Torrents (DROPLETS Trilogy Book 3) (17 page)

     “I know you do,” he said. His hand slid along my left arm to where my fingers rested at the nape of his neck. His touch left a trail of goosebumps along my own. When he encircled my wrist with his large palm, I felt my breath catch in my throat. Entrapped in his fingers, my hand was lifted from his shoulder and he brought my arm to rest between us. His fingertips slid against my skin again, this time moving upward until they came to rest on the handle of my dagger.

     “This is how I know,” he said and lifted my wrist to his lips. He trailed kisses along the inside of my arm until he placed one on the entwined carvings of the merfolk tails. My breaths had grown short and choppy by the time he raised his head once more, when his eyes met mine again, he smiled.

     “Here,” he said. With the loud clanging of his chains, he sank to the floor, pulling me with him. He braced his back against the wall and guided me to sit in front of him, his arms around me as I sat between his legs and leaned my back against his chest. I smiled to myself when he pressed his lips against my neck, and for simply a moment, I felt truly and wholly safe.

     “Where have you been?” I asked. He raised his head enough for me to look at him.

     “Why don’t you go first?” He nudged me and I almost laughed.

     “No,” I said and shook my head even though my eyes remained focused on his, the depths of his own gaze seemed to deepen; the churning storm inside warming my gut. “Besides, you probably already know everything.” I was rewarded with a smug smile and knew I had guessed right.

     “Doesn’t matter.” He shook his head slightly. “I want to know all about this trick you’ve somehow mastered.” As he spoke, he passed a hand over my hair and I looked away. A part of me was thrilled to be in his presence, wrapped in his arms, but another part grew afraid of what would happen if he knew all I had done.

     “Oh,” was all I said and I busied myself with sliding my fingers inside his own, reveling in how strong he felt around me.

     “Won’t you tell me?” he asked, kissing the top of my head.

     “Maybe,” I shrugged and then sighed, not really sure if I was making the right decision. “What do you want to know?”

     “How did you manage to master your voice so quickly?”

     “Oh,” I said again, thinking he was going to ask something much more personal. “I practiced with Derek and Sean. It was kind of fun.”

    
Not anymore though
, I thought, having now seen what it could do. I wondered if Verna could hear us, but thought to expel her from my mind, knowing it wouldn’t do well to think of what I had done to her.

     “Yes, but I heard of what happened with Verna,” he said and I tensed, even though I had just been thinking of her. “How did you manage to bend her to your will?”

     “That wasn’t so simple,” I said and added, “or fun.”

     “Come on,” he said and nudged me with his arms, clearly tired of my skirting around the subject.

     “Fine,” I conceded and took a rather large breath. “It’s all about control of a person’s will, and I achieve that by convincing them to listen to me. Normally, I start by getting them to listen to my voice, to accept the sound, and then I begin to send my thoughts to them. I say what I want them to do and sometimes it works,” thinking of how Verna resisted my last question, I added, “and sometimes it doesn’t.”

     “But how do you maintain control?” Zale asked, there was a curiosity in his voice which surprised me and I realized he found me interesting, an idea I could have never considered when I was in his presence.

     “With the eyes,” I said and turned to look at him. “It’s much easier to gain control when I have eye contact.”

     “Then how did you manage to break into here? Last I checked, there were two guards outside.” He spoke casually, but there was something hidden deep within his voice which I couldn’t name.

     “That was a little tougher,” I agreed looking away again, “but they weren’t expecting to hear me, and I caught them off guard, which let me into their minds more easily than it normally would.”

     “Interesting,” he said and this time I understood what lay beneath his voice. He sounded proud, impressed with my abilities; a flushing heat rose in my cheeks.

     Was it so remarkable I was able to find a way to control other merfolk, or at least get them to do my will? In all reality it was, but there was a terrible danger lingering in the shadows as well. I remembered all too clearly what had happened when the anger had taken over.

     “Zale?” I asked, his name cutting through the silence between us.

     “Hmm,” he murmured, his thoughts seemingly elsewhere.

     “How do you control the anger?” I asked, barely able to give voice to the words. It was silent for a moment and that’s when I knew he was aware of what had happened during Verna’s interrogation. He had heard of the way I had lost control and tried against all caution to bend her to my will.

     “With practice,” he sighed, and I felt his chest fall away from my back for a moment when he exhaled. I nodded and it grew silent between us once more.

     Glancing around the room, I pretended I could see everything clearly. I was able to see better, my eyes having adjusted to the darkness, but there was little else to let my gaze rest upon other than the man who had me wrapped in his arms. It was to these arms and hands, I returned my attention.

     “I tried,” I admitted in a whisper, the words coming quickly. “At first it was fine, and I did everything I could to not think about how she was the one to capture me, or how we never would’ve gone through all this if it weren’t for her. But as I was bringing her under my control, I started to think of what they accused you of doing and I knew you didn’t do it. I needed her to confess it. I just needed her to tell me it wasn’t you.”

     “I see,” he said after a time. I felt the air stir near my ear, the saltiness of his breath still evident.

     “I just wanted them to understand, it wasn’t you,” I said and thinking of the memory brought my anger back to the surface, along with a lingering shame. My fingers began to tremble. As though he noticed what was happening, he grasped my hands more securely, entrapping them in his own, until they stilled.

     “I only care about you knowing,” he whispered near my ear, a smile tugged against my mouth.

     “But how do you do it?”

     He sighed again, “It doesn’t always work.” He didn’t have to tell me. There was a particular massacre, I remembered all too well, which could remind me of what happened when he lost control; not to mention my near death in the cave on the island.

