Trouble finding Blondie (38 page)

“Very. To no benefit of mine, may I add.”

“I heard you all went crazy, by the way. Got complains from neighbors about the wild noises all night.”

“Yes, everyone got lucky except your... You see, this is where it gets complicated. What the fuck am I supposed to call you? A boyfriend?” Robert started arguing his point.

“Are we back to my non-proposal again?” Andre asked, a little irritated. “Ok, let’s have it. Blondie, did you want me to propose to you last night? Do you want to be married?”

“Do I want to be married? Not sure…”

“How many married people do you know that are truly happy?”

“Very diplomatic, Trouble, with all of our married friends around.”

Everyone was laughing out loud but anxious to hear the answer. Andre realized he set himself up for a major trap.

“Last night doesn’t count, losers. How many of you are truly happy, the kind of ‘can’t wait to see you’ happy, or ‘can’t wait to take your clothes off’ happy?”

Everyone was checking each other out in a weird silence when Brian finally broke the spell.

“I am. I’m truly happy. But we had over a decade of couples therapy to make sure we know how to do this. It’s not easy. We wouldn’t be married by now, and we wouldn’t have our daughter either. It’s an every day effort, patience, growth - individually and as partners, too.”

“Are you a preacher, Brian?”

“Quite the opposite. I’m the puzzle for everyone. I’m the adrenaline junkie with extreme sports on one side, tai chi and yoga on the other. Ask my wife.”

“Very true, everything he says,” Brian’s wife Ashley agreed. “Our sex drive comes from the deep connection we keep nourishing.”

“How do you do that, Ashley, when you have kids?”

“I hear you, Steffi. It’s the order of priorities that makes all the difference. God, Universe, then it’s you and your partner, then kids, family and friends, career, job, and the rest. It sounds really simple, but it’s the hardest thing in practice. Every time you get your priorities mixed up, you have to go back. Own it, fix it, and stick to it.”

“We don’t have kids yet, and we can hardly stick to it,” Aurelie spoke for the first time.

It was a voice nobody recognized. Therefore everyone turned, and Aurelie started to blush.

“I’m sorry, is it Aurelie, or Aurelia?”

“Aurelie, thanks for asking, Brian.”

“I know from Simona that most Europeans don’t believe in therapy. That doesn’t necessary mean that you are not spiritual beings or that you can’t work on yourself. There are many books, even courses to take. Therapy is just one form that came from thousands of years ago. Native Indians had healers, elders, and religions had pastors and priests. There was always a place or a person where people could get help or ask for advice. Therapy in my opinion is the fast track. It can save you years, if not decades. You are galloping instead of doing baby steps. And yes, it’s an emotional roller coaster. You are opening doors you didn’t have a clue existed, or the ones you shut a long time ago with three locks on. But the baggage you are getting rid of, the clarity, and the understanding you gain, it’s priceless.”

“Sounds like you are a big believer, Brian,” Didi was one of the skeptics, and it was a taboo subject for him.

“Yes, Didi, I owe everything to my therapy. My growth, my marriage, even my business.”

“Why did you go for so long?” Radka asked.

“You want to take this one, Ashley?”

“That’s a good question, Radka. I kind of got dragged into it at first. He was our acupuncturist. Brian went to him after a surfing accident when he almost drowned. He went for just an acupuncture session and ended up having an emotional breakdown on the table. That’s when the owner said, ‘I’m a therapist, too…’

We started with my lack of interest in the bedroom, but we kept going because our life was changing and evolving for the better every day. The growth was obvious, and the results were incredible. Over the years we spent…. it has to be in hundreds of thousands of dollars. But we made so much more that it was the best investment, not only emotionally, but financially, as well. The better we were, the more we made. It’s really that simple. The happier you are, the more success you have.”

“Why did you stop then?”

“He passed away.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about, Radka. It was his time. But we would still be having therapy if he were still alive.”

“Do you do anything else instead?”

“Yes, we take time to read interesting books out loud, chapter by chapter, and talk about it.”

“Wow, that’s amazing. What kind of books?” Aurelie asked.

“All kind, really. Spiritual mostly. Self-improvement. World leaders. Wait. How did we get here, Brian?”

“I volunteered us, honey, as the happy married couple,” Brian laughed.

Everyone around laughed, too, but they were all fully engaged into the collective therapy session.
 

“Well back to the unmarried couple…”

“Thanks, Brian,” Andre said. “You got some valuable points. But Simona and I already practice all that, and she reminds me of that priority list all the time.”

“Well, then you have nothing to worry about. Marry her.”

“That’s the thing, Blondie. I didn’t know you wanted to be married.”

“I didn’t. I don’t. I don’t need public proclamations of our love either. Or any paper to prove it.”

“....but yesterday there was a moment when you would have said yes.”

“I think so,” Simona smiled like a little guilty girl.

“....and I missed it. And the next ten times I’ll ask, you are going to say no.”

“Haha. Probably.”

“Come here, silly.”

Andre picked Simona up and carried her down to the lounge chairs. He laid down with her, kissed her, and caressed her hair.

“Blondie, do I need to be worried?”

“Worried? About me? About us?”

“About anyone who buys my w...., fuck this shit. Didi is right. Would you just marry me?”

“Hell no. Just for a title?”

“You are my everything. And if a possessive, boring wife title sums it up, then yes.”

“Wrong reasons, wrong way. I want a sexy, hot title.”

“Ok, so should I be worried that someone buys my Goddess a dress at an auction?”

“No, Trouble, you don’t need to worry at all...”

“That’s all you are going to tell me? Is this going to be another sore subject like ‘your number?’”

