Uncle John’s Heavy Duty Bathroom Reader@ (27 page)

•
Hawaiian Punch
is made with Hawaiian fruits, including papaya and pineapple, but it was invented in Fullerton, California.

•
Vienna Beef
is a popular brand of hot dogs and deli meats manufactured by a Chicago-based company.

•
Arizona Jeans
clothing is produced by and sold at J.C. Penney stores, based in Plano, Texas.

•
Budweiser
beer is named after the town of Budweis in Bohemia, (now part of the Czech Republic), but it originated in Missouri.

•
Vermont Castings
manufactures wood-burning stoves and grills. The company’s home offices are in Kentucky; all of its products are made in China.

•
New York Brand Texas Toast
is produced in Ohio.

In 1915 drought-ridden San Diego, CA, hired a “rainmaker.” A week later, the city flooded.

LAST CONCERTS

Quiz your friends—see if they know when and where these famous acts played their very last shows
.

T
HE DOORS (WITH JIM MORRISON)

Venue and Date:
The Warehouse, New Orleans, Louisiana, December 12, 1970

The Show:
In late 1970, the Doors set out on a tour to support their upcoming sixth album,
L.A. Woman
. It lasted only two nights. The first show was in Dallas, Texas, the second was at the Warehouse—and that’s where the increasingly drunk and drug-addled Jim Morrison lost it. He started omitting lyrics to songs, then slumped down on the stage, lay there for a while, got up, tried to sing, and, according to keyboardist Ray Manzarek, “Jim picked up the microphone stand and repeatedly bashed it into the stage, over and over until there was the sound of wood splintering. He threw the stand into the stunned audience, turned, and plopped down on the drum riser, sitting motionless.” Manzarek, drummer John Densmore, and guitarist Robby Krieger met backstage after the show and agreed—the Doors were done as a live musical act. In March 1971, Morrison moved to Paris; that July he died there, and the Doors were done for good.

Coda:
Ticket cost of the last Doors show: $5. The remaining members actually carried on as “The Doors,” released two more albums and toured to support each one. But they weren’t the same without Morrison, and finally disbanded in March 1973.

NIRVANA

Venue and Date:
Terminal 1, Munich, Germany, March 1, 1994

The Show:
This concert took place less than a month into what was supposed to be several months of touring. The band played played 20 songs, then came out for a five-song encore, finishing with their 1993 hit, “Heart-Shaped Box.” Lead singer Kurt Cobain was suffering from bronchitis, so the next night’s show was canceled. On March 4, Cobain was hospitalized in Rome because of a drug overdose, and the rest of the tour was canceled. On April 8, he killed himself in his Seattle home, and Nirvana was history.

Howard Hughes based his design for a conical bra on the nose cone of an airplane.

Coda:
The opening act for the show were fellow Washingtonians the Melvins, sometimes called the “Godfathers of Grunge.”

STEVIE RAY VAUGHAN

Venue and Date:
Alpine Valley Music Theatre, East Troy, Wisconsin, August 26, 1990

The Show:
Vaughan was touring with Eric Clapton that summer, and after the night’s closing set Clapton introduced the audience to “the best guitar players in the entire world.” Out came Stevie, his brother Jimmy Vaughan, Buddy Guy, and Robert Cray. They played a blistering 15-minute version of the Robert Johnson blues classic “Sweet Home Chicago.” Afterward, players and crew boarded four helicopters that had been reserved to take them to Chicago for their next show. Shortly after takeoff, around 12:40 a.m. and in heavy fog, the helicopter carrying Vaughan and three members of Clapton’s management team crashed into a hillside. The pilot and all four passengers were killed.

Coda:
The other three helicopters made it to Chicago safely, knowing nothing about the crash. They were told about it the next morning.

FRANK SINATRA

Venue and Date:
The Frank Sinatra Celebrity Golf Classic, Palm Desert, California, February 25, 1995

The Show:
At 79 years old, Sinatra ended his touring career with two shows at Japan’s Fukuoka Dome on December 19 and 20, 1994. In 1995 he decided to retire completely, and staged one farewell performance on the final night of his charity golf tournament, singing for 1,200 invited guests. He sang a handful of the songs he made famous, including “I’ve Got the World on a String,” “Fly Me to the Moon,” “My Kind of Town,” and ended his 60-year performing career with “The Best Is Yet to Come.”

