Authors: Alex Douglas
Tags: #dragon, #fantasy romance, #mm, #gay romance, #glbt romance, #pilgrimage, #gods of love
When the carved blade shone with poison, the
monk left the statue turned pain-side out, and his eyes smiled at
us once again. “It is a wonderful day. Only this very morning, a
most-beloved servant of our order has gone to meet our Lady. May
Tivi’s dagger wound cleanly, friends.”
Perhaps he expected a response, but we just
stared up at the sorrowful eyes of the god and then back at his
own. This monk seemed inordinately happy about his beloved
companion meeting this poisoned dagger, and I let out a breath and
recalled the banter of the dwarven traders we’d met during our last
evening of freedom at the Duck and Swan, all recently returned from
the mountain kingdom. Bulging coin purses jangled at their belts,
yet bizarrely I had found myself adding the cost of their ales to
my tab once more.
Methari? They’re all madder than a sack of
scorpions. They’d fling themselves on a dagger as soon as take a
shit.
Hah! With the cursed prickles of those
arse-wipe leaves that grow up there, the feeling would be the
same!
Under Brin’s dark-browed frown, we followed
the monk up the path, puffing and blowing loudly when scarcely a
breath seemed to come from him; even our donkey was quieter than we
were, clopping along placidly with the mysterious sealed box Brin
had lashed to its back hidden underneath the rolls of fine Lis silk
that we had brought on the pretense of trade. The trees were thick
with needle-thin leaves and smelt of rain, even though the rock
underfoot was dry enough. Just as I thought my lungs were about to
leap out of my chest through my exertions, the trees began to thin
and our small party ascended into the fog. The steps widened and
ended in a flattened clearing. Before us lay the first Temple of
Matativi I had ever seen. Kel rubbed his hands together in academic
glee and began to point out the architectural features
rapturously.
The Temple was a plain, L-shaped structure
with a sloping roof tiled with slate. To the left were the stables,
and to the right there was a grove of ancient-looking trees with
gnarly branches bearing a pale yellow fruit, with some stretches of
tilled land around upon which various crops were growing.
Underneath the tree, red hens scratched in the dirt and a few goats
submitted to the hands of silver-swathed monks squeezing out the
day’s milk. Beyond the main building, thin columns of smoke curled
from smaller buildings nestling among trees where I surmised the
monks made their beds.
When I’d caught my breath, I addressed the
monk. “How many live here?”
“
Only fifty-two. We are but a small
part of the Mother’s family.”
Lara looked interested. “You have women in
your order?”
He faced us with amusement in his dark eyes.
“Oh indeed, it must seem strange to you. I’ve heard that Lis does
not tolerate the presence of women in its halls of worship. It is,
perhaps, one of the reasons that Lis has been riven with unrest for
so long, while Methar enjoys unity. A man’s heart is no better
guarded against Tivi’s dagger than a woman’s. We have all known its
poison, and its peace.”
Brin’s frown deepened. “History’s telling of
the Splinterings do little for your talk of unity, monk.”
The monk bowed slightly and spoke in a
gentle voice. “We are all Tivi’s warriors,
tiyal
, though some have strayed far from their
Mother, as children who know no better are wont to do. You would do
well to remember that as you travel toward the heart of our land.
As you move further from your land, you will find that there are
many who are intolerant of apostates, for that’s likely how you’ll
be looked upon.”
It made my heart soar for a second to see a
flash of incredulous rage color Brin’s cheeks, but he held his
tongue. My brother was devout, but he was not stupid. The monk
could not have known the clout his use of the generic term carried,
let alone understood what it meant to Brin. Nor, I suspected, would
he have cared a jot about what the Protectors got up to. The chaos
that was Lis may as well have lain a thousand-mile away from this
peaceful grove.
“
Are you to be our guide?” Lana
scuffed her boots against the ground, glancing around with idle
curiosity.
“
Not I.” The monk turned. “If you’ll
follow me, Mother Kiti would talk with you before you take our
young charge.”
