To Professor, With Love (14 page)

He paused before nodding and adding one last, slow, taunting, “You’re welcome.”

Instead of gushing out an apology or thanking him for everything he’d done, his boss only snorted. “If you came to tell me all the issues have been handled, then what the hell are you whining about?”

Noel jerked a hand off his hip and slapped the door. “I’m not getting paid to take care of your job and mine both. You’re lucky it’s not football season, or you’d be shit out of luck right now. I can’t keep doing this, Jess. And by the way, you’re scheduling it all fucked up. Steffie’s only signed up for two hours a week, while Gracie’s working her ass off with fifty.”

“So? I don’t like Steffie.”

“Well, you didn’t hire Steffie. Your dad did. And if you don’t want him to disown you after he gets back and find out how shitty of a job you’ve done, you’d better pull your head out of your ass and actually work once in a while.”

“I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“Just…” Stepping backward out of the office as if he couldn’t bear to talk to her a moment longer, Noel muttered, “Fix the damn schedules, will you? I can’t keep working this much. And hire another bartender while you’re at it. I need a night off, or some goddamn sleep, sometime this year.”

“I’d say so. You’ve turned into a fucking crab.”

“Jess,” he growled warningly.

“Jesus, if you’re so all-fired to get a better schedule and new bartender, then you take care of it. Seems like you’ve gotten used to running this place, anyway.”

The muscles in his back tensed, but he merely growled, “Fine. I will.”

“Oh, and here are the fucking notes everyone gives me, whining for all the days they want off.”

Noel stepped inside only to reemerge a moment later, his hand fisted around a ball of paper scraps. “Unbelievable,” he muttered, storming right toward me. But he seemed so mad he didn’t even notice me. I ducked out of the way just as he exited the hall and marched back behind the bar. Dumping the pile of notes onto the counter in the back, he began to organize them.

“Is a fuzzy navel made of peach or orange juice?” his clueless coworker asked a minute later.

“Both,” Noel answered without looking up. “Ice it, add one and a half ounces of peach schnapps and top that off with orange juice.”

“Thanks. What’re you doing, anyway?”

“Fixing the damn schedule.”

“Really? Hey, can you get me more than sixteen hours a week?”

Noel stopped what he was doing and lifted his face. “What the hell? She only put you in for sixteen hours a week? Figures.” He went back to work. “But yeah, you got it.” Then he paused and lifted a slip of torn paper to his eyes, squinting.

“Yo, Lowe,” he called as his coworker began to leave. “What’s this say?”

Lowe came back and took the sheet. He blinked and turned it upside down before handing it back. “No clue.”

Noel sighed and rubbed his face. “Great.”

“Noel, table eight needs refills.”

He glanced at the waitress who’d approached. “Sure. Oh! Hey, Mandy. Can you read this?”

He let her look it over while he pulled up a round of bottled beers.

With an apologetic smile, she shook her head and gave the paper back. “Sorry, sweetie. But it looks like Julia’s handwriting if that helps.”

“Julia,” he murmured, scanning the tables. “She’s not working tonight, is she?”

“Nope.” Mandy grabbed the beers and was gone.

He looked so defeated as he set the note on the bar and shook his head, I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t handle seeing him like this. He worked so hard, at everything. The guy needed a break. Or better yet, he needed my help.

“Let me see,” I said and came in close enough to slide the paper across the bar away from him. “I’m used to trying to decipher sloppy handwriting.”

When he glanced up and only blinked at me, I sent him a nervous smile, rolling my eyes. “And usually it’s other professors’ penmanship, not students, that are the worst.”

A breath rushed from his lungs. “What’re you doing here?”

Ignoring the questions because I couldn’t handle the answer, I studied the slip of paper before looking up. He looked so thunderstruck, I was actually afraid of the force of joy that pulsed through me. I should not get a thrill out of pleasing him, but oh God, I felt like a junkie. I had to do more to make him smile.

“It says ‘need off every Friday for son’s ballgames.’” Then I glanced away, unable to take the pressure I felt in my chest from simply looking into his periwinkle eyes.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

“What you risk reveals what you value.” - Jeanette Winterson,
Written on the Body

~NOEL~

“You came back.” The words echoed though my head. She’d come back. Holy shit. Aspen had come back to Forbidden.

