Wanted (6 page)

He gently placed two fingers under my chin and raised my face to look at him. I felt the familiar warmth radiate from where his touch grazed my skin. Damn him and his dark green eyes.

“It’s not just your power, Ash.” He spoke soft and firm.

I swallowed. He’d never called me just Ash before. It sounded sweet and familiar coming from his mouth. I tried in vain to not think about what it was like to kiss that mouth, or at least be kissed by that mouth.

I shook my head, stubborn. “I don’t know for sure. All evidence points to the negative on that point.”

“I’ll have to convince you.” He smiled slightly.

“You have a girlfriend,” I said stupidly, just now remembering Victoria. Matt and Cora stood by the pool table, watching us.

“I broke up with Victoria yesterday,” Conor replied.

Oh. Huh, how about that? I had no more excuses. I stared blankly. Conor moved to leave. I stood and followed him, zombie-like. As we approached Matt and Cora, Matt moved to me and I automatically wrapped my arms around his waist, letting his familiar scent calm me. His shirt felt rough against my cheek as he held me to him tightly.

He laid his face on my hair.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. His hands smoothed down my back once before he let me go.

Cora took my hand in hers in a show of solidarity. She was with me on this. For that, I was grateful, happy there was someone in my life who wasn’t trying to be the one to own me. Conor stood at the door, his shining eyes boring into me. Matt walked past his friend, opened the door, and walked into the night.

“One week,” Conor whispered before he too melded into the shadows.

Cora and I didn’t sleep. We sat up and talked. I may have cried some. We discussed my options. We even threw around the idea of running away. Though we figured if my power was as strong as Matt and Conor claimed, then no matter where we went vamps would be attracted to it. Besides, I was planning on going to college. I still wanted some normalcy in my life. We decided I would have to choose between Matt and Conor. There was no way I could let someone I didn’t know bite me.

Did I pick Matt, who was my friend, my savior, my rock? Matt, who Cora thought may be just a little bit in love with me.

“Matt? No way. I thought he was trying to start something with that Megan chick,” I protested.

Cora rolled her eyes. “You only think that because you’ve been so hung up on your obsession with Conor. Girl, you should see the way Matt looks at you.”

I shivered. I did not want Matt to like me that way, did not want to break his heart, and I just could not see him as anything more than a brother. “So should I let Conor try to convince me?” I wanted to stay as far away from the subject of Matt liking me as possible.

Cora answered with a giggle. “It could be fun,” she pointed out.

I sighed. I just didn’t know; no easy answer presented itself to me. We continued talking until her mom called us upstairs for breakfast. Even the waffles didn’t help me be any surer of what to do.

I was exhausted from not sleeping the night before. All I wanted to do was get home and crawl into bed and pretend none of this was really happening. I showered at Cora’s and she drove me home. Funny, after talking all night, we were oddly silent on the ride to my house. I just kept thinking of the two boys now in my life. Cora was letting me come to my decision without any added pressure from her. As I moved to exit the car at my house, I muttered, “Thanks.”

She put a hand on my arm. “Hey. I totally got your back, okay? I’m here for you. In any way you need me. I can even be there for…” She looked at my throat. “Whatever you need,” she finished lamely.

I understood her unspoken offer. She would be there for me up to and after the deed was done. I repressed a shudder just thinking about the biting, but my heart filled with gratitude for her offer. Again, I was reminded she was the only one of my friends right now who didn’t want anything from me.

“Thanks, honey.” I leaned in and hugged her. I gave her a grateful smile as I gathered my stuff and got out.

My house was empty, my family probably at church. Yes, witches in church sounded funny, but my parents were pretty strong Catholics. Go figure. I trudged up the stairs, overwhelmed with a sense of loneliness. Cora said she’d be there for me, and I knew she would. In the end, though, the decision was mine to make, mine alone. And I would be the one who would have to endure the whole being a vampire’s familiar thing; being bitten every few days, my power at the disposal of my protector, for him to use, possibly a pawn of the Council by extension.

I dropped my bag just inside the door to my room and dug out my phone. No messages. Maybe the boys were wisely giving me today to digest everything before they started trying to convince me to choose one over the other. I shoved my phone in my pocket and flopped facedown on my bed, not even bothering to take off my shoes. Soon, I sunk blissfully into the oblivion of sleep.