He led us toward the main building and in
through a solid side door. The interior was dark and the walls
scorched with the memory of candles. Incense hung heavy in the air,
and to the right I caught a glimpse of silver-robed figures in a
semi-circle, kneeling on straw mats and chanting at the feet of
Matativi. The same blind eyes looked through me, identical to those
of the statue at the foot of the hill.
The door at the end of the walkway had a sun
carved into the wood, and when we stepped into the small room, it
was light and airy. A breeze entered through an open window,
rustling the scrolls on the desk, behind which sat a slight figure
wrapped in the same silver robe as all the others, slightly hunched
with hands veined with age. Mother Kiti stood up, ice-blue eyes
crinkling at the corners. Her face was covered only loosely, and I
noticed that her ears were pierced numerous times, gleaming with
studs and hoops with the heavier rings weighing down her fleshy
lobes.
“
You must be Brindar Melchion of Lis.”
She bowed slightly and gestured at some cushions on the floor.
“Come and sit. Brother Vesti will bring wine. You must be
thirsty.”
Wine! I was cheered instantly. It had been
almost a week since I had last tasted the grape and I had built up
a considerable thirst. The thought of my brother’s discomfort when
faced with an obligation to imbibe made the imagined taste of it
all the sweeter.
“
Indeed, I am Brindar; this is my
younger brother Nedim, and the youth is Kelthras Amillian, our
cousin and a scholar at the Theological University of Azmara. Lana
Destar is a…
companion
of
Nedim’s, and will accompany us also.”
“
Mesthe
Matas
,” Lana said, inclining her head
slightly.
“
Matassa
Mestheen
.” The old woman’s tone warmed, and she
gestured again to the floor. We sat down, cross-legged, and watched
the Mother kneel and tuck her feet under her robes like a young
girl. She was flexible for someone of such advanced years, not
plagued by swell-knuckle as my own mother had been. Silence spun
out between us as we waited for her to speak, but it was not until
she had a glass tumbler of wine in her hand that she said another
word. After raising the drink to the sky, she cupped it in her
hands and sipped. “Mata’s love be upon you,
tiyallan
.”
The wine was delicious. Red and fruity with
a hint of summer apples and a strong kick of alcohol. I savored
every sip; Brin had forbidden me to drink on the pilgrimage so I
emitted sighs of enjoyment which both pleased the Mother and
irritated my brother. It was a wonderful moment.
“
Your guide has seen no more than
nineteen winters,” Mother Kiti said, when her glass was empty. “Do
not be dismayed by the appearance of such youth. It is rare for one
so young to wish for a monastic life, and it is not at all
desirable. This is the main reason why I encourage my grandchild to
venture out of this sanctuary to embrace the world and all the joys
therein. But fear not, Kari is a warrior of Tivi as we all are, and
will be a competent guide to lead you to your
destination.”
Brin frowned again. “I had hoped we would
have a guide who had at least left the Temple.”
The old woman laughed. “You misunderstand
me, child. As all who wear the silver must do, Kari accompanied me
on the same pilgrimage not two years ago. If you are – as you said
in your letter of introduction – determined to take the shorter
path, you will need guidance through the caverns of Khar Tam. And
besides, this can be a dangerous land for explorers to blunder
through blindly.”
“
Is Kari really your grandchild?” Lara
said. “But I thought monks weren’t allowed to…”
“
Love? Have sex? Have children?” The
old woman finished her sentence with a naughty gleam in her eye,
fingering the hoops in her ears with a wistful smile. I smothered a
grin as Brin almost spat out his wine at such a casual mention of
the act. “Perhaps not in Lis. But life is different here, child.
These things are as natural as breathing the air around us. I knew
numerous wonderful men in the years before I assumed the silver
mantle. Kari is but one of my grandchildren. When my youngest
daughter came to take her own vows she was with child, although she
did not know it at the time. Kari has grown up in the Temple. We’ve
all agreed that it is time for —”
Just then, there was a knock on the door.
Another monk. I took the opportunity to pour myself another glass
of wine as the newcomer – presumably this guide who had left the
monastery but once – entered soundlessly and knelt beside the
Mother. She was tall and slender, with the same ice-blue eyes as
her grandmother and graceful, gloved hands which she folded on her
knee.
