Wanting You (12 page)

“I’m not going anywhere until you hear what I have to say Tamia.”

“I can care less to what you have to say.”

“Damn it Tamia!” He says his hitting his palm against the door. “Baby please just listen to what I have to say. After you do, and you still want me to leave, I will.”

“Okay.” I whisper in response.

He steps away, giving me some space. I take that opportunity and I walk around him until I’m standing in the middle of the room, looking at him, and waiting to hear what he has to say.

He’s staring at me, contemplating on where to begin, and I can see nothing but hurt and love in his eyes. He was hurting also, and that was one of the reasons why I wanted to avoid this conversation, because I knew he wasn’t giving up on us. All I wanted to do was run from the situation, because I didn’t want to continue to feel the hurt and pain, and it was already hard enough that I still loved him. We stand there in several minutes of silence, just looking at each other.

“I didn’t tell my parents about Ashley.” I say breaking the silence. The look of confusion on his face, encourages me to continue. “I told them, that I was being really careless that night. That I left your apartment late, feeling really tired, being the reason to why I ran the stop sign that caused the accident.”

“Tamia.”

“I just couldn’t tell them Kellen.” I say feeling a tear slide down my cheek. “I just couldn’t do it. I mean my dad just had that heart attack, and I didn’t want to put him through that stress.” I say wiping away a tear.

Kellen steps away from the door and walks in my direction, until he’s standing in front of me. He hesitantly grabs my face with both of his hands and is staring down at me.

“Tamia, I’m sorry.”

“I am too. It’s probably best that we say goodbye now. With Ashley being pregnant, she’s going to need you.”

“Tamia don’t do this. You’ve got to listen to me.” He says bringing me closer. “If Ashley is in fact pregnant, it’s a possibility it could be someone else’s.”

“What?” I say confused.

“The night you showed up at my apartment, Ashley had a set of keys that she never returned. She showed up unannounced, and told me she was pregnant and that it’s a possibility that the dad could be a guy she cheated on me with. She failed to share that info with you, but by the time I tried to explain, you were already out the door.”

Shocked, I gently remove Kellen’s hands from my face and I take a seat on the bed. Kellen kneels in front of me and grabs my hands, then he continues.

“Tamia, I’m still trying to wrap my thoughts of possibly being a father. I promise to you that Ashley and I were always careful and used condoms. I understand condoms break but please believe me that I’ve never had unprotected sex with anyone, except with you. I know when we did, it wasn’t the smartest decision we made, but you’re the only one.”

“I believe you.” I respond.

Kellen gets on his knees, and wraps his arms around my waist bringing my body closer to his.

“If Ashley is pregnant, and it’s mine. I’m going to take responsibility and take care of my child, and I want you by my side. Ashley being pregnant doesn’t change the way I feel about you Tamia. I know there’s a lot going on and it seems like things keep popping up, that prevent us from being together. I’m asking you, and I hope this is the last time, but please don’t give up on us. I need you.”

“I need you too.”

Kellen leans forward and tenderly kisses my lips.

“How does your head feel?”

“Sore, but I’m fine.” I say pulling his head towards me until our lips touch again. I suck his bottom lip into my mouth, then I do the same to his top. I kiss him slowly allowing my tongue to explore every inch of his mouth. I was so addicted to his taste. He moans into my mouth, and I kiss him harder.

(Knock Knock)
“Room service!”

I pull away from Kellen’s lips and I remove my tank top. I lean back and scoot myself further up the bed until my head hits the pillow. Lifting my hips off the bed, I remove my sweats and panties. I toss them on the floor, and I wait for Kellen to make the next move. He stands looking at me with love and hunger in his eyes. Licking his lips he removes his shirt and tosses it to the floor.

(Knock Knock)
“Room service!”

We continue to ignore the poor guy on the other side of the door, who was only doing his job, but right now food was the last thing on our minds.

