Walk (Gentry Boys) (22 page)

Yet how could I in good conscience keep this kind of a secret from Stone? 

As I sorted through every word I remembered coming from Conway I realized he’d intentionally told me very little.  He’d mentioned that he didn’t live up in Scottsdale but gave no hint about where he
did
live.  He’d obviously been keeping quiet tabs on his brother if he knew where Stone’s apartment was but it didn’t seem like he had any interest in encountering him. 

The only time I really got a peek into his conflicted soul was that brief moment when he’d let his guard down and admitted he’d read Stone’s letters.  In that moment there’d been such anguish in his face and I’d glimpsed the lost boy Stone always spoke of.  I’d glimpsed it before the hardened man returned. 

I fell asleep without reaching any meaningful conclusions and woke up to the feel of a hand unzipping my dress. 

“Stone,” I sighed, dreamily reaching for him.  He’d already dropped his clothes and was climbing into bed in the darkness. 

“Missed you, honey,” he said as he settled on top of me. 

I was going to say something else but his mouth covered mine and ended conversation for the moment.  After we’d exhausted each other he fell asleep with his arms around me.  I, on the other hand, stayed awake a while yet, staring into the absolute darkness and hearing the echo of words that had one clear, terrible meaning. 

“If you love Stone, you’ll keep him away.” 

STONE

“You’re quiet,” I observed, taking her hand. 

She tried to smile but couldn’t quite get there.  I didn’t understand.  We’d had such a great afternoon; hiking in the Superstition Mountains, enjoying the pleasant air of mid autumn and just reveling in a rare day that we were both off from work. 

Evie was especially bad at keeping her feelings a secret and now that we were sitting down at a table with nothing but our plates of hamburgers to distract us she looked downright anxious.  I wasn’t used to this, doing all the talking. 

“Something wrong?” I prodded. 

She chewed her lip and looked out toward the parking lot.  I thought of the first time we’d come here, after the barbecue at Cord’s house.  There were a lot of things wrapped up in that day; the pleasure in being free and among family, the agony of Conway’s rejection, the happiness in getting to know a beautiful kindred spirit. 

“I think it might rain,” she frowned.  “See those clouds in the east?”

“That what’s bothering you?  The rain?”

“No.”  She squeezed my hand.  “I’m sorry.  I guess I’ve been daydreaming.” 

She perked up as we finished our food and took off.  I kept my hand on her knee as I drove to her place.  Evie said poetic things about the beauty of the Superstitions and told me some stories I’d never heard about lost gold mines and buried treasure. 

“Nobody knows how many lost their lives up there, searching for the mine.  You know, just a few years ago a man traveled here from Vancouver, saying he’d been to an estate sale and coincidentally found a map that showed the location of the original mine.  He tried to interest the local media but they paid him no mind, until he disappeared somewhere up there.  Then he became big news, especially when some local hikers found his bleached skull six months later.  Legend says the mine is and has always been guarded by those who would kill to protect it.”

“That’s morbid,” I said as I swung into a parking spot in front of my apartment.  

“Just a story,” she said vaguely.  “Kind of like how there’s some cult that claims a bunch of space aliens live in the shadow of Weaver’s Needle.”

I scanned the sky.  “You know, I think you’re right.  It might rain.” 

Bash was nowhere in sight, but then it was Sunday so he was likely on grandma duty.  We’d stayed here last night and even though I’d driven her back to her apartment this morning so she could change into hiking clothes, her red pickup truck was still parked right out in front of my apartment.  Odd thing was, I didn’t recall seeing it there when I’d gotten in last night, although it must have been because she wouldn’t have left my bed in the middle of the night to move it. 

Even though I wasn’t too keen on television, Evie had a collection of shows that she regularly watched.  We settled on the couch with a bowl of popcorn as she cheerfully flipped to one that had a complicated story line involving dragons and kings and ice zombies, where everyone who lived in their imaginary world spoke with a curious British accent.

I didn’t understand half of what was going on but I didn’t want to bug her with questions, so I just relaxed and endured the hour. I entertained myself with the view down Evie’s shirt as she stretched out beside me. 

“I love that show,” she said happily as the credits rolled.  

I tickled her.  “What else do you love?”

