfying job of that back at the
lawyer’s office, and I needed closure. Watching that photo melt
into nothingness at the restaurant had been a good start, but I
needed more. I had never had the chance to confront him for
ditching me at the altar; like the coward he was, he had just split
and hopped on the first plane out of there. He didn’t even have the
nerve to say goodbye or leave a number where I could reach him. He
just vanished into thin air and had been gone for years. None of
our so-called “circle of friends” knew where he had disappeared to,
and his family refused to tell me anything. He’d helped me earn the
title of a jilted bride, and I was an authority on getting
dumped.

Worst of all, my ex-boyfriend, my
ex-loser, couldn’t face me after ruining our fairytale big day.
He’d made it clear that he wasn’t trustworthy or dependable. Most
painfully of all, he proved that he didn’t love me and probably
never had. Anyone who could stomp on my heart so easily couldn’t
possibly have had one of his own.

I opened the door to my house and
thought about the black and white pictures I’d taken of Jake all
those years ago. I’d always been a photography buff and had started
snapping photos at the ripe old age of ten. I’d often fantasized
about the great adventures I could have taking beautiful pictures
all over the world, but as a teenager, I developed an interest in
fashion, so my job now combined my two great loves.

After Jake left me, I attended Parsons
Fashion School, where I took classes in fashion photography and
journalism. I got a job as a fulltime fashion journalist with
Blare’s Fashion, which showcased high-end fashion clothing and
accessories. I knew the company would push the limits of my
creativity. I covered fashion shows and events, interviewed
important people in the world of fashion, wrote articles, took
pictures, responded to breaking news, created stories for the Web,
and performed several other tasks.

I also had many dreams of my own.
After starting a new line with Nadia, I wanted to start my own
magazine. I was sure I knew everything there was to know. After
all, I had drowned myself in work for years, ever since that
despicable loser had left me feeling empty.

Suddenly, I recalled my memory box
that I stored in the basement. I rushed down the stairs and dug
through piles of junk, boxes, and bags, until I found it. I quickly
thumbed through the pictures and found my favorite one: him,
standing naked against a black wall, covering his manhood with his
hands. I’d created shadows to cover the top part of his face,
giving him a mysterious and intriguing look. The black and white
image was amazing, and I wondered how the same shot would look with
his more mature, much more muscular body.

I stared at the picture, then looked
at all the others, recalling just how happy and in love we had once
been. I hadn’t looked upon those memories, those snapshots of our
moments, in years. Nadia told me to burn them, but I couldn’t bear
to for one reason or another. Not only were those pictures the
embodiment of the beginning of my career, but they were also
remnants of precious, albeit painful, memories. Jake had, after
all, bought me my first Nikon camera, and I used it all the time
and snapped pictures of anything and everything.

When I wasn’t shooting pictures, I
used my tripod to capture so many wonderful shots of us together. I
picked up the picture of Jake and me at the river, holding what
appeared to be the world’s biggest bass; we had equally huge smiles
on our faces. Then I looked at the pictures of us snuggled up
together on a blanket in the grass, so carefree and clueless to the
dark fate that loomed ahead for us. There was even a picture he
took of me, smiling as I held up my finger to show off my
engagement ring. It wasn’t big and fancy, but I didn’t care. Unlike
my mother, I had never cared much about money. I loved Jake for who
he was, and I couldn’t have cared less if that ring had been made
out of tin foil and plastic gems. The one thing I wanted it to be
was true, and in the end, it was just a lie.

When Jake crashed into my life, I was
a fifteen-year-old; a good girl who had never broken the rules. He
was the biggest, bad boy at our school, and my mother was horrified
when I started dating him. When I told her I loved him, she cried.
According to my mother, he didn’t fit in at all. She saw him as a
troublemaker, a poor kid who lived on the wrong side of town in the
projects. She didn’t think he was good enough for me, because his
father was in jail and his mother had a drug addiction. My mother
begged me to end it with him so many times, but I didn’t care what
she said. I loved him, in spite of his faults and his socioeconomic
difficulties. Because she’d been so dead-set against us being
together, I had to wonder why my mother would ask, postmortem, for
us to prance around the world together. Her will made absolutely no
sense.

As I thought about that, I realized I
had to see Jake, even if I wasn’t sure why. I was in a daze, not
even thinking straight. I did need closure, the chance to really
say goodbye, which I’d not been granted before.

I also needed to change into something
sweet, sassy, and sexy, just to show him what he’d missed out on. I
slipped into my dark-wash designer jeans and a black lace strapless
top with beaded heels. In the lawyer’s office, my hair had been
pulled back in a French braid, but this time, I was going to let it
down. After curling my hair, I gave myself that smoldering,
smoky-eye look that made my hazel eyes pop. I pushed my breasts up
to give him a glimpse of my cleavage. I worried that I might be
showing off too many curves and that maybe I should tone it down a
bit, but in the end, I decided he deserved to be tortured with what
he would never be able to touch again.