Thorn Boy and Other Dreams of Dark Desire (5 page)

‘
I hear
the Khan’s boy visited the temple yesterday. That request must be a
first for a captive of war!’

Lazuel rolled
his eyes. ‘I know about that. There are many firsts occurring in
the chambers of the king!’

Dread seized
me, but I managed to smile. ‘Such as? I understand Alofel did not
keep the boy with him the entire night.’

Lazuel
put down his basket and folded his arms. ‘Well, the lovely Akaten
did not
sleep
with the king
the other night, but this was because they stayed up together until
dawn! I took the precaution of concealing myself in one of the
dressing-rooms, just in case Alofel needed me, but spent a
sleepless night. I overheard much of interest.’

‘
Indeed!
Tell me about it.’

‘
I will,
for I think you should know. First of all, for several hours, they
took a light meal together and talked. I managed to overhear Alofel
asking many questions about the Khan. It’s clear that Harakhte
fascinates Alofel. He was especially insistent upon knowing about
Harakhte’s relationship with his people. Akaten said that many
would kill themselves when they learned of the Khan’s death.
Ordinary people in the street! It’s quite unbelievable. I think the
boy must have been exaggerating, but Alofel didn’t seem to think
so. The foreigner spoke so freely about Harakhte’s marvellous
attributes, I thought the king would call for his guards and a
sword to silence the insolent tongue! But no. He seemed oblivious
to the snide criticisms. Perhaps he did not hear the words, but saw
only the lips.’

‘
What
has happened to the famous grief then?’ I asked sourly. ‘The boy
conversed well for a person who only days ago was slashing at his
wrists.’

Lazuel pulled
a wry face. ‘Quite so. At the beginning of the conversation, the
Mewt’s voice was dull and sad, but after an hour or so our little
foreigner appeared to relax in the king’s company. He brightened up
considerably, and even told a few comic tales about certain Mewtish
dignitaries. The strangest thing is, I heard Alofel laughing. Have
you ever heard that?’

I shrugged
uncomfortably. In truth, Alofel was not a person disposed to
displays of hilarity, confining proof of his amusement to gentle
smiles.

‘
Yes, he
laughed,’ Lazuel said, nodding. ‘I have never heard him so
informal. Then, the worst thing happened.’

‘
What?’

Lazuel looked
to left and right, then leaned closer towards me. ‘The king never
took his pleasure! After the boy’s clever tales, Alofel must have
decided it was time to sample the goods. Before a single finger met
flesh, Akaten began to weep and lament, having no doubt drunk too
much wine and coughed up too many memories. It was incredible. He
thanked Alofel for his courtesy - the impudence of it! - and then
begged to be killed. He does not want to live now the Khan is dead,
and cannot bear the thought of another man touching him. As you can
imagine, Alofel was perturbed by this behaviour. Here comes the
order for the guards now, I thought, but again, no. At this point,
I felt I had no choice but to peer through the curtains. Alofel
took the boy in his arms and told him not to be afraid - the only
time he would take him to the royal bed was if Akaten himself
desired it. Can you imagine that?’

I couldn’t.
‘What else happened?’ My mouth was so dry I could barely speak. I
wanted to ask whether my name was mentioned, but feared Lazuel
making his own deductions.

‘
Nothing
much. Alofel spoke about life, honour and duty, and how we must all
learn to live with grief. Akaten asked for permission to visit the
temple, in order to perform the rites of mourning, and it was
granted. He returned in the evening, and last night slept alone in
the room that Alofel has provided for him. There is a rumour that
rich clothes and jewellery were sent to this room.’

I could no
longer hide my shock and dismay. ‘What you have told me is
incredible. I don’t know what to say.’

‘
Darien,
it is all too bizarre. I have never heard anyone, even of high
rank, behave so informally with the king. Displays of emotion,
weeping and laughing: the antics of an unmannered brute! But the
strange thing is, Alofel seemed to like it.’

I shrugged
uncomfortably. ‘Perhaps he was amused by the novelty of the
situation.’

Lazuel nodded.
‘This is possible, although I’d be a liar if I said I agreed with
you.’ He looked at me with sympathy. ‘I fear there will be
disruption. What will you do?’

