Unorthodox Therapy (27 page)

CHAPTER TWELVE

Thomas

I usually didn't give in to negative emotions or panic. I didn’t struggle to control my moods. Friends of mine had even accused me of being phlegmatic due to my lack of tantrums, temper outbursts or extreme psychological states.

But the moment Lina burst out in sobs as if she was wounded, the fear and regret suffocated me. Some might say my motivation was cruelty. The truth was I loved torturing her, causing her pain, watching her squirm in discomfort. To see her out of her element made my heart and cock throb and I reveled in our power exchange. When I witnessed her very real distress at the end of the scene, my initial fear quickly dissolved into an ache, as if her feelings had fused into mine. I was overwhelmed by the longing to protect her and make her come back to her normal self, to comfort and hug her. They were just as powerful as my usual sadism.

It was clear that I admired and cared for her. I was grateful for all the positive change Lina Riley had brought into my life, but was I also falling in love with her?

It wouldn’t be surprising, I thought while I carried her limp, soft body. She was cuddling against my chest like a kitten. Her barely audible protest that she could walk on her own was so typical of Lina. It eased the intense rhythm of my heart since her tears had woken up all of my self-doubt. I had put my previous subs through their paces. Never had I gotten such an extreme reaction, though. Lina was an experienced and confident lover. However, most men she'd been with wouldn't have known what to do with a woman like her even if she’d drawn them a map.

She’d turned out to be more than I was prepared for. I'd never back away from a challenge, but I'd have to be careful not to ruin it all. With a bit of luck, this could be my best relationship. It would be one hell of a difficult task. I had to train her not only to discipline those self-destructive urges but also to accept who she was.

I allowed myself to relax only when the hot water embraced our tangled bodies and Lina rested her head against my shoulder. She made me feel so elated with her presence, the warmth of her body, the softness of her curves and the memory of her earlier ferocious self. The confidence we'd find a way to make it work, to get over any barriers between us came back in full force. I kissed the top of her head and placed my fingers under her chin. Lina’s sparkling blue eyes were still glazed, though.

“Do you feel better, Lina?” My arms wrapped tightly around her body. She blinked a few times as if my words had suddenly woken her up. “I hope none of it was too much for you.”

I expected anger, accusations, bratty pouting, but I hadn't even dreamed of hearing the next words she said. Her voice was soaked with shame and pain I could feel as strongly as if they were mine.

“I'm sorry, Thomas.” She shivered and pressed her shaking body against my chest. Her eyelids fluttered nervously. “I don't know what happened to me. I... I never lose control like this. I'm not some hyper-emotional psycho who cries after sex.”

“Hey...” I cupped her chin and made her raise her eyes to meet mine. The hot water covered our sore, tired bodies. “Open your eyes.” She did as she was told and stared back at me with the shyness of an awkward schoolgirl. “Don't ever apologize for your natural reactions. I'm the one who should be sorry. I overstimulated you, but you were absolutely gorgeous in your reactions, Lina. As for the tears...” I kissed her lips and felt how she relaxed a little. “Such a sudden mood crash isn't unheard of. I told you all about sub drop. What we did tonight was really intense for me as well.”

She stared at me with curiosity.

“I thought it was a typical thing for you to boss girls around, spank them and forbid them to cum?”

“Well, I'm dominant in my sexual relationships, but it doesn't always work, not with every woman.” I had her sit with her back leaning against my chest, grabbed a bottle of body wash from the counter and squirted some of it onto her front. It was strange to see her so soft and compliant even if her sassy attitude was slowly coming back. It was safe to say Lina wasn’t traumatized by what I’d done to her. She was clearly comfortable with my arms around her. When my fingers ran down her nipples and chest, she let out a small moan and closed her eyes with a smile.

“Sometimes it gets super awkward and nothing close to what happened with us. Trust me, I'm just as shocked as you are. It usually takes me a lot longer to sync with someone.” I kissed her neck while lathering her breasts, stomach and thighs with a loofa.

