Unbreak Me (25 page)

Moving up the line, he looked back at Edward, his travel companion. “I should have taken my father up on the charter.” He was exasperated at the many people who stood in front of him.

“Why didn’t you?” Edward asked as he got his passport and ticket ready.

“Because I won’t give my mother the satisfaction.”

“Sometimes you should just take the perks that come with being an Ellison.” Edward winked at him.

Connor knew Edward was right, but no matter what, he still couldn’t stomach the thought of his mother having one up on him.

“Patience, just a little patience, and this part will be over.” Connor tried to convince them both.

Standing there, Connor switched off his mind to the lot. Hong Kong was now his priority. The company and his career. Everything his father wanted was now the one thing he knew he could achieve. Romance, love and all the hijinks that came with it would have to take second place.

Finally, after a good twenty-minute wait, he stepped up to the check-in desk, handing over his passport and ticket.

“Good afternoon, sir, how are you?” the blonde asked him.

Connor smiled, scanning the red lipstick on the mouth that pouted at him. “I’m very well, thank you.”

Looking up from his passport, the flight attendant gazed at him. “And have you packed your luggage yourself?”

Connor was a man women found attractive and it helped him at times, especially when he was pissed or wanted to get away from something fast. He couldn’t deny the buzz it gave him, but still, women and all their weird mind games were something he didn’t want or need.

“Yes.” He was cool as he answered.

“No sharp objects?”

“No.”

“Has anyone else had access to your luggage?”

“Nope.”

“Very well, sir.” She smiled at him as she handed him his passport and boarding pass. “Here’s your gate, and the flight will board thirty minutes prior to departure. Have a nice journey.”

Connor nodded at her, smiled then turned his back, walking away from the desk. He stood patiently waiting for Edward to go through the same process.

“Again, another reason to have taken advantage of your father’s private jet,” Edward said as he stuffed his passport and boarding pass into the inside pocket of his jacket.

“Wanna grab a beer before we hit security?” Connor asked out of the blue.

“We can do that from the other side.”

“I’m real thirsty.”

“Let’s get through security, then we’ll have all the beer we want.”

Edward was a stickler for protocol, and being Connor’s right-hand man when it came to traveling, he knew how and when to reel in Connor.

Agreeing, Connor nodded and proceeded to the long line ahead. His insides twisted.
For fuck’s sake,
he thought. Connor never did have patience and his private school, bad boy attitude was getting a little too close to the surface.

“Next time I suggest flying commercial, shoot me,” he complained.

“Absolutely.”

Edward grinned as he stood beside Connor, trying his best not to gaze at the ass of the redhead in front of them. Connor noticed it, cringing at the way Edward bounced back on his heels, practically salivating.

“Stop it before you get yourself arrested,” Connor whispered.

“Just taking in the sights.”

Shaking his head, Connor ran a hand through his hair, looking off in the opposite direction, not wanting to be seen as a pervert. Completely unaware of the commotion coming from the back of the line.

Murmurs from disgruntled passengers raised voices and security guards making their way got Edward’s curiosity. “Uh-oh, they’re coming for me,” he joked.

Connor laughed, patting Edward on the back. “I’ll be sure to tell Liao you send your apologies.”

Then he heard it.

“Connor!”

Connor spun around, his heart pounding hard. It didn’t make sense. It was as if his brain had broken down and needed resetting. Everything became vague, a tangent, a series of little explosions in his mind, trying to decipher what was happening.

“How could you…you coward,” Molly shouted as she pushed toward him.

People moved aside, letting her get within inches of him. Security headed straight her way.

“You tell me you love— Then this?”

“Molly… I…” He couldn’t find the words.

“Don’t you dare.” Tears slipped down her cheeks. “Don’t you even think about telling me more bullshit.”

Just as he was about to say something, two security men were on either side of her. “Miss, can you step aside, please?”

Molly shrugged them off.

“It wasn’t enough that I nearly died, no, but you had to go and break my heart, not once, but twice,” she cried. “What kind of a man does that?”

Edward shot her a look, as though she were nuts. Connor stepped up to the retractable belt barrier. “Molly, you don’t understand.”