She handed the slip of paper back to me. “Yeah, I...I...”

“Thirsty for some more Bud Light Lime?” I guessed, making sure my fingers touched hers when I retrieved the note.

She flushed green and sent me a horrified glance. “God, no.” But even as she shook her head, her fingers seemed to slide deliberately over the outside of my thumb when she retracted her hand. God damn. I shuddered from the obscene amount of pleasure it gave me. “I don’t think I could drink that particular poison again for quite a while. I’ll just stick with cola tonight.” When she seated herself, telling me she planned to stay awhile, my heart almost cracked itself open it beat against my chest so hard.

I nodded and tossed the work memo aside before setting my hands on the counter between us. “You know, they make a mean cola just across the street at that
non
-alcoholic restaurant there. It’s cheaper too.”

She nodded and slipped off her stool, getting to her feet. “You’re right. I don’t...I don’t know what I’m doing here. I should go.”

Oh, hell no. I caught her hand just as she touched the bar to push away from it. Trapping it against the countertop, I waited until she lifted her large, startled gaze. “Don’t go. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have teased. I just wanted to hear you admit you were here because of me.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Why? Because you like to torture me?”

“No.” I shook my head, feeling plenty tortured enough for the both of us. “Because it would’ve made my entire day.”

She glanced away. When she dismissed me entirely and dug into her purse to pull out her phone, my disappointment almost ate me alive. She was probably telling her date to hurry his ass up because she didn’t want to be stuck here alone with me a second longer than she had to be.

If she’d agreed to give Dr. Chaplain another chance, even though he was already fucking engaged, I didn’t know how I would handle that. Probably very badly.

But about as soon as she put her phone away, my butt vibrated. Frowning, I tugged my phone from my back pocket and scowled at the unknown number. Curious to see who was texting me, I opened the message and my mouth fell open when I read what was written.

I AM here because of you
.

“Oh.” The air rushed from my lungs.
Fuck
. The pleasure, and longing, and anxiety that roared through me was way more intense than I wanted it to be. I looked up at her.

She bit her lip and stared back, and this overwhelming sensation roared to life inside me.

God, she just had to go and do this, didn’t she? “You know, I was fully prepared to leave you alone. You convinced me this was a bad idea. I wasn’t going to gamble your entire career away just for my own pleasure. But you coming here tonight...” I blew out a breath and shook my head. “That’s a little too tempting to resist.”

Her eyes filled with panic. Lifting her chin regally, she said, “There’s nothing wrong with stopping at a bar for a drink.”

I leaned in until I could get a whiff of lavender oozing off her. Then I tilted my head to the side and grinned. “No, there’s nothing wrong with that at all.”

She sat down slowly, her gaze leery, as if she suspected I had an ulterior motive. I sent her an innocent smile, but she only narrowed her gaze more. Paranoid woman. I loved how easy it was to make her suspicious.

“I’ll be right back with your...cola.”

Turning away, I hummed to myself as I pulled down a cup and opened the ice chest.

“Thought you said you
weren’t
sleeping with your teacher.”

I looked over to catch Lowe sending me a curious sidelong glance as we both scooped glasses into the ice. He lifted his eyebrows. “Not that it’s any of my business or I’m judging or anything,” he was quick to add. “You just sounded pretty adamant the other night that you weren’t.”

“What makes you think she’s my teacher?” I evaded, curious to know how he’d come to such a conclusion. Risking a peek over my shoulder, I took her in. In blue jeans and a cashmere top with her hair pulled up in a perky ponytail, she looked like an undergraduate. Not a single professor vibe seeped from her.

Lowe just grinned. “My girlfriend and I take World Masterpieces from Dr. Kavanagh together. And Ten said her name the first night I worked here, so...” He let me figure out the rest of his deductive reasoning for myself.

Well, shit. If one guy could figure us out so effortlessly, then how easy would it be for anyone else to? Just how perilous to her job was it for me to even talk to her?

Feeling fiercely protective, I scowled at Lowe. “I think you’re reading too much into something that’s not there.” The look in my eyes and tone in my voice told him to back the hell off.