Coda:
That was Sinatra’s last
concert
appearance, but there was still one more show to come. On November 19, 1995, ABC presented an 80th birthday special for Sinatra at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles. Guests included Tony Bennett, Patti LaBelle, Bruce Springsteen, Hootie and the Blowfish, Bono, and Bob Dylan. For the grand finale Sinatra joined the entire ensemble and sang the last line of the song with which he will forever be linked—“If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere…” Sinatra died three years later, on May 14, 1998.

15,000 workers helped build the
Titanic
. Average wage: about $10 per week.

QUEEN (WITH FREDDIE MERCURY)

Venue and Date:
Knebworth Park, England, August 9, 1986

The Show:
In 1986 Queen staged a tour of stadiums throughout Europe in support of their album
A Kind of Magic
. It was slated to end on August 5, but it was so successful that the band decided to add one more show, at Knebworth Park in Hertfordshire in southeast England. It sold out—120,000 tickets—in less than two hours. Singer Freddie Mercury led the band through a 25-song show, including a four-song encore of “Radio Ga Ga,” “Friends Will Be Friends,” “We Will Rock You,” and the big finish—“We Are the Champions.” The band went on hiatus after the tour, and seven months later, when Mercury was diagnosed with AIDS, they canceled all plans for future tours. Mercury died five years later and the Knebworth show became Queen’s final performance.

Coda:
Ticket cost for the final show: £14.50, or about $22. Opening acts: Status Quo, Big Country, and Belouis Some.

NICK DRAKE

Venue and Date:
The Adrian Mann Theater, Ewell Technical College, Surrey, England, June 25, 1970

The Show:
Drake was an English singer and songwriter who gained little fame in his lifetime, but is cited as an important influence by a huge number of artists, including REM, Lucinda Williams, Belle & Sebastian, Elliott Smith, the Cure, the Black Crowes, and many others. (His songs can be heard in the soundtracks of such films as
The Royal Tenenbaums
and
Garden State,
and in a 2010 AT&T television commercial.) He released only three albums, from 1969, when he was just 20, until 1972. He was also a very introverted person, and hated performing. His last performance came two years before the release of his last album, as the opening act for English folk legend Ralph McTell. The show did not go well. “Nick was monosyllabic,” McTell later said. “He did the first set and something awful must have happened. He was doing his song ‘Fruit Tree’ and walked off halfway through it.” That was the last time Drake performed in public. He died during the night on November 24, 1974, of an overdose of the antidepressant
amitriptyline
. He was just 26.

In 1937 ventriloquist Edgar Bergen received a wooden Oscar with a movable jaw.

LED ZEPPELIN

Venue and Date:
Eissporthalle, Berlin, Germany, July 7, 1980

The Show:
The English rockers finished off their 30th major tour since forming in 1968 with a 15-song set. They ended the night with four of their biggest hits—“Kashmir,” “Stairway to Heaven,” “Rock and Roll,” and the finale, an 18-minute version of “Whole Lotta Love,” complete with an extended John Bonham drum solo intermixed with Jimmy Page making wild sounds on a theremin. Less than three months later, with the band in the midst of rehearsals for their first North American tour in three years, Bonham died after an extreme drinking binge. The three surviving members—Page, Robert Plant, and John Paul Jones—decided that the band could not go on without their original drummer, and Led Zeppelin was no more. (They’ve performed together a handful of times since Bonham’s death. Almost all of those shows have featured Jason Bonham, John’s son, on drums.)

Coda:
Ticket cost: 20 Deutsche Marks, or around $9. There was no opening act.

