Transcending Queen

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Authors: SK Thomas

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BOOK: Transcending Queen
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TRANSCENDING QUEEN

Published by SK Thomas

Copyright 2014 SK Thomas

https://twitter.com/skthomasauthor

http://www.skthomasauthor.com/home

Disclaimer

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters,
businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of
the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any
resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is
purely coincidental.

The second novel in the Pawned Queen series
by SK Thomas

Other E-books by SK Thomas: Pawned Queen

Chapter_1_Reality_Crashes_In

Chapter_2_On_a_Doorstep

Chapter_3_Where_Are_We_Again

Chapter_4_Out_of_the_Blue

Chapter_5_We_Might_Be_Leaving_Sooner

Chapter_6_The_Dream_is_But_a_Dream

Chapter_7_The_Truth

Chapter_8_Moving_On_Alone

Chapter_9_Looking_For_a_Home

Chapter_10_Lost

Chapter_11_Keeping_Myself_Sane

Chapter_12_Getting_There

Chapter_13_Abandoned

Chapter_14_Give_It_Up

Chapter_15_Say_Nothing

Chapter_16_We_Are_One

Chapter_17_Roses_Have_Thorns

Chapter_18_Say_You_Love_Me

Chapter_19_A_New_Queen_Rising

Chapter_20_Finding_Essence

Chapter 1 – Reality Crashes In

I awoke to a drab, cloudy day as silence
filled the air. Lying there unwilling to move, I let stillness take
over as I stare out one of my bedroom windows waiting for the rain.
My ears rang as I thought I have absolutely nothing to do today,
but really didn’t care.

A knock on my front door pulled me out of my
self-pity and back into the real world, this world I have learned
to despise so much. I waited to see if whoever was out there would
just go away as I closed my eyes listening to my breath coming in
and flowing out. My living conditions were simple, not wanting to
live without John. It consisted of marking time wanting so
desperately for it to be turned back and regurgitated. The knocking
persisted as it eventually turned into loud banging my neighbors
were used to by this point. “Son of a bitch, he’s back again.” I
mumbled as I got up pissed knowing he’s actually making me move. I
flew out of bed and headed for the door.

“Hey Jack, long time.” I voiced
unenthusiastically holding the door open.

“Why are you making me do this? Every week I
make this call. When are you going to snap out of it?”

“I’m not making you do anything! You came
here under your own free will. No one is holding a gun to your
head.”

“How long are you going to hold yourself
housebound while sitting here wasting your life? It’s been months
since his death, Melissa.”

“You don’t understand, Jack.”

“You don’t see me tapping out and giving up,
do you? People move on and this is part of the process. Truth be
told, he was a son of a bitch.”

“Reality doesn’t interest me in the
slightest.”

“Look at you, he left you with a mountain of
debt, insisted you sign leases that you couldn’t get out of and now
you’re just giving up all because of him.”

“Shut up Jack! Your psychology 101 isn’t
going to fly today. He wanted the best for me and thought by
obligating his responsibilities onto me I’d be forced to run a
business. He didn’t realize I’d sink and hit rock bottom.”

“Still making excuses for him. You’re
clinging onto an image of a person who never truly existed. You’ve
made him into a saint. He was my best friend too, but I accepted
him for who he truly was and not this knight in shining armor
bullshit.”

“Stop it, Jack. Please just stop.” I begged
of him.

We both took pause tiring quickly in regards
to this argument. “The main reason I came by is to tell you we have
another job. You and I agreed to run this business together, yet
I’m the only one doing these assignments. It’s away from
Barrington, which could help clear your head. Think about it, you
need this.”

“Leave Jack, if I’m interested you’ll be the
first to know.”

After he left, I snuck over and peered out
the window watching as he walked back to his car and pulled out of
the drive. I couldn’t stop thinking about what he said. John was
the love of my life. I still wore my wedding ring and routinely
smelled his clothes. Our photos were still on the wall and I
couldn’t even bare to throw away his cigarette butts from the ash
tray. The horrifically sad part of it is all too real, Jack was
right. I had paid his mountain of debt, bought my way out of leases
I had so stupidly signed and made good with others threatening to
sue because of unethical business practices. Nobody cared that I
was in mourning, depressed and needed the money myself. They
smelled blood, swooping down like vultures as they savagely tore me
apart limb from limb knowing an easy target when they saw one. They
understood the circumstances and left me with nothing. For most of
those months, I couldn’t think straight as my head swam in grief
and humiliation. They didn’t care and just laughed as I got
financially raped believing it’s just what I deserved. No one tried
to toss me a buoy or reach out their hand to stop the insanity, but
instead took turns grabbing their share and running away. Then, I
was left alone.

As I glanced into a mirror wondering who
stared back, I settled in feeling beat down and realized I looked
as old as I felt. Everything happened in such a little amount of
time, life experiences that would live within me forever. I took a
moment to remember the friends I used to have, now understanding I
have lost touch and believing we have nothing in common any longer
as I shuffled through the house surrounded by nothing but memories.
I made my way back to bed comforted by the soft sheets still
holding his scent while burrowing my way under the blankets
drifting off to sleep praying that I wouldn’t wake up.

A loud bang hit jolting me. I waited
anxiously, hoping I dreamt it. Another loud bang hit as I looked
out the window of my pitch black room to see the world still lay in
darkness as well. My heart pounded out of my chest, no one ever
came at this time of night. I checked the clock and confirmed it
was just a tad after midnight. Once yelling ensued just outside on
my porch, I snuck out to the foyer trying to place the voice.

