Tragic Desires (21 page)

Whoa. He’s never asked me to do this. This is a little weird.

“Don’t be shy. I’ve fantasized about watching you do this. Please indulge me.”

“You’ve fantasized about this?”

“Oh yeah. A lot. Do it for me.”

“Where?”

“Wherever it pleases you the most.”

If I do it, I’ll come right away and maybe he’d rather this lasted a bit longer. So I start elsewhere.

“Like this?” My hands slide across my breasts and then I imitate what he does to my nipples.

“That’s nice.”

I let my hands move south until they get to where we’re joined. First I touch him. “
Mmm, this feels good.”

“Yes, it does. But I don’t want you to touch me.”

My fingers massage my clit. I feel awkward, almost clumsy at first, but only for a few moments. Then I’m into it so much I forget. He starts moving again and I can hear he’s close. I’m right there with him. It hits me hard and I open my eyes to see his on me. Right as I do, I watch his orgasm nail him, and dear God, he looks amazing. I can’t stop my hand from touching his face. When he calms, he takes my fingers and sucks on them, one at a time.

“You’re a fucking sex princess. The things you do to me, Gemini. I should be incapacitated, but you
… you make me want to fuck you all day long.” He moves his hand to where we’re still joined. “You’re always so warm and wet and luscious. Every damn time. So tight around me. And when you come, it’s …” His voice trails off as he shakes his head.

“Sex princess, huh?”

“Yeah. That’s exactly what you are. Now get your ass over here so we can sleep.” I kiss him and pull the covers over us.

I put my arm around him as he
lies on his side and I look at him for a little while. He’s asleep quickly, and I wish I could hop into his mind. What exactly is going on between us? Part of me wants to push him away, but I know that isn’t possible. One look from him and all my big talk dissipates, and it’s just mushy old Gemini. And what’s going on with him? He seems so desperate right now. As I watch him, my lids get too heavy to fight sleep anymore.

S
trange sounds surround
me and I’m disoriented, but I can’t see because I’m blindfolded. Then I feel hands on my arms and someone’s carrying me. Someone ties me up and I cry out for help, but no one comes. My blindfold is removed and I’m under bright lights. I’m blindsided by a fist to my face and stars burst in my head. Then the pain hits. When I try to examine the damage, I can’t because my hands are bound behind me. I know I’m whimpering, but they strike me again and again. My eyes swell and I can’t open them. Why are these people beating me? They won’t speak to me. I beg them to stop, but the punches keep coming. When they stop, I crumple to the floor.

One of them speaks, but I don’t know which, because I can’t
see. “You think we are finished? You are mistaken.”

Footsteps approach. Then I hear a deep growl. Someone
pulls my eyelids up so I can see.

“Now, you will
give us what want, or your friend here dies.”

What I see is beyond horrific. They have Drex and he’s bloody. They’ve beaten him and two men are holding him up because he can’t stand on his own. A third stand
s behind and has his hand in his hair, holding Drex’s head up. The man’s other arm is around Drex’s neck, a large knife in his hand. I know if I don’t tell them what they want to know, they will slit his throat. He will die right before me.

I can’t
give them what they want because I don’t have anything. I scream, “I don’t have anything, I swear! Don’t hurt him. Please.”

“Baby, wake up! Gemini, babe! Wake up!”

Drex is shaking me when I’m dragged out of my sleep. My whole body quivers and my face is soaked with tears. “Shit!” I say, swiping my cheeks. He grabs my hands in his.

“What was that about?”

“A nightmare.” Even my voice is trembling.

“Tell me.”

That’s the last thing I want to do after the way he’s been acting. “No. I’d rather not.”

“I’d rather you did. I’ve not seen you this upset since I first found you and you were in the midst of one of your head-splitters. Talk. Now.”

The ever-commanding Drex is back and in a way, it comforts me.

“Some men had me and were going to kill you if I didn’t
give them the file. Of course I couldn’t because I don’t have a fucking thing.” As I speak, panic pushes my voice to the point of shouting.

“
It’s okay. Calm down.”

“No. You calm down. You didn’t see what I saw. You were
…” I cover my face and try to stop the horrors from flashing through my mind.

His arms encircle me. “It’s gonna be al
l right.”

“No! It’s not
, Drex. These guys aren’t going to give up until they get what they want and I would gladly give it to them if I only had it! I think Huff is wrong. I think that bombing was a message to
me
. They’re telling me if I don’t give them what they seek, they’re going to kill
you
! And I can’t live with that.”

“Oh and you think I can? You think
I
can live with something happening to
you
? They came to my house, invaded my space, and tried to hurt
you
. And you think I don’t mind that?”

“No! That’s not what I mean at all
.”

“
Gemini, I have the best guys on this. We’ll get this solved. I promise you. And my word is good, if nothing else. One other thing. You’re safer here than any other place. Our security is tighter than anywhere else. I’ll protect you with everything I’ve got.”

“Why? Why are you doing this, Drex?”

He doesn’t say anything, but his blue-grays pierce me. They pin me down and paralyze me.

His voice is deep with emotion when he asks, “Why do you think, Gemini?”

I’m afraid to answer him. That question has been poking around in my mind for the last week and it honestly scares me as much as those crazy people who want to kill me. His lids finally drift down, cutting me off from the intensity and emotion of his gaze. I sigh—this is clearly a topic I’m not prepared to address.

