Read Unconditionally (Brown County #4) Online
Authors: Amber Nation
Ethan
Pulling over into a vacant parking lot after leaving Big Pete’s, I put the cruiser in park and slammed my hands on the steering wheel. Why didn’t I speak up sooner about my feelings for Toby?
Resting my forehead on my hands as they gripped the wheel, I recalled last night and hearing that guy profess his love for Toby. I was so pissed off at myself for hiding myself to Toby because I was worried about the possibility of getting another broken heart, but it hurt even worse not even having that chance with Toby. From the things I had heard about Gio he didn’t deserve another chance, he should’ve valued the chance he had while they were together but he didn’t, he gave it up as if what they had meant absolutely nothing to him.
When Owen and I broke up I relentlessly tried to get him back so we could work on what we had, it was a dead end but at least I tried. Gio let Toby leave and now after a year apart he decided that he’s in love with him? I personally called bullshit and hoped that Toby could see through that as well.
I moved a hand to my mouth and rubbed the pad of my index finger across my lips reveling in the feeling of our shared kiss. I went to him without any preconceived notions or even thinking that he would return the exchange but I almost felt as if my knees would buckle when he began kissing me back. That was hands down the best kiss I had ever experienced in my life and I would remember it for a lifetime if he chose not to be with me.
Knowing for a fact that if he decided to go with Gio that it would be all my fault because of the way I treated him. I realized now that I was trying too hard in guarding my heart and didn’t want to make it known about my attraction to him, so I more or less acted like a little boy who had his first crush but pushed them down on the playground because he was too chicken shit to make it known.
Tonight was going to be a hard night but I would be attending that show regardless of the outcome since most of the town would be in attendance. I hoped for the sake of my already damaged heart that fate would be on my side.
Toby
Three Months Later
The fall season had descended upon us and wedding bells were in the air. Seated around a rectangular table in the gym of Brown County Church, the entire gang was in attendance for Mike and Sheridan’s rehearsal dinner. I took in the happy faces of my most favorite people in the entire world as their smiles matched my own. To think several months earlier, I did something similar to this, watching each of my friends and their significant others interacting with one another and their children with despair and now I was just amazed how far things had come not just for me but for all of us.
I couldn’t recall the last time that I had smiled so much and my cheeks were hurting just from the permanent expression that had been on my face for the past few months.
A hand snaked onto my thigh and as his grip squeezed me I looked up at him and was rewarded with a smile of his own. I was instantly taken back to the night where my life changed…
After my decision had become incredibly clear, I dropped my mic and hopped off the stage walking directly to Gio.
I looked into his eyes and witnessed the sheer happiness in his face and knew that I was about to hurt him. I stood up on my tip toes, kissed his cheek and said, “I’m so sorry, Gio.” Leaving him, I headed straight for Ethan who had remained seated at the bar throughout the entire show. I stepped into his parted legs and gently brushed my lips against his before kissing him with every bit of passion and desperation as he had just a few hours earlier.
During the song everything became incredibly clear. Even though Ethan could irritate me to no end, I had never felt more alive and more myself than in those moments of bickering.
If it had taken me this long to decide if things between Gio and myself would work out then that undeniably meant that they wouldn’t. It should’ve been a clear cut decision instead of wrestling with the idiocy of weighing pros and cons.
As I backed away from the kiss that sealed my heart to his, I took a cleansing breath, “After everything you’ve been through, the fact that you want to take this chance with me means more than you can even imagine. I choose you, Ethan Bradley.” I wagged my eyebrows and gave him a seductive glance, “Now take me somewhere where I can claim my prize properly.”
I had to back up as he quickly stood and gave me one last chaste kiss before he went to find Charlie so he could relieve him of duty.
Arriving at Ethan’s house, we barely entered the front door before he was on me again, kissing my lips and then placing a line of kisses down my neck. Untucking my shirt from my jeans, he raised my shirt by slowing dragging his hands up my torso, I was in heaven feeling his hands on me for the first time. I excitedly lifted my arms so he could remove my shirt in one swift motion.
