To Catch A Duke (5 page)

"Very well," she agreed,
trying to tamp down the small flare of hope that shot through her at the idea
that the duke would be escorting her about.
 
"And please, thank Lady Berkshire for me when you see her
next.
 
I do appreciate the gesture.
 
I shall thank Benjamin myself when I see him
next."

"I shall," Nicholas
promised, and Julia couldn't help but note the sadness in his eyes when she
mentioned the countess' name.
 
At one
time, Julia had thought there was something between her brother and lovely
earl's daughter, but then she had married the Marquess of Berkshire, a man
nearly five and forty years her senior.
 
If Nicholas had been heartbroken by the event, he had never shown any
outward sign of it.
 
Then again, she'd
been at Seldon Park for much of that time, so there was likely a great deal she
had missed.
 

Now, however, was not the time for
such thoughts.
 
Now she had to simply be
thankful for what she'd been given.
 
"Shall I expect the duke tomorrow then?"

"He said he would sent a
note."
 
Nicholas gave her a
lop-sided grin, though it did not reach his eyes as it normally would
have.
 
"I am sorry, Jules.
 
For all of it.
 
But Benjamin will take care of things.
 
He will make you happy.
 
He always does."
 
Then her
brother was gone, leaving her alone again.

Sitting back down at her dressing
table, Julia picked up her brush and started to work out the knots in her
hair.
 
The idea of Benjamin escorting
her places wasn't bothersome, precisely.
 
She knew she was perfectly safe.
 
Hadn't she just told Meggy that much?
 
Still, this new arrangement would require spending time with him at
balls and routs and the theater.
 
Assuming he took her to those places of course.

That might not be such a good
thing.

When she kept her distance, she was
able to pretend that Benjamin was little more than a brother to her.
 
If he was her near constant companion?
 
She wasn't quite so certain that she could
keep up the lie.
 
Either to herself or
to him.

Julia was still worrying over the
situation the next morning when she went downstairs for breakfast.
 
For once, she was thankful that Nicholas had
gone riding in the early hours of the day.
 
That would give her time to collect herself, for she'd dreamt of Benjamin
the night before.
 
That wasn't unusual,
really.

What was unusual was what they were
doing in her dream.
 
They were riding
through the fields of Seldon Park, the summer sun high overhead, laughing and
carrying on as they had as children.
 
But then they'd stopped, and, in her dream anyway, Benjamin had lifted
her down from her horse with practiced ease, and pulled her into his embrace,
kissing her deeply.
 
Even now, her heart
speeded up just thinking about it.

As Julia had never been kissed, the
meeting of their lips was pure imagination on her part, or rather on the part
of her mind that conjured up such heated fantasies.
 
Still, she had awoken in a sweat, her breasts tingling and with a
slight ache between her legs.
 
Those
were real, physical reactions to her dream, and she knew precisely what they
meant - keeping her attraction to Benjamin hidden wasn't going to be as easy as
she'd hoped.

Though she'd yet to complete a full
season, Julia had become something of a silent observer in the drawing rooms of
London.
 
Since she often hid in the
shadows because of her scars, she was also often in the unique position of
being able to overhear conversations that she knew were not always fit for a
young lady's ears.
 
She also knew a
great deal more about the physical attributes about the many men of the
ton
than was strictly proper, but then, gossipy women rarely noticed their
surroundings when they had a juicy tidbit to share, especially if it involved
the size of a man's cock.

Julia knew that the tinglings were
the beginnings of sexual arousal, and, though she was still a virgin, she had
spent almost her entire life in the country.
 
What happened between creatures of the opposite sex, especially when the
need to mate overtook them, was not precisely a mystery.
 
Benjamin stirred those same feelings in her,
and she knew she would do well to tamp them down, bury them where no one would
see them.
 
However, she found that she
could not.
 
Nor did she want to.

There was, of course, no hope, that
she made Benjamin feel the same way.
 
After all, he was a man in his prime, full of sexual prowess and
vitality.
 
She also knew that, at least
until recently, he'd had a string of mistresses, though he never kept one for
long, tiring of them easily.
 
