Two Times the Trouble (13 page)

The door swung open before her knuckles made contact, revealing Amalric. He smiled down at her. “Good morning, Jolán.”

“Morning. Is Lu awake? I need to talk to her about something kind of important.”

He gestured for her to come in. “She’s nursing Aliz, but I’m sure she’ll be pleased to have your company. I’m going to the kitchen for a pitcher of tea. Lu’s thirst has been unquenchable since the babes have started suckling. Would you like some as well?”

She shook her head. “Thanks for the offer, but I won’t be staying long.”

Ranulf walked into the sitting room from the bedroom. “Come to see our beautiful children, Jolán?”

His failed attempt to hide a grin made her laugh. “And their lovely mother. Mind if I have a private conversation with her for a few minutes?”

“Not at all.” He sat on the couch as Amalric left.

Jolán strode into her cousin’s room before nervousness talked her out of seeking advice. Seeing the light-haired baby girl at her mother’s breast triggered an unexpected longing. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”

Lu gave her a maternal half smile. “I hear you found your mates. Congratulations.”

Plopping on the edge of the bed, Jolán leaned in to hug her cousin. “Thanks.”

Lu sucked in a breath as soon as they made contact. “Um, what brings you here?”

“Tell me.” The reaction told Jolán more than she wanted to accept. “I’m not pregnant, am I?”

“Well, yes, but...”

A wave of lightheadedness stole Jolán’s breath. Tears stung her eyes, and she bit her lip to stop a sob from escaping. “It’s only one, isn’t it? Ivan doesn’t love me, does he? How can I possibly let him go? I love him, Lu—every bit as much as I love Liam!”

An arm snaked around her shoulder, holding her close. “Don’t give up, cousin. I thought I was going to lose Amalric and Ranulf, but Fate ensured we found a way to be together. Maybe he needs more time. Keep telling him how much you care for him.”

“But...but what if...” Jolán couldn’t force the negative words from her mouth. They cut too deeply.

“You know what Great Grandmother says. No
what-ifs
. What is meant to be will happen. You have to believe.” Aliz began to fuss when Lu gave Jolán a squeeze. “Do you believe Ivan is your true mate?”

Blinking to clear her vision, Jolán nodded, whispering past the lump in her throat. “I know he is.”

“Have you asked him if he loves you?”

Jolán blanched at the suggestion. What if he said no?
No what-ifs.
“I told him I love him. He didn’t say anything. Why wouldn’t he tell me if he does?”

“Ah, cousin. Actions mean more than words. Sometimes people say things they don’t mean, just as some have a difficult time verbally expressing their feelings.” Lu adjusted the baby in the cradle of her arm. “The words are pointless without the feeling behind them, but the feelings still exist without the words.”

“But if he loves me, even without telling me, why am I not pregnant by him?” Logic only made the pain worse.

“I don’t know.” Aliz latched on once more, and Lu sighed, obviously scrambling for some other plausible explanation. “This could be a test of your faith in him.”

Jolán rose from the bed, unconvinced but not willing to let her cousin see the disbelief. “I better get back before they wake up.”

“You’re welcome anytime you want to talk.”

With a nod, Jolán aimed for the exit. “Thanks.”

The visit had been a mistake. She should’ve waited to see if Great Grandmother even asked about Ivan and Liam proving to be true mates at the joining ceremony. Then, and
only
then, should Jolán have sought out the answer to her question. Showing confidence in both men might’ve allowed the joining to happen without verification of conception. She wouldn’t have had to fake loving them both. Now, with this knowledge, the truth would have to be told. Ivan would be required to leave the estate, his mind wiped clean, and she and Liam would never have contact with him again. Could she make Liam choose her over his brother?

He shouldn’t have to give up his family.
Only one alternative remained. If she couldn’t have them both, then neither was her sole option in the matter. Could she make the sacrifice so they wouldn’t have to?

