T'on Ma (15 page)

"I'd like that very much," Liam agreed. "But is there room for one more in here?"

"Sure," Paul said. "You can bunk in with us."

"Well, all right then." Liam stood up. "I brought a few things with me." Motioning to Jake, the two went outside and quickly returned bearing two bulky burlap sacks tied off with string.

Setting them on the table, Liam opened the first one. "Let's see. There's some canned peaches." He set four cans down on the table while May cooed over them. "I've got some smoked ham, five pounds of butter, some apples. They're a little worse for wear, but I bet they'll make a fine pie." Each item he produced was met with oohs and aahs and the sound of smacking lips. Everyday fare at the fort was luxury for the homesteaders. "There's some light flour and cinnamon. And, Joshua, for you I got some really fine tobacco. Oh, yes. Here is a little bit of whiskey. Enough for a celebration, I believe."

Liam looked around at the beaming faces. He rarely got to be the beneficiary of so much largesse, and he truly enjoyed himself - even though the food cost him almost a week's wages, and he took all of his accumulated leave to bring it to them. He looked at Lana, but, to his disappointment, she refused to meet his gaze.

"I've got to hug your neck," May warned him, just before she hugged him tight enough to take his breath away.

"I'm glad you like this," he laughed as he stepped back. "I'd have brought more, but my horse couldn't carry all of that and me."

"Don't you worry about it," May smiled. "This will do just fine. Just fine."

May shooshed the men out of the kitchen, telling them to find 'something to do outside' while the women fixed the feast. Stepping through the door, Liam untied his horse and led it to the barn for a well-deserved rubdown. The others followed him.

"So, Nathan, when do you figure on getting married?" Liam asked as he slipped the saddle from his horse.

"The sooner the better, I reckon," Nathan grinned.

"Where are you getting a preacher?"

Liam's question stopped Nathan. He hadn't thought that far ahead. "I don't know."

"You could always come to the fort and have the chaplain marry you."

"That's a good idea!"

"We'll have to wait till it warms up a bit before we travel that distance," Joshua interjected. "Maybe March or April."

"That long?" Nathan frowned.

"Steady, boy," Joshua grinned. "That long."

In the kitchen, amidst all the cooking, the three women chattered about the wedding. "I wish we had material to make you a new dress," May sighed.

"That would be nice," Christina agreed. "But it's not necessary. It's not what I'm getting married in that matters. It's who I'm getting married to." Looking at Lana, who seemed a little distracted, she asked, "Isn't that right?"

"Oh, yes. Absolutely right," Lana looked across the table and smiled. "We might come up with something between now and then. You just never know."

Christina waited until May's back was turned and walked over to Lana. "What's the matter? Aren't you happy for us?"

"Christina, I am so happy for you." Lana hugged her neck. "This talk about weddings has got me missing Centas Yi. That's all."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'll be fine." With that, the two young women turned their attention back to the feast.

And what a feast it was! May had outdone herself with a pheasant pie. The apples had been cored, lightly buttered, and covered with molasses. They were then tightly covered in a Dutch oven, which was set in the hot embers. The lid was covered with coals to bake the apples to a bubbly sweetness. Lima beans simmered with chunks of smoked ham and wild onion. Melted butter made the inevitable cornbread even more delicious.

During dinner, the conversation continued to be about wedding plans. Christina was delighted to learn that they were to be married at the fort. When Liam found out that her one wish was to have a wedding dress, he suggested that one of the wives at the fort could make her dress for her. Liam would make sure it would be waiting for her when she got there.

"But I have no way to pay for it," Christina explained. "I have nothing."

"Let that be my wedding present to you, then," Liam offered.

"Oh, I couldn't," Christina started to protest.

"Please. The winter can be very boring at a fort. The women will enjoy having a wedding to plan for. Especially if they make the dress."

"Thank you," Nathan chimed in and then winked at Christina. "We can't deprive all those people of that much fun, now can we?"

"No. I suppose not," Christina agreed. "Thank you, Liam, for everything."

"My pleasure."