I watch as Kellen pulls his wallet from his back pocket. He removes several packets of condoms and tosses them on the bed. He puts his wallet on the night stand, then he removes his shoes, jeans, and boxers. He stands there for several seconds looking down at me while stroking his already hard erection. He gets on the bed, gently spreads my legs and begins placing kisses to my inner thighs, working his way down between my legs.

I open my legs wider, anticipating the first lick. He lowers his head and flicks his tongue over my clit, then sucks it into his mouth. He pulls away and separates my lower lips with his fingers, exposing myself to him, then begins tasting every inch of me.

“Kellen.” I moan. I could feel his tongue exploring the inside of me, and I didn’t want him to stop.

He places a kiss to my lower lips then makes his way up my body and settles himself between my legs. Leaning forward he runs his tongue across my lips, asking for permission to enter. I open my mouth allowing him entry, and I can taste myself on his lips.

Pulling his lips from mine, he reaches for a condom. Bringing it to his lips, he tears it open with his teeth, then hands it to me.

“Put it on.” He says against my lips.

I take the condom from his hands, then I reach between us and begin stroking his dick.

“Shit Tamia.”

I squeeze the tip of the condom and slowly roll it down his erection until it’s secured. I place it between my legs at my opening then I look up at Kellen, who’s staring down at me.

“Tamia do you love me?” He asks slowly sliding himself inside of me.

“Yes.” I whisper.

Grabbing both of my hands, he interlocks them with his and places them over my head. Looking down into my eyes, he begins to move deeply inside of me.

He lowers his head and kisses the bruise on my forehead.

“Am I hurting you?” He asks.

I shake my head no, then he captures my lips into a deep and loving kiss.

Without breaking our kiss, Kellen rolls to his back, putting me on top. I sit up straight and place my hands to his chest, then I begin grinding and rolling my hips against him.

“Fuck Tamia, just like that!”

Placing his hands on my hips, he guides my movements, while moving his hips beneath me, creating deeper penetration.

“Aaah!” I shout.

Flipping us over again, I land on my back and Kellen continues making love to me.

“You’re not leaving me tomorrow.” He says moving inside of me. “If you need rest, you can stay with me and I’ll take care of you. Just don’t go.”

“I.”

“You what Tamia?” He asks thrusting deeper inside of me. “I know what I want, and it’s you. Just let me love you Tamia. Would you let me do that?”

Unable to form words, I just nod my head yes. I slowly close my eyes and continue to enjoy all the things that Kellen was doing to my body.

“Open your eyes Tamia.”

I obey and I look up into his blue eyes.

“Can you to feel how much I love you, Tamia?”

“Kellen.” I moan his name. He continues to give me all kinds of pleasure that no one else has ever given to me, except for him. He repositions the lower half of my body, bringing one of my legs to rest on his shoulder. Rotating his hips, he begins to thrust harder inside of me.

A scream of pleasure escapes my lips, as uncontrolled tears run down the side of my face.

“Aaah Tamia!” He screams signaling his release.

Slowing his movements, he gently lays on top of me.

“I love you so fuckin’ much Tamia.” He says in the crook of my neck.

I run my hands along his sweaty back, hugging him closer to my body.

“I love you too Kellen.”

Epilogue

              “Tamia!”

I turn around to the sound of my mom’s voice.

“Mom!” I say giving her a hug.

“I’m so proud of you sweetheart!”

“Thanks mom.” I say pulling away from her embrace. I look over her shoulder and see my dad standing there with a proud look on his face.

“Come give your old man a big hug.” I walk around my mom and embrace my dad. “I’m very proud of you baby girl. Graduating from college is a huge accomplishment.”

I pull away and kiss my dad on his cheek. “Thanks dad. It wasn’t easy.”

“I know sweetheart, and since I know that, it makes me even more proud of you.”

“Tamia, Tamia, Tamia!”

I hear a little voice calling my name. I turn my attention away from my dad and see Chandler Winston running in my direction. As soon as he gets to me, he hugs my leg.

Laughing, I squat down and become eye level with the almost three year old. He’s looking at me with his big blue eyes that he and his dad both share, and stands there smiling at me.

