Vengeance Bound (30 page)

See? We do have our benefits, dear.

The voice in my head gives me pause. It sounds . . . louder, somehow. I go into the bathroom to relieve the pressure on my bladder, and when I’m done, I examine my reflection in the chipped mirror behind the sink. There are deep shadows under my eyes, and my face looks haunted. My hair is frizzy. On either side of me I can see Their ghostly outlines, and Tisiphone waves at me happily.

“Go away,” I say.

Megaera frowns and strokes my hair. Fear trills through me at the tug on my scalp. I shouldn’t be able to feel Their touch.

Now, now. Why the long face?

Tisiphone picks up a length of my hair and twists it into a braid along the front of my hairline. She finger combs the snarls from my hair, and the curls magically smooth out into shining coils. I try not to flinch at the caress of her talons.

Someone’s been talking to Alekto. Poor dear. Our wretched sister must’ve unsettled you. Has she been spinning her lies again?

I swallow thickly. “Yeah, something like that.” They step away from me. Their smiles are strained, and fear sours my stomach. “So, are we going after Dr. Goodhart, or are we going to hang out here and do makeovers all night?”

They don’t move, and instead of giving in to my terror, I drive my fist into the mirror, cracking it. Anger They understand and respect. The pain is bracing, but fades too quickly. I look at my hand, the scrapes on my knuckles already fading away. A faint shimmering hovers above my arms, and I recognize the shape of the silver chains. Something
has
changed.

Alekto misunderstands.
Megaera hisses in my mind.
We don’t want control. We want a partnership. Don’t you want to belong, to have sisters?

Ah, so that’s the tactic They’re trying now. Instead of a hostile takeover, They want cooperation. They hope I’ll just give in and let Them turn me into a single-minded killing machine.

Sadly, it doesn’t sound like such a bad idea.

I’m so tired. I’ve lost Niko, and I can’t think about anything else right now. My heart is raw, and even thinking about him brings tears to my eyes. I can’t struggle against Them and try to get over Niko. I’m just not strong enough.

Plus, I want Goodhart dead. No mercy for the bastard.

“Of course I want sisters. Nothing would make me happier.”

They move close to me again, whispering platitudes and flattery, twisting my hair into some complex style of a civilization long gone. I close my eyes to block out the sight of Them, and to hide the frustrated tears that burn behind my eyes.

I’m not even strong enough to fight.

I don’t think I ever was.

NOT MUCH LEFT TO ANALYZE

I speed all the way back to my apartment, anxious to get Odie and get to Harrisburg to find Goodhart. I can see Them the entire time out of the corners of my eyes, and Their constant presence disturbs me. Somehow They’ve manifested of Their own accord, and no matter how much I try, I can’t grasp Them with my mind, let alone shove Them back into my subconscious.

I’m terrified, but I push my fear aside and just drive. Eventually I feel nothing, my terror numbing me and silencing the thoughts running through my mind. The only thoughts come from Their running dialogue.

The Furies urge me on with fevered whispers, cajoling me to pull over and start a massacre in every small town we pass through. They detail how much fun we could have injuring other motorists, and how many men we will punish once we are finished with Goodhart. There is an almost painful pressure behind my eyes as They blather on nonstop, Megaera in the passenger seat, Tisiphone behind me, her wings taking up the entire backseat. They both wear wide Joker-esque smiles, and I wonder if They are happier about Their freedom or the impending killing.

The only good thing about having Them in the car is that the heat of Their presence completely negates the frigid air coming in through my broken back window.

When did I get so good at looking on the bright side?

It takes me only an hour to get back to my apartment from the roadside motel where I crashed. I trudge upstairs, dragging my feet up each step like it weighs a hundred pounds. Dread has settled on my shoulders like a wet blanket, and I’m not sure how to stop the impending disaster. There is no way this can go well. At some point They will figure out that I’m not exactly overjoyed at the thought of being Their pet.

First my cat, then everything else. One thing at a time or I’ll break.

I get to my door and rest my head against the jamb, gathering my thoughts. I’m so tired, exhaustion that goes bone-deep. Is this the physical toll for carting Them around? Will They burn through my life too fast, the price of Their presence my few allotted years on this planet? It might be preferable to the alternative, an eternity spent at Their bloody beck and call.