"How will they know what size to make it?" Christina looked worried at May.

"You leave that to me, dear," May smiled. "That's no problem."

After dinner, the whiskey appeared and Joshua and Liam filled their pipes with the aromatic tobacco. Everyone - even Jake - got at least a sip of the whiskey. It made for a very lighthearted group. As Lana walked by the table, Liam stopped her and pulled her by the wrist down to the chair next to him.

"You've been flitting around all day," he said. "Sit here and keep me company while I smoke this pipe."

"Liam, please." Lana looked down at her hands, suddenly feeling awkward.

Joshua studied the two.
So, that's how it is,
he thought to himself.
Liam's interested and she's not. That can be remedied.

"Please what?" Liam asked Lana. When he didn't get an answer, he continued. "I've been meaning to ask you how you've been doing since the last time I saw you."

"Me? I'm doing fine. Why?"

"Oh, I don't know. You just seem kind of lost. I've been worried about you."

"There's no need to worry. Really." Giving him a small smile, she stood up and walked across to her new room. "I'm turning in now. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, sweetheart," Joshua called after her. Once her door closed, he announced that Paul and Jake needed to turn in, too.

"I suppose you men want to sit and jaw," May smiled. "Christina, why don't you and I call it a day as well?"

"Yes'm." Christina stood up but, before she could walk away, Nathan pulled her down to give her a quick kiss.

"Goodnight, bride-to-be," Nathan whispered. She blushed all the way to the room she shared with Lana. She wasn't used to Nathan kissing her in front of his parents.

Joshua and Liam continued smoking their pipes and Nathan nursed a shot of whiskey while they listened to the sounds of the house settling down for the night. Once it grew quiet, Liam spoke, keeping his voice low.

"I want to ask you about Lana," he told Joshua. "I wasn't simply making conversation when I said I've been worried about her."

"I know." Joshua knocked the ashes out of his pipe. "I've been worried about her, too."

"We all have," Nathan added. "She hasn't been herself ever since the Apache took her."

"I know she was almost raped," Liam told them. "That's probably part of her trouble."

"What?"
Joshua spoke louder than he intended. Quickly lowering his voice, he repeated. "What? She never told me that."

"Last time I was here, she fell apart and told me quite a bit. More than she meant to, I imagine. I don't think she told you a lot about what happened. Nathan knows more than the rest of us, but I don't think even he's aware of everything."

"I know more than I want to," Nathan shook his head. "She really thinks she's in love with that Kiowa, Centas Yi. And he says he loves her. He intends to marry her."

"Over my dead body," Joshua growled. "That girl has no sense whatsoever!"

"I've tried talking to her, Pa. But I don't think it did much good. She's too sad to listen."

"She'll listen by the time I'm finished with her," Joshua said angrily.

"No. Wait a minute," Liam interrupted. "Maybe it would help if I said something." His eyebrows raised in speculation. "I mean, I'm not her father."

"Yeah. Maybe," Joshua conceded. "But if she doesn't listen to you, then I'm next."

With breakfast over, Nathan and Paul went hunting, hoping for venison. May and Christina disappeared into May's room to discuss more wedding plans and to measure Christina for her new dress. Joshua took Jake to the barn to exercise and groom the horses. That left Liam and Lana in the main room, Lana trying desperately to keep busy.

"Sit down," Liam invited.

"No. I've got some mending to do."

"So do your mending here." He patted the spot on the table next to him.

"Liam, please."

"You know, you said that last night. Please what?"

"Please leave me alone," she sighed wearily.

"Why? Am I bothering you?"

"No. I just don't want to have a certain conversation with you again. That's all."

"I see." Liam pushed back from the table and began filling his pipe. "By 'a certain conversation,' I assume you mean Centas Yi."

"Yes."

"All right. I won't talk to you about him. But I do need to talk to you."

"And not about how you feel," she warned.

Liam was starting to get perturbed. "No, Lana. Not about how I feel, either."

"All right, then." She picked up her mending basket and carried it to the table, where she sat beside Liam.