* * * *

The sound of the doorbell woke me. I rolled over and rubbed at my eyes. Dusky red light shone through my window. Had I really slept all day? Groggy, I sat up and wondered if the doorbell had been a dream. My mom’s voice drifted upstairs as the front door closed. I blinked the sleep out of my eyes, left my room to see who was here, and met my mom on the stairs.

“Oh, Ashlinn, you’re awake.” She walked to the bottom with me and glanced toward the foyer. “You have a visitor.”

She frowned at me, but I didn’t know what she was thinking. She turned left and went into the kitchen. Intrigued, I walked through the living room to the front door.

Goddess, Conor looked amazing in my house. He stood in my foyer, hands stuffed into the pockets of his dark, ripped jeans. A soft gray T-shirt hugged his arms, emphasizing the muscles there. He wasn’t hugely muscled, just lean and strong, and oh so sexy.

My breath hitched and my steps slowed. He’d heard me coming and looked up, giving me a shy grin. Shy? When had Conor ever been unsure of himself?

“Hey,” he said. Wary of his motives, I stopped a few feet from him, crossing my arms. I had thought he was going to give me today; yet here he was in my house, looking completely hot. So not fair.

“Hey, yourself.” I grinned a little in spite of my misgivings. I couldn’t help my strong reaction to him. My heart raced. I realized it wasn’t because I was nervous. I had the power here. He wanted something from me and it was my decision whether I would give it to him.

His dark hair was mussed, like he’d just rolled out of bed. Oh, wait. That was me. My hand flew to my hair. Damn. I wondered what I looked like. Before I could panic, his voice calmed me.

“You probably didn’t sleep much last night, huh?”

“Not really,” I admitted.

He nodded and looked off into the living room. “Me neither.”

I scoffed, “Wow. You must want power pretty badly, huh?”

His head snapped back. “What? No. I…” His gaze focused over my shoulder, toward the kitchen.

He cleared his throat and tried again. “Can we go for a drive, maybe?”

I glanced backward, figuring my parents or sister must not be far off. His vamp senses could probably pick them up. He wanted us to be able to talk in private. I sighed, but acquiesced.

“Okay. Just a minute.” I hustled to the kitchen. “Ma, Dad, I’m going out for a while with Conor, okay?”

My mom looked up from stirring something on the stove, her eyebrows drawn together in concern. “Don’t be long. Dinner’s almost ready.” She looked past me, as if she could see Conor. I supposed she probably could sense what he was. My mom was pretty powerful herself. I wondered why she didn’t have problems with vamps. “Will Conor,” she said his name pointedly, “be staying for dinner?”

How awkward would that be? I imagined the dinner conversation. “Mom, Dad, Conor here wants me to be his familiar.” No thanks. I’d save that talk for a later date.

“Um, no.”

“He’s cute,” my little sister, Gabby, whispered, and then giggled.

I rolled my eyes and made to leave the kitchen. “I’ll be back.”

In the driveway sat a big, black SUV. Conor moved ahead and opened the door for me, waiting until I was buckled up to close it and move around to the driver’s side. What a gentleman, when he wasn’t trying to sink his teeth in my jugular.

As he pulled into the street, he glanced over at me. “Thanks for coming with me, for giving me some time today with you.”

I shrugged, trying to remain nonchalant. Fact was, his car smelled like leather, new car, and Conor. His scent was everywhere, surrounding me, enveloping me, and it was amazing. Woodsy and manly, it made my stomach flutter and knees tingle. I was trying not to breathe too deeply and stared out my window, so I didn’t have to look at His Hotness.

He made a sound like a cough drawing my attention. “To answer your sort of question. No, I do not want power that badly. That’s not why I’m here.”

I dropped my gaze to study my hands in my lap. “Why?” I said, just above a whisper. “Why do I feel like you’re torturing me?”

He chuckled. “I didn’t know I was so bad. Sorry.” He sighed. “I’m just trying to get to know you, let you get to know me.” His voice was resigned. “You have a week. I’ve scared you, made you uncomfortable, and upset you. I’m trying to prove to you I’m not a bad guy.”

I looked at his profile, his strong jaw and chin. His nose was a little too straight, a little too big. Those emerald eyes shone above high, chiseled cheekbones.

