Though My Heart Is Torn: The Cadence of Grace, Book 2 (17 page)

A hand patted his shoulder.

The reverend looked down at him. “The Allans are here. So is your family. We are ready to proceed.”

Straightening, Gideon pressed his back against the hard pew. He glanced sideways but saw no one. Turning in his seat, he stared toward the back of the church. Henry Allan slipped his hat from his head. His wife, Mary, untied the laces of her bonnet, and when she caught Gideon’s gaze, she looked away. Libby, Cassie’s younger sister, stared at the floor, large ears poking through her hair.

Some celebration.

They were getting what they wanted from him. Soon he would owe them nothing but time. The rest of his life.

He glanced at the final person. The pale-faced girl stared back with eyes wider than he’d ever seen.
Cassie
. What? Was she nervous? She had no reason to be. It wasn’t like she was wearing white.

His family strode in, his ma’s face as grim as ever. She sat in a
nearby pew, and his brothers and sisters filed in beside her. His pa followed behind, hat in his hands. He gave Gideon a curt nod.

Gideon turned to Reverend Gardner, and his eyes locked with the old man’s. So this was it.

“Where’s Lonnie?” Gideon blurted, not caring if it were rude to speak of her in front of the Allans. He had to know she was safe.

“She’s in good hands.”

Jacob?
Gideon knew the answer. He was with his mother. He would grow to be a strong lad. Gideon searched the reverend’s pudgy face, though in his mind’s eye, he saw only the image of his lost son.
Jacob
. The joy of his life.

The words that fell from the reverend’s lips drew him back to the present. “Are you ready to proceed?”

Gideon stood. He would never be ready, but what did it matter?

“The Allans will serve as witnesses. Hopefully you have no objections to that?”

He shrugged. Henry snorted.

Gideon stared at the man. Henry Allan simply glared back.

A muscle flexed in Gideon’s jaw. If the man didn’t want to give up his daughter, then why was he? Henry could keep Cassie for all Gideon cared. Gideon loosened his tie, tugging it free. He tossed it on the pew beside him. Cassie’s eyes followed the movement. What did she care for? She’d seen him in his tie. They’d been here before.

She stepped forward at the reverend’s bidding, and Gideon’s feet turned to lead.

Reverend Gardner placed a hand on Cassie’s shoulder. “Stand here. And you, Gideon.” He pointed to the floor. “Stand here.”

Gideon did as he was told. His muddy boots shuffled forward until his toes nearly touched her black shoes. Freshly polished. He forced himself to lift his gaze. He ran fingers through his hair, beyond caring what he looked like.

Gideon fought the anger that rose in his chest. His actions had been such a mistake, and they would cost him the rest of his life.

“Please join hands.”

Cassie hesitated. Gideon had no desire to prolong the painful event. Grabbing her hand, he held it in his. Her fingers were cool, her skin soft. Memories flooded him, and he shook off the thoughts. He needed only Lonnie. He wanted no more of Cassie. The less they touched the better.

Reverend Gardner began. His words seemed to float toward the rafters, for Gideon heard none of them. When prompted, he spoke the vows he was required to say. In his mind, he saw the glimmer of Eli’s rifle and the hatred in the man’s eyes. Gideon was finally doing right by Cassie. Their hatred had no more fuel.

Cassie’s soft voice drew his attention. “I will,” she whispered.

“And will you, Gideon, take Cassie to be your lawful wife, love her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health”—he cleared his throat—“forsaking all others, keep only unto her so long as you both shall live?”

Silent seconds passed. The seconds grew into a lengthy span until Gideon finally iced his heart over, glanced past Cassie, and spoke into the empty deep.

“I will.”

Cassie felt the heat of Gideon’s words, but not in comfort. She looked up at him and saw the truth in his eyes—he did not love her. Worse. He despised her. He was simply doing his duty. Typical Gideon. She touched her boots together as demurely as possible and blinked up at him, glad she’d pinched her cheeks to the point of pain before arriving. She had her work cut out for her. But she was more than ready for the challenge.

The reverend cleared his throat and hesitated. The darkness beneath his eyes and the silver stubble on his round face hinted that this incident was taking its toll on him.

He looked from her to Gideon. “You may kiss … the bride.” The last words fell from his lips with sorrow and tumbled down.

Stones to her heart.

Cassie held her breath, but before another moment passed, Gideon released her hand and wiped his palm on his pants as if needing to be rid of her touch. She looked at her ma, who offered her a soft smile.

“So we’re finished here?” Henry asked.

The reverend nodded.

“I need some air,” Gideon murmured. “I’ll wait outside.”

He grabbed his jacket from the pew, ignoring the tie. Cassie
watched him leave. Every footfall stomped harder on her heart than on the floorboards below.

So this is what she had to look forward to. A husband who did not love her.

Why would he?
She was not Lonnie. She couldn’t begin to guess what was so great about the woman. Lonnie was so … plain. Cassie fiddled with her locket, running it up one side of its chain. She knew a thing or two about getting Gideon’s attention. If Lonnie Sawyer could do it, for heaven’s sake, she could too.

Though the sun still held its ground, spreading rays of light across the land, tiny droplets of rain began to fall. Lonnie looked up at the thickening clouds and realized the sun fought a battle it could not win.