Stretching his arms over his head, Liam yawned and quashed the sleepiness trying to pull him back under its spell. His stomach rumbled. He reached for Jolán, hoping for a prebreakfast appetizer. His hand met with an empty, cool sheet.

“She snuck out of bed about a half an hour ago.” Ivan’s serious tone had Liam turning to look at his brother.

“What do you mean
snuck
?” He sat up and scratched at the stubble on his jaw.

“She was very careful not to wiggle or bump either of us. I think she’s having second thoughts. She seemed tense.” Clasping his hands together over his chest, Ivan’s knuckles went from flesh-colored to white.

“Second thoughts? About what?” The click of a door in the outer room of the suite caught Liam’s attention. “She was probably hungry or thirsty.”

When he looked toward the doorway, Jolán’s troubled expression seemed to suggest his brother could be right. “You’re awake.”

Her slow entrance set off an alarm in his brain. He patted the mattress beside him. “Come here, sweetheart. What’s wrong?”

Instead of moving closer, she stopped near the dresser and crossed her arms in front of her chest. “I need to tell you something important. I went to see my cousin Lujza, and I’m...pregnant.”

A surge of relief raced through Liam’s veins. Validation of his and Ivan’s connection with Jolán. Why would she be upset if she had proof of their relationship as true mates?

“By only one of you.” Her qualification sliced a gash down the wide swath of joy spreading through him.

Ivan rolled out the other side of the bed, walking toward the bathroom. “Give me a few minutes to get dressed and pack up my clothes.”

“I love you, Ivan. I swear I do. Don’t you love me?” The utter pain in her voice tugged Liam’s heart in different directions.

He ached for his brother and for Jolán, but without Ivan in the picture, Liam alone could have the woman he adored.
She needs both of us. She told us that.
How could he consider such a selfish act as to keep her to himself? He believed her when she said she loved Ivan, and her happiness meant everything to him.

Pausing by the bathroom door, Ivan shrugged.

The implied lie stole Liam’s hold on his emotions. He scrambled across the tangle of sheets to stand behind his brother. “You son of a bitch! Tell her. I know damn well you love her as much as I do. The feeling that’s eating at your soul—it has words to describe it. Just say the fucking words!”

“What does it matter? She isn’t carrying my child. Rules are rules.” The door to the bathroom clunked closed with Ivan on the other side.

The lock snicked as it caught, and a moment later, running water drowned out whatever Liam could’ve said to dissuade Ivan from leaving. Movement out of the corner of his eye had him pivoting in time to see Jolán dropped to knees with her whole body shaking. Her quiet sobs ripped at his gut.

He hurried to kneel beside her. “I won’t let him leave. He loves you, Jolán. I know he does.”

She looked up, her face streaked with wet trails from her tears. “Then why...”

Wrapping his arm around her, he wracked his brain for an explanation. “I don’t know. Maybe...maybe...He got a concussion from the fall. What if it caused some other medical issues?”

Her frown seemed to say she believed that possibility about as much as he did, but a long shot was the only shot they had.

“We aren’t giving up. The joining ceremony isn’t until tomorrow evening.” Helping her stand, he guided her to the bed. He smoothed a few strands of hair off her forehead and leaned in to kiss her damp cheek. “I love you, sweetheart. Ivan and I are a package deal, and I’m going to find a way for him to stay, because I’m sure as hell not letting you go. Rest while I deal with my brother.”

She reached out to grasp his hand and give it a squeeze. “I love you too, no matter what happens.”

No matter what happens.
Did she expect him to abandon her if her family tried to force Ivan to return to the outside world? Kazmer had already tried to kill them. There was no going outside the protective spell surrounding the estate for any of them.

Liam stepped into a pair of jeans, sliding his feet into his running shoes as he buttoned and zipped the pants. He added a T-shirt to his attire and waited for Ivan to come out of hiding.

Exiting the bathroom empty-handed but dressed, Ivan pushed past his brother, not wanting to drag out his good-byes. “You know what? Forget the clothes. I can buy new stuff when I get home.”

