Lana stared at him. “What if I don’t want to?”
“You promised that you wouldn’t deny me anything.”
“‘Anything’ didn’t include fucking your brother.”
“It does now,” he replied. A smile tinged his lips, and he raised his hand slightly. She brought her head down to his palm, allowing him to stroke her cheek. Tears choked her and made it difficult to speak. “I love you so much. It is not fair that you are dying. Don’t die on me.”
“If I could stop it, I would. I don’t want to leave you. I have no choice. If you want to cry, then cry. Then stop crying and tell me you love me again.”
Lana curled up against him, comforted by the feel of his fingers in her hair as she sobbed into his chest. “Min sann kärlek,” she whispered softly as she sat up to kiss him.
Enar smiled, exhaling the words, “Min sann kärlek.” He faded back into the pillow, his arm dropping from her hair. Lana grabbed a tissue from the box on the nightstand, blowing her nose. She picked up the phone, dialing Lee. She couldn’t speak, her voice disappearing in a cascade of sobs.
“I’ll be right over.”
Lana dropped the phone on the bed, curling back up to Enar to cry.
Lee lifted her, carrying her into the living room. He sat down on the sofa with her in his lap. They cried together, Lee stroking her hair to comfort her as much as himself. When the doorbell rang, he called, “The door is open.”
Two EMTs came in with a gurney, followed by two police officers, one female and one male. Lee pointed in the direction of the bedroom, and the female officer followed the two EMTs into the room. The male officer took a seat on the chair, eyeing them. “I’m Officer Rinds. I need to take a statement.”
“My name is Lee Manard. Enar, sorry, Fredek was my younger brother. This is his wife, Lana. Enar was dead when she woke up. She called me.”
“He was just dead?”
“Yes. He has been ill for a year. His heart finally gave out.”
“Didn’t it occur to any of you to put him in the hospital if he was that sick?”
“He didn’t want to end up on life support. There wasn’t anything that could be done for him anyway. The muscles of his heart and the arteries around it were weakening and collapsing. The doctor gave him five months to live. That was a year ago.”
“How long have you been married, Mrs. Manard?”
“Last night was our one-year anniversary.”
“You married him, knowing that he only had five months to live?”
“I love him.”
“You loved him enough to let him die?”
Lana stared at him, her face blanched, her eyes scarlet. Rolf heard the comment from the doorway, the anger on his face palpable as he strode into the living room. Lee pushed Lana off, sprinting to his feet as Rolf reached out to grab the officer. Lee shoved him back. “
Don’t!
Lana needs us here. Not in jail because you killed some ignorant cop. Remember what our brother’s final request was.”
Rolf nodded and went to Lana. He leaned, lifting her and dropping down on the sofa, holding her tightly. In her ear, he whispered, “Love me more now. Enar knows that I am in love with you. Is there any hope of you honoring his final wish? He thought you would, but he couldn’t promise.”
Lana gave him a tiny nod. “In time. I hurt too much right now.” She laid her head on his shoulder, curling into him to cry. Rolf hugged her tighter, inhaling the scent of her hair as tears dripped down his cheeks. Lee sat down with them, joining in as they grieved together.
Officer Rinds waited and then cleared his throat. “And you are, sir?”
Lee swiped at his eyes, sitting back. Rolf leaned his head into Lana’s. “Fredek was my twin brother. I had a feeling that something was wrong yesterday and hopped on a plane last night. My brother called me while I was in flight and we talked for a while. I was hoping to get here before he died, but obviously, he is already gone. Were you here, Lee?”
A momentary thought about using a cell phone on a plane flickered in Lana’s mind, but it was unimportant, and she ignored it.
“No. He sent me home. Lana called me this morning and couldn’t speak.” Leaning closer, he whispered in her ear, “Did he talk to you?”
She nodded. The EMTs came out with the gurney. The female officer followed them. “I think we are done here. I’m sorry for your loss.” She handed Lee a card. “My name is Officer Isabel Pole. If you have any questions, there’s my card. Roger, did you get the report?”
“I have a few more questions,” he snipped, glaring at them. “Please correct me if I am wrong, but didn’t your parents die mysteriously a few years back and leave the three of you millions? Their house burned down shortly afterwards?”