“Why?” I repeated. “If it’s not just the power, like you say, then why do you care so much what I think?”

His grip on the steering wheel tightened briefly. “Because, I figure you will choose either Matt or me. I also figure you’re smart enough to begin to realize Matt may be—may like you more than a friend.”

I shifted uncomfortably. Did everyone know this except me?

“And,” I prodded, not wanting to dwell on Matt’s feelings for me.

“And,” he continued. “I know you won’t want to risk breaking his heart by becoming his familiar. You care too much about him.”

Wow. How did Conor know me so well?

He shrugged. “So, that leaves me. I really haven’t given you any reason to trust me, or even like me. I’ve actually done the opposite. So I’m trying to make up for the crap I put you through.” He fell silent, and studied the road.

I wanted to believe him, I did. I really wanted to trust him. If I was being totally honest, I really wanted to kiss him again.

“You know, being a familiar doesn’t necessarily mean I have to be the girlfriend, too. I could pick Matt. I already trust him and I’m comfortable with him. He makes me feel safe and protected already. Being his familiar isn’t much more of a step.”

“Yes,” he conceded. “But the bond is such an intimate one, familiars often become consorts as well.” There he was, talking all formal again. I knew his point already; I’d thought about it myself. “Matt may expect more from you if you entered into a bond with him.”

I bristled. “Matt wouldn’t expect anything from me that I wasn’t willing to give.” I defended my friend and took a jab at Conor. It worked. He squirmed.

“Maybe,” was his only response.

I felt sure Matt wouldn’t try to push romance on me, yet I couldn’t help but wonder if what Conor said was true. Even if Matt didn’t try and force me to love him in a more-than-friends kind of way, I might end up hurting him.

“Does that mean you want to be my boyfriend as well as my vamp protector?” I tried for boldness, watching his face for a response.

He never took his eyes off the road, his lips curved upward slightly, and I swore he blushed a little. “I think I ruined my chances for more.” His gaze fell on me briefly before refocusing on the road ahead.

He hadn’t really answered the question. Did he want to be with me? I really didn’t want to push. “But you’re trying to convince me to trust you?”

He nodded. I sighed and steeled myself.

“Conor, I won’t be used by you or anyone. I don’t care how hot you are.” His mouth twitched. I kept going. “If I do this, it’s going to be on my terms. You never talked to me before the other day. Now all of a sudden you want me to be your familiar? I’m wary…and nervous…and confused. This is not how I envisioned my life, my future. This decision is huge. I mean, what if the more time you spend with me, the more you realize you don’t like me? What if I start to annoy you? I know I’m not much to look at, so I’m relying on personality here. If you end up thinking I’m annoying or something, then it’s just my power—and that would suck for me.”

Conor shook his head and uttered a sound of disbelief.

“What?” I asked.

He looked at me, eyebrows knit together. “Who said you were unattractive?”

I shrugged. “No one, specifically, I guess. I’m just, not…Victoria.” I gnawed a little on my lower lip. It wasn’t like guys were lining up, asking me on dates. I’d had a boyfriend or two throughout high school, no one special.

“You don’t have to look like Victoria to be attractive, Ashlinn.” He arched an eyebrow at me. “You are pretty. Do you think I kiss unattractive girls?” His grin was cocky.

I rolled my eyes. “You would if you wanted their power.”

He put a hand to his heart as if I’d wounded him. “Ouch! Is that really what you think of me?”

I paused. I hadn’t really, but when I thought about it, it was exactly what worried me. “The jury’s still out on that one, I guess.”

He nodded, tight-lipped. “Thus, why I need to prove to you that’s not who I am.”

Wait, he’d said I was pretty. He thought I was pretty? My mouth pulled into a grin.

He saw and raised his eyebrows in question.

“What?” he asked, now looking between me and the road.

I flushed. “You said I was pretty,” I replied softly.

He rolled his eyes, looking very un-Conor-like. “Hasn’t anyone told you you were pretty?”

I shook my head. My parents really didn’t count.

“Well, you are.”

I didn’t know what to say. Coming from Conor, the compliment warmed me to my toes and set my face afire. “Pssh. You’ll say anything now,” I joked. “Anything to butter me up.” I laughed, even as I wondered if he was telling the truth.