PINK FLOYD

Venue and Date:
Hyde Park, London, July 2, 2005

The Show:
Roger Waters, David Gilmour, Richard Wright, and Nick Mason played together for what
seemed
to be the last time in 1981, after the tour for their blockbuster album
The Wall
. They mostly went their separate ways after that: Wright left the band in ’83; Waters in ’85. Then, much to the chagrin of Waters, a new Pink Floyd era began in 1986, with only Gilmour, Mason, and Wright remaining as original members. (Waters sued to stop them from using the name Pink Floyd—unsuccessfully.) That version of the band lasted until 1994, and seemed to be another end of Pink Floyd as a live band…until July 2, 2005, when all four—Waters, Gilmour, Wright, and Mason—walked onto the stage at London’s Hyde Park as part of the
Live 8
benefit concert extravaganza. They performed five songs to an ecstatic audience, concluding with “Comfortably Numb.” Richard Wright died in September 2008, so that remains the very last Pink Floyd show ever. Rumors that the three surviving members of the band would reunite have been swirling ever since, but so far, no go.

Why are hockey pucks kept in a —10° F freezer? Warmer pucks bounce on the ice.

ABBA

Background:
ABBA was made up of two married Swedish couples, Frida Lyngstad and Benny Andersson, and Agnetha Fältskog and Björn Ulvaeus. They lived atop the pop charts from 1972 until 1982—by which time both couples were divorced, and all the members were ready for something other than ABBA. They actually performed three “last shows.”

Last Show #1:
The last time the group officially performed as ABBA was on December 11, 1982, in a Stockholm television studio and live via satellite on the British TV show
The Late, Late Breakfast Show
. It wasn’t supposed to be their final show. In fact, ABBA has never officially disbanded. They simply stopped playing together temporarily and never managed to get back together…

Last show #2:
…until January 1986, when the band recorded a video of themselves performing “Tivedshambo,” the first song written by their longtime manager, Stig Anderson, who was a popular singer in his own right. The low-tech video, in which the only instruments played are an acoustic guitar and an accordion, was made for a Swedish TV show on Anderson’s 55th birthday.

Last Show #3:
ABBA’s
last
performance came 13 years later. In 2002 Björn Ulvaeus revealed on German television that all four band members were invited to the 50th birthday of mutual friend Görel Hanser in 1999. It was held in the restaurant of the Modern Museum in Stockholm. By that time the band members hadn’t seen each other in many years, but they ended up together on the restaurant’s small stage, and, to a small, hushed audience, sang “Med En Enkel Tulipan,” (“With a Simple Tulip”), a traditional Swedish birthday song, a cappella. That remains ABBA’s last known performance (so far).

About 1 in every 10,000 snakes is born with two heads.

OTHER LEANING TOWERS

If you’ve already seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in Italy and aren’t crazy about going back, fear not! There are plenty of other leaning towers around the world for you to have a look at
.

T
HE LEANING TOWER OF CHINA

Also known as the Huqiu Tower, this seven-story, 154- foot-tall brick temple in Suzhou City, west of Shanghai, was built in 960 A.D. and weighs in at more than 7,000 tons. That’s a lot of weight to put on a foundation, especially one that’s solid rock on one side and much softer compactible soil on the other…causing the lean. Considering that the tower is more than a thousand years old, it’s a wonder that it leans only three degrees, or just over 7-1/2 feet out of line from the top of the tower to the bottom. (The Leaning Tower of Pisa is 3.99 degrees or 14-1/2 feet off center, and so is this page).

THE LEANING TOWER OF TELUK INTAN

Built in 1885, in the town of Teluk Intan, Malaysia, on what probably seemed like a solid foundation at the time. Actually, this combination water tank, clock tower, ship’s beacon (and onetime Boy Scout headquarters) was unknowingly built over an underground stream. The flowing water caused the foundation to shift, which in turn caused a noticeable tilt in the building as early as 1889. The 83-foot-tall wood-and-brick tower hasn’t stored water for many years (but the clock still keeps good time). It’s now a tourist attraction.

THE LEANING TOWER OF NEVYANSK

Built by a Russian industrialist named Akinfiy Demidov, legend has it that the 188-foot-tall 18th-century brick tower was intentionally designed to slant in the direction of Demidov’s hometown of Tula. But a study of its construction suggests that the tilt was a mistake, and that the builders took steps to correct it: The bricks higher up the tower were specially trimmed to even out the slant. As a result, the base of the tower leans about three degrees off
center, while the top of the tower is only one degree off. (Another legend: When Demidov asked the architect if he could build anything more beautiful than the tower, the architect said yes, and Demidov had him thrown off the tower.)