“What does that have to do with anything?” asked Rolf. “They died in a plane crash twelve years ago and their house was struck by lightning. It has nothing to do with Fredek’s death except that losing our parents so unexpectedly broke our hearts.”
“But they did leave him a large portion of their estate?”
“Yes, each one of us got four million.”
“Which Mrs. Manard now stands to inherit?”
Lana growled, her grief morphing instantly into anger at the unspoken accusation. Rolf felt her shift and grabbed her, holding her tightly to his chest. She struggled in his arms. “How dare you even suggest that I was after his money! I didn’t give a shit about the money! I would give up every penny to have a few more good days with him!”
“Is that why you lie in his brother’s arms like a lover?”
Officer Pole walked around to stand in front of him. “I think we are done here. Enough.”
“I just find it extremely suspicious that a woman who is supposed to love her husband sits back and lets him die without so much as a call for an ambulance. Wouldn’t you call an ambulance if you knew your husband was dying? I would.”
“He didn’t want to go to the hospital. Don’t you think I would have done anything to keep him alive if it would have helped? If you have any more damn questions, then contact his heart doctor,” snarled Lana. “At this point, I am taking every word that comes out of your mouth as harassment. I suggest you take your partner’s advice and get out of my house or I will make sure that you can’t do this to any other grieving widows because I will have your job!”
Officer Pole turned to Lana. “I am so sorry for my partner’s behavior. Let’s go, Roger!” she snarled.
He started to say something else and then snapped his mouth shut, rising from the chair. “You have not heard the last of this, Mrs. Manard.” With a final sullen glance, he headed out the door.
“I am so sorry,” said Officer Pole. “I will talk to him. I have no idea what his problem is.” She scurried out the door after her partner.
Rolf stood, flipping Lana to his hip like a small child. She reacted, wrapping her legs around his waist, unwilling to release the warmth of his body. Rolf walked over to the gurney. He unzipped the bag, stroking back his brother’s hair. “I will keep my promise as best I can. I love you, Fredek. Sleep well, little brother.” He leaned and kissed Fredek on the forehead and then turned and headed out the back door.
He sat in one of the patio chairs, shifting Lana to sit on his lap and face him. “What did he tell you before he died?”
“He said that he wanted me with you. He said that we would be perfect together and I should ask you how you feel about me.”
“You know how I feel. I have listened to my brother speak of you, and I am jealous that he had such a wonderful woman. I love your cooking. I love your laugh. I loved watching you with my brother and seeing how happy you made him. Our conversations are always intelligent and honest. I have come to know you well over the last year. The only thing that I have yet to discover is what you are like in bed. It was a subject that Enar didn’t talk about much. He said that it was something I should find out for myself. I know that you played in my brother’s back room.”
“The dungeon.”
He smiled. “Is that what you call it?”
“Yeah. The last time we played in there was two months ago. It was fantastic until he passed out on top of me. Lee came to my rescue, untying me and carrying Enar to bed. What about Jessica?”
“She was still around last night, or I think she was. I told her to get out six or seven months ago, but she hasn’t. Her stuff is still piled in the storage room at my house in California. I guess I was honestly waiting to see what happened here to make a final decision about my life there. I’m dragging my feet again. Bad trait.”
Lana couldn’t help but smile. “I thought you were a dominant, or was that a sadist?”
He lowered his gaze, smiling slyly. “I’m a bit of both, without being hard-core about either. Well…I used to be kind of a hard-core sadist, but I’ve slacked off over the years. It comes from the traveling I have done. You learn about other cultures, and I have come to respect things more over time. I kind of made it a hobby to learn about the sexual attitudes that exist around the world. I could spend all day explaining the nuances of different countries, but all that matters is that it has changed my mind-set. I no longer need or desire complete control or excessive violence to become aroused. I guess I have mellowed with age.”
She had always had a good rapport with Rolf, and they had discussed things openly, just as she had done with Enar. Rolf however had always been slightly more playful with words and she felt at ease joking with him. It gave her a sense of normality when her world was turned upside down. “Oh well. I guess I can’t have everything.”
He lowered one eyebrow, raising the other. “What does that mean?”
