Undone (A Country Roads Novel) (37 page)

“If only it were that easy,” he said, pulling back to look at her. He gave her a sad, watery smile. “I love you, baby girl,” he said, reaching for her face and running his thumb under one eye and then the other. “We still have a little time. And we’ll make it count.”

Paige nodded. Unable to say anything for fear she might lose it again.

*  *  *

While Paige went to talk to her dad, Brendan stayed out in the hallway and talked to Denise. She told him everything that Dr. Kendrick had told her and it didn’t take long for Brendan to realize that Trevor hadn’t told Denise when the real diagnosis had happened. Dr. Kendrick had explained everything to Denise like they’d just discovered the cancer.

So Trevor didn’t want them to know that he’d been sick for months. Didn’t want them to know that he and Brendan had known what was coming.

Brendan hadn’t been prepared for this. But what the hell was he supposed to do? His father-in-law was dying, and he wasn’t going to go against what Trevor wanted, so he just played along.

When Paige came out of her father’s room, Brendan knew she was barely holding it together.

“You two should go home,” Denise said, standing up and smoothing her hands along the side of her pants.

“Mom, we’ll stay. It’s no problem.”

“No,” Denise said, shaking her head. “I’m going to stay with your father. He should be released tomorrow. You need to get some rest, baby,” she said, reaching up and patting Paige’s cheek. “Go home and be with your husband. Grieve with your husband.”

“But what about you?”

“I’m going to grieve with your father. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You’ll call me if you need anything?” Paige asked.

“Promise,” Denise said, kissing Paige on the forehead before she slipped back into the hospital room.

*  *  *

Paige did grieve that night, and every night after that. She’d curl into Brendan’s side and cry herself to sleep, and he’d just hold her. Tell her how much he loved her. She didn’t think she’d be able to get through the day if she didn’t know that she had a safe place in Brendan’s arms waiting for her.

He kept her going.

It didn’t take long for things to get progressively worse with her father. Within weeks, he was so weak that it was a struggle for him to get out of bed. He slept for most of the day, only getting up when Paige and Brendan came over for dinner.

By the middle of August, Paige’s dad was officially bedridden and attached to an IV and using an oxygen machine to help him breathe. A hospital bed had been set up in the living room, and her mom slept on the couch next to her dad’s bed every night. As the dose of his pain meds went progressively up, his lucid moments went progressively down. Denise was barely holding it together. Paige knew this because
she
was barely holding it together.

Paige spent most of her free time at her parents’ house. She’d often sit by her father’s bed and read him one of his favorite books; other times, she’d just talk to him. Brendan was there a lot too. Helping in every way he could. Doing everything that was asked of him, and about a thousand things that hadn’t been.

Damn, did she love that man with every fiber of her being.

One morning Paige woke up sprawled across Brendan. She moved her hand to the center of his chest and rested her chin on it, looking up at his sleeping face.

The last month and a half hadn’t been easy. She didn’t know how she would’ve gotten through it without him. It shouldn’t have surprised her that he knew exactly what she needed and when she needed it. He was her shoulder to cry on in a moment’s notice. He knew when to give her space and exactly how much. She knew why he could practically read her mind. One reason was because he’d gone through this before with his mother. He knew what it was like to lose a parent to cancer. The other reason was because he knew her.

She’d been so incredibly wrong to think she’d ever been in love with anyone before Brendan. No one could compare to him on any level.

She watched him sleep. She studied the face of the man she loved more than anything. She needed him so badly it hurt. She slid her thigh between his legs and pressed her open mouth to his neck. He stirred beneath her, pressing into her even though he wasn’t up yet. Well, not awake at least.

She pulled her underwear off before she threw her leg over him and straddled him. She closed her mouth over his and knew the exact moment he was no longer asleep because his tongue started moving against hers and he groaned into her mouth. His hands were on her hips, holding onto her as she moved against him.

She pulled her T-shirt over her head, breaking their kiss for only a moment as the fabric passed between their mouths. She threw it over her shoulder and reached down, pulling him out of his boxers. When he was firmly inside of her, they both froze. He grabbed her face and pulled back, holding her head in his hands.

“Paige?” Brendan asked, studying her face.

She nodded and pressed her mouth to his, trying to show him what she wanted, because words weren’t enough. She needed this, right now, no barriers. The kiss turned frenzied after a moment, both of them trying to consume the other. She moved over him as he thrust up inside of her, and when she came, he rolled her onto her back and started moving again. His hips bumped up against hers and she wrapped her legs around his waist. She wasn’t sure how long they moved together, but at some point another overwhelming orgasm raked through her body. Brendan followed her over and collapsed onto her, breathing hard and shaking.

*  *  *

Everything had happened so fast. Brendan had woken up with Paige on top of him. One moment they’d been kissing, the next he’d been inside of her, absolutely nothing between them.

Nothing had ever felt like that before. Gravity had pulled him under and then he’d fallen to pieces. He was still lying on top of her, trying to come back down to earth, trying to piece himself together again. But it was impossible. She shattered him.

He couldn’t have moved even if he’d wanted to, and right at that moment, he didn’t want to move ever again. Paige’s legs were still wrapped around his waist. Her hands were on the back of his neck, her fingers trailing through his hair. His face was pressed into her throat and every time he inhaled, he inhaled her.

“Are you okay?” Paige whispered.