“Hey, you don’t have to worry about me.” He lifted his hands, trying to tell me everything between us was cool. “I wouldn’t say anything, and besides, I was just teasing you.”

No.
Ten
teased me, thinking I wasn’t even interested in her. I could tell Lowe
knew
I actually was.

I looked her way, every muscle in my body tense. I didn’t want to cause her trouble. I didn’t want some guy I barely knew and couldn’t trust yet getting her into trouble either. But then she turned her attention our way as if she could feel my gaze on her, and we made eye contact. Christ, but I couldn’t stay away from her either. The pull I felt toward this woman was crazy, and I knew I should fight it, but I kept forgetting why.

When the tops of her cheeks flushed and she darted her glance away, I jerked my elbow Lowe’s way. “She doesn’t seem to recognize you from one of her classes.” And that’s when it hit me. Aspen
didn’t
recognize Lowe. In fact, she didn’t even seem to be aware of him working alongside me.

Since the bastard had started, every woman had skipped over me to check him out first. Without fail. Everyone but Aspen. She didn’t even realize he existed because she was busy sneaking another discreet glance my way.

Heat seized me. I wanted to go to her, and grab her, and just...brand her as mine. Such barbaric, caveman urges had never afflicted me before, but they roared to life now. She preferred me over Mason Lowe. Hot damn. Made me want to prefer her over every woman I’d ever known too.

Or maybe she just hadn’t really looked at him yet. A scowl marred my brow as I studied her. I didn’t like the self-doubt these thoughts caused. I hadn’t experienced anything like it since I’d been here. In Ellamore, I was treated like royalty. Strangers loved me for my football skills. Ladies loved me for my looks. And guys loved me for my cool-ass attitude. I never had to wonder who thought I was a piece of trash, because they told me I was amazing. Until Aspen Kavanagh came along. And now the uncertainty was creeping its way under my skin and making me itch for answers.

Her fingers tapped idly against the countertop to the beat of the music playing as if she was waiting for something. For me.

But I didn’t go to her.

“Hey, you take care of her for a little while,” I told Mason, tugging the drink from his hand and handing him the one in mine so we could trade places.

He sent me a surprised glance. I didn’t give him a chance to refuse, because I was already delivering his order to his customer. I barely paid the middle-aged guy any notice as I covertly watched every move Lowe made. He approached Aspen and set her soda on the counter. She turned to him with a ready smile, which only faltered when she discovered
he
was serving her. Then she glanced my way and I rushed to look busy.

Lowe stuck around for a couple minutes, saying something I couldn’t hear from my end. She responded with a nod and vague smile. His posture turned flirtier than I’d ever seen it before, and I had to scowl, ready to kick his ass. What the hell did he think he was doing?

Instead of batting her lashes at him, or blushing, or even—God, help me—giggling, Aspen merely slid her gaze to me. Jesus, she sat right in front of Catnip Lowe and her eyes still wandered my way. I wasn’t quite sure how to deal with this. Awareness spiked through me and I wanted to claim my woman so badly I actually balled my hands into fists to fight the urge. Tugging her attention back to Lowe as if it took everything she had to focus on what he was saying, she nodded and replied to whatever he’d asked.

I rested my hands on the bar to catch my breath. It felt as if I’d just run a mile. And my skin was alive with this oversensitive prickly sensation. Jesus, I hoped I wasn’t breaking out into hives. It wasn’t exactly the most comfortable feeling. It was too new to be cozy, but I craved more of it. I wanted to look at her again just to hoard up more of the rush that just looking at her gave me.

“So, did she pass your test?” Lowe asked quietly as he appeared at my side.

I hadn’t even realized I had been testing her until that moment, but hell, she’d passed. “With flying colors,” I uttered. Jesus. I glanced sideways at him, needing help. Seriously. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now? I shouldn’t—” What was I saying? I couldn’t confide in Lowe about this. The less people who knew, the better. But I kept blustering, because I was so damn rattled. I needed some kind of guidance. “We can’t—”

He patted my back dolefully. “It’s always the one you shouldn’t want that you end up wanting the most.”

