Three Little Words (11 page)

            Marti pouted and snuck another glance up at me. I frowned at her, not liking the way those wide eyes of Adele’s were watching the situation.

            “No,” the smaller girl said finally, huffing a bit to show that she didn’t appreciate the task. Before she walked away, she placed one hand invitingly on my arm and looked up at me while batting her eyelashes.

            The effect was lost on me, because her nails were long, sharp and dark purple. I would never let anything like that anywhere near my cock. I valued it far too much.

            “I’m looking forward to your show here tomorrow night.” Marti had adopted that breathy, come hither tone that so many girls thought was sexy. I thought it made her sound like a cartoon animal, but I didn’t like being rude just because someone was a bit more zealous of a fan than was comfortable.

            “Let me know if there’s anything special that you’ll... need.” Again she fluttered her lashes, and I wondered how she managed to even open her lids, with all the black gunk she’d caked on her eyelashes. I watched as she walked away, only to make sure she was actually gone.

            When I turned back to Adele, she too was looking towards where Marti had disappeared. Her face was painted with both amusement and distaste.

            “Does that happen a lot?” She asked.

            I hesitated; I wanted to be honest, but I didn’t want to turn her off.

            “Uh... it’s not the first time.” And wouldn’t be the last, not so long as I was a musician. I’d learned long ago that while I could enjoy the benefits, there was nothing about me specifically that appealed to hard core groupie girls.

            They’d be equally enticed by anyone who was on that stage in my spot. Right now, it just happened to be me.

            “So you’re kind of a big deal, huh?” Adele’s lips curled up in a teasing smirk, and I gave her one right back. I liked the way she was warming up to me.

            Somehow, I was pretty sure that this was one girl who couldn’t have cared less what I did for a living.

            “Will saying yes make you look at me like this?” Grinning, I mimicked Marti, batting my eyelashes and pursing my lips. Adele laughed... she didn’t laugh often, but when she did, it was impossible not to look at her.

            “Three Little Words has had this show booked here for over a month.” She said when she’d stopped laughing, pinning me with those intense eyes. I nodded at the unspoken question.

            She shook her head and muttered to herself. She spoke quietly, but I caught the words “fucking fate”.

            “Actually, as you just said, we’re called Three Little Words. But I’ll keep Fucking Fate in mind, just in case.”

            She was so cute when she rolled her eyes, I could no longer resist the urge—I had to touch her.

            Though what I
really
wanted was to strip her naked and kiss and taste every inch of her, I settled for reaching out and cupping her cheek in my hand.

            I’d have her naked soon enough.

            It was a chaste touch, but she trembled beneath my fingers. Whatever this was between us, she felt it too.

            “So. Will my phone be coming to our show tomorrow night?” I tried to keep my voice light, but I felt anything but.

            I wanted her there. Wanted to sing, just for her.

            Her lips curled up in a smile, even as her lips parted when I brushed my thumb along her cheekbone.

            “Yes. Your phone will be there.” A shadow danced through her eyes. “Will Mal be there?”

            “He said he would be.” I traced down her cheek, then over her lips. The heat of her breath on my fingers made my mind stray to very dark, very dirty places.

            “You two living together makes this... all of this... very awkward.”

            I understood what she was saying. She wasn’t choosing yet. I didn’t want her to.

            “It’s only awkward if we make it awkward.” My fingers stroked down her neck, coming to rest on the pulse point beneath the sleek line of her jaw. This was the realization that I’d come to in the middle of the night.

            The thought of Adele being with most other men made me want to chain her to my bed and keep her there until she came to her senses. But when I thought about her with Mal...

            Maybe it was because she’d been his first, but I found that I didn’t mind, which was a shocking realization for me, given how violently I reacted to the idea of Adele with anyone else.

            “What are you saying?”

            “I’m saying that I’m not ever going to make you choose.” Which didn’t stop me from wondering if she
would
choose, even if I didn’t ask her to, but that was getting far ahead of myself.