I looked into those eyes and just for a
second, I felt something odd pull at my heart. They were bright
with intelligence, and fixed on my face. My mouth edged itself into
some sort of smile; I couldn’t help myself under the warmth of that
gaze. I sipped the wine again and grinned like a fool, much to
Lara’s obvious amusement.
Kari eased her gloves off and I was
surprised to see calluses on her palms, cuts on the long, slim
fingers, and ground-in dirt around cracked nails. Her eyes smiled
at me and I was off on the clouds again. But when she spoke, I came
back down to earth with a resounding thump. Kari’s voice was
slightly husky, as if it had not been used for some time.
Slightly husky, deep, and definitely
male.
“
I look forward to accompanying you on
your pilgrimage, although I must confess I go under
duress.”
The Mother shifted and her eyes narrowed
slightly; she looked at Kari with a sigh that told of past quarrels
not necessarily resolved. She poured another glass of wine for
Kari, and he unwrapped the silver slightly, revealing a strong,
stubbled chin and a sensuous, smiling mouth. Together they held
their glasses to the sky, before taking a simultaneous sip. Lara
and I followed suit enthusiastically; I suspected she was missing
the drink as much as I was. Kel, unused to alcohol, was already
glassy-eyed. As for my brother, they might as well have served him
a glass of their famed poison, so dark and put-upon was his
expression.
“
By the Gods, you’re a man!” Brin
said, raising an eyebrow.
Kari laughed, a joyous sound as warming to
the heart as the wine. “Why would you think otherwise? For our
bath, we will use the hot spring at the back of the living quarters
to ease your bodies before I show you to your room. The nearest
town on our path is a twelve-mile away, and we must get there
before the fall of darkness.”
“
Why is that?” Brin asked, getting to
his feet. My knees groaned as I followed suit.
Kari and the Mother glanced at each other.
“Things more fearsome than your dreams lurk in the darkness,
Brindar of Lis.”
“
I am afraid of no
beast
.”
Again, a brief look passed between them
before Kari turned to us and smiled. “Come. You must be tired. I
will bathe with you, as custom requires.”
Brin looked so uncomfortable that I almost
hugged myself with joy. “I would prefer to bathe alone.”
Kari seemed undeterred. “I will bathe with
you and then we will rest.”
The Mother put her hand on Brin’s arm.
“
Tiyal
, a bonded group bathes
naked and equal, without symbol or sword, without pride or shame.”
Her eyes smiled again. “It is the way of things.”
“
Naked
?” Brin
looked as if he was about to explode.
“
You don’t presume to bathe in full
mail and plate, my son? You will surely rust.”
I smothered my mirth, recalling that under
the wretched Rite Brin had invoked, he could punish any small
rebellion of mine in any way he chose.
Lana, however, was chuckling openly. “Oh,
come now, Brindar, this will be most illuminating. I’ve always
wondered what treasures the Protectors keep hidden under all that
metal. Such rumors abound about hidden weaponry and the like; I am
most curious!”
“
Hold your tongue, woman!”
Poor Brin. I sighed with pleasure at his
writhing discomfort. This pilgrimage was turning out to be more fun
than I had ever dreamed, and, no doubt, a lot less fun – if that
was indeed what he had anticipated – than my brother ever could
have believed. Forced to drink alcohol and faced with the prospect
of stripping naked in front of a female and a stranger, Brin must
have thought he had stepped through the Burning Portal and into the
Plane of Demons itself.
“
Come,” Kari said. We followed him
back out into the clearing and along a well-trodden path behind the
main building to the living quarters, Nearby, silver-clad monks
were sitting around a newly-lit fire, blowing on the wood and
warming their hands against the burgeoning flames. The crackle of
the wood and the aroma of the smoke was a homely smell, and I
watched Kari bow as we passed them. He was as tall as Brin and
slender in his robes, but the way he carried himself spoke of grace
and power. I was intrigued to find out what lay beneath those robes
even though he was a man; the hidden, in my experience, was always
something worth laying eyes upon.