I push my key into the lock, open the door, slip inside, and close the door behind me. I move into the apartment, calling for Odie. A muted footfall echoes behind me, and I turn. A crawling sensation writhes over my exposed skin, like insects walking across my arms.

Goodhart stands in the doorway to my bedroom, Odie in his arms. “You know, I’ve never cared for cats. They simply don’t have the loyalty that dogs do. Did you know that cats will actually eat their owners after they die? Dogs will starve before they take a single bite of their beloved master.”

I will not show my fear. “You know you look like a B-movie villain, right?” Odie jumps down when he sees me and twines around my ankles. I bend down to scoop him up, ignoring the gun that Goodhart points at me. Well, this is new.

“What are you doing here?”

“I saw you and your little boyfriend in Harrisburg. Luckily, the librarian at the state archives is a friend of mine, and he handed over your information when he heard that you were a former patient of mine. Apparently, you seemed a little off to him.”

So said the guy who freaked when I asked to look at a book. I don’t say that, though. The doctor does have a gun pointed at my chest.

“So, you came here to kill me? Nice. By the way, you look great.”

He looks like hell. His eyes are shadowed and a little wild, the scar from Tisiphone’s talons making him look sinister. His blond hair has grayed too early, and his clothes are dirty and wrinkled, and the hand pointing the gun at me trembles. He looks as bad as I feel.

“Shut up, you stupid bitch. You’ve ruined me. Do you know how much money I lost when you escaped? For more than a year I invested in you, and then you ran.” He says it like he can’t believe a creature he cared for would turn on him. “And then you try to kill me, hunting me like some animal. I saved your life.”

“Funny, I don’t quite remember it that way. You used me as a guinea pig. And you killed my parents.” A flicker of surprise crosses his face, and I laugh. “Ohmigod, you thought I didn’t know? Who do you think They are?” I gesture over my shoulders, and he frowns.

“Who are you talking about? I don’t see anyone.”

I shrug. “My friends. You remember Them? Tisiphone did give you a memento last time we met,” I say, tapping my cheek.

His expression darkens. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. You did this. You’re sick, Amelie.”

I pause. What if he’s right? What if They’re all in my head? Fear makes me cold, and I clutch Odie close.

No. They’re real. They’re just waiting for me to take the offensive.

I adjust my weight, moving forward slightly so I can get in a good kick. Before I can make my move, Goodhart gives me a twisted smile. He levels the gun between my eyes, and a sliver of panic shreds my bravado. Where are They? He waves the gun at me. “It doesn’t matter. Soon you’ll be dead, and I’ll be able to live my life without looking over my shoulder.”

I bury my face in Odie’s fur, and inhale his kitty scent. A single awful thought crosses my mind, but I don’t want to consider it. I shake my head, and beam at Goodhart. “Okay.”

He gives me a confused look, and I go to the front door. I don’t want to die, not at all, but I have to admit that it probably is best all around if he kills me. If I die, They’ll lose Their tie to this world.

Or at least I hope so.

I open the door, Dr. Goodhart a nervous shadow behind me. “What are you doing?” he snaps, the gun waving in my direction.

I drop Odie on the other side of the door. He meows at me once before walking down the stairs. He’s finally getting his wish to go outside. I hope he remembers enough to survive until some Good Samaritan finds him.

I close the door softly and turn back to Dr. Goodhart. “I was letting my cat go. Now, we were discussing your killing me. You should probably do it soon, because I’m pretty sure They won’t like you taking away Their chance for freedom.”

“Who?” he snaps.

“Them.” I gesture, and he turns around to where They’ve manifested behind him. The serpent grabs him by the throat, and he drops his gun, the weapon clattering on the floor. Megaera throws him against the wall. He crashes into the drywall and cracks it. There goes my security deposit.

Dr. Goodhart groans and scrabbles away from Tisiphone, who’s advancing on him with deliberate steps. She smiles at him with a mouth full of pointed teeth.

“Don’t be afraid. This is only going to hurt a lot.” Her throaty voice makes the words an even greater mockery of his fear. She kicks him in the ribs, the whoosh of his exhaled breath audible throughout the room.

