Torn (25 page)

“Let’s try this again. Where is Ethan?”

“Ethan is no longer.”

“Is he dead?”

His laugh became maniacal as he said, “He may as well be.”

I quickly sliced off his other wing and whispered, “Where is he?”

“He is with Sebastian. You will not be allowed to take him back. He is no longer your guardian.”

“Maybe not,” I said and plunged the sword into him with every last ounce of strength inside me. “But I am his.”

He smiled at me. “You are darker than all of us,” he said, his laughter fading into silence.

***

It took me a moment before I could regain my bearings. I was still not entirely comfortable with my transformation. Buried deep down was the knowledge that I needed to remain on the side of the Faithful. However, much closer to the surface was the fear I would not be able to escape the hold of the Exiled.
The darkness that had permeated my being played tricks on me.
I saw a dark future for myself; I saw the anger and rage that consumed me. I longed for my father, for his advice and knowledge and I feared he wouldn’t be able to reach me. Not while I was submerged in shadows. But I couldn’t allow the thought to distract me from my goal. I needed to find Ethan, destroy Lucas and get rid of Sebastian once and for all.

The sword in my hand felt heavier than mine but since I had no idea what Lucas had done with it, this one would have to do. A few feet down the hall, the stone passageway made a sharp left that led to a set of steep, narrow stairs. I took them two at a time. At the top were two passages, one ahead and one to the right. I knew one would lead me to Sebastian. The fact that I didn’t know which suddenly put me on edge.

I’d tried to remain clear on my objective, drilling it into my brain the past few days and now that I was out of my chains and ready for confrontation, the simple matter of navigation threw me for a loop. I needed to get a handle on this. My eyes flicked from corridor to corridor until I was dizzy. My breathing got heavy and I crouched, head leaning on the sword, trying to clear my head.
What was happening to me
?

Samantha. I am here.

Dad?
I’d been so sure he couldn’t reach me here. I didn’t think he could while I was so dark.

Which way do I go
?
Dad, help me.

Samantha. I am so sorry. I wish I could be there, to help guide you.

You can
!
Just tell me what I need to do.

I cannot.

Why
?
Dad, please
!

This is your destiny. Your choices determine the course.

But I don’t know which way. I need to save Ethan
!

Think Samantha. Think about Ethan. Focus on him and you will find him. You can find him if you clear your head. Sebastian expects Ethan to return to him and
ask for forgiveness
.

What do you mean ‘return to him’
?
Why would Ethan need to ask Sebastian for forgiveness
?

You know the answer.

I was so sick of the damned riddles!
I don’t know the answer and I don’t know what is happening to me, dad.

Your transformation is almost complete. You will be the one who walks between both dark and light.

Wasn’t that the same thing Sebastian had said?
I need your help finding Lucas. He betrayed me. I need your help when I confront him. I can’t do this on my own.

I cannot because it is revenge you seek. The Faithful do not follow paths forged from vengeance. You must do this not out of hate but of love.

Was he abandoning me? I shook my head in frustration. He wasn’t allowed do this to me. Everyone I loved was gone. He couldn’t be gone, too.
I have to do this
!
I have to make them pay for what they did to you, for what they are probably doing to Ethan. How can you not help your own daughter
?

It hurts me to be unable to help you with this. You have to look beyond the hate and find the real reason for your anger. Anger fueled by love will not condemn you. Anger in spite of love makes you no better than those you seek to destroy. Everything you need is inside you. Trust yourself and you will find what you seek.

What do you mean
?
What am I looking for
?

He didn’t answer. He was gone and I was no closer to the answers I needed. How the hell was I supposed to do this alone? I was not strong enough. I was not ready. I held the pendant in my palm and stared at it like it was going to give me something. I mourned the loss of my father. I mourned Lucas’s betrayal. I mourned a beginning that was cut short. Ethan. What could’ve been something enlightening was cut short by Lucas’ betrayal, Sebastian’s manipulations.

A single inky tear fell on the Heart and it began to shine. Images rose from it like photographs. I saw my father, proud and happy. Though born into darkness, he remained Faithful to the final end. His loyalty to the Faithful was to be celebrated. He gave his life for all of ours. Snapshots of Lucas and the betrayal that showed through his eyes all along stung me. Betrayal I was never ready for. Betrayal I could never forgive. Other pictures of our friendship flashed quickly. That was what I was really mourning, the loss of my best friend, of my family. The betrayal was what fueled me but the love I had held me up.

A final image spun into sight. Ethan stood behind me on my right side, radiating bright white light.
Spread out behind him were
silver wings. I thought it odd considering Ethan didn’t have wings but, sure enough, he had them in this image. His eyes were focused on me and they were full of love. My father was the love that would always follow me. Lucas was the love that broke me and Ethan was the love that would heal me, put me back together and help me stay balanced. He would never let me fall into the depths of the Exiled.

The revelation hit me like bricks.
Tons of them.
I now knew which way to go.

I stood, prepared to meet my fate, and ran toward where I knew they were keeping Ethan. With every step, the pendant glowed brighter. I knew I was close. Two more Exiled met me in the narrow tunnel. I made quick work of dispatching them and raced on. Murmured voices grew louder with every stride. At the end of the tunnel, I came to a heavy wooden door.

It was identical to the door I’d passed through everyday for the last six months.
The door of the cabin.
They were the same. And they had the same markings and wood as the box. The carvings swirled and their whispers floated out to me, sounding like gibberish. My ears started to ring and I swiped at my clothes, feeling something crawling on me which I frantically tried to get rid of. The sounds and movements ceased the moment I put my hand on the door and pushed it open.