Still, she
was also well aware that sometimes, when a man's needs went unfulfilled,
any
woman, even a scarred woman like her, would stir some feelings within him.
 
If she were able to do that?
 
Well, then it would be a pleasant memory she
could keep with her once she returned to the isolation of Seldon Park.

It had also occurred to Julia that
morning that when she returned to the country, there would not be another
chance to make memories, at least not memories like the ones she'd made the
last several months.
 
There would be no
more balls or musicales, and, though she'd known that all along, that morning,
the truth had been driven home in a way it hadn't before.
 
For her, there would never be another
opportunity to live in society.
 
Those
memories that she had now would have to suffice until the day she died.

So she'd done the only rational
thing possible and made a list in her mind of the things she'd like to do and
see before the season ended.
 
Riding in
Hyde Park in the early morning, just as the dawn was breaking was one the first
things on her list and probably the easiest to accomplish.
 
She would also like to take a carriage ride
with a man, presumably Benjamin, along Rotten Row at the fashionable hour, but
that might be hoping for too much.
 
Still, if things went well, she might be able ask him for the favor and
see if he responded favorably.

She also wanted to attend the
theater, something that she hadn't done thus far.
 
And dance two dances at a ball.
 
That was also a must.
 
There were
other things as well, but for the moment, she would be content with those
four.
 
She would also like to be kissed
but that would, of course, be going too far and hoping for too much.
 
She could never ask that of Benjamin, no
matter how much she might desire to do so.

She was so lost in thought that she
didn't hear the butler, Cosgrove, approach.
 
When he cleared his throat, she looked up to find him holding a silver
tray that contained a letter.
 
"For
you, my lady."

Julia reached up to pluck the
letter from the tray, unable to contain her excitement.
 
No one sent her letters.
 
Ever.
 
Breaking the seal, she quickly scanned the note.
 
It was from Benjamin, asking her to
accompany him on a drive that afternoon.
 
Excellent.
 
That was one of the
items on her list.
 
Hastily, she
scribbled a reply and gave Cosgrove instructions to have the note delivered.

The previous night, she had sworn
to herself that she would make these last few weeks of the season count.
 
There was no time like the present to get
started.

"You seem to be enjoying
yourself."
 
It was such an obvious
comment, but one that Benjamin couldn't help but make.
 
He'd arrived at Julia's Mayfair townhouse
fully expecting her to make him wait, as most young ladies of his acquaintance
would have.
 
Or perhaps simply refuse to
accompany him at all, despite her note of acceptance earlier in the day.
 
Instead, he'd found her ready to depart,
dressed in a lovely carriage gown of light green and bedecked with pale yellow
ribbons.
 
It was an eye-catching frock,
and he'd been more than a little surprised at her choice.

He'd assumed that, given what had
transpired the night before, Julia would eventually decide against the drive
through the park and along Rotten Row.
 
He'd been observing her quietly off and on throughout the season and,
thus far, he'd noticed her preference to sink into the shadows in an attempt to
hide.
 
She had made it abundantly clear
that she really did not wish to be seen.
 
Yet today, there was no way to avoid seeing her.
 
She glowed so brightly and seemed so full of
life that, had he not known better, he would have thought his long time friend
had been replaced by an identical twin.

"I am," she said simply,
and then sighed in what he could only describe as contentedness, if not sheer
bliss.
 
"This is lovely.
 
I had not quite anticipated how much I would
enjoy myself.
 
Or how lovely the fresh
air would be."
 
She seemed
completely unaware that the sun shone down on her skin, making it fairly glow,
and, though she wore a hat, it was rather small and not at all the proper thing
to wear for a day out in the elements.
 
Oddly, she did not seem to care, even though that meant that her scars
were in full view for anyone who looked at them.

And people were looking.
 
Some, in fact, were downright staring.

Benjamin wanted to scream at them
to stop that nonsense.
 
Or behead
them.
 
That would have been the
preferable, but undoubtedly a bit extreme, choice.
 
On the other hand, Julia was happy and if she was enjoying
herself, then he was as well.
 
In the
end, it really was that simple.

"I would have suggested this
before had I known you would enjoy it so," he finally replied feeling more
than a little off balance.
 