“But you didn't unravel or act like a goddamned baby. You also didn’t behave like a complete whore.” Lina turned back to look at me with blushing cheeks. “I soaked your floor again, didn't I?” She covered her face with her hands. “I actually barged into your house and demanded that you fuck me right away. This is just... so disgraceful.”

I grabbed her wrists and pulled them down from her face, forcing her to look at me again.

“Listen. I don't know who those assholes were who made you feel so self-conscious about your sexuality, but let me tell you this.” My lips pressed to hers. “You should never feel that you sacrifice something by submitting to me, by showing me how much you love what I do to you. It was breathtaking to see you giving in to your raw desires, accepting the pain, reveling in it.” The glow flickered in Lina's eyes and she let out a small smile. “I'll never hold it against you.” I let go of her wrists and grinned at her. “I'm honored you chose to be filthy and wild with me.”

“I just... There’s more.” She turned around and lay on top of me, pressing her sensitive breasts against my chest. “I've never felt as out of control as I did this week. The thought of you fully consumed me. All my goals were about getting myself off. I can't afford to be weak, Thomas. The level of control you have over me is scary.”

“Why does it scare you so much?” I brushed a tress of wet hair behind her ear and ran my hand across the small of her waist, massaging her. “You're under pressure to run the show at ChaosTech Solutions the whole time. There's nothing shameful in the need to have the burden off your shoulders in your intimate hours.”

“Yes, I know. I did my homework. Clearly a lot of aggressive, ambitious executives, both men and women, have a submissive streak in the bedroom.” Lina stopped for a moment and looked away. “But what if I lose myself in this new role and it ends up costing me everything? I was desperate to be fucked last night, and I was literally ready to do anything. I don't want to make any bad decisions that could affect people's lives. Also...” Her bottom lip trembled and she dug her nails into her palms.

“Keep talking,” I reassured her and tangled my fingers with hers to stop her from leaving marks.

“Right now you want to control my sexuality and bad habits. What if tomorrow you decide you could take control of my company? What if I'm too stupid horny to fight you? I know we're only in this together for two months, but... two months is plenty of time.”

I kissed her again and tried to ignore the pain. Lina still planned to end it all. It was still too early, though.

“I think we're both tired and we'd better leave this conversation for tomorrow when our minds are clear. In the meantime, ask yourself this.” I poured some more body wash onto my palms and spread it over her reddened ass. “Would a weak woman endure all you've been through the past five days? I could tell you were on the edge many times, but you never faltered or disgraced yourself. Don't say anything now. Just think about it.”

Lina laid her head on my chest as I continued cleansing her body. Her eyes were closed and she kissed my neck several times. She could probably feel my accelerated heartbeat. Did she truly realize her incredible effect on me? The sexual, taboo longing I'd been harboring for my boss was turning into a much more powerful feeling. Lina was afraid of the effect our arrangement could have on her sanity and career, but I was the one who could walk out of this with a broken heart when she decided she no longer needed me.

Her next words echoed my growing fears.

“Maybe it's a bad idea for us to spend the entire night together. Aren't we getting too... intimate?”

I would have been devastated if I had to walk away from what we could have together. Still, the fear of rejection wouldn't stop me. It was too late to give up on her now.

“This whole experience is intimate, Lina. It wouldn't work if we didn't achieve a certain level of intimacy and trust.” I smoothed a piece of her hair back and uttered with great effort, “There's nothing I can do to stop you if you want to leave. I don't believe in coercion, but...” All the bad premonitions were clouding my mind so I pushed them away. She was still here with me and the present moment was all that mattered. “You will feel much better in the morning if you don't sleep alone tonight. Me too.”

Lina was silent for some time, avoiding my eyes, slowly recovering from the shock. Based on what I knew of her, she was also reconstructing her walls and barriers.

Patience, I repeated under my breath. Trust can't be taken. It has to be built.

Finally, Lina raised her head and gave me an untypical shy smile before she cuddled against my chest.

