Authors: Jennifer Quintenz
“I’ll see you in a couple of hours,” Matt said quietly.
“Watch your back,” Gretchen said. “I’m getting kind of fond of it. And of the rest of you, too.”
“You’re going to make me blush,” Matt laughed softly. I heard them share another quick kiss, and then Matt was out the door and gone.
“I need a minute, everyone,” Hale said. Dad and I followed Gretchen into the living room. “Everyone, Lucas.” Lucas walked into the room and perched on the arm of the couch by Gretchen. Hale spoke again. “The war is here,” he said. “And humanity needs us to bring our best to the fight.” Hale picked up a gleaming set of daggers in an oiled sheath. “Braedyn. We haven’t gotten to these yet, but the daggers are more than weapons of the Guard. They’re also a symbol. Whether or not you’re ready, training is over. Welcome to the Guard.”
Hale set the daggers into my hands. They felt heavier than I’d remembered. I caught Dad’s eye. He looked torn between worry and pride. Lucas’ jaw tightened, he was glaring at the floor. He didn’t see Hale pick up another set of daggers in a sheath.
“Lucas,” Hale continued. “You’ve been telling me you’re ready for these for over a year. Now you get to prove it.” He tossed the daggers to Lucas, who caught the sheath in one fist.
“Hale,” Gretchen said, standing. Her voice was tight with concern.
“We need every soldier we have.” Hale silenced Gretchen’s fresh protest with a look, and turned back to Lucas. “And Murphy.” Hale thrust his hands out to Thane, who still held the sword. Thane transferred it without complaint. Hale turned and presented the sword to Murphy. “Semangelof’s sword. This should go to you.” Dad accepted the sword, reverently.
Hale glanced at his watch. “We’ll know more when Marx’s team returns. At that point, we’ll start planning our attack. Our best option is attacking at dawn, when she’s weakest. In the meantime, try to get some sleep.” It was a dismissal.
Everyone stood. Gretchen walked to Hale, pulling him aside to talk. I approached Lucas, hoping for a moment to explain. He was still staring at the daggers in his hands.
“Lucas,” I said.
He looked up at me, all warmth evaporating from his face. “There’s nothing I want to hear from you.”
“Please. Let me explain.”
He looked away from me, letting his hair fall over his eyes. “What you did. Trespassing on my dreams. That was a violation.” He met my eyes, and I read in them the pain of betrayal. “I don’t care why you did it. Those were my intimate thoughts. You had no right.” Lucas shouldered past me, and headed straight up the stairs.
I turned to follow him, mortified. “Lucas.”
Gretchen stepped in my path. “You’re kidding, right?” She frowned and lowered her voice. “The Guard needs you. We both get it. But Lucas doesn’t want to see you more than he has to. So do us both a favor and go home.”
I looked up the stairs, over her shoulder. Lucas reached his doorway, and disappeared into the darkness of his room.
Dad approached and stood by my side. Gretchen’s gaze shifted to him. “You protect her, but I have to protect him.” He stared her down with a level gaze. Gretchen looked away first, and retreated up the stairs.
When she was out of earshot, Dad turned to me. “You scared the life out of me. If you ever think you need to run, you run
with me.
Do you understand?” He stared into my eyes for another moment, and then pulled me into a rough bear hug.
“I tried to call,” I said, tears springing to my eyes.
“That reminds me.” He pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to me. “You lost something.” My cell phone, adorned with a few new scratches it hadn’t had this morning. I read the screen. Twenty-seven missed calls. Dad’s eyes were a window into whatever personal hell he’d battled for the last few hours.
“I couldn’t reach you,” I said, the words pouring out in a rush. “And then Hale and Gretchen showed up at Royal’s with the police, and I thought... I thought they had decided I was the enemy.”
Dad flinched. “This is my fault.” As I listened, Dad explained what had happened after I’d left the hospital. They’d called Hale, who ordered an emergency meeting. On their way to meet him, Gretchen spotted a Thrall. She left to tail the Thrall while Dad and Thane went on to explain my situation to Hale. As they had finished telling Hale about Parker, and what I had done to him, Gretchen called. She’d found a few Thrall milling around the warehouse district. It was suspicious enough that everyone joined her to scout the area. They spent the morning searching until they found the warehouse.