This new
Julia both surprised him and delighted him at the same time.
 
She was more like the girl he had once
known, and at the same time, an altogether different, and potentially
dangerous, creature.
 
"All I want
is for you to be happy, Jules.
 
That's
all I've ever wanted."

Nodding, she gazed at the sights as
they passed, not shying away.
 
The
difference was truly remarkable.
 
"I know.
 
Thank you.
 
You're a good friend to me, my lord.
 
Better than I deserve, really.
 
It cannot be easy being seen with me."

Ah, there was a hint of the shy,
retiring maiden he'd seen the ballrooms of London all season.
 
She hadn't disappeared, after all.
 
Merely hidden her insecurities a bit
better.
 
"I don't give a damn what
anyone thinks," he growled, his temper showing a bit, though he pushed it
aside.
 
His father would have showed his
anger.
 
Benjamin would not.
 
"You know that.
 
I never have."

"Still, it cannot be easy.
 
But I do thank you.
 
I'm not sure why you agreed to Nicholas's
outrageous plan, but I'm thankful you did.
 
I want a few happy memories to take home with me once this has all
ended."
 
She gave his arm a quick
pat, careful not to touch him for too long, lest it seem improper.
 
"Life at Seldon Park will seem dull in
comparison to London, but I cannot regret my time here."
 

Benjamin's heart, the one few
people thought he possessed, warmed a bit at her words.
 
He was happy she was enjoying herself so
thoroughly.
 
He was also extremely glad
that she had no idea that escorting her through her last few weeks of the
season had been entirely his idea.
 
It
had come to him as he'd watched her depart the ball with her companion as if by
divine inspiration.
 
He'd been so
excited that he'd sought out Nicholas immediately to ask his approval.

Julia's brother had been hesitant
at first, of course.
 
After all,
Benjamin wasn't truly related to Julia.
 
However, Nicholas had appeared to give the proposal some thought and,
after an hour or so had returned to find Benjamin in the ball's card room,
ready to give his approval.
 
For some
reason, Benjamin's pulse had quickened at the idea of bestowing such a gift on
the girl he'd known since childhood.

He'd understood the potential problems,
of course.
 
He was nothing if not
logical, something that was often mistaken for ruthlessness.
 
Even though Julia was a long-standing
friend, her presence at his side would be certain to spur talk, but Nicholas
was certain his sister could endure it with her usual grace and dignity.
 
It would also help deter the many
matchmaking mamas and their equally as grasping daughters.
 
There was that benefit, at least, for Benjamin,
even if not for Julia.
 
They would
gossip and speculate, certainly, but, given that Julia now had the protection
of Lady Berkshire - and he did not want to know how Nicholas had managed that
feat - no one would give her the cut direct.
 
Not like they had done so many times before.

Benjamin knew he owed her that
much, if not more.
 
He owed her so much,
so many things.
 
He would spend a
lifetime repaying his debt to her, even if she didn't know it.
 
This gesture was simply another small way of
doing so.

"I am glad of that," he
said as another carriage passed them, the occupants extremely interested in
Benjamin and Julia, at least if the way they craned their necks was any
indication.
 
"This time was meant
for you to enjoy yourself, Jules, not be in misery."

"I was miserable," she
confessed softly, so softly that he almost did hear her.
 
"But then last night, even before
Nicholas came to me with this proposal, I decided that I could not allow those
awful chits to win.
 
They may not care
for me, nor I for them, but that does not matter.
 
If I am miserable, then they have exactly what they want.
 
They win.
 
I will not allow it."

"That's my girl," he
chuckled, and then immediately wished he could take the words back.
 
She was not his girl, at least not really,
and he didn't want her to fill her head with fanciful ideas about the two of
them.
 
However, she was still looking
about in wonder, and if she'd picked up on his words, she'd not reacted to
them.
 
That was a relief.
 
"Do you wish to continue?"

Nodding, she secured her hat more
firmly on her head and gave him a winsome smile.
 
"Another turn, if you please.
 
Then we can go back."
 
Her gloved hand stroked her face absently.
 
"My scars will discolor if I am not careful, just as they do
at home."