The security men each took one of Molly’s arms. “Let go of me,” she stormed as she fought them.

“Please, let her go,” Connor pleaded.

The men eased their grip on Molly, who gave them a series of bad looks. Jenna ran over to where she stood, trying to get her to back away, but Molly pushed her, not wanting her near.

Quite the crowd had gathered. The commotion was enough to pique people’s interests.

“You told me how you felt the other night, that was proof it was over,” Connor said in defense.

“But Hong Kong? Why?”

“Distance and new beginnings.” His words were cold.

Molly’s face paled. She raised a hand to her chest as she listened to the words. Her cheeks were wet from tears. “And this is your new beginning? Never mind the mess you’re leaving behind.”

“I didn’t do this… You know that.” Connor gritted his teeth, clenching his jaw, trying not to say the words that would have broken her in two. “I tried with you. I really did, but… You’re not the Molly I fell in love with. We both know that.”

Rejection was easier than having to live with the constant reminder of what he’d done to her. In his mind, this was the best way, even if it meant tearing his soul apart.

“You…don’t mean that. I know you. I’ve been with you. You’re not this stone-cold, heartless bastard.”

“Am I not?” Connor asked.

Molly stepped up to the barrier, looking up into his face. “No.”

“So why did you make me feel like the world’s biggest asshole?” His voice broke.

“Because I lost sense of what it all meant,” Molly whispered. “But you left…and it was then that I knew I couldn’t be without you.”

“Molly.” Connor’s heart thumped hard, making his head spin. Breathing through the building anxiety, he glanced at her, seeing the pain on her face. “I’m sorry. I think we both need to go our separate ways.”

Jenna was soon by her side, her hands resting on her shoulders. Molly tried to brush her off, but she wasn’t going anywhere.

“You don’t mean that.” Molly’s eyes refused to leave his. “Please don’t make me beg.”

Connor turned his face away from her in shame. He hated himself more at that point than at any time before. He could see the wound he was inflicting on her. Shaking his head, he swallowed the same lump in his throat over and over again, finding it hard to stomach the emotions running through him.

“Molly… Just go.”

“No…” she shouted. “Not until you say it.”

Connor knew exactly what she was asking of him. He didn’t want to say it. He didn’t want to deliver the words that would shatter both their worlds.

Reaching out toward him, Molly tried to touch him, only for Connor to spurn her advances. “Don’t…”

“Listen, sweetheart,” Edward piped in. “He doesn’t want you. So move along and stop causing a scene.” Patting Connor on the back, he gestured for them to move forward along the line.

Jenna’s eyes blazed. “Molly, come on, this was a bad idea,” she said, grabbing Molly’s hand.

“No!” she shouted. “Not until he says it.”

Connor turned back to look at her and felt sick. The guilt, the instant remorse, the hell he was now in. The words slipped from his tongue before he had the chance to stop them. “I don’t love you.”

Gasps from the crowd echoed in his head as he watched Molly’s reaction. Her beautiful face was crippled in the pain he was mirroring inside. He saw the damage he was doing.

Letting go of them, of who they were, was a hard decision to make, yet, at the back of his mind, he’d convinced himself it was the right thing to do. But at that point in time, he despised himself.

A world without Molly was certainly a dreary prospect, and he had only himself to blame.

Chapter Forty

Pressing the heels of her hands into her face, Molly saw nothing but a blanket of darkness. Jenna tried to help her sit, but she stumbled and fell onto the ground, trembling as her head spun.

The security men walked away, satisfied that she wouldn’t make another scene. None of it made sense to her. How could he have suddenly fallen out of love with her? All in a split second everything she wanted, hoped to have, dreamed of, was gone, snatched away, and all by the hands of the man she loved.

Jenna knelt on the ground beside her, consoling her. Wrapping her arms around her, trying her best to ease some of the pain, but it was pointless. Molly was now allowing the despair to consume her and there wasn’t a thing anyone could do.

“Come on,” Jenna said, helping Molly to her feet. “Let’s get you home.” Molly didn’t even fight it. There was nothing left within her to muster the strength to run back inside. It was over and she had to learn to live with that.

