Until Lilly (24 page)

“Vacuuming
,” I tell her, lifting the vacuum up.

“I know
. I was trying to take a nap when I heard you down here. What the hell is wrong with you?” Her hands go to her waist and she looks a little scary. “Austin is just a friend to Lilly, so you need to relax, and if you don’t want to relax and cleaning helps you decompress, or de-stress, or whatever the hell it is you’re doing, then take the vacuum upstairs and finish what you started,” she says, walking past me into the kitchen. I’m just finishing my vacuuming when Lilly comes into the room. She looks just the same as she did before—no happier, no sadder—so I guess that’s good.

“You vacuumed?”
she asks, looking around, then at the vacuum in my hand.

“Yes
,” I say defensively. “I know the kids are messy; I just wanted to help out.”

“O
ooo-kay.” She rolls her eyes. “I brought you a coffee and a cinnamon roll; they are both downstairs.”

“Thank you.” Ha
! She thought of me when she was out with Austin. She starts to walk away, but I snag her, bending her backwards and kissing her, possessing her mouth. When I right her, she looks at me and smiles before skipping away. The damn woman is going to make me lose my mind.

*~*~*

I’m dying. I take a deep breath; my lungs are on fire, along with the muscles in my legs. I’m pretty sure I’m dead already. I look ahead and see that Austin and Lil’s dad are about a quarter of a mile ahead of me. We’re hiking up the side of the mountain they said was great for hunting bears. Honestly, I don’t even want to see a bear in the wild, let alone get close enough to shoot it. “Hurry up there, son,” Lil’s dad calls back over his shoulder. I shake my head in disgust; I thought I was in good shape.

“I’m coming
,” I grumble, and glare when I see Austin look over his shoulder with a smirk on his face. He isn’t even sweating, which is strange considering he has as much hair on his body as a wild animal. After about twenty minutes, we get to the top of the mountain. The view is breathtaking. “This is amazing.”

“This is where I asked Lilly’s mom to marry me
,” Frank says, his eyes landing on me, his arms crossing over his chest.

“It’s a good spot
,” I tell him, looking out over the valley below.

“When are you going to ask my daughter to marry you?”  I look at him
, then over at Austin. My hand goes to my pocket where I have kept her ring since picking it up at the jewelers. I run my fingers over the metal before pulling it out of my pocket.

“I actually wanted to ask you for permission.” I hold the ring out in his direction. The ring
has three diamonds. They represent our past, present, and future. They’re wrapped in white gold, with the kids’ birthstones set in-between.

“I can’t believe she took you back
,” Austin says, looking at the ring, then me.

“I can’t believe it either
, but she’s mine, and I will take out anyone who stands in the way of us having a future.” I look directly at Austin; his eyes flare, but he doesn’t say anything.

“
You have my blessing,” Frank says. I look at him to see him smiling.

“Thank you
,” I reply, putting the ring back in my pocket.

“Where’s the box?” Austin
asks.

“
What?”

“The ring box
, where is it?”

“In the garbage.” I sigh. “I can’t have the box in my pocket
; it’s too obvious,” I say, running my fingers over the ring again. This is a new habit; touching it does something to calm me.

“How long have
you had it?

“
A little over a month,” I say, shrugging. I like having it with me. I don’t know when I’ll ask; I just have a feeling that when the time comes, I will know.

“It ain
’t burning a hole in your pocket?” Austin asks, looking at me curiously.

“Honestly
,” I shake my head, “yeah, but I want to make sure that she is ready before I ask her.”

“I know a spot she loves
,” Austin says, looking thoughtful. I’m not sure I would want to ask her to marry me at any location they used to go to together. He must read my face when the next words come out of his mouth.  “Childs Glacier. She loves it out there. And no, we never went there together,” Austin says, and I remember her telling me about that place, saying there wasn’t anywhere in the world more beautiful. I can even remember the pictures she had in her apartment when I first started dating her.

“I’m not sure when I’m going to ask her. I want it to be in the moment.” I look at Austin and
Frank, who both smile.

“Well
, if you want her to say yes, then you should be in the moment at Childs Glacier.”

“She will say yes
,” I say, not feeling so confident when I read the looks on their faces. “What?”

“When she was a little girl
, she told me she wanted her future husband to ask her to marry her at her favorite spot, just like I asked her mom to marry me at
her
favorite place.”

“I don’t know. I just keep thinking I will know when I’m supposed to ask her.” I sigh
, pulling the hat off my head.

“Bud,
just take her out to the glacier. If you don’t get the feeling when you’re there, then don’t ask her,” Austin says. I really don’t want to like this guy, but he makes it hard not to.

“I’ll think about it
,” I say, thinking over the idea.

“Al
l right.” Frank smiles and pats my back. “Enough of the women-talk, time to go find our bear.”

“Shit
,” I groan. “How the hell did I end up in this situation?” I look at Austin, who laughs.

“You need to man
-up,” Austin says, smiling. “We need to make a man out of you. Hunting is like coffee; it puts hair on your chest.”

“If that’s the case
, I think you need to quit drinking coffee and hunting.” I look him over, shaking my head. He looks like a bear.

“Jealous?”
he asks, pulling down the top of his shirt and showing off his chest hair.

“Fuck no.”

“Chicks love it.” He smiles, and I can’t help but laugh.