While everyone was combing through the warehouse district, Marx’s unit had arrived, looking for us. They searched Hale’s house first, and then ours. When Dina looked in my room, she saw the residual traces from the night I’d planted that horrible seed in Parker’s mind. She flipped out. They had been the ones who’d tossed my room, deeply paranoid that I’d managed to infiltrate Hale’s unit. They got a call from Gretchen about the warehouse, but didn’t let on what they’d found in my room. They left to join the search in the warehouse district, and missed Lucas’ and my return home. Around three, Gretchen and Hale had headed home. Hale wanted to speak with me, to hear my side of the story. He went to our house while Gretchen went looking for Lucas. She found us together.
“She was ready to kill me,” I whispered.
Dad’s eyes tightened with concern. “She panicked. I’m not saying it was warranted, but with her history... Remember what she’s been through. When you ran away, Gretchen called Thane. He drove me back, refusing to answer any of my questions. I thought... I thought something had happened to you.” Dad shook his head. “As soon as people calmed down enough to get a good look at Lucas, they realized he hadn’t been damaged. Normal pupil reaction, alert, responsive.” Dad looked at me, as if he were afraid to ask. “You kissed him?”
I squared my shoulders. “Technically, he kissed me.” I didn’t want to apologize. I shouldn’t have to. If I were a normal girl, getting caught kissing Lucas would have been, at most, embarrassing. “But yeah. I kissed him back. I didn’t hurt him. I won’t let myself hurt him.”
Again,
I added silently. Dad didn’t look happy. “I didn’t hurt him,” I repeated, but it sounded like a question.
“No, you didn’t. Once everyone had recovered from the panic, Hale realized we had to find you before you ran off. He called a connection in the police department and asked them to put a trace on your cell phone.” Dad smiled wryly. “Which was only useful until Royal tipped you off.”
“Royal.” My voice caught in my throat. “Dad... I told him.”
Dad grew still, a pensive frown drawing down the corners of his mouth. “I suppose you thought you had no other allies. But Braedyn, no one else can know. The more people who do know, the more danger you will be in.”
Immediately, I thought of Amber. I still didn’t know what she’d overheard at the hospital. But that was a problem for another day.
Dad searched my face again, as if looking for some proof that I was going to be okay. “What you must have been going through,” he said. “If I’d known where you were... nothing could have kept me away.”
“I know.”
A soft pride glowed in his eyes. “But you found their hunting ground. As soon as we got your message, Marx sent two teams out to investigate. Upon reflection, I don’t think he trusted our crew to do the job.”
“I remember meeting one of his teams,” I said, grim.
“Yeah.” A muscle along his jaw jumped, betraying his anger. “If you hadn’t called Lucas, the other team would never have found the rave. There were at least two Lilitu hunting the crowd. We didn’t catch either of them, but we ended the party.”
“Lucas?” I felt a sudden lift. He’d hung up on me, but he’d trusted me enough to pass along my warning. I replayed Sansenoy’s words in my mind. Not a promise, not a deal... but hope. Hope that some day I might be able to be with Lucas, free from the fear of hurting him.
Dad didn’t seem to notice the look I shot up the stairs toward Lucas’ room. “Tell me about Ais. You said you saw her?”
I took a shuddering breath and told Dad everything, from when I decided to follow the Lilitu, all the way through when I saw Ais for the first time and felt the icy brush of her fingertip.
“She touched you?” He looked alert.
“Her hand was cold,” I said. “Freezing cold.”
“Perhaps it was a good thing you thought the Guard was hunting you,” Dad murmured. “If Ais is able to read the conscious mind, it might be through that touch.”
A sheen of cold sweat prickled across my back as I remembered our conversation.
Dad was impatient for the rest of the story. “Go on. What happened after Ais left?” I continued, and when I got to the part about the Thrall that Karayan had sent after me, Dad unwittingly dug his fingers into my arm. His face twisted into a mask of anguish that only lessened when I assured him I’d escaped unscathed. His eyes changed when I told him about the first time I’d felt my wings.
