Tomorrow Will Be Too Late (28 page)

No
,
we don’t, or at least you
don’t,
Kate felt very tempted to say. Of course Justin reacted to the photo
;
seeing the woman who caused him so much grief must have prompted some
kind
of reaction. And love seemed like a very
far-fetched
choice of words
to describe his feelings, by any means.

‘So
,
it’s not such a whirlwind romance after all, you sneaky little beast.’ Alice bought the whole thing, she could tell. She wasn’t that stressed anymore, her eyes
mischievous
as she glanced at Kate’s packed overnight bag, neatly tucked away under the kitchen table. Justin would be coming to pick her up later in the evening, after yet another meeting he had to attend downtown.

She had to think of the last four days, a sense of desolation threatening to destroy her mood.
S
he had seen very little of him,
his planned vacation cut short with some unexpected last
-
minute negotiations that had to be completed before he could move his project to Africa. At least
,
that was what he told her, apologetically and sounding really rueful as far as she could tell
, a
s if he really meant it.

She’d seen him twice, both times in public and for no more than half an hour. She had a strong suspicion that if it wasn’t for the image he was so determined for them to uphold, even that wouldn’t have happened. He did look tired, she mulled, remembering his face as if he
were t
here, sitting next to her.
On the strictly physical level
,
they
hadn’t gotten
anywhere near anything beyond a kiss. And even
that
was rather hurried and over with before it truly started. She should have been happy
,
of course. Her madness
had
lasted only
twenty-four
hours, the realization of what she had actually done dawning upon her and filling her with shameful horror.
His unexpected extra load of work was certainly a blessing, all things considered. If only she could make herself see it this way, it would be great. Instead
,
she found herself increasingly restless, her thoughts travelling to him more often than she would have wished it to happen.

She’d been busy too, of course. True to his promise, Dr. Merkle made sure she had her appointment with the oncologist booked the very next day after their conversation. It confirmed the good news, totally scraping away the horror of the mistaken prognosis. She felt happy and relieved
,
of course. Still, she couldn’t help but blame herself for her impulsive reaction to the news, her face warming at the memory of what
had
transpired between her and Justin.

‘D
id you pack anything special?’ H
er sister’s voice broke into her unhappy musing, the spark in her eyes making it clear she wasn’t inquiring about her toothbrush.

‘
Well
, two nice dresses for the evening meal
s
.
Otherwise
,
just the regular stuff, since we’re supposed to go beachcombing, have a bonfire
,
and
do
all kind of rather outdoorsy things.’ She pretended to have misunderstood, the fact
that
her black silk nightgown with gossamer lace and spaghetti straps lay hidden at the bottom of her bag not something she was willing to share with anyone
, her
sister included.

It worked, Alice’s exasperated face making her laugh, the happy careless sound surprising to her own ears. She
hadn’t
really laugh
ed
in quite a while, she
thought
wistfully, the last week
being particular
ly
bad
.
Yet, in those brief moments with Justin she
had
felt almost happy
.
Something about him made it impossible to be miserable, the memories of
their
night together still fresh in her
mind
. She should have been totally devastated and unable to think of anything else but her impe
n
ding doom. Instead
,
she
had
found heaven in his embrace, the sheer happiness and sense of well
-
being forming a protective shield around her, bulletproof and strong enough to ricochet her unhappy thoughts.

She still kept thinking about it when Justin
arrived
at her place, his casual elegance making her glad she put an effort into her outfit. Her simple bluebell
-
colored
dress and
low-heeled
sandals seemed almost coordinated with his pale grey shirt and charcoal jeans.

‘We match
,
’ he grinned, his eyes very blue with joy. ‘Coordinated outfits will make a huge statement, Kate. Ready to go?’

She noticed he didn’t linger at her place, his rush to get her out as he lifted her small traveling bag making it very clear he didn’t particularly look forward to being alone with her after all. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting, but it was certainly more than this polite
,
impersonal greeting as she found herself ushered to the door.
How about a kiss?
s
he
asked
herself,
the fact she was being ridiculous with her expectations doing little to mollify her.
Was he afraid she would throw herself into his arms and beg him to make love to her? Given their history, he just might harbor
that
thought, she had to admit, however embarrassing it was. She
had
made it pretty clear what she expected from their fake relationship, her assertive attitude most probably not something he was used to from his other lovers.

‘So
,
how do you feel about the weekend?
’
H
e chatted her up after she settled into the comfortable, leather seat of his sporty car. ‘Any jitters?’

She was fumbling with the buckle of her seatbelt, glad for the curtain of hair that hid her face and made it easier to lie.
‘No, no
ne whatsoever. How about you?’ S
he had
learned
from her mom a long time ago
, if
anyone asked
her
a question that wasn’t
particularly
easy to answer
,
it was best to turn the tables and respond with another one, gaining some time.