“Five more minutes.”

***

The sunbeams peeked through the blinds on my bedroom window and hit me straight in the eyes. I'd been in such a deep state of slumber that at first I couldn't make out what had happened the previous night. Then, Lina stirred in her sleep and pressed herself tighter against my body. Her bare nipples were already hardened and she muttered something while settling more comfortably on top of me. Each morning after was getting better. It would be easy to get used to the warmth of her skin, the arousing shape of her breasts and ass, the scent of her hair, the tight grip of her long arms around my waist. I removed the hair from her face and saw she was smiling in her dream.

This woman felt so perfect, as if her body had been designed to fit mine. She was shorter than me but with amazing, infinite legs whose ankles were tangled with my own. Lina wasn’t light as a feather by any means and she didn’t have a perfect hourglass figure without any extra weight, but her small imperfections and love handles made her more feminine to me.

I didn’t think someone so reserved and cerebral would be into cuddling or physical contact. Maybe it was because of the connection we were slowly building or because she was overwhelmed with kinky sex and psychological conditioning, but she didn't shy away from being close to me, accepting my affectionate care, or seeking the physical comfort I could offer her. It was unbelievable how she was able to sleep so deeply next to me, as if we had been lovers for years.

I brushed my thumb against her bottom lip and groaned slightly when her wet pussy ground against my morning erection. Naughty girl. After the intense pounding of yesterday, I was sure Lina would have trouble walking for the next few days. She wasn't awake and yet her body was primed, ready to be taken again, fueled by her natural lust and passion. One of these weekends, I'd tie her to my bed and keep her there the whole day.

How many orgasms could a minx like her have before she begged me to stop? The mental image of her reddened skin, swollen pussy lips, puckered asshole and tied limbs made my blood boil. Her sexy voice would call out my name. It would be even raspier after all the screams of pain and pleasure.

I was sure about one thing: I didn't want to lose her. I wished I could wake up next to her every day, which was shocking. Sex and female companionship were important to me but I needed my private time and space. I’d always got nervous when my previous girlfriends had stayed over for more than a few nights in a row.

For the first time, I wanted to share everything with someone else. Was it because of Lina’s elusive nature? What if one day, by some miracle, she made up her mind and chose to stay with me? Would I still want the tigress so much once she was tamed?

Luckily, she woke up and interrupted my confused thoughts before they made me spiral down into an anxiety attack. Lina blinked with sleepy eyes and yawned in an incredibly cute way. In that moment, she reminded me more of a small, cuddly kitten than an intimidating beast.

“Haven't you heard it’s creepy to stare at people while they sleep?” She blushed and covered her face again. “I must look like hell.”

“Don't tell me you're one of those women who gets up an hour earlier than their partner to put on makeup and get rid of their morning breath?” I teased her and played with a lock of her hair. Lina spread her fingers and shyly looked at me through them, just like a guilty child. The Daddy Dom /Little Girl dynamic wasn't really my fetish, but right then I was feeling quite protective.

“Don't hide.” I ran my lips to her ear and gently pushed her hands away. “I love looking at you. I love watching your emotions change. It’s so much fun trying to figure your thoughts out.”

“I'm not getting any younger, and in the morning–”

The protest died on her lips when I kissed her and rolled her over onto her back, placing my knee between her legs. Lina opened her mouth wider, allowing my tongue in spite of her self-consciousness. Maybe the best tactic was to keep her horny and on the edge the whole time. All her absurd fears and phobias would fade away. She winced as my knee came to contact with her clit, then gyrated her hips, grinding her crotch against me. These masochistic tendencies of hers kept surprising me. Her pussy must have been really raw and tender after last night. Shortly after we went to bed, Lina had begged me to fuck her again. I turned her down carefully. I didn’t want to give her more than we were both ready for. The night had been intense enough. She pouted a little and complained I was treating her with kid gloves, but she fell asleep immediately once her head fell onto my chest and I embraced her curvy body.