“It’s going to be what we make it to be. It doesn’t have to be an issue at all.”

“Blondie, can we get rid of these people. I want to show you something.”

“Haha. Everyone figured out your code words already, even your mom. And no, you have to be social and enjoy ‘these people.’ How about you take the boys somewhere and leave the ladies to lounge here. You can have lunch at the golf club, and Bernard will whip up a salad for us.”

Everyone was happy with that arrangement. The majority of them decided to play tennis, and a few of them decided to hit the golf course. Didi and David wanted to work on their golf game, and Brian was going to keep them company. The rest were heading towards the tennis courts. Robert, Paul, Stephan, and Stan set up a doubles game. Andre and Philippe dared each other for a singles match.
 

Andre got into the car to drive back to their house for his stuff only to realize that he had his golf gear, tennis racquet, clothes, and swimming shorts perfectly displayed on the back seat. He wasn’t surprised anymore, but it still made him smile.
 

He ran back into the house where all the ladies were already relaxed in bikinis by the pool. Simona was smiling, knowing why he came back.

“You are mine, title or not. And one day I’m going to marry you. Not because you are the best, one of a kind, or drive me crazy every day, but because I love you.”

“Happy birthday, Trouble. I finally got my happy ending.”

“Ladies, have a nice daaaaaay...”

22

"THE HOVERING HELICOPTER."

ANDRE WAS RUSHING off for some boys’ time. The minute he left, Bernard came out.

“Are they gone already? Fabulous. I hope we are skinny dipping, ladies.”

“Bernard, we heard noises out of your room last night. Come over here and confess.”

“Ahhhh, you are all married. Don’t suck me into any scandal.”

“What? Are you serious?” Radka was gasping for air.

“Bernard! Behave yourself. These ladies don’t know you. And they are going to believe you. Tell us what’s for lunch.”

“I made you a huge pitcher of Sangria and some snacks. I’m on my way to town for some fresh ingredients for dinner. My staff is making you a salad with herb chicken, served in an hour or so.”

“You are da bomb!”

“Aaaaaah, that’s Pigeon language. I have been to Hawaii, lady Ashley.”

“Very good. And hurry back so that we can quiz you about the noises.”

“I don’t kiss and tell, ladies. And you all know my room number.”

All the women were laughing while Bernard was bowing like a gigolo leaving a satisfied client. Ashley and Jada were Simona’s best friends. Their husbands Brian and David got along with Andre perfectly; they played golf together and hung out on social occasions.
 

Laura and Steffi had been friends for years because Damian and Paul were part of the ‘three musketeers’ from Andre’s London era. Radka and Aurelie were the other halves of Stephan and Robert, a part of a wild group back from the student years. Stephan was living in Paris, and Robert ended up back in Prague where they all started as kids. The only odd one was Suzi. She was a longtime girlfriend of Andre’s good friend Stan. Simona was going out of her way to make her feel welcome and at ease.

“Suzi, did you have a good time last night?”

“It was great. The set-up was amazing.”

“She is right. You outdid yourself. I love my butterflies.”

“You only took the butterflies, Ashley?”

“Hell no. But we didn’t want them to cut the rest just yet. They are still hanging. I took two butterflies from the table.”

Radka was coming down to the pool area with two sangria glasses.

“Simona, I owe you an apology. I really didn’t mean to ruin your party and especially your evening.”

“Thank you, Radka. I appreciate your apology, but it seriously isn’t necessary. You were coming from a good place. You were not vicious.”

“My intentions were good, but the outcome was disastrous.”

“Disastrous? I fully disagree. The dance was fantastic, the striptease even better,” Ashley was laughing.

“I agree with Ashley on this one. And it got all our men crazy.”

“Yes, I heard you all had wild sex. You should be sending me thank you cards, Steffi.”

“Thank you card? I’m ready to send you a ‘let me kill you card!’ I’m so sore...”

“Are you serious? I have some coconut oil. It’s soothing.”

“Not my VJJ, but my ass and my thighs hurt, Ashley.”

“Speaking of vicious, what is with your sister-in-law?”

“Which one? Why? Did she do something?”

“Not the sweet, sexy Monique, the other one, Margaret. She is like a helicopter.”

“Radka, did you say that to Chef Bernard? He used the same expression.”

“That’s funny, but I didn’t. She is hovering over everyone to pick up on gossip, only to have ammunition for future attacks or to stir some shit.”

“I’m sorry, but I agree with Radka. Her energy is not pleasant. She has a fake smile.”

“That’s interesting, Aurelie. I noticed her frown faces when nobody was looking, going into immediate smile like a show...”

“Laura, I have never heard you say anything remotely critical. This is fascinating,” Simona was in awe.

“Well, I’m usually the quiet one. That’s why people don’t notice how much I pay attention to. She seems very unhappy.”

“That’s exactly what it is. She has a good heart, but she is very unhappy. She may have natural tendencies to always see the cup half empty instead of half full. But she is also very unhappy in her marriage, with her life. She is very lonely.”

“I’m sorry, Ms. Defense Lawyer, but she is simply a miserable bitch looking for trouble.”

“Jada, that is pretty judgmental even for your big mouth. Especially about someone you don’t know.”

“I may not know her Simo, but her track record is louder than anything I can say.” Jada insisted.

“Wait, did she pull shit on you before?”

“Not a big deal, Steffi, but she made it very clear as to how much she disapproved of my divorce and also of my relationship with Andre.”

“Why the hell is she here then?” Steffi was in disbelief. Her German personality of right and wrong had a hard time accepting that information.

“She is family. And family you don’t choose.”

“I happen to know Andre disagrees with you on this one.”