            Well, I’d give her something to keep me in mind if she saw Mal again before she saw me.

            “Make sure my phone comes to the show tomorrow night.” Bending, I brushed the lightest, merest whisper of a kiss over her lips. It took everything I had not to bury my hands in her hair and dive in to the sweetness that she offered, because that slight press of our lips was the most electric fucking touch I’d ever expected.

            Over the years I’d learned the value of delayed gratification. The more work that went into something, the better the reward at the end. So even though I want to devour her whole, I cast her a cocky smile and walked away.

            If a chaste little kiss was that mind blowing, what would it feel like when we were naked together, when I was moving inside of her?

            I couldn’t wait to find out.

            MAL

            I smelled Adele’s perfume the second that Dorian walked through the door. The scent of ripe strawberries, ready to be tasted, hung on the air around my roommate as he toed off his Converse and nodded in my direction.

            I opened my mouth to ask if he’d just seen her; then forced myself to close it again.

            I had no right to her, none at all. But that kiss last night had told me that the connection between us was still there—was still potent and intoxicating.

            I wanted to do right by Adele this time. But I also didn’t want to let her go.

            “It’s fucking hot in here.” Dorian cast over his shoulder at me as he turned to hang his leather jacket on the hook screwed into the wall. In defense against the autumn chill outside, the heaters in the ancient building had whirred to life. But they’d come on a little strong, and Dorian was right—it was fucking hot. So hot I’d stripped down to my boxers and a T-shirt and was still a bit sweaty.

            No doubt it was the heat that was intensifying that scent of ripe fruit, making it smell like Adele had been wrapped right against Dorian, skin rubbing on skin.

            I wasn’t jealous... not exactly. But I wasn’t really sure how I felt, other than that I wanted to see her again. Wanted to know what had changed her, and how I could fix it.

            “Haven’t you taken a look at the heater?” Dorian cast an exasperated look my way, swiping his arm over his forehead. As he stalked to the old fashioned register that stood against the living room wall, he pulled his T-shirt up and over his head, tossing it aside.

            How the hell was the dude so built when all he did was prance around on a stage with a guitar a couple nights a week? The dampness on his skin from the heat of the room showcased a hard back, shoulder blades emphasized by tattoos that looked like wings, a narrow waist, and lean hips.

            I was pretty confident in my own body—I’d filled out some in recent years. But Dorian—I’d never looked at a dude that way, but I could why chicks were always so into him. His body, the way he walked, it all just screamed sex.

            The realization made my cheeks flush. Hastily I looked back down at the book in my lap. What was I doing, looking at Dorian and thinking about all the things that a woman might find sexy about him?

            “You’re from Australia. It’s hot there. So shouldn’t this be, like, the mother ship calling?” To break the tension I stood, made my way to the tiny fridge. Dorian had gotten a wrench from somewhere and was doing something with the radiator. I found I wanted to watch him do it, and that made me more than a bit uncomfortable.

            It was Adele, thoughts of sex with Adele. Of the way Adele might be thinking of sex with Dorian.

            It was all jumbled together in my head. That was all.

            It was really hot in here.

            “Want a beer?” I grabbed two cans from the fridge. They immediately clouded over with condensation, the heat of the room sapping their chill.

            “Thanks, mate.” With one last turn of something on the radiator, Dorian threw the wrench to the floor, then cracked open his beer. The hissing of pressure leaving the can was swallowed in the gurgle of the radiator as the flow of heated air eased.

            “Dude, you rock.” The room seemed instantly cooler, and I collapsed back onto the couch, gesturing to Dorian with my beer.

            “Cheers.” He raised his back, turning on the TV before settling on the other end of the couch.

            I was uncomfortably aware of the fact that we were both wearing less clothing than usual, and I had no idea why that even registered with me. The silence stretched between us, heavy with awkwardness.