With a lift of my eyebrows, I waited for him to elaborate. He didn’t. He just sent me a knowing grin and leaned in confidentially close. “But if she’s worth it, nothing else matters. You’ll find a way. And you’ll sacrifice whatever needs to be sacrificed to get there.”

Realizing he was talking about him and his girlfriend, I watched him thoughtfully as he turned away and stacked a couple dirty glasses into a tub to be taken to the back for washing. I swear he’d just given me his blessing to mess around with my freaking professor.

If she’s worth it
, his words rumbled through my head. I sent her a glance, and everything perked to attention. No one had ever affected me the way this woman did. She stole the breath from my lungs with a single glance, and made me feel more alive and more aware of every sense I possessed than anyone I’d ever met. She could even piss me off more than anyone else had ever pissed me off before. She had a power over me that should’ve scared the shit out of me, but it only drew me to her harder.

“You seriously like being with just one girl?” I grabbed Lowe’s arm when he tried to pass by. “Monogamy, and relationships, and all that shit. Is it really worth it?”

He paused and lifted an eyebrow. After studying me thoughtfully for a moment, he grinned. “If it’s
the
girl, then hell yes.” Shrugging free of me, he took off down the hall toward the kitchen.

And I started toward Aspen without even thinking. I was halfway across the bar before I realized what I was doing. I was going to go after her, and I was going to make her mine.

But something on the television screen over the bar caught her attention. She tilted her head and squinted her eyes as if trying to hear what was being said. When her eyes widened and lips parted, I knew it was bad.

“What?” I demanded, stopping across from her at the bar and trying to crane my neck around to see the television.

The words on the bottom of the screen had my skin icing over with dread.
Ellamore Sex Scandal.

I sliced a look to Aspen. When she met my gaze, her face was sheet white. So I scrambled for the remote under the counter. When I found it, I pushed the closed caption button.

ESU assistant volleyball coach, Vander Wilson, was fired this afternoon for having illicit relations with freshman volleyball player, Allison Belfries. According to allegations, Wilson and Belfries’s affair started early in the season and lasted until this week when Wilson’s wife caught the two together. But when Wilson tried to end the relationship, Belfries went to the head coach to confess everything. University officials dismissed him immediately and have declined to make a comment at this time. More on that later
...

“I need to go,” Aspen gasped, jerking her purse off the bar as she hopped off her stool. “I can’t... This is... I’m sorry. Can I pay my tab now?”

I turned to her, already knowing what I’d see and dreading it. She wouldn’t even look at me. Her cheeks were stained with guilt and her throat worked as she swallowed convulsively.

“Aspen,” I started, ready to fight for her. But what the hell? I’d just decided she was worth it; why would the universe pull the rug out from under us like that?

“Don’t,” she pleaded, her voice strained and eyelashes damp.

I crumbled. Here, I’d been all prepared to argue our case. We weren’t like them. Neither of us was married; we weren’t being unfaithful. And if I remembered correctly, Coach Wilson was in his late thirties. He was probably twenty years older than Allison Belfries.

But the bleak, troubled, guilty gleam in Aspen’s green eyes reminded me our situation would probably be worse, actually. Volleyball wasn’t nearly as big of a deal at Ellamore as football was. And Aspen was actually one of my professors, responsible for giving me my literature grade. The media would make a hell of a lot bigger deal out of us than they would from some coach/player relationship. And it’d all fall back on her. She’d get the heat, the dirty names, the ruined future. She’d get everything, while I’d get off scot-free.

No matter how much I wanted her, no matter how amazing she made me feel, I couldn’t do that to her. The sacrificing part was all hers, not mine.

I hated that.

Taking a physical step back, I nodded my understanding and relinquished my fight to try to keep her. But God, it sliced me in two to let that hope go.

“Here’s your tab, Dr. Kavanagh.” Lowe appeared beside me, already back from his kitchen trip.

I knew he was probably trying to be helpful because he’d seen everything that had just happened. But his actions irritated me. I didn’t want anyone to know what was going on between us. And even more, I didn’t want him to realize how much this fucking hurt. Showing my vulnerabilities pissed me off. I wanted to ball my hand into a fist and punch Lowe in the face. Actually, any kind of violence to get this clawing sensation out of my chest would do. And since he was handy...