Translation of Love (24 page)

I hear what he’s saying, but I can barely believe it. He loves me. It’s a declaration. Victor’s telling me that he loves me in a way that only he can, in a way that he knows will protect me from my own fears. Suddenly, I don’t care about my past, my fears, or the walls I’ve built around my heart. I only care about him, about how much I need him, about how much I love him. I’ve known that I’ve loved him for weeks now but was too afraid to take the leap of faith and tell him. Now I just wanna hear him say the words. “Say it.”

He smiles at me and I can hear my heart pounding in my chest. “I love you, Ellie.”

The tears that I was trying to hold back break free, streaming mercilessly down my face. “I love you too,” I say through my sobs. “I love you so much. I’ve known it for a while but I was afraid to say it.”

“Oh, Baby,” he wipes away my tears using his thumbs. “I’ve wanted to tell you for weeks now, but I thought that it might scare you.”

I can’t help but giggle. “God, we’re both so stupid. We’ve been feeling this way for weeks and we’ve both held back.”

He chuckles. “We’re saying it now, that’s all that matters, right?”

I nod. “Baby.” I wrap my arms around his neck. “Make love to me,” I say, wanting nothing more than to feel him everywhere. I whimper as he slides inside of me, filling me with love. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. Victor makes love to me slowly, savoring every moment, making the most of our precious moments together, solidifying the words that have just been spoken between us. This is what it feels like when two people really share a love. There are no false hopes and promises, no anger or resentment, it’s just pure love. Tonight when I fall asleep, enveloped in Victor’s arms, there is no restlessness, no haunting memories. I’m filled with peace and I know I owe it all to him.

I can feel the warmth of the morning light shining through the window on my cheek. I was awoken by the feeling of light kisses on my forehead, nose, lips, neck. A quiet whimper escapes from my lips, alerting him to the fact that I am no longer asleep. I hear him chuckle as he touches his lips to mine again. “Hola, mi amor,” he whispers. I can’t help but to smile at that. “That’s my girl,” he whispers. “Show me those pretty eyes.” My eyes flutter open as I take the sight of him in. My breath hitches when I look him in the eyes, remembering his words from last night. His eyes turn to liquid, which in turn makes my whole body melt with desire. “Victor.” I move my hands to cup his face, wanting to make sure that he’s real. He grabs my hands and links his fingers through mine as he moves to pin them over my head. He brings his mouth down to my ear and whispers, “Are you mine?” I want to scream out yes, that I am his, more so than I have ever belonged to anyone. I want to tell him that he has penetrated my wall in such a way that I know that I will never be able to repair it. I want to say it but I can’t find my voice because if I don’t verbalize it, then I can still hold on to at least some of my defenses. Instead, I bite my lower lip, look him in the eye and nod my head.

He smiles down at me. “Show me you’re mine, Love.”

“How?” I ask so softly I’m not sure if he hears me.

He brings his head up so that his mouth is now inches away from mine. I swear that he looks right through me in a way that leaves me exposed and vulnerable. It doesn’t need to be verbalized but we both know that he has succeeded in stripping away yet another layer of my defenses. He kisses me gently on the lips, sending a shiver of excitement through me. “Give me what’s mine. Open your legs for me, Babe.” The last piece of self-control I have slips away and I do what I’m told because in that moment there is nothing that I want more than to be his in every way that matters. In whatever way he wants me. He lets out a low growl, releases my hands and grabs my legs to position them around his waist as he slowly slides inside of me, filling me completely and sending little electric currents all over my body. I bring my hands to his shoulders, gripping him as he starts to move slowly. Every thrust, every swirl of his hips is deliberate. He knows exactly what to do to bring me to the brink. I run my hands down his back, grabbing his ass and holding on for dear life.

“I love you,” he whispers in my ear, thrusting deeper and making me feel him everywhere.

“I love you too,” I respond, my breathing getting heavier with every passing moment. He trails a string of kisses down my lips, my neck, and finally my breasts. He takes a taut nipple into his mouth and sucks deep, eliciting a moan from my lips. He moves up, kissing me on the mouth again. His hands cup my face and tangle in my hair. I deepen the kiss and run my hands up and down his back. He quickens the pace and my moaning increases with each thrust. The familiar shockwaves take hold of me as an orgasm rips through me. I can feel Victor stiffen his upper body. “Oh Fuck, Baby,” he mutters as he comes inside of me.

“This is how I wanna wake up every morning,” Victor says, burying his head in my neck.

I giggle. “I wouldn’t mind that.”

He repositions us so that we’re on our sides, facing each other. “How did I get so lucky, huh?”

“I’m the lucky one. Sometimes I still can’t believe that I found you. I never thought it would happen for me, and then you came along and changed everything. I love you so much.”

“For a while there, I never thought I’d hear you say those words, but I’m so fucking glad you did,” he says, kissing my forehead.

“Me too,” I say, feeling happier than ever.

He smiles at me. “You want breakfast?”

Breakfast sounds good, but I know that I’m too tired and exhausted to leave this room without at least having a shower. “Room service?”

“Sure. What do you want?”

“Pancakes and bacon.”

“Okay, I’ll call it in.”

“I’m gonna take a shower while you do that,” I say, giving him a final kiss on the lips. I see that somehow Rob delivered my bag last night because it’s sitting by the door. I open it up, grab my toiletries, toothbrush and makeup bag, then make my way into the bathroom.