Ivan kept his gaze on the door to the sitting room, unwilling to let his eyes soak up one last long look at Jolán. Giving in to the urge wouldn’t change his status as her temporary lover. After five days of scorching, unprotected sex, she wasn’t pregnant by him, only Liam. The rejection might not have been intentional, but it was a rejection all the same.

Aiming for escape from the apartment, Ivan strode past the bed. The sound of his brother’s footsteps chased him into the hall leading to the main staircase. A hand clasped his shoulder.

“Ivan, we need to talk to Romána. You belong with Jolán, same as I do, but something’s gone wrong. Fight for her.”

Rounding on Liam at the top of the steps, Ivan glared at him. “With what? Telling her family how I feel about her won’t make her pregnant. You expect me to stand by and watch while the two of you have babies and live happily ever after? No thanks.”

The smug look on his brother’s face had Ivan flexing his fist. “So, you’re finally admitting you love her. Why didn’t you tell her? She’s hurting just like you are.”

Except she’d think he didn’t reciprocate her feelings, and she’d get over him a lot faster not knowing the truth. Except that Liam had insisted Ivan tell her that he loved her. Which brother did she believe?

“A Macska witch never heals from a heart broken by her true mate, young man.” Romána’s solemn statement made Ivan jump. How had she managed to steal up the stairs without him noticing?

He sucked in a fortifying breath, letting it out with a slow exhale. “I’m not Jolán’s true mate.”

“Perhaps. Perhaps not. Without honesty, one cannot be true. Have you been honest with her? With yourself?” She studied him until he couldn’t hold her knowing stare any longer.

The old woman seemed capable of more than simple vision. She also proved the adage that with age came wisdom. Her words suggested he couldn’t be Jolán’s mate unless he offered her his heart to do with as she pleased.

He shook his head and waited to be chastised for letting his past dictate his future, but she only raised her eyebrows. Her silent prodding sent him scuttling down the steps past her.

“Another fracture in the protection spell was discovered this morning, Ivan. It is most likely only from the aftershocks of the earthquake since I cannot sense the evil of the Black Triad’s presence. Even so, no one may enter or exit until I am certain the charm will hold.”

So much for his escape plan. Her arbitrary time frame could be indefinite—from hours to weeks. His insides cramping, he nodded and continued to the first floor. He followed the south corridor past the library and the study, finally stopping at the first empty room.

Thinking required quiet solitude.
Damn, I have some serious thinking to do.
After a lifetime of watching his mother dive headlong into marriage within a few weeks or months of meeting her newest conquest, he’d resolved to take things slow once he chose a woman to commit to.

He raked his fingers through his hair. Jolán was nothing like his mom, and she’d given him no reason to think she’d dump him two or three years from now. Did he love her enough to trust her? She’d trusted him enough to tell him she loved him.

A gentle tug on the pocket doors helped them tap together, ensuring privacy while he made the most important decision of his life.

* * * *

Breakfast and lunch in bed, a bubble bath, and an attentive Liam obviously trying to compensate for Ivan’s desertion did nothing to ease the hole in Jolán’s soul. Hours had passed since her playful, dark-haired lover had walked away, leaving her to wonder how she’d survive with half a heart. If he’d said the words she’d longed to hear and demanded her family accept him, she might’ve been able to get through the day after he was forced to leave.

Instead, he’d left on his own. He hadn’t returned the emotions churning inside her, even if his aura had altered from pale gray-blue to almost black in the blink of an eye. A blow to his ego would have the same effect as a wounded heart. He’d decided she wasn’t worth fighting for. As much as she loved Liam, joining with him and not Ivan as well seemed wrong.

Her lungs seized as another thought occurred to her. What if Kazmer discovered that Ivan was outside the protective spell of the estate? Would the shifter go after him?
Not
will
he.
When
was the more accurate question.