“Where’s my hug and kiss?” I ask him.

Without hesitation he jumps in my arms and I begin kissing his little cheeks. Chandler pulls away and starts playing with my curls.

Looking at him I couldn’t believe this was the same little boy that Kellen fathered and took full custody of after Ashley decided that she wanted a full time modeling career, and agreed that Chandler should stay with Kellen. She called often to speak with Chandler, sent him cards, and would visit when she was in the area, but all and all Kellen took care of his son, and he was a damn good father.

In the beginning it was tough on both Kellen and I.  He was finishing up his senior year, while I had just started my junior year. After Ashley gave birth to Chandler, I hardly saw Kellen. When I did, it would be when he was coming in late from leaving Ashley’s sister’s apartment from visiting his son, or early in the morning when he left to go to class. Because we hardly saw each other and had lack of communication, I stopped staying at Kellen’s apartment all the time, and instead I went home every day to the apartment that Katie and I shared.  I remember the night Kellen showed up at my apartment angry and upset. He apologized several times for not being around, and not giving me the attention I needed. All he wanted was to be a good father to his son, but he also wanted me to be in his life.

I had to explain to him that it wasn’t all his fault, and that it wasn’t all about me, and that I had to understand that he had a son he had to be there for, and that I loved him and would be there for him no matter what. That same night after he made love to me, he asked me to move in with him. Four months later Kellen was awarded full custody of Chandler.

Kellen’s father eventually opened up an accounting firm fifteen minutes from the campus. As soon as Kellen graduated, he began working there. Just fresh out of college, he was doing great things for the firm. His dad was very pleased that he sold the firm located in Destin, and moved closer, so that he and Kellen could run the new location together.

When Kellen was at work, I stayed home taking care of Chandler, and if I had class Mrs. Winston, Katie, or Tasha would come by to help. Even though Chandler wasn’t biologically mine, I loved him as if he were my own.

“We were wondering where you ran off to Chandler.”             

I look up and see Mr. and Mrs. Winston walking towards us.

“I wanted to see Tamia!” Chandler whined.

“We want to see her too young man, but next time wait on us.” Mrs. Winston says tickling Chandler. Turning her attention to me, she smiles and gives me a big hug. “Congrats Tamia!”

“Thank you.”

She looks at me with a sad expression on her face. “I wish Kellen could have made it. He called and said his flight was delayed due to bad weather in Texas. If it makes you feel any better, you can blame it on Mr. Winston. He’s the one who sent him there a week before graduation.”

“How many times do I have to apologize?” Mr. Winston spoke up. Kellen wanted to go, plus he was more familiar with the accounts.”

“I forgive you.” I say giving him a hug.

“Where are your parents?” Mrs. Winston asked. “I have so much to tell Gail. I haven’t seen her since Chandler’s first birthday.” She says scanning the auditorium.

“They’re over there talking Jay’s head off.” I respond.

“Come on honey.” She says pulling Mr. Winston’s hand. “Chandler are you coming with me and grandpa, or are you staying with Tamia?”

“Tamia!” He says clutching my hand.

“Okay. Behave and we’ll see you two at the graduation reception.”

“Okay grand mommy.” He says waving.

We both stand there, watching them walk away.

“Chandler, how about we find Aunt Katie, then we’ll head to the reception. Sound like a plan?”

“Yes!” He screams cheerfully.

“Okay.” I say ruffling his hair. “Let’s go find her!”

~ ~ ~

I look at my phone for the thousandth time that night to see if I missed a call from Kellen. Still no call, so I put my phone back into my purse.

“Tamia it’s your turn.” Katie says taking a seat next to me. “Chandler is wearing me out on the dance floor. He acts like this is his party! I would ask Tasha to take over, but she and Tyson left an hour ago.”

I laugh and shake my head. Chandler did have a lot of energy. I get out of my chair and make my way to Chandler, who was the only one at the moment dancing. I grab his little hands and we begin dancing together. A minute into our dance, the music changes to something slow. I pick Chandler up and hold him in my arms. He lays his head on my shoulder, and I begin rocking to the slow beat of the music. Eventually he falls asleep in my arms, but I continue to dance. I close my eyes briefly until I feel someone trying to take him out my arms. When I open my eyes I see my mom.