"Do you know how worried your family is about you?" he opened.

"Worried about me? Why?"

"You're too sad and withdrawn. I know you told me some of what happened with the Apaches, but you haven't told them. Have you?"

"No, not everything," she admitted.

"It might help if you did. You know. Get it all out."

"Liam, some of that is too awful. I don't want to remember it, let alone talk about it."

"You might not want to," he agreed, "but you need to." He paused for a moment, watching her hands as she sewed. "After everyone else had gone to bed, I mentioned last night about the Apache who tried to rape you. Your father and Nathan had no idea. They about fell out of their chairs."

"You did
what?"
She looked up, alarmed.

"I'm sorry. I thought they already knew. But that's what I mean. They don't understand what you survived. If they did, they could help you get through all of this."

"I don't mean to worry them. I really don't." Her eyes were wide in their sincerity.

"I know you don't, Lana, but you've got to help them help you. If that makes any sense."

"A little." She finished with one shirt and picked up another.

"There's something else, too." Liam said.

"What?"

"I need to tell you about how the Kiowa live."

"No. You said we wouldn't talk about Centas Yi."

"And we won't. This is about the Kiowa in general. It's what I know from living out here. I wonder if you realize what they are like, how they reason, how their women are treated. That type of thing."

"I know quite a bit."

"Granted. But do you know enough?"

"Like what?"

"They have a reputation far and wide for stealing horses, women and children. They attack settlers on a frequent basis. They are ferocious and dangerous with very little regard for human life."

"Ferocious and dangerous?" She shook her head. "I haven't seen that, and I've been to their camp."

"One camp. Once. On a trading mission where they knew you," Liam countered. "You walk into one where you
aren't
known and see what happens."

He could tell from her expression that she didn't believe him, so he went on. "Did you know they can have more than one wife?"

"No, I didn't."

"Kiowa women have no say in anything, either." Liam continued pressing his point.

"And that's different from my life? My mother's?" She watched his face, knowing he couldn't refute that. "No. It isn't," she continued. "However, unlike my mother, Kiowa wives own their own homes and property. Not the husbands. That's how the power is balanced out. In my world, the women have nothing unless their husbands choose to give it to them."

Liam frowned and then tried another tack. "Their religion and yours are very different, too."

At that, she simply shrugged. "We
all
pray, Liam."

"Maybe, but to whom?"

Lana clenched her jaws and stared down at the floor, refusing to be drawn into an argument on religion and faith.

Gamely, Liam tried again. "You can't be blind to the prejudice that the settlers have against them."

"I know it's there, but I can't do anything about that."

"No. But it will hurt you if you become Kiowa."

"Now you sound like Nathan."

"Do I? Has he told you what it will be like if you live with the Kiowa? How you will be an outcast among your own people as well as theirs? How your children will be half-breeds and live a life even worse than your own?"

The stubborn set of her jaw made him angry. "Lana, don't be naïve! For a white man to live with a squaw pushes him to the very fringe of society. But you let a white woman
choose
to be a squaw," he stopped for a minute, trying to find the right words. "Lana, in many ways, she'd be better off dead."

"Stop! Just stop!" Lana sprang to her feet, angry, her hands over her ears. "I've heard enough." She took a few steps away from the table, but then spun around to face him, her hands making enraged gestures.

"I can't help it that I love Centas Yi. It doesn't matter if he's Kiowa or the King of Siam! Do you hear me? The Kiowa may have a ruthless reputation, but he is kind and gentle and he loves me!"

"I wasn't going to talk about him, but since you've brought him up, there's something you need to know about your 'gentle' Kiowa," Liam growled as he, too, stood up.

"I recently got back from an escort detail to San Antonio. While I was there, a band of Apache was stealing women in the area to sell in Mexico. I was ordered to give chase. We didn't catch them, but we got close. Very close. Guess who was with the raiding party."

He took a few steps to stand in front of her.

"Don't want to?" he snapped. "Well, then, I'll tell you. Centas Yi! Capturing and selling women."