I shook my
head. ‘I don’t know... It seems there is little I can do.’ In
comparison to Akaten, who could make Alofel laugh and relax, I felt
insubstantial and empty. The thought of resorting to poison against
such an enemy was dangerous. Alofel might be more inclined to
investigate should something happen to someone who had attracted
his attention so much.

Lazuel touched
my arm. ‘You can be sure the king’s staff support you. We don’t
want foreigners mucking up our routines.’

I spent the
remainder of the day in a delirium of nervous anxiety, comforted by
Porfarryah, who was equally alarmed by what had happened. In the
evening, when the king’s squire came softly to request my presence
in the royal chambers, I was convinced it was so that Alofel could
tell me he was sending me away. Hastily, I brushed out my hair and
applied pale powder to my hectic cheeks. Still, my mirror told me I
looked far from my best.

The man who
greeted me in Alofel’s quarters was a stranger, someone who looked
like the king, but whose character was completely different. He was
animated, his movements sudden. His eyes were alight. ‘Darien,’ he
said. ‘I need to talk to you.’

I could barely
speak, and bowed stiffly. Alofel seemed oblivious of my
appearance.

‘
Sit
down,’ he said.

I perched on
the edge of a brocaded chair and knotted my hands in my lap to
disguise the fact that they were shaking. Alofel stood staring down
at me, an expression of contemplation on his face. I did not want
him to look at me, sure he was making certain comparisons and
finding me wanting.

‘
Darien,
answer a question for me,’ he said. ‘I would like to know whether
you are happy.’

I looked up at
him in surprise. ‘I beg your pardon, my lord? Happy? About
what?’

‘
I want
to know whether you are happy in your position here at court as my
favourite.’

I blushed.
‘Yes, of course.’ The question was absurd.

He shook his
head. ‘No, I don’t think you quite understand me. What I mean is,
if you had the choice, would you be here at all? You were sent here
from your parents’ estate and have been forced to give up all title
to your inheritance. You did not come here of your own free
will.’

‘
My
lord, I am honoured to serve you. Whatever else my life might once
have held is no longer relevant to me.’ I was terrified, convinced
Akaten had said something to him about me. ‘And if anyone claims
otherwise, they lie!’ Normally, such a forward remark would earn
severe discipline, but Alofel ignored the tone of my
outburst.

‘
I do
not question your loyalty, Darien, but I have been thinking. I
never wooed you. I simply took you. You did not come to my bed in
desire but in subjection. Is it right for me to keep you here,
perhaps against your will, to use your body as I
please?’

‘
You are
the king!’ I whispered, horrified. ‘It is your right to do as you
please.’ Taking advantage of his strange mood, I asked a direct, if
timidly-voiced, question. ‘My lord, is it that you no longer want
me here?’

He reached to
touch my face. ‘I will always want you here, Darien. Although I
have never spoken of it, you have soothed me when I’ve been
distressed a thousand times. I have never wanted any boy here
regularly in my chambers but you...’

Until now, I
appended silently. I looked into his eyes and formed this thought
within them. Unable to hold my gaze, he turned away. I did not like
what had happened to him. It seemed as if a peculiar disease had
taken hold of his mind, and I hoped sincerely he’d not behaved this
way with anyone but me. I could only speak frankly. ‘It seems
something has come to this court that is causing a strange
disturbance. I know my traditional place, and there is no question
of me resenting it. My lord, I am distressed that you do not seem
to be yourself. Is there anything I can do to help?’

He turned and
looked at me again, his eyes once more filled with a weird inner
light. ‘I feel as if the last fifteen years have fallen from my
body, as if a mask of iron has fallen from my eyes. This should not
distress you, Darien. Please don’t worry about it.’ His gaze became
distant. ‘Today, I smelled the lost perfumes of childhood summers
in the air. In the garden, it was as if all the flowers and the
trees had become more colourful and vibrant. Sounds assailed my
ears from every side like music; the call of birds, the mutter of
servants, the hiss of wind in the leaves...’

Oh, Sweet
Challis, I thought. He is in love.