“Mom I have him. You don’t have to.”

She smiles and takes him out my arms, and walks away.  I stand there confused until, I feel someone wrapping their arms around my waist.

“Dance with me.” They whisper in my ear, then their lips touch my neck.

“Kellen?” I turn around and find him standing there.

“Hey baby.” He says to me, then gently kisses me on the lips. “Sorry I missed your graduation.” He whispers against my lips, then he kisses me again, allowing his tongue to enter my mouth briefly before pulling away. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“I missed you too. So very much. I’m glad you made it back when you did.”

“I am too.” He says staring down at me. “Let’s get out of here. I have something I want to show you.”

“Now? You just got here.”

“Yes. Now.”

“Okay do you want me to get Chandler?”

“No our parents have him. Let’s go.” He interlocks our fingers, then we leave the reception.

~ ~ ~

As soon as I get into Kellen’s BMW SUV, he tells me to close my eyes, and to keep them closed until he tells me to open them. When we make it to our destination, he helps me out the SUV, and guides me in the intended direction. We walk up several steps, then I hear keys jingling. A door opens and we walk in. As soon as the door closes, Kellen grabs me by my hips.

“Open your eyes Tamia.”

I open my eyes and when I do, I can tell we’re inside a house.

“Before you ask any questions, I want us to look around.”

“Okay.” I respond.

He grabs my hand and begins showing me around. We start upstairs and work our way down. The house was furnished, and had four bedrooms, three bathrooms, a huge kitchen, nice backyard, and it was very spacious.

“What do you think?” He asks walking us into the living room.              

“It’s beautiful Kellen. Does this house belong to a client?” I ask looking around the living room.

“No.” He responds in a low voice.

I look at Kellen and he looks nervous.

“Are you okay?”

He doesn’t respond, just looks at me.

“Kellen, you’re scaring me.”

“I’m not trying to.” He says reaching out to me, bringing me closer to him. Gently touching my face, Kellen continues to look into my eyes. “Tamia. Baby I love you so very much.”

“I love you too.” I say searching his face. “Baby talk to me. You look nervous.”

“I am.” He admits, taking a deep breath. “Tamia, during the week I was gone for business, I was also finalizing the details on our house.”

“Our house? This is our house?” I ask confused.

“It will be once you say yes.”

“Yes to what, Kellen?”

“To becoming my wife.” He says getting on his knees. “I can’t see myself without you Tamia. You’ve been nothing but wonderful. When we found out that Ashley was pregnant with my son, you could have left me then, but you didn’t and stayed by my side. I know you love Chandler as if he were your own, and I love you even more for that.”

I stand there speechless with tears in my eyes.

“Baby.” Kellen says running his hands up my bare legs, reaching the hem of my dress he lifts it up until he’s exposing my stomach. He leans forward and places several kisses on my stomach. “I’m looking forward to the day you’ll tell me that you’re pregnant with our first child. You’re going to be a great mom, and I’m sure Chandler can vouch for that.”

I wipe my eyes and wait for Kellen to continue.

“Tamia our relationship has had its ups and downs, and we didn’t let them get in our way because we love each other.” Reaching into his pants pocket he pulls out a ring box. “Baby I want you to grant my wish, and be my wife. Tamia will you marry me?” He opens the box revealing a beautiful white diamond ring.

“Yes!” I say with tears streaming down my cheeks.

Kellen grabs my left hand and slides the ring on my finger. He stands and grabs my face and captures my lips in a kiss. “I want to celebrate.” He says sucking on my lips.

“What do you have in mind?” I ask breathless.

“Well soon to be Mrs. Winston, I haven’t tasted or made love to you in about a week. Do you think you can help me with that?” He asks removing his shirt.

Licking my lips, I look at my soon to be husband. “I think I know exactly what you need to help with your problem.”