            “This isn’t an ideal situation.” When I finally managed to speak, I could hear the tightness in my voice. “This thing with Adele.”

            Draining his beer, then tossing the can across the room to the area we’d roughly dedicated for recycling and trash, Dorian leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. Though he was speaking to me, he looked straight ahead, and I wondered if he was feeling uncomfortable, too.

            “Look, mate, I’ll tell you the same thing I just told Adele. Something I figured out last night.”

            A stab of something that was potent but that I couldn’t quite label as jealously worked through my gut. I nodded for him to continue, even though he wasn’t looking at me and couldn’t have seen.

            “I’m into her, yeah. Who wouldn’t be? And there’s something still there between you two.” At this he turned his head to look at me, and I met his gaze steadily.

            I might not have any claim on her, but I wasn’t about to shove her into Dorian’s arms.

            “I don’t like the thought of her with anyone else, but I don’t mind the notion of the two of you. So, we’ll both spend time together with her. And there will be no hard feelings unless one of us makes it that way.”

            Frowning a bit, I tried to absorb what he’d just said. It seemed like such a strange suggestion from a man who was possessive, cocky and domineering. I was sure that I’d missed something.

            “Like, we each date her, or we date her together?” A jolt went through me as I said the words.

            I’d rather date her exclusively. But if it meant that I could have at least part of Adele...

            I realized that I might be willing to bend some of my previously held notions. And that shocked me to the core in more ways than one.

            Looking over at my roommate, I found that he’d fixed me with an inscrutable stare. My pulse picked up its pace as I tried to figure out what the hell was going on.

            “Each of us date her separately, dumbass,” he finally said, standing and heading to the fridge.

            Once there, he looked back over his shoulder. “Unless you’re trying to tell me something.”

            He was having a go at me, and I knew it, but at the same time I didn’t hear any judgment in his tone.

            What the fuck was wrong with my brain?

            “Not all of us are into rock star orgies, you pervert.” Breaking the tension, I settled back onto the couch with my text, effectively ending the conversation. Or so I thought.

            On his way out of the room, Dorian passed behind the couch. Laying his hand on my shoulder, he leaned in to speak directly into my ear. My body tensed; though his proximity to me wasn’t uncomfortable, I didn’t know what to do.

            “There’s a pervert in all of us, mate. Some just hide it better than others.” Then he was off to his room, and I was left alone to ponder that little gem.

            When derby practice wrapped up that evening I was disappointed to not find Dorian in the stands, watching me with that wicked grin of his. I couldn’t deny how good the man made me feel—the way I felt normal with him, not like the girl whose spirit had been fractured into a million pieces.

            The way I felt like I could lean on him, like he would be strong enough for both of us.

            But there was someone watching, and as I skated off to the side to remove my gear, I wasn’t overly surprised to find that it was Mal. Dressed in tidy jeans and a thick blue sweater, those wire rimmed glasses of his outlining the incredible blue of his eyes, he looked good enough to eat.

            And two minutes earlier I’d been thinking about Dorian. I might have felt like a skank, except that for me, wanting two different men was serious progress.

            Could it be that there was hope for me after all? That I could again learn how to touch a man, to exorcise the nightmares and replace them with pleasure?

            I cocked an eyebrow at him, watched him make his way towards me as I pulled apart the Velcro that held my kneepads in place.

            “Touch Me At Your Peril?” Skirting behind me, he traced his fingers over where my derby name was embroidered onto the back of my T-shirt. Even through the thin cotton, the skin beneath his fingers warmed, the touch resonating through my torso, pulling my nipples in tight.

            “That’s right.” I cast a look back over my shoulder. My derby name had more significance than he would ever know, ‘cause I sure wasn’t going to tell him what had happened the night I’d gone looking for him. I knew Mal, and knew he would carry the guilt with him for the rest of his life, when it wasn’t his fault. “And I might add that you’re touching me now.”