Megaera clucks. “Now, now, Sister. Don’t take all of the fun for yourself. This is Amelie’s vengeance. A deal’s a deal.”

Tisiphone pouts momentarily and then gives a languid shrug. “I suppose so. The first one didn’t really count, did it? After all, you didn’t even get a chance to touch him before we tore him apart.”

I blink, and something in the back of my mind clicks. There are a lot of memories I don’t want, too full of pain and fear for my mind to process. But there’s one that I need, and it floats to the top.

For the first time the memory of Roland Thomas’s death comes back to me. The hawk is right. Before, all I could remember was all the blood, but as I focus, the events of that day fall into place. I remember it now. The rage that had burned in my chest, propelling me up the stairs. Their voices crowding out all rational thought. Roland Thomas screaming in pain and fear while I stood rooted to my spot by the basement door. And then . . .

Running. Through the woods. Away from the pain, blood, and fear of that awful place. And Their voices calling after me, echoing through my mind.

We are sorry. We lost control. It has been so long . . .

We owe you.

Why couldn’t I remember everything before? It comes back to me in bits and pieces, along with the awful memories of Roland Thomas. The truth of it makes my breath hitch.

They altered the memory. They altered all of my thoughts. Because I was supposed to kill Roland Thomas. That was our deal. His death for my cooperation.

But I never killed him. They’ve been lying to me all this time.

It’s almost too much.

Rage at the memories of my mistreatment drives me to Goodhart’s side. He lies on the ground, moaning from Their brief assault. I twist his arm, a snap signaling when it breaks. His screams reverberate in the tiny apartment. I look him in the eye, fury boiling under my skin as he endures the pain.

“Why did you kill my parents?” I demand.

He blinks at me through a mask of pain. “They were going to pull you out of the study. I had a grant for an experimental drug, but the study called for a trauma survivor with possible multiple personality disorder. You were the only patient who qualified.”

“You killed my parents for a little bit of money?”

He coughs, blood frothing on his lips. “It was five million dollars. That is not a ‘little bit of money.’”

“How?” The pain of my parents’ loss starts to creep in, and Megaera rests her hand on my shoulder. They stand behind me, looking on proudly. When Goodhart doesn’t answer my question quickly enough, I twist his arm, waiting until his cries have subsided to ask again. “How?”

“A patient at Brighter Day. Marie Layton. You met her at Saint Dymphna’s.”

I remember the dark-haired girl the orderlies carried in, bruised and beaten. She wasn’t there very long, maybe a couple of months. When she left, Annie took her place.

The doctor coughs, and continues. “She got out, and cut the brake lines the morning your parents were supposed to come and pull you out of the program. Your father and I had talked about the shortcut they took through Monaghan Gap, and I knew there was a particularly steep hill that would work. It was just dumb luck that it was raining. No one even thought it was anything but an accident.”

It all makes sense now. Dumb luck. Just like it was dumb luck that I was in Saint Dymphna’s while Dr. Goodhart slowly poisoned the girl who’d killed my parents, my pretty dark-haired roommate with blood on her lips. Dumb luck that Roland Thomas followed me and not my friend Steph. It was dumb luck that had caused a much younger version of myself to waddle into a lake when no one was looking and made my cousin drown. Dumb luck that They were listening when I prayed for help.

There’s a lot of dumb fucking luck going around.

I look down at Dr. Goodhart and smile. I can feel Their excitement almost as though it’s my own.

But it’s not mine. It’s Theirs, and I’m tired of being everyone’s pawn. I don’t want to kill Dr. Goodhart. No matter how much he deserves it. Dumb luck or not.

“I guess it’s your lucky night,” I say. I still hold on to his arm, and I squeeze it one more time in a futile attempt to cause him as much hurt as he caused me.

I may not want him dead, but I can make sure he suffers.

Their outlines grow stronger on either side of me. He’s in too much agony to notice Them. The serpent looks at me and smiles. “Just kill him already.”

Megaera’s words are enough to break through the haze of my righteous fury. I drop the doctor’s arm, and he falls to the ground in a heap, sobbing and cradling the limb. I look at the serpent and at the winged woman, both standing in front of me. Something is wrong. I begin to shake as I realize what it is. The threefold vision is gone. Does that mean I no longer need Their help? Are we now equals?