“What the hell are you two gossiping about? Get it together
; we’re burning daylight,” Frank yells. Austin looks at me and shrugs before taking off hiking again.

“You better be careful
, Austin, you could easily be confused with a bear,” I tell his back. His hand raises over his shoulder so he can flip me off. I start to jog so I’m not so far behind and pray we don’t see a bear.

Chapter 11

Lilly

I look out the window of the truck into the side-view mirror. The dirt road we’re driving on is creating a large dust cloud behind us. All along the side of the road is empty space with large mountains off in the distance. My mom and dad are keeping the kids for us for a few hours so that Cash and I can go out to Childs Glacier. There are two glaciers near where I grew up in Alaska: one is Childs, the other, Miles. Childs Glacier has been one of my favorite places to go and think since I was young. There is just something about looking at a natural wonder that has been around for thousands of years. Along with the beauty of it—the amazing glaring white and turquoise color that is woven throughout the ice, and the river running along the front of it—if you’re lucky, you can watch a piece of ice fall off into the water; the sound of thunder that fills the air when it happens is awe inspiring.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” Cash asks
, pulling my hand up to his mouth to kiss my fingers.

“Nothing.” I smile
, looking over at him.

“Are you sad that were leaving in a couple
of days?”

“Yes
and no.” I squeeze his hand. “I miss my parents, but I also miss home,” I tell him and see him smile.

“I miss home to
o, but I am gonna miss it here.” He puts my hand on his thigh with his on top of mine, his thumb running across the top. “This is someplace I could see myself living,” he says, and I laugh; he is only saying that because he has never gone through an Alaskan winter. “What’s so funny?”

“Honey
, in the winter, there are times it snows so badly that you can’t even open the front door. A couple of years ago, the National Guard had to come in and dig people out because there were fifteen feet of snow in some areas.” I watch as his eyes almost bug out of his head. “So, now do you want to move here?” I ask him.

“I think we will just have to find time to visit in the summer.”

“I thought so.” I smile.

“
What the hell is that?” Cash asks. My eyes go from him to the road, and I see a giant black blur in the middle of the road ahead of us.

“I don’t know
,” I mumble, squinting my eyes. The closer we get, the clearer the object in the middle of the road becomes.

“Is it an elk?” Cash asks
, and I shake my head no. I haven’t seen a wild moose up close for years, and this one is huge; the antlers alone look as big as the truck we’re traveling in.

“Slow down
,” I say, trying to breathe.

‘What?” Cash
asks, and I can see the moose take notice of us. I know we’re screwed unless we can get the truck turned around.

“Slow down
!” I repeat, this time shouting the words. Cash slams the brakes, making the truck skid on the gravel road. The moose, who had been standing in the middle of the road, has now started running towards us. In Alaska, wild moose can be very aggressive, especially the males. “Turn the truck around!” I yell as I watch the moose running at us.

“Holy shit.”

“Turn the truck around now!” I scream, seeing the moose running at full speed. Cash looks at me, then slams the truck in reverse. The truck backs off the road, the tail end hanging off the road, down into the ditch. I look out the side window, seeing that the moose is still coming towards us. He is now a lot closer, his head down, and his large antlers swinging back and forth. “Go, go, go!” I cry, listening to the tires as they try to catch the road, but by the sound, I can tell that all they’re hitting is air.

“Baby
, when I say, I need you to throw yourself back against the seat,” Cash says calmly.

“What?”

“Just do it…on three,” he says, his eyes on me. I nod, then he starts to count. The second he gets to three, I push myself backwards hard against the seat and feel the truck tip back. The tires hit the gravel, and the truck lunges forward. The only problem is now we’re heading right for the moose. “What the hell are you doing?” I scream, my hands going to my face to cover it.

“Shit
!” Cash yells. I feel the car jerk to the right, making me slide across my seat, we jerk to the left. And I wait to feel the impact from the moose running into us, but nothing comes. “We’re good, babe,” Cash says, and I remove my hands from my face. “Are you okay?” Cash asks, and I nod as his hand goes to the back of my neck where his fingers move in slow circles. A few minutes later, he pulls the car over, unbuckles my seatbelt, and then pulls me over into his lap. “Are you okay?” His hands and eyes run over my body.

“Yeah
, I’m good.” I wrap my arms around his shoulders, burying my face in his neck.

“We
’re not moving to Alaska.”

“Agreed
,” I say, breathing him in.

“I thought I was afraid of seeing a bear
; now I know I should have been afraid to see a damn moose.” He chuckles, and I feel the rumble against my cheek. I don’t know if it’s the near death experience or what, but I want…no, I
need
him. I feel my clit pulse and my mouth opens up on his neck. My tongue comes out, traveling up his neck to his ear, and I feel him grow hard under me. “Baby, what are you doing?” His voice is rough and goes right to my core, where I feel myself become wetter. His hand at my waist travels up my side so that his thumb is resting under my breast.

“Please
, touch me.” I move my mouth to his, where I bite his bottom lip, giving it a hard tug. “
Please
, touch me,” I beg as I watch his eyes flash. Then his hand is in my hair at the back of my head.

“You want me to touch you?”
he asks, pulling my face away from his. I nod and he tugs my hair again.

“Give me the words
, Lil.”

“
Yes, I want you to touch me,” I say barely above a whisper.