“Take this,” Sarah called. She propped the door open with one hand and held a basket out with the other. “Just pulled this bread from the oven.” Suddenly alarmed, she looked around her. “Where’s Jacob?”

“He fell asleep, so I bundled him in the cart.”

Sarah nodded and disappeared back into the house. Lonnie took the basket and carried it to her aunt’s cart. The snug box sat on a single axle and could hold only two people on the narrow seat. What space was not taken up with feet and provisions offered a tiny corner for Jacob to sleep in. Sugar’s lead rope was tied to the back. The old mule’s eyes hung at half-mast, as if she were about to fall asleep any moment.

“That seems to be the last of it.” Sarah sighed and stepped out of the doorway. She secured the latch behind her. Lifting her face to the sky, she shook her head. “Fine weather to be traveling. Won’t you consider staying for a few days at least? A week? A month, even?”

“No. I need to be free of this place.”

Another month?
Lonnie’s eyebrows pulled together. She couldn’t imagine staying around another moment and was grateful her aunt had been at the ready. Lonnie dropped another blanket in the back of the cart, not caring that it came unfolded.

Determined not to cry, she put one foot in front of the other and climbed onto the small seat. She slid over as far as she could to make room for her aunt.

Sarah took the reins in one hand and slipped her other arm through the crook of Lonnie’s elbow. “Cozy, ain’t it?” Her smile faded when Lonnie did not respond, and she gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

With a click of Sarah’s tongue, Elliot, the old farm horse, was off at a slow trot. When the cart lurched into motion, Lonnie clung to her aunt. Sugar lumbered along, matching the pace.

“Wait!”

Lonnie knew that voice. She spun around on the seat to see her ma running toward them. Addie struggled alongside her, moving as fast as her short legs would allow. When the cart stilled, her ma slowed her pace and pressed a hand to her chest.

“I’m so glad I caught you,” she panted.

Lonnie jumped down and ran to her ma. When she drew closer, she noticed a fresh red mark, high up on her ma’s cheek. The makings of a bruise. Lonnie gasped. Maggie waved away her concern.

“I’m all right.” She covered her cheek with her hand. “Just a little argument.” Lonnie stared in disbelief as her ma fell to her knees in front of Addie. “Take your sister,” she pleaded. Lifting her face, her forced smile faded. Her cheek caught the sunlight, and her chin trembled. “I don’t want her to have this fate.”

Lonnie swallowed. “Of course I’ll take her. But what will you do without her?”

Maggie shook her head. “Don’t you worry none about me. I just want to know that my girls are safe. I’ve heard nothing but good things about the Bennetts. Please.” She tugged a thin wad of bills from her blouse and stuffed the paper in Lonnie’s hand.

Lonnie started to protest.

“I don’t want to take advantage of anyone.”

“But, Pa’ll know—”

Ignoring Lonnie’s words, her ma pulled her into a tearful embrace. “Give her a better life.”

“Oh, Ma, I will pray for you.”

Maggie sniffed and wiped her eyes. She cast a wary glance over her shoulder, then forced another smile. “Now off with you. You want to get a good start before dark.”

Lonnie knew what her ma meant. Hurry.

Within moments, space was made for Addie. She huddled in the back with her knees to her chin. Their ma pressed a kiss to the girl’s head and dropped a gunnysack of Addie’s belongings inside the already bulging cart. Before Lonnie could whisper another good-bye, Maggie darted around the front of the cart and slapped the horse on the rump. The horse jolted forward. Lonnie gripped the seat. She glanced over her shoulder and watched her ma’s figure grow smaller. Maggie waved overhead, and Lonnie lifted a hand in farewell.

Addie’s tiny voice stole her attention. “Am I gonna see Ma again?”

Lonnie exchanged glances with her aunt before replying. “Hopefully.” It was the only truth she could think of. “We’re gonna be together now. You, me, and Jacob. How does that sound?”

Addie nodded happily, then rested her chin on her knees and closed her eyes. Lonnie doubted if her sister understood the weight of her ma’s plea. The little girl would not be returning home. Lonnie thought of her own fate and the time that had passed since she’d finally returned to Rocky Knob.

When the cart jolted, she turned forward.

“So this is it,” Sarah said cheerfully.

The landscape changed as they started downhill, yet Lonnie saw no cheer in any of it. “This is it.”

Sarah nudged Lonnie in the side. “I’ll look after your ma. She’s gonna be fine.”

Words could not be found, so Lonnie nodded her head.

“You’re gonna be all right too.”

Looking off into the distance, Lonnie shrugged and Sarah fell silent. Her aunt’s words were meant as encouragement, but watching the sky ahead darken, Lonnie wondered if they were true.

Using his boot, Gideon kicked his thin sack to the other side of the wagon bed. He’d stuffed what little he owned into a gunnysack.

“Where we goin’?” he asked without looking at Cassie, who sat beside him.

A sweet smell lifted from the fabric of her dress.

“The cabin. Ma and I fixed it up.”

Gideon tugged at the patch of hair beneath his lip.

Huddled in the back of Henry’s wagon, he was careful not to bump into her as wheels jolted over ruts. The rain had started up again, and Gideon pulled his hat over his ears. Cassie drew her coat collar tighter beneath her chin. An old army coat, from what he’d seen of it. He tried to ignore her movements.