My hands went to my belt buckle so I could begin ridding myself of my jeans, but his large hands covered mine stopping me before I ever could really get started. I felt so small in comparison to him, my frame slight against his.
“I like to unwrap my men, Toby. Peeling their clothing away ever so slowly, building up the anticipation for what’s to come. Which hopefully sooner rather than later, that’ll be you.”
Sweet sassy molassy, I felt as if I needed to take a time out to fan myself, especially when he stood back and began taking his uniform off, one piece at a time.
Once he had stripped to his boxer briefs, he dropped to his knees in front of me and began unbuttoning my jeans. I had to brace against the wall for support because it felt as if my knees would buckle at any given moment.
This moment was so incredibly surreal as my fantasy was actually becoming a reality. I was normally a bottom, but I wasn’t going to argue especially once his tongue swirled around the head of my engorged cock. Then the recesses of Ethan’s hot mouth descended upon me, taking me all the way until I was hitting the back of his throat. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as the pleasure of my new reality unfolded in front of me.
“Toby, it’s time for your song,” Ethan whispered into my ear as he caressed my shoulder.
Ah yes, I was brought back to the present as I looked into Ethan’s eyes and saw the undeniable passion reflected back at me. I leaned forward to give him a brief kiss and I said the three words that became a part of our everyday vocabulary this morning, “I love you.”
As I walked towards the stage, I was reminded of the way he woke me up…
He nudged my back before running his fingertips down my spine, so not only was I now wide awake, but I had goose bumps breaking out over my naked flesh. Rolling over on my back to look up at him his eyes immediately cast downward towards my morning erection.
Raising a hand to shove him in the shoulder and to call him a perv, he caught my arm before my skin connected with his and interlocked our fingers together. “Toby Morgan, I can’t keep this inside any longer. I can no longer keep my feelings bottled up. I love you. I’m hopelessly and assuredly in love with you.”
If it were even possible my heart swelled bigger than it ever had before. Hearing Ethan profess his love for me made me fall even deeper in love with him. I reached up my free hand and caressed the side of his beautiful face, “I never thought that I could love someone as much as I love you, Ethan Bradley.”
Ethan truly was a southern gentleman. It’s amazing really how sometimes being attracted to someone makes you say things and act differently than you normally would. So now you know why I had this permanent smile on my face and it was every bit as real as my love for Ethan. Sometimes we had to accept that things that are in the past, stay in the past and that a second chance isn’t reserved for everyone. I didn’t regret my decision in choosing Ethan over Gio even for a second as I heard he’s found his life partner in Roman. I wished them the best of luck in their lives and hoped that they had found even a fraction of the happiness that I have.
Sitting in the middle of a piano bench, I hovered my fingers over the eighty-eight ivory and black keys to an upright piano and descended on the first notes to “Unconditionally” by Katy Perry. Over the past month, I had been taking piano lessons from Sheridan and she had no idea until now that she was partaking in my wedding present to them.
As I sang this song, that could very well be my anthem because I felt it so deeply down to my bones, I was so glad that Ethan and I opened our hearts to each-other. Somehow being drawn to one another in some unexplainable way from the very beginning. We may be complete opposites, but he was the yin to my yang, the peanut butter to my jelly, and he challenged me every single day, and I could now say without a doubt, loved me unconditionally.
I currently reside in Southern Indiana with my husband and two daughters. I spent most of my life trying to get out of Indiana, then spent four years trying to get back in, once my husband enlisted in the US Army and we were stationed at Fort Hood, Texas.
I am a stay at home mom and wouldn’t have it any other way. Even though most of my time is spent transporting my girls to their various sports activities or running them back and forth to school, it is a blessing just to be with them each and every day.
I am a concert and road trip junkie! I love the thrill of seeing my favorite bands live, and just having fun on the open road.
My kindle has become like an extra appendage, as it is never far from my side. I became obsessed with books a little more than a year and a half ago and wished I had gotten into them much sooner!! My love of reading is what sparked my passion for writing, and now it’s one of my favorite things that I do for myself.
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