The warm water raining down on my body feels amazing. Everything feels brand new to me, like I’m experiencing things with heightened senses. Making love to Victor last night and this morning was unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. It’s always been amazing between us but it was even better and I know it’s because I allowed the connection to really penetrate me in a way that I hadn’t before. I never would have believed that I would get here, to a place within myself where I would actually want to feel the kinds of emotions that I feel when I’m with Victor. This is love, and it’s so different from anything I’ve ever had before. I understand that now that I have this love, I have no choice but to accept it. It consumes me and I know that with the acceptance comes risk. I realize now that if this relationship doesn’t work out, the outcome will be catastrophic for my heart. There will be no way to protect myself from that kind of devastation. I’ll never be able to recover if I lose him. It’s a hard pill to swallow but there is no other option. Having Victor in my life outweighs whatever risk might be involved. I turn off the shower and grab a towel, pushing the scary thoughts out of my mind. “I can’t let my fears control me anymore,” I say to myself as I run a brush through my wet hair and pull on the fluffy hotel bathrobe.

I come out of the bathroom and see Victor staring out the windows wearing a pair of jeans and t-shirt. I walk over to him, put my arms around his waist, stand on my tiptoes and place my chin on his shoulder. “Breakfast is over there,” he says, motioning to the table with a jut of his chin. “How was your shower, Love?” I’ll never get enough of him calling me that.

“It was good. Exactly what I needed to start this day.” He turns around to face me, pulling me in closer and wrapping his arms around my waist. I tilt my head back so that I can look at him as he smiles down at me. “Mmmm, I’m pretty sure we already started this day, and if I recall it was pretty phenomenal.” I like the direction that this conversation is going.

“Really?” I tease, squinting my eyes. “I’m not sure I remember what you’re talking about?”

He pulls his hands around to the flimsy sash holding my bathrobe in place and grins. “You don’t remember, huh? Maybe I can refresh your memory.” He brings his lips down to my neck and kisses me there. Will I ever get enough of this man? We made love less than an hour ago and now I’m ready for round two. I lift up my arms and place them around his neck just as we hear a knock on the door.

Victor groans in frustration. “Hold that thought, Babe. Don’t move,” he says as he releases me and struts across the room to answer the door. His mother enters the room looking even more stony faced than usual. My body tenses up at the sight of her. Why does she hate me so much?

“Hola, Mama. What are you doing here so early?” he questions, irritation evident on his face.

“Good morning, Mrs. Garza,” I say as she glares my way. She looks back to Victor and speaks to him.

“I came to talk to you. It seems we have an urgent situation that I need to make you aware of Victor.”

I take this as my cue to get the hell out of there. “I’ll just leave you two alone. I’ll go dry my hair.”

“Actually, Elizabeth, this concerns you. You might want to stay.” I freeze, planted to my spot by the window. The look on her face is telling me that whatever she’s about to say isn’t going to be good. “Can I borrow your laptop?” she asks her son.

“Um, yeah Ma, sure.” He moves to the nightstand, picks up his laptop and puts it on the table in front of his mom. “What’s this all about?”

“It seems that your girlfriend isn’t quite as innocent as she likes for everyone to believe.” She’s speaking to Victor but her eyes are glaring at me. I come unstuck and walk over to stand by Victor’s side. He takes my hand and laces his fingers through mine.

“I’m sorry Mrs. Garza but I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“What I’m talking about is that as my son’s manager, I keep track of everything that is written and said about him. And since you are in his life, I now have to keep track of anything that might be written or said about you.”

“Ma! Seriously?! What could possibly have been said about Ellie that’s so terrible that you had to come to our room first thing in the morning?”

She looks like she’s enjoying making us squirm. She has an “I told you so” look on her face that’s directed at her son. I know that she’s warned him about me. She thinks I’m nothing more than a gold digger.

“It’s not what’s been said. A video has leaked that shows your girlfriend in a very compromising situation. His body goes tight and he turns to look at me.

“Ellie what is she talking about?” he asks softly.

I look up at him and shrug my shoulders. “Baby, I don’t know.” And it’s the truth, I have no idea what she’s taking about.

She laughs and it sounds almost like a cackle. “That’s funny. You don’t know what I’m talking about?” She turns back to the laptop, opens up an email message and a video pops up on screen. “Then what is this?”

I look at the video and instantly I can feel the bile rising up my throat, I have to fight to push it back down. My chest tightens and I can hear my heart pounding faster as the heat rushes to my cheeks. On the screen is what looks like an amateur video of Brian and I having sex. I can’t speak, I can’t move. I’m stunned and mortified and I have the urge to run away. I feel Victor’s hand drop mine and just like that, our connection is lost.

“I’ve got people working on making sure this doesn’t hit the internet. We need to stop it before it goes viral but I’m not sure if it will work. We are going to have to have a meeting and prepare a statement in case we can’t control the damage.” She turns to Victor. “This has gone on long enough. You need to be prepared to end this now and cut your losses before she destroys your career.”

He shuts the laptop and turns to his mother. “Ma, get out.”

“Excuse me? We need to handle this now, Victor.”

I can tell he’s losing his control. “I need to be alone with Ellie for a minute, Ma.”

“You don’t need to listen to anything she has to say. We have to handle this on our end so that we minimize the damage.”

“Ma, get out!” he shouts.

She jerks and takes a step back, looking as though she’s been slapped in the face. She stares at him for a minute. “Call me when you’re done,” she says as she turns and walks away.

The sound of the door slamming makes me jump. I feel dizzy, like I might pass out at any moment. Not only did I never agree to making a video like that, but now it may be out on the internet for the world to see and worst of all, Victor has seen it. His head is bowed down toward the ground, hands at his hips. I know he can’t even look at me. “You made a sex tape?” he says, barely audible.