My dream
has me so worked up and sweaty. I need a shower. Before I can get in, I sense his presence behind me.

“You can only go so far before I come and
find you, you know.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Don’t run from me.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“I don’t mean in the physical sense, Gemini.”

This is ridiculous, him talking to the back of my head. I turn off the shower.

“There are so many things whirling through my mind right now, I don’t know what to say, Drex.”

Damn h
is eyes! They have a way of digging into mine, and searching for the truth. He won’t let up until he’s satisfied. “That nightmare shook me up.”

He nods but is silent.

“I can’t tear apart my feelings right now, so please don’t ask me to.”

“Fair enough. I only ask one thing. Honesty between us.”

I nod. “Okay. I can do that.”

Then he leans in and lightly touches his lips to mine.

“You wanna shower with me?” I ask.

“Yeah, but I can’t. I
still have to be careful with this incision. It’s better I don’t. I was threatened by my surgeon.”

He leaves me standing there alone, and I suddenly miss him. I’m a
screwed-up heap of emotions. In the shower I think about how badly I want to know what my mom hid. For everything I knew about her, it’s so hard for me to believe what I’ve learned. At least I know she wasn’t involved in terrorist activities. Her letter assured me of that. But what file could she have taken that put us in such danger? What did you do, Mom?

It’s late afternoon
when we make our way to the conference room. Ten men are already working, and Drex jumps right in like he hasn’t been gone for several days. The whole thing confuses me because they’re using unfamiliar terms, doing things on their computers I can’t follow. A wall of monitors shows maps of Panama City, Austin, Las Vegas and the Grand Canyon. They also have all sorts of dates and timelines up for Aali Imaam. It all looks like absolute chaos to me. It must work for them, though, because they all function cohesively and keep adding notes on their computers as I see them pop up on the monitors. I decide to take a seat and observe until they need me for something.

“Gemini,
I need you over here please,” Drex says. When I move to his side, he takes my hands and says, “Hear me out a second. We think your mom stole a file that either tracked the patterns of Khalid Ahmad, the head of Aali Imaan, or the location of some kind of nuclear warhead.”

“Holy
crapballs! If that file contains information on the whereabouts of a nuclear warhead, we need to find that thing fast.”
Oh my God, Mom! What in the hell were you thinking?

“Stay calm here, babe. The other thing is just as important. Khalid Ahmad is invisible. No one, and I mean no one knows where this guy hangs. If this file has that kind of information, it could help us take him out.”

What is he saying here? “You mean like kill him?”

“Yes! This is geo-terrorism we’re talking about Gem.
This guy is responsible for so many deaths, it’s incomprehensible. So either way, we’re looking at something epic.”

“Shit! This is crazy. Why aren’t they trying to kidnap me or something?”

“It’s only a matter of time, in my estimation. That’s why we have the bodyguards now. I need you to focus. Try to search your memory for every single relevant thing. Think about church, school, things your mom said, did, places she mentioned, people she knew, phrases, anything at all that sticks out in your mind. And I mean anything. It may seem minor to you, but it may be exactly what we need.”

He’s so animated, it’s almost like he’s on speed.

“Hey, are you all right?” I ask.

“Yeah, I’m fine.
The guys pieced all this together and I’m psyched.”

“Have you had a lot of coffee?”

He really laughs this time. “Not a drop. Come on. Think, Gem. I need your brain engaged here.”

“Okay.” I sit and let my mind wander to when I was growing up.

“Relax if you can. Close your eyes. Picture your mom. Go back and remember the way things were with the two of you.”

Nodding, I smile. Her face comes into focus
. She’s so pretty. I used to love watching her put on her lipstick. She would let me brush her long hair and I would tell her I wanted to be as pretty as she was when I grew up.

“Why, darling, you’re prettier than I’ll ever be.”

“No, I’m not, Mommy. I want my eyes to look just like the sky. The same way yours do.”

“Well, I want mine to look like dark chocolate. That’s what yours remind me of. What could be better than chocolate?”

“I know. Chocolate on vanilla ice cream.”

And she laughs.
She has such a lovely laugh, it makes me laugh too.

“So, what d
o you want to do today?”

“Let’s go to the lake. I want to go swimming.”

“How about we go to the pool instead?” she says.

“Yay! The pool. Then can we go and get an
ICEE afterward?”

“We sure can.”

“Mommy, can we go on vacation this summer?”

“Maybe.
Where would you like to go, missy?”

“Disney
land to see Cinderella.”

“Ah,
you would, huh?”

“Yup. Can we go?”

“I don’t think so honey. Maybe we can go somewhere else.”

“
Okaaaaay.”

“Maybe we’ll go there another time.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

My brain switches to another time when we had a huge argument over when I wanted to go on a school trip.

“But Mom, it’s a school trip
, for crying out loud.”

“They don’t have enough supervision.”

“Then go with us and be a chaperone. Everyone else is going.”

“Gemini, we’ve had this discussion before. I don’t care what everyone else does. I only care about you.”

“Then come with us.”

“There
is no us because you’re not going.”

“Mom, please. I never get to go anywhere. Don’t you see? I have no friends. Everyone thinks I’m weird because I can’t ever go anywhere or have anybody over. Please, just this one time.”

“I wish I could say yes, but I can’t.”

“Why can’t you? I don’t understand.”

“I know you don’t, sweetie, and I wish I could explain. I just worry about you. It’s not a safe world anymore. There are people out there who would hurt you.”