The room was large, reminding me of a church. Against the back wall was an altar of sorts. Above me, light streamed through dingy stained glass windows, giving the room a reddish glow. Despite the filthy windows, the lights were much brighter in there than the hallway and again I had to allow my eyes to adjust. Standing in the middle of the room, smiling at me with arms wide open was Sebastian. Lucas was off to the left with a look of horror on his face. At his feet was a crumpled and unconscious Ethan.

I swiftly took in the surroundings then immediately threw my palm at Lucas and hurled him against the wall. When he hit the floor, I pulled him to me and dropped him like a doll at my feet.

“Samantha, what a delight!
We were just speaking of you.” Sebastian’s handsome face faded back and forth between beauty and monster.

“I’m here now. Let Ethan go.”

“We’ve gone over this, silly girl. Give me the pendant and I will let one of you live.”

“Why didn’t you just take it? You had me locked up long enough.”

“It seems there was a snag. You see, I did try to remove it from your neck but—” He held up his blistered hands. “—as long as you are alive, it is not for me to take. You must give it to me. Something I, of course, should have foreseen but, lesson learned.”

“Why didn’t you just kill me then?”

He lifted his chin and smiled at me. “Well, I would have but you are so...interesting. Your existence has been whispered about for so long, we all thought you were a myth. I thought I would get to know you first, make you see reason. With you at my side, there is nothing we cannot accomplish.”

“Wanna be friends now, Sebastian?”

“Friends, partners, enemies.
It’s all the same to me. There is also the little fact that I can’t figure out how to actually kill you. Of course, I will find out the why’s and how’s and then remedy the situation. But, for now, we are at an impasse of sorts.
Unless, of course, you agree to join me.”
He smiled charmingly, bowing, just a little towards me as if he were some kind of gentleman.

I looked at Ethan, limp on the floor. “Will you let him go?”

Sebastian threw his hands in the air in mock exasperation. “What
is
it with you? What on earth do you have to gain from saving him? If it’s pleasure you want, then pleasure I have to give. Let me show you what you have to gain from joining me.”

The sheer perversion of his words made my stomach turn. “I love him. Let him go and I will give you the Heart of Hope.”

“Love him? What do you know of love? You
are
, indeed,
a silly girl. You love Lucas. You love Ethan. You cannot make up your mind, can you? I can see into that black hole you call a heart and I see nothing but hatred and revenge. You can’t know love if you draw your strength from hate. I am surprised
Daddy
didn’t tell you that. I mean, really, why save
this
one?
Because he’s your guardian angel?
They are a dime a dozen. At least one a day pledges his allegiance to me. Or better yet, join me and you won’t need an angel to keep you safe.”

I hated the egotistical bragging that dripped from his lips.

“I won’t join you, Sebastian. You know that. And if all you see inside me is hate, then why did you flinch when I mentioned love? You know I have it in me. You know I walk the thin line between the Exiled and the Faithful. The longer I remain in the dark, the tighter hope holds me. I’ve had time to sort things out in that dungeon you left me in. I know now this is how it’s supposed to be. I am of both worlds, Sebastian.” I stepped over Lucas so I was face to face with Sebastian. “But you already knew that, didn’t you?”

I allowed him to reach down and take the sword from me. He walked over to the altar, put it down and lifted my sword, made of crystallized seawater and rock. It shined like a beacon, much like the pendant that hung from my neck. He turned the sword over in his hands a few times, admiring it, inspecting it. The box lay open on the altar. He closed it then walked toward me, stopping halfway between us.

“We seem to have hit a wall, Samantha. I cannot let Ethan go, you see. We haven’t had time to properly catch up. He was certainly surprised to learn that dear old dad was the leader of the Exiled.”

“So you told him?”

“I did. You knew?”

“I figured it out recently. His mother gave him up out of love and you killed her.”

“I did. I couldn’t find him for a long time. When I did, I saw that he was not the impressionable lad I had hoped for so I focused my attention on the one who was.”

“Lucas.”

“You are correct! Yes, my vulnerable nephew. He was eager enough, hungry enough, for the attention I offered that he hung on my every word. It wasn’t hard. My brother and his wife were so focused on directing Ethan toward the Faithful, so focused on making sure he left all the darkness he was born into behind him, that they failed to spend the same time with their own son. They forgot that remaining Faithful is a choice. They never gave Lucas a reason to choose.”

“And you did.”

“Very perceptive.
I just showed him all he could become under my...tutelage, shall we say? Every time he doubted the path, I was there to whisper in his ear. Every time he thought he loved you, I was there to point out what was simmering between you and Ethan. And that drove him closer to me. Before long, he grew to hate Ethan and all his righteous beliefs.” He walked about me in circles, lazily touching my hair, my face as he did. “After all, Lucas was granted his wings. Where were Ethan’s? How could Ethan be chosen as a guardian angel, let alone
your
guardian angel, if he hadn’t even earned his wings yet? Had no one to grant them? Yes. It was easy. And that thin line humans speak of, the one between love and hate, all it took was the tiniest jiggle and Lucas leapt over it. He hates you, you know.
Hates you almost as much as he hates Ethan.
And it’s the most delightful thing I’ve ever seen.”

The anger that poured out of me all those times before was there, and I was prepared to unleash it, but was held back by what my father told me:
Anger fueled by love will not condemn you. Anger in spite of love makes you no better than those you seek to destroy.
And I wanted to be better than Sebastian, better than those Exiled who took advantage of their position. There must be balance in order for peace to reign. There was a place for the Exiled.
Just as there was a place for the Faithful.
Sebastian failed to realize that. The Exiled needed us as much as the Faithful need them. The hard pill of reality didn’t go down easy but there it was. By destroying all the hope in the word, the Exiled would eventually destroy
themselves
. A little fact Sebastian had kept for himself, I was sure.