‘
Ditto
.
’
He
smiled again, the beauty of his masculine features making it hard to breathe. He had no right to be so good
-
looking, she thought almost resentfully, trying very hard to concentrate on the road ahead.

‘
Lucas is looking forward to meeting you,’ Justin continued, his
eyebrows knitted into one straight line as he added, his voice pensive
,
‘
and
however impossible it seems, Marcy’s attitude has already changed. She stopped bombarding me with phone calls and emails, which is a big improvement. I guess you are my lucky charm
,
after all.’ He laughed pleasantly, too distracted with the changing lights to notice her shrinking deeper into her seat.

Because she knew the real reason for this sudden change of heart
of
his scorned lover.
It had nothing to do with her and her presence in Justin’s life. Right now
,
Marcy must have been too busy planning her modeling agency to even consider not going along with Vic’s wishes.

Kate
listened to Justin’s voice, her chest painfully tight with the secret she had no desire to keep. Should she mention to him that Victoria would be there? Or the fact
that
she
had come
to
Kate’s
house for a heart
-
to
-
heart chat? She had been pondering
that
question back and forth over the last few days, never reaching a final conclusion. He had the right to know, she knew that much. But at the same time, she feared he might pull her into the abyss of blame and finger
-
pointing, not believing she had no part in this charade.

Was it really what she was most afraid of? Or rather
,
was it the nagging doubt he might just as well ask her to stay behind,
the idea of meeting his ex
-
wife not nearly as abhorrent as she expected it to be. Maybe he would actually be happy, looking forward to see Victoria? She thought of it in the early hours of the night, tossing and turning in her bed. After all
,
they ha
d
been married for over four years
.
Such
a
long time of proximity and intimacy must have woven some kind of a
n
emotional web that couldn’t be easily put behind. Maybe those two years apart
had
made him reconsider his choices? Wouldn’t her absence make things all too easy for everyone concerned? She could almost hear his polite, silky voice explaining he didn’t need her anymore, maybe even making a sarcastic comment how lucky she was to get off the hook when least expected
.

She couldn’t bear it. Even if it was a sham that wasn’t to last longer than absolutely necessary, she wasn’t ready to let it go. She kept desperately clinging to this pretense of togetherness that was nothing more
than
a bubble about to be burst.

‘Just in case
,
I’m planning to keep you real close for the whole weekend
.
’
His
hand left the wheel, briefly caressing her fingers. ‘
The
last few days were very insane
,
and I couldn’t keep my part of our agreement.’ He smiled wolfishly, his eyes dangerous. ‘
Which
I am planning to remedy as soon as we are done with the settling
-
in part. Don’t think I’ve forgotten the rules of our relationship quite yet, Kate.’

She had to get out of it and fast. For now
,
she could still think clearly enough to see how impossible it all was. If he kissed her, all would be lost, the web of mutual attraction immobilizing her again into a helpless pliable accomplice. Only
,
she couldn’t.
She
would leave it for later, she decided cowardly, once they arrived at the house. Who knew, maybe seeing Victoria would settle things without her having to do anything at all?

‘I still have no clue what to do around your friends,’ she said instead, her voice husky. ‘I mean, isn’t there anything I should know beforehand? Did you go into any details regarding us as a couple? It’s hard to believe they would swallow it so easily.’

‘They did, or at least Lucas.’
He grinned, his eyes back on the road. ‘As I told you
,
the wedding story holds it all beautifully together. We met, we talked
,
and boom, a true
coupe de foudre
.’

He laughed at her expression, his voice drawling as he explained
,
‘
It
simply
means
a
bolt of lightning in French. My father used to describe his falling for my mom just like that, kind of love at first sight.’

‘Lovely
,
’ she
sighed, thinking about what was about to go down. Because she knew Victoria would be there, ready to pounce on her chance to reclaim Justin, whatever it took. And she knew she had little chance to stay in her way. He might call it lightning or fire, but deep down both of them knew they had nothing but a tiny flame, barely alive.

‘Hey, don’t look so downcast
.’ H
is eyes turned serious as he glanced at her defeated face, his ability to read her almost scary. ‘
They
are nice people for
the
most part, really. Just a group of friends and business
acquaintances
, more or less. One thing I’ve
learned
from early on is to not let anyone intimidate you, be it with their position or money. How are the wedding preparations getting along?’
He
cleverly changed the topic
,
and for the rest of the ride they talked about Alice and Tom, some of his
anecdotes
about his friend’s earlier years making her laugh
. Justin seemed genuinely fond of him
,
and she had to ask herself again if he’d really go ahead with the expos
é
of her dirty past. Would he really ruin
Tom’s
day and his life
,
for
that
matter, just to satisfy his own need
for
a payback?