Alofel adopted
a posture of deep thought, his right hand cupping his jaw. After a
while, he said, ‘I can guess what you are thinking. That Akaten is
responsible for the way I feel. And you are right!’

I swallowed
nervously, waiting for the axe to fall.

Alofel began
pacing up and down. ‘I don’t want you to feel concerned for your
position. It is important to me that you befriend, Akaten.’

‘
What?’
I couldn’t help the exclamation. Alofel had truly lost his senses.
Where was the calm, contained man of only a couple of days before?
How could one person affect him so much? It was
outrageous.

‘
I am
still concerned for his state of mind, and have discussed it with
my physicians. We think it expedient that Akaten is kept euphoric
until such time as the sharpest edge of his grief has become blunt.
There is a risk he might try to take his life.’

Good, I
thought. ‘My lord, what do you think I can do to help this
situation? Such excesses of emotion are alien to me.’

The comment
was unwise, and I noticed Alofel’s wry glance when I’d uttered it.
‘I can understand that Akaten’s ways must seem uncouth to you, but
if you spent some time in his company, I have no doubt you would
warm to him. He spoke highly of the way you comforted him on his
first night here.’

I knew for a
fact that Alofel’s court would not approve of these developments.
He was charging blindly towards circumstances of embarrassment and
humiliation. Bewitched by beauty! How could he be so weak? I felt
that all I could do was comply with his wishes for the time being,
in the hope of somehow ameliorating the situation. ‘I will of
course obey your command, my lord.’

‘
It is
not a command, but a request,’ Alofel answered, and when he looked
at me, I sensed he was wondering whether, if ever anything should
happen to him, I would want only to die as well. The answer of
course was no, but I hoped he didn’t realise that.

As I walked
back to my rooms, I considered how confused the king must be
feeling. He had enjoyed Akaten’s romantic tales of Harakhte, and
wanted me to be like a Mewtish boy, a lover who could not bear the
thought of life without him. Legends spoke of how favourites took
their life upon the battle-field, to die beside their fallen kings,
but they were legends that came from other lands, not ours. Did
Alofel believe that if I were Akaten’s friend, his attitude towards
his king would rub off on me? Or was it just that he trusted me to
care for his new possession, and would keep it safe until he felt
the time was right to take what he so sorely wanted?

The following
day, reluctantly obeying Alofel’s injunction, I went to visit
Akaten in his rooms. My feelings too were utterly confused. I was
filled with excitement at the prospect of seeing him, but also
harboured feelings of outrage and envy.

I found him
out on the terrace, playing with a puppy - perhaps another gift. He
was sitting on the marble tiles, his long legs sprawled out, his
hair plaited loosely down his back. He looked up when his attendant
announced my arrival, and my heart stilled for a moment. I felt as
if I’d known him for many years. We had held each other intimately.
I wanted to go to him, take him in my arms, begin our conversation
with a kiss. But at the same time, my mind told my heart not to be
foolish. This foreign creature was not the one who had come to me
in the Shrine of Bestowing. My addled brain had provided that
image.

‘
Hello
again,’ he said. His voice was slightly slurred, and I could see
that the pupils of his eyes were large. His senses, clearly, were
not his own. ‘You look more like the Servant of Death than
before.’

I walked
towards him, maintaining an outward semblance of dignity. ‘King
Alofel wants us to be friends.’ He must have heard the coldness in
my voice.

For a moment,
he ignored me, dragging his hair across the marble to make the
puppy frolic, laughing softly like a hiccuping lunatic. Then, he
looked up again. ‘So, here you are, an obedient slave.’ He sounded
drunk, and even threw out his arms. ‘Would you care for
refreshment? The people here bring me anything I ask for.’

I folded my
arms and sighed through my nose. He was smiling at me. I did not
like the thought that he might be aware of my discomfort and
disapproval. Something snapped inside me. ‘I don’t like what you
are doing, Khan’s boy. You think you can cause trouble here in Cos.
Is this your revenge for your master’s death? You might be able to
fool Alofel, but I can see through you. Don’t believe that everyone
here is bewitched by you. I will fight you, every inch of the
way.’