“Yes,” he said, his eyes sharpening. “Show me again.”
I concentrated, and as I thought about them, I could feel them, like a shiver in the air behind me. I willed them to enfold me, and they responded. I heard Dad exhale sharply. I lost my concentration and they retracted, fading to the back of my consciousness.
Dad looked unsettled, but he smiled. “That’s amazing.”
I turned and happened to catch Thane and Hale staring at me, eyes alert. I saw Hale’s hand gripping the hilts of the daggers he carried at his side. When he realized I was looking at him, his eyes dropped to his hand. He jerked his fingers away from the daggers as though the hilts had burned him. He looked up and gave me a sheepish smile, as if to say,
Old habits die hard.
Thane gave me a solemn, considered look. He didn’t smile, but his customary scowl hadn’t returned. He looked... sad.
Dad squeezed my shoulder. “We should get home and get some sleep,” he said. “Hale. Thane. Call us when you know anything.”
Hale nodded, and he and Thane went back to work pulling bedrolls out of storage and setting them up on the living room floor. I knew Marx and his team would need to crash for a few hours when they returned. How many hours did we have left until dawn? I felt sure that however many there were, we could have used a lot more.
Dad and I went home. I noticed the Firebird, parked out front. Someone had driven it back. As we walked into the foyer of our house, Dad put a hand on my shoulder.
“How do you feel about the downstairs guest room?”
Right. My room currently looked like the target of some tornado that had a personal vendetta against teenage girls. The guest room was cramped and cold, but at least there was a mattress on the bed. I forced a smile. “It’s better than the alternative.”
Dad helped me change the sheets to a fresh set. While we worked, I caught sight of my reflection in the small mirror over the hutch. An angry red mark had darkened my cheek. I lifted my hand to touch the tender spot and winced. Dad noticed my reaction and straightened.
I didn’t think I could take another round of ‘Let’s Make Sure Braedyn’s All Right.’ I cleared my throat quickly. “What was up with Thane?”
Dad bent to straighten the sheets, aware that I was changing the subject but willing to let me do so. “Why, did he seem stranger than normal?”
“He seemed sad.” I stuffed the last pillow into its case and dropped it on the bed.
Dad stood straighter, considering. “Despite what he says, I think he did love Karayan like a daughter,” he said finally. “When he arrived here, I was convinced he’d driven those feelings out of himself. But now, I’m not so sure. Being around us seems to be getting harder and harder for him.”
“You think he still loves her?” And as I said this, I saw Thane’s face again, and his deep sadness as he’d watched me reappear from under the cloaking effects of my wings. Thinking about what he’d lost, maybe? Or was he finally acknowledging to himself that if I had committed to helping humankind, Karayan could have made that choice at one time as well?
“I think some part of him knows he drove her away. For as long as he lives, he’ll know he destroyed his relationship with the only daughter he’ll ever have.”
Dad’s words were buzzing in my head long after he’d kissed me on the forehead and said good night. I found I couldn’t sleep. It was cold downstairs. A thermostat controlled the heater; it was programmed to let the house cool down at night. Before bed, I’d rooted through the pile of clothes on my bedroom floor and found my flannel pajamas. Since it was already bitterly cold, I took my fluffy pink bathrobe out of the upstairs bathroom for good measure and wore it until I climbed into bed. Three hours later I was still cold, and I still didn’t feel like sleeping.
I heard Marx’s team returning. My mind was plagued with curiosity about what they’d learned, and whether we had a shot at stopping Ais in time. I glanced at the clock. It was two twelve in the morning. We’d be up and preparing our attack in a little over two hours.
I got out of bed and pulled the robe back on, belting it over my pajamas. I walked over to the hutch and moved my jeans to one side. The daggers I’d left there earlier gleamed in the darkness. I pulled them out of their sheath. With my Lilitu sight, I could make out the play of colors across the metal. I twisted the hilt, and the two daggers sprang apart in my hands, each with one straight edge and one serpentine edge. I walked to one curtained window and pulled the drapes aside. In the moonlight, the colors of the blade, though muted, seemed strangely vibrant against the soft grays of rest of the world.