Traveling back to the apartment was a blur. Molly had no recollection of the journey. Regina was waiting for them when they walked in, but Molly was too far through even to talk about it. She was mentally exhausted and just wanted to switch off, and escape. Two Xanax later, Molly was out for the count. Her body needed the rest, and her mind needed to rid itself of all the thoughts, the memories—the newfound pain that meant recovery was on a whole new level of impossible.

* * * *

Groggy and feeling more hungover than refreshed, Molly sat up, glancing over at her clock. It was well past noon, and for a split second, she’d almost forgotten about the previous day’s events. Then reality came crashing down around her and she cried.

Connor’s words rang through her head. It was as though he had cut out her heart and broken it in front of her eyes, for all the world to see. Life wasn’t doing her any favors. In fact, life kept kicking her hard. And getting up each time was now feeling as if she were climbing a mountain, never destined to reach the top.

It was all too easy for Molly to sink back into old habits. The thirst was hovering over her like a dark cloud, refusing to leave, teasing her. The longing for just one drink lingered, almost impossible to ignore. It had been the first time since the accident—that God-awful night she vaguely remembered—that she really wanted to drown her sorrows. Somewhere in the back of her mind she’d convinced herself she had been cured of her demons, but that was just wishful thinking.

Walking into the bathroom, Molly opened the cupboard, eyeing her colorful display of medications. Lifting out a small container of Campral, she took two, anything that meant she wouldn’t have to face the temptation too much longer.

Molly closed her eyes and refused to stare at her pitiful reflection. Having to look at herself meant facing the harrowing reality of what her future meant, and that was hard to stomach.

A quick shower, a fresh pair of pajamas and a broken heart, Molly knew she couldn’t hide from Regina any longer.

Molly walked into the kitchen. Regina was sat at the kitchen table, writing a list. Peering over her glasses, she took one look at Molly, stood and held out her arms.

It didn’t take Molly any coaxing. She ran into Regina’s embrace, breaking down into an uncontrollable sob.

“Shhh,” Regina consoled her, gently brushing her hair with her hand. “It’s better out than bottling it all up.”

Molly couldn’t control it. A whole ocean of pain had taken over her small body. So much anguish, anger, hurt, complete confusion. Nothing made sense, yet at the same time, she knew it…or so she thought.

“He was so…cold,” she sobbed as she broke the embrace. Wiping her eyes, she sat on one of the chairs. Bending a leg, she lifted it up onto the chair and rested her chin on her knee. “He said he…he didn’t love me.” The words alone felt like glass in her throat as she said them. “How could he?”

Molly searched Regina’s face for an answer. But Regina had nothing for her, only words of comfort.

“Oh, honey, I’m sorry,” she said as she sat beside Molly, touching her arm. “He is a fool for losing you.”

Shaking her head, Molly rubbed her forehead, trying to think. No matter how many times she revisited it, the same throbbing ache pulsed in her head. The sickening sensation of utter doom. “I…just can’t get my head around it.”

“Sweetie,” Regina said. “Sometimes, no matter how much we hurt, there is always something to be learned from the experience.”

Molly shot her a look. “What? So, having my heart broken serves as one of life’s many fucking lessons?” she shouted. “Well, I’m sick of learning all these valuable lessons. I just wish I had never met him. I wish I’d never stopped on that bridge.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Oh, don’t I?” Molly stood, the anger now on the verge of exploding. “Wanna know something else? I am done with this place. So fucking done with all the shit that’s been served to me lately. Eugene, my parents… Connor—they can all go to hell. Fuck them all.”

In a rage, Molly stormed back to her room, pulled a bag out from her closet and began packing.

Regina stood at the doorway, her arms folded across her chest. Molly could feel her watchful eyes on her.

“Where are you going to go?”

“Anywhere that’s not here.”

Molly threw clothes, books and a picture frame inside. Slipping on a pair of jeans and a sweater, she then put on her sneakers, determined that life away from San Francisco was the only way of recovering.

“What about your job? Jenna? Your meetings?” Regina asked as Molly packed away her meds, filling her toiletries bag with necessities.