Lana suddenly realized that she wasn’t thinking to clearly and she hadn’t really considered where her stupid comment would lead them. They had never had an open discussion about sex before, but she felt oddly committed to continue. “I enjoy playing in the dungeon. I don’t want total hard core, but there are things I enjoy. Do you have your brother’s imagination?”
“I don’t know. Give me a specific.”
The chocolate cream pie instantly popped into her mind, and for a moment, she saw him standing over her, ready to crush it into her chest. Tears sprang to her eyes as she sucked her lips into her mouth to hold them back. She shook her head, unable to speak without going into total meltdown.
Rolf stroked her cheek. “If you need to cry, then cry. There is no shame in tears.”
She inhaled a long, shaky breath. Lee pulled up a chair beside Rolf. She could see the watery aftermath of grief in his eyes. “It’s gonna get better. I don’t know about time healing everything, but it does allow the grief to fade. He loved you so much, Lana.”
“I know he did. I loved him so much.” She saw the folder in his hands and asked, “Are those the cremation arrangements?”
“I dropped those off at the funeral home last night. I couldn’t sleep anyway.”
“Why didn’t he wake me sooner?”
“He said that he wanted to be alone with you and watch you sleep. He said he had some final thoughts to work out. When did he wake you up?”
“Maybe twenty minutes before he took his last breath. He said what he wanted to say and asked me to tell him that I loved him one more time. I answered him in Swedish and he did the same. His voice faded out at the end of the last word and he was gone.” Tiny whimpers escaped her throat as she started to sob again, her body going limp as she curled back into Rolf’s chest.
Lee sighed, watching them as Rolf wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly to his body. He set the folder down. “Are you hungry?”
Rolf nodded. “A little. It was a long flight and I didn’t have much of an appetite. I can’t believe he is gone. I keep kicking myself for not moving back here, for not spending more time with him. I thought of him every day. Lana, part of the reason he didn’t wake you last night was because he was talking to me. You were sleeping next to him and he said that you looked so peaceful. He said that he was afraid that you were dying with him. He was slowly watching you wither, like a flower deprived of water. He told me about the pie that you had made him for your anniversary. The balloons, the red roses, all the little things that you did to make the day special. All he wanted was for you to love him more than anyone else and for you to be happy. You did that, every day for the last year. The last thing he said to me was, ‘I hope that Lana can love you more now. I want you to experience the happiness that I have felt.’ He asked me to take care of you for him. I’m selling my house in California. If you will have me, I’d like to move in here. I certainly won’t pressure you into anything, but I want to be here if you need me.” He turned to look at Lee. “I’m sorry. But Enar knew the truth of things.”
Lee nodded. “I know he did. I keep thinking of him and Sue. He loved her, but for him to stifle his sexual desires made him miserable. It would be the same way, in reverse.”
Lana opened her eyes, staring at him. “What are you talking about?”
“You. I may be the oldest, but it doesn’t mean I am immune to loving you. Enar and I talked about it. You wouldn’t be truly happy with me, and I would always know that.”
She held out her hand to him, and he took it. “I have always wished that you were my brother. I never really had any family. My father died when I was twelve. My mother left about six months later and seems to have disappeared off the face of the earth. I have to think that she is dead. I lived with my aunt. She was very strict, very set in her ways.” Lana had always suspected that Lee’s feelings ran deeper than friendship. It hadn’t really influenced their relationship, and she could only hope that, with his admission, things would remain the same. “I do love you, but not as a lover. I’m sorry.”
He smiled, kissing her hand. “I know that. Don’t apologize. I have come to accept you as my sister and I know that you will never be anything else. That’s fine. Make Rolf happy.”
“I don’t think I can make anyone happy right now. With every breath I take, I feel as if I will melt into nothing.”
“You were not nothing when you met Enar. You will never be nothing. Eventually your heart and mind will heal and you will be happy again,” said Lee.
Rolf kissed her head. “I have to go to Canada in three weeks. Enar said you wanted to go hunting for dinosaur bones. There are some excellent sites in Canada. Think about it. I would love to take you with me when I go hunt for relics to sell. I will just have one of my associates run things in California for me. I don’t really like the business end of it anyway.”