     “I already told you how I do it,” he squeezed me a little tighter for a moment, “I think of you.”

     “I tried that, well sort of,” I admitted.

     “Really?”

     “I remembered the way you were so calm when Bolrock attacked me, even though I knew you were angry.”

     “I was,” he agreed, his lingering fury evident in his voice. “But that isn’t going to work.”

     “How come?”

     “Well,” he said, pausing for a moment. “Do you remember how I taught you to throw your dagger? How you should grasp it, but not too tight?”

     “Yes,” I said, not connecting his train of thought.

     “It’s the same thing,” he squeezed my hands. “You have to hold onto your anger, use it to get you through the moment, but don’t hold on too tight or it will overcome you.”

     “Oh,” I said, replaying his words in my mind and trying to fully comprehend what he was saying. In a sense I had had the right idea at the time. I had tried to remember my anger and why I was questioning Verna, but I had wanted to keep it from controlling me. It was only when it had become more personal, when I had desperately tried to get her to confess who killed King Oberon, that I had lost control.

     “But you need something stronger to keep at the front of your mind,” he said.

     “Like what?” I asked, intrigued.

     “For me, it’s you. A memory, or rather, an image I have of you.”

     “Oh,” I said, even more captivated, “and what image might that be?”

     “I might tell you sometime,” he said and placed a kiss on my cheek. I was about to press on, but he changed the subject too quickly. “I guess I should thank you, for trying to gain my innocence.”

     “Maybe,” I said and leaned my head back against his chest. “You still haven’t told me what you were up to.”

     “Ahh,” he said and shifted behind my back, situating himself more comfortably against the wall. “Where should I start? When I left Hyvar, or before?”

     “Before.”

     “Okay,” he fell silent for a moment and then spoke, his voice softer this time. “After I left you, I returned to Hyvar, but I couldn’t get you out of my mind. I lied to Morven about what really happened to Bolrock, and he believed me, but I knew I’d lost his trust. I did what I could to regain it. Then he told me to do something I couldn’t, so I left.” He shrugged his shoulders upon finishing.

     “What did he want you to do?” I asked, curious about what had made him leave his master.

     “I’m here for you, you know that right?” he said softly by my ear, and my brow creased at his answer.

     “Of course.”

     “He ordered me to kill you,” the deep baritone of his voice sent a shiver down my spine, but I barely felt it as the reality of what he said sunk in.

     “He wants me dead?” I asked in disbelief. “That—that—can’t be right. He came to my house and could’ve killed me himself.”

     “I know,” was all my warrior said.

     “Then why would he tell you to kill me?”

     “A test?” he shrugged again. I could almost hear his mind at work. “It’s the only thing I can think of.”

     “But it doesn’t make sense.” I shook my head, as the memory of Morven’s visit played through my mind. He had certainly been hostile, as he always was, but he hadn’t threatened to hurt me bodily. At the time, I didn’t even have my dagger to protect myself.

     “So after that, I left,” he said as though it was a simple matter, but I knew it had taken much more skill and cunning for him to have left Hyvar without being captured. “Since then, I busied myself with keeping you safe.”

     “Really?” I asked, and snuggled closer to him.

     “Yes,” he said, “I spent my days hunting down Hyven soldiers Morven had sent after you.”

     This time goosebumps rose on my flesh, as I realized how little control I had over my own destiny. It was amazing I was still alive at this point.

     “I guess it’s my turn to thank you, then,” I said.

     “Maybe,” he replied, and I gave a short laugh at his use of my previous response. He had thanked me for my efforts in trying to procure his innocence in the matter of the king’s death. I had fallen short during that attempt, but I was determined to not be resisted again. Yet, as my determination grew, my earlier fears returned and my thoughts set on tomorrow’s events.

     “I won’t do it,” I said.

     “Yes, you will,” he replied, clearly understanding what I was speaking of. He knew I was afraid to use my voice against him, but he couldn’t know the real reason. “You wanted to clear my name, tomorrow you’ll do it.”

     “No, I won’t,” I shook my head, but I knew I was going to lose this battle. He had logic on his side. He couldn’t know my denial was coupled in the fear of what might happen if I lost control again.

     I knew I loved him, truly loved him as he was in his warrior form, but there were times when I could still feel the lingering anger inside of me for what he had become. Most of all, it was in response to the night he told me to save myself and leave him in the Hyvar dungeon. His words were as clear to me now as they had been in that moment, and though he didn’t remember, I did. There was a part of my heart which still hung on to who he used to be, wanting desperately to make him understand what I had lost.

    
But think of what you have gained
, I thought, trying to push the rising anger aside.

     “You will do it,” he said again. There was no hint of him backing down on the matter.

     “I don’t want to,” I admitted, knowing he could never understand how much.

     “I know, but you have to.”

     My head hung forward a little as I felt the weight of what he laid upon me. Lifting his right hand, the chains clanged and he grasped my chin to turn my face to his. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore him, even though I felt his breath swirl around my lips.

     “Look at me,” he said gently, his tone asking, rather than demanding.

     When I opened my eyes, I met his gaze and felt the warmth of them once more. I knew I would do as he asked, even though my fear was mounting at the thought of having to go through with it.

     “You know we could avoid this?”

     “How so?” he whispered, his lips getting closer.

      “I have the keys,” I leaned in and pressed my lips against his gently, only for a moment. “I could free you and you could escape.”

     “I could,” he agreed, “but I won’t.”