“You,” she giggled. 

“Then say it.” 

She sat up on her knees and looked at me gravely.  “I love you, Stone.” 

“I’ll never get tired of hearing that.”

She linked her fingers through mine.  “Then I’ll say it again.  I love you.” 

I kissed her.  I pulled her into my lap and pried her lips open with my tongue while she softened against my body and let me explore her mouth.  I was just about to get serious and carry her into the bedroom when she pulled away. 

“You too tired?”  I ran my hand through her hair.  It was thick and soft.  It always felt good on my fingers.  Or tickling my chest.  Or fanned out over my thighs. 

I was such a dirty bastard. 

“I’m not tired,” she said but she had the look again, the semi-anxious look that she’d been struggling with on and off all day. 

She tapped her foot and looked away.  I got the impression she was picking through words in her head.  Then suddenly she craned her neck, trying to peer outside.

“You hear that?” 

“Yup. It’s raining after all.” 

Evie jumped off the couch and headed for the door.  She took such absurd glee in simple things like rain.  It wasn’t storm season so these showers had kind of come out of nowhere.  If I paid closer attention to things like droughts and reservoir levels then I’d probably say something about how much we needed the rain in the valley.  In fact now that I was thinking about it, the last time I remembered rain falling was the day I went to Evie’s apartment to apologize for my bad behavior.  I’d apologized, and then I’d made her mine. 

I followed her outside where she stood just under the stairwell roof and held her hand out to catch a few drops.  It was a light rain, a clean rain.  It wouldn’t last long but the rain hitting all the desert creosote would make the entire valley smell sweet for a little while. 

We were still standing out there when Evie’s bitchy friend, Darcy, came running over with bags of groceries in her hands.  So far I liked Darcy as much as I liked poison ivy but she was Evie’s friend and I wanted to be a good guy so I took her bags and carried them to her apartment. 

“You can set them down right there,” Darcy said imperiously as she pointed to a glass top kitchen table. 

Evie had quietly followed me into Darcy’s apartment.  The girl had crappy taste; there were purple shag throw rugs everywhere and the place smelled like moldy cat litter, even though Darcy’s roommate had moved out months ago, taking her cat with her. 

“You guys want coffee?” Darcy asked as she flipped a Keurig machine on. 

“No, but thank you,” I said, trying to catch Evie’s eye in the hopes we could get out of here. 

Darcy spun around suddenly.  “That was wild last night,” she said and strangely she seemed to be speaking to me. 

I gave her what must have been a totally blank look because I didn’t know what the hell had been wild about last night. Evie had just briefly mentioned that they’d gone out to some Scottsdale club, watched other people dance for an hour and left.  Uneventful evening all around.  Nothing that would earn the ‘wild’ label. 

“I meant running into your brother,” Darcy explained with a roll of her eyes like I was an idiot for not catching on. 

Immediately I looked at Evie.  Her face was rapidly turning red and she gripped the back of a kitchen chair. 

“Stone,” she started to say. 

“What about my brother?” I asked quietly.  “What about Conway?”

It couldn’t be true.  Evie knew I’d been searching high and low for any hint about where I might find Con these days.  She wouldn’t have spent the whole day in my presence without saying, “Oh by the way, you know that brother of yours?  Yeah, I saw him last night.” 

“Uh-oh,” Darcy giggled.  “Is that a sore subject?  Evie, you didn’t tell me.  Sorry.” 

She looked like she was the opposite of sorry. 

I walked right out of there and didn’t stop moving until I was back in my own living room.  I could feel Evie right behind me but she didn’t say another word until she closed the door at her back.  Then she came up behind me and touched my arm. 

“All day I’ve been thinking about what to say to you.” 

“You’re a talkative girl, Evie.  You couldn’t manage to string together a few simple words to let me know you caught a glimpse of my brother?” 

She sank down on the couch with a sigh.  “I didn’t just catch a glimpse of him, Stone.” 

“What?  You fucking talked to him?”

“Please sit down,” she pleaded. 

I sat. 

Evie pushed her hair behind her ears and stared at her empty lap like it held a script she could read from. 

“I talked to him,” she said quietly.  “And he talked to me.” 