Bang … “Melissa, I know you’re in there.
C’mon, it’s Carl. I can help you through this. Let me in so we can
talk.”

I didn’t answer. Carl had been one of John’s
buddies, an older man who became jealous when John began dating me.
He wanted a young girl for himself, a friend of mine perhaps and
when I refused he became furious. He could be a nice guy as long as
he’s sober, but once the drinking starts he turns into an
overbearing and abusive jerk. Through all this he’s had a loyal
girlfriend his own age, so why he’s standing on my doorstep at this
hour is beyond all comprehension. I needed him to stay out there in
the dark with all the other creepy crawlies.

Bang … “Melissa, God damn it, answer the
door. I want to comfort you in your desperate hour of need.”

I deduced the fact he is definitely
intoxicated. It was more like his hour of need, though I doubt it
would take him anywhere near that long. Oddly enough, the idea of
what he was talking about hadn’t even crossed my mind and not to
mention with a guy I scarcely knew while he stood outside barely
able to stand up straight. Some experts would attest that having
companionship at this stage of the grieving process could help a
person along, but they didn’t know Carl. I had been battered and
thrown around enough.

Bang … “Melissa, open up or I’ll call the
cops. You’re not the only one who lost a friend and I’m grieving,
same as you.” His voice roared louder. At this point, I was praying
he’d call for assistance. I sat on the floor with my knees to my
chest in the dark refusing to move an inch as the banging
persisted. I curled up hoping he wouldn’t be able to bust through
that door when I thought of Max. It took me back to that night he
kicked unrelentingly, much like Carl, refusing to give me a moment
of peace before sending me to the hospital for a second time. I
must have been a real asshole in a former life to have karma
kicking my ass around like an unwanted ragdoll, yet again. Amongst
all my thoughts and when I wasn’t paying attention, silence
eventually prevailed. I opened my eyes waiting before moving an
inch; sure that Carl still lurked about at a window watching as he
would try to prove his point. I felt helpless and unprotected
refusing to allow a gun in the house. The last time I held a gun
was over Max, I knew if John hadn’t stepped in when he did I
would’ve pulled that trigger. I refused to put myself in that
situation again. Eventually, I heard Carl get back into his truck
and tear out of the neighborhood, again I sat alone.

Early the next morning, my house phone rang
until the answering machine picked up. It was Carl as he left
message after message all morning until I finally yanked the cord
out of the wall.

“Did he not understand what he was doing to
me?” I questioned when deciding to answer myself, “This in itself
makes me a basket case.”

Barely finishing that thought my cellphone
rang, I looked at it in disgust while cocking my arm back to throw
it across the room when I noticed it wasn’t Carl who was calling,
it was my mom. “Yes mom, what’s up?” I asked.

“I’m just checking on you since we hadn’t
heard anything in a while. Are you coping ok?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for checking, but I
got to go.”

“Oh wait, I want to talk to…” I hung up
before she could finish her statement. I’m in no mood for small
talk and she had no idea how annoying that was.

I glanced out onto the back deck and then
beyond the trees to a creek. The ripples of a stream glistening in
the sun caught my attention as I stepped out listening to it flow
gently. The sound completely relaxed my nerves working its way
around me like a soft, fluffy blanket giving a moment of peace and
clarity.

I grabbed my cellphone and called Jack, “Hey,
it’s me. I need to get out of here, let me know when you’re leaving
so I can shower and get packed.” I hung up as I took a deep breath
in and exhaled while the weight of the world simultaneously placed
itself back on my weary shoulders.

“You’re doing the right thing.” John assured
as he leaned back on the railing of the deck.

Chapter 2 – On a Doorstep

I held still at the door waiting, not one
soul came to answer. I pushed the buzzer again and stood silent,
nothing. I knocked and began to wonder if Jack had given me the
wrong information.

“Who are you looking for?” a voice behind me
asked.

A little startled, I turned to see a man
walking his dog.

“Father Clayton.”

“Oh, he’s usually over at the church by this
time handling confessions. You can probably find him over
there.”

“Good, thanks.”

The church stood situated on the same block
neighboring Father Clayton’s house within walking distance. Jack
and I had landed in another small community, much like the one I
grew up in. It seemed as if everyone knew each other and that’s
exactly what I so vehemently tried to get away from when moving to
Barrington. However, the universe being as it is and conspiring
like it does threw me back into the very thing I ran from.

Jack had given me very little information
except for the fact that the investigation revolved around this
church and their beloved priest. He didn’t let go of any more
details and insisted I would understand as time went on. So here I
am waiting to have a meeting with this man of God, unsettling as it
is. I grimaced at the thought of entering another religious
establishment at this point in my life. Being raised as Catholic, I
had lost interest a long time ago to reach such required
expectations and didn’t appreciate the tradition of it all. Forced
to feel a strong sense of duty to live a certain way and attend
church that is in no way relaxing with all the pomp and
circumstance. Within the institution, they lacked anywhere to hide
from such close-mindedness with many rules and no exceptions.

Hesitantly, I began my long trek in his
direction hoping I would run into him between buildings while each
step brought me closer to my fears. They began to bubble up from my
gut, through my chest and eventually reaching my throat forming
into a gigantic knot that felt as if it was pulsating with a life
of its own. I studied the outside of the church gazing up towards
the sky, taking in how many stories tall the cross spanned
majestically looking as if it reached far into the clouds when
nauseating disgust threatened to stricken me. I became very aware
of the enormous undertaking I had in front of me.

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