He nodded. That was all he could do because he still couldn’t remember how to speak. When his brain finally connected with his body again, Brendan got up on his forearms and looked down at her. He reached up and traced her hairline, pushing her hair behind her ear.

“That was…” He trailed off, shaking his head. He had no words.

“I know,” she said and smiled, running her hands to the back of his head and pulling his mouth down to hers.

*  *  *

Paige had a lot of inspiration lately, most of it dark. She channeled it toward her work, and she assumed it worked because her pieces were selling like crazy. She’d actually cut back her hours at the funeral home, working only four days a week. Painting was one of the few ways she was able to escape for just a moment. Sometimes things would just build up to a peak and Paige needed something to think about besides her father and the constant pain he was in, because whenever she thought about it she couldn’t breathe.

On her day off, Paige would paint from the time Brendan left in the morning straight through to when he came home at night. He’d started stocking the studio with water bottles and granola bars to make sure she ate something at some point during the day.

Paige had finished another painting for the funeral home, this one of the fishing piers in Mirabelle. She’d painted a dozen boats with dark gray storm clouds brewing in the background. Most of the paintings in the funeral home were old and falling apart, but some of the frames were beautiful antiques. Paige switched the new painting with the one that was in the frame, and it wasn’t until the end of the day that she had time to hang it up.

The other painting might be old, but Mr. Adams hadn’t wanted to get rid of it. It had been hanging up in the funeral home since he was little, so he wanted it put in the storage room. Problem was, the storage room was down the hall that Paige avoided like the plague. She headed over to Tara’s desk and waited for her to get off the phone.

“We don’t have any
situations
?” Paige asked, pointing to the door that led to the embalming rooms. Even though she’d worked there for over a year, she was still completely skeeved out by dead bodies and still insisted upon calling them
situations
. The idea of being in a room alone with one was still way too much for her to handle.

“No,” Tara drawled. “Juris put Mr. Woods in the parlor this afternoon,” she finished, giving Paige an amused little shake of her head. “How have you still not gotten over that little fear of yours?”

“A fear of dead bodies
isn’t
little. And there is no reason for me to get over it. My job is done mainly up there,” Paige said, pointing up the stairs. “And
they
are mainly down here,” she said, pointing to the floor.

“Mmm-hmm,” Tara said and smiled as she answered the ringing phone.

Paige turned and walked to the door. She opened it and eyed the empty space apprehensively.

No one is in there. No one is in there.

She took a deep breath and made her way down the hallway, her heels tapping against the hardwood. The storage closet was the last one at the end of the hall, so she kept her gaze straight ahead of her, set on her destination. She put the painting away and shut the door behind her, determined to make a quick escape.

Problem was, Paige didn’t keep her focus on the end of the hallway and as she passed the embalming room she saw something large and green out of the corner of her eye. Before she could stop herself she turned to find the biggest and ugliest alligator she’d ever seen in her life. Long black nails stuck out from its stubby legs and its massive tail was sprawled out behind it. But it was when Paige saw its black eyes staring at her that she started screaming.

*  *  *

On days that both Brendan and Paige went over to her parents’ house, he dropped her off and picked her up from work so they could head over together.

“She in her office?” Brendan asked as he stopped in front of Tara’s desk.

“No,” Tara said and shook her head. “She had to go put something in storage. She’s still completely freaked out to go by the embalming room. She thinks a dead body is going to jump out and grab her or something.”

Brendan was cut off midlaugh when a blood-curdling scream made its way down the hall. For a second, everything in him froze as he tried to process the reason that Paige would sound so terrified. When his brain connected with his legs he bolted for the hallway only to have Paige slam into him at the doorway.

“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God,” she said, grabbing onto him for dear life.

“Paige, calm down,” Brendan said, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her back. The fact that she was alive and breathing in his arms made him calm down enough to think. But his heart was still slamming inside of his chest. “What happened?”

“There,” she said, looking at him horrified. “There is a—” She sucked in a shallow breath. “There is a—”

“What?” he asked.

“An alligator,” she said, finding her words.

“A what?” Brendan couldn’t help but laugh. He wasn’t sure what he’d been imagining, but it sure as hell hadn’t been an alligator.

“It isn’t funny,” she shouted at him, still hysterical. “There is a freaking al-li-ga-tor in there.”

“Oh, I forgot about him,” Tara said, from behind them.

“
Him?
That thing is the freaking creature from the black lagoon. What the hell is it doing here?”

“Someone dropped it off. Juris went to get his cousin to help him move it. It’s too big for him to move on his own.”

“
Big?
It’s enormous. It’s just sitting in the middle of the floor holding court. I thought it was still alive.”

Brendan was now laughing so hard he had to hold his stomach.

“This isn’t funny,” Paige said, shoving him hard in the chest. “I thought it was going to kill me.”

“Oh no, it’s really funny. How in the hell could a live alligator get into the backroom of this building without anyone knowing? I mean, really, if you think about it, there would be claw marks on the floors, and it would have had to get through at least three doors.”

“Stop looking at this logically. There is absolutely
nothing
logical about a dead alligator in a funeral home,” she said, narrowing her eyes at him as her face got redder and redder.

The angrier she got, the funnier Brendan found it. He couldn’t stop laughing.

“Stop it,” she shouted and shoved him again. “Stop laughing at me.”

“I’m not laughing at you,” he said, wiping his eyes. “Okay, well maybe I am a little. God, Paige, when I heard you scream I thought you were dying. It probably cut ten years off my life,” he said, pulling her into his chest.