She took a deep breath before explaining how her truck had gotten towed and some creep had made a move on them in the dark when out of the shadows came Conway the Superhero.  He saved the day and drove them home and even managed to get Evie’s truck from the clutches of its impound lot captors before arranging for it to be delivered before dawn. 

I had a million questions and yet I could say nothing.  Evie watched me with apprehension. 

“I’m sorry,” she blurted and unlike her friend she looked very sorry indeed.  “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. All day I’ve been trying to figure out how.” 

I didn’t budge when she touched me.  “Where was this club?”

“North Scottsdale Road.  Not too far from the mall.  He said it wasn’t his neighborhood though.”

“What
is
his neighborhood?”

“I don’t know.” 

I glared at her.  She crumbled. 

“I swear I don’t know, Stone.  He was very…cold.  Almost scary.  He knew where you lived.  He’s known all along.  But he got angry when I tried to get him to wait for you.” 

“What else?”

She hung her head.  “That’s all.” 

“Evie.” 

She winced.  “I yelled at him.  I told him he should stop running and face you.  I told him it was terrible that he never went to see you, that he never read your letters.” 

I inhaled.  I exhaled.  “And?”

“He got quiet,” she whispered.  “He said he had read your letters.  In the next breath he was angry again and I just wanted to get away from him.” 

I didn’t really like the sound of that.  “Did Conway threaten you or something?”

“No.” She shook her head.  “No, he just told me to get the hell out of his car.  He didn’t threaten
me
.” 

I caught on to the emphasis on the last word. 

“Who did he threaten?”

She didn’t want to tell me the next part.  She thought about it for a minute and then sighed because Evie was incapable of being artificial.  “He said that if I loved you then I needed to keep you away.  He made it sound like something would happen to you otherwise.” 

I wasn’t surprised.  It was the same vague threat he’d tossed my way at Cord’s house. 

Evie reached for my shoulder.  I didn’t yield one bit under her gentle touch. 

“It doesn’t make a damn bit of difference,” I said coldly. 

It didn’t.  I wasn’t going to stop hunting for Conway, trying to find a way to reach him. Not even if he held a gun to my forehead.  I had a promise to keep. 

  Evie spoke slowly.  “Stone.  I think he meant it.  He doesn’t want to see you.  And he’s going to end up hurting you if you keep trying to see him.”

I didn’t answer her. 

“Please,” she started to say but I turned on her. 

“Please
what
?” I snarled. “Please forget that I have a brother who’s destroying himself?  Please forget that I have a brother at all?  Is that what you’ve managed to do with Macon?”

It was a dirty thing to say.  Evie gasped as if I’d slapped her and I felt like a piece of shit. 

“Baby,” I said, trying to hold her. 

She pushed me away and stood up.  She paced across the living floor, breathing hard, while I sat and watched. 

I hadn’t meant to bring up Macon.  Evie’s twin brother wasn’t someone she talked about too often.  While I always found comfort in telling her long stories about my childhood with Con, she rarely mentioned anything about Macon and the past.  From what little she had told me about their early years they’d been very close, very happy. 

Everyone deals with grief in their own way.  The more I talked about Con the easier it was to persuade myself that he wasn’t really out of my life.  Perhaps that’s why I wrote him so many letters. 
So many letters
.  Two hundred and sixty four altogether.  I knew the number because when you’re locked up there’s not much to do except keep track of things like the number of unanswered letters you’ve written.  Where were they now, all those letters?

I waited, wordless, for Evie to stop pacing.  Eventually she did.  When she looked me in the eye again she was calm.

“A friend told me something once,” she said. “I wasn’t sure how to feel about it at first but now I think I know what he meant.  He said you can’t always keep trying to save someone if it means you’re losing yourself.  He said sometimes you have to let go.” 

That might work for some people.  It wouldn’t work for me.  The girl I loved was pleading with her eyes.  She was asking me to surrender a mission that might end up taking me from her. The last thing in the world I wanted was to cause her pain.  Evie was the light in a life that had been painful for far too long.  But she asked the impossible. 

Strength in brothers.

“I can’t,” I told her.  “I’ll never let go of Conway. Don’t ask me to, Evie.”   

She closed her eyes and lowered her head.  The rain fell harder.