This Broken Beautiful Thing (25 page)

After giving birth to Willow, I lost my baby weight after a few months of working out and running, apart from the various stretch marks in places there weren’t before, my body has
gone back to the shape I had before I fell pregnant. The fact that I’m wearing a pair of denim shorts I owned over four years ago is proof of how hard I worked to get back into the healthy size I’m at now. I know I will never be model skinny and nor did I want that but I worked hard enough so that I got to the point where I don’t wince every time I looked in the mirror. I’m getting there though, I feel better with myself these days.

Brent finds us a spot on the grass and Willow immediately sits on my lap
as she watches the surrounding people and large built up stage down the hill from us with wide eyes.

There
aren’t many kids around and that’s probably due to the fact that this is a college campus. I put some sun tan lotion on my little girl and offer Brent some.  He’s already in full conversation with Willow about what she was doing yesterday. I look inside the little bag I packed Willow to get her something to drink and I notice I must have forgotten it at home.

“Brent, can you watch her a minute? I’m going to get us something to drink. What do you guys want?” I say getting up and dusting my shorts off.

“I’ll have a coke babe.” He smiles at me.

She frowns at him and the next words that come out of her mouth make me hunch over and laugh till
my stomach hurts.

“No Bent! Don’t call mommy babe. She’s not a piggy!” Brent and I finally compose
ourselves but Willow is still standing in the same position she was earlier. Her hand on her hip, her face isn’t angry anymore it’s more confused as she looks back and forth between us.

“Yeah Bent don’t call me that!
” I wink at him and he chuckles then pulls Willow into his arms and tickles her. I walk away to the sound of my beautiful daughter’s laughter.

Standing in the queue by the food court stalls for cold drinks, someone bumps into me.

“Oh sorry.” I hear the familiar deep voice and I immediately feel butterflies in my stomach as I look into his beautiful green eyes.

“Harlz?” Caleb says looking shocked.

“Hi Caleb.” I say turning my eyes away from him as he
shamelessly continues to look my body over. He seems so much taller and his body has filled out well since the last time I saw him four years ago. He’s not a boy anymore, he’s all man.

“
It’s been what? Four years since the last time we…ah…saw each other. You’re looking
really
good.” He says running his hands through his black messy hair. I turn to look at him and I can’t help but run my eyes over his body, he doesn’t look like the guy I left here at the same park all those years ago. Caleb has turned into a beautiful man, I notice his one arm has a complete sleeve and I notice another tattoo peeking out under his black shirt near his collar bone.

I look up to see him
smirking, dimples and all. I look away. “Yeah thanks, ah…you too.”

“
Honey, how long does it take for you to fetch me something to drink? I was beginning to – uh …oh…Harley?” I hear a whiny voice behind him and I watch from the corner of my eye as Ashley wraps her arms around Caleb’s.

Of course they’re still together.
I inwardly roll my eyes.

I turn to lo
ok at her. “Hi Ashley. How are you?” I can’t help but feel the hurt that creeps in when I see them together. You’d think I’d be over him and what he does to me whenever I see him but no, not this heart, it flutters every time he’s in my presence.

“I…I’m
fine…and ah…you?” she stutters looking back and forth between Caleb and I.

I give her the biggest smile I could muster, “I’m great.”

“Mommy, momma look what Bent got me?” Willow comes running up to my legs with a teddy in her arms. I bent down so she is eye level. I don’t miss the gasp from Ashley and I sure as hell didn’t miss the shocked look on Caleb’s face as he watches his daughter jump into my arms. I pick Willow and the teddy bear up and then look over at Brent’s shocked face as he mouths sorry.

“
Cutest teddy ever baby girl.” I smile and kiss her cheek then look over to Brent again who seems rather pale as he gazes between Ashley, Caleb and I.

“Brent
, you spoil her way to much.” I smile at him and I watch as his shoulders relax and colour comes back to his face.

Caleb and Ashley are speechless
for a little while but of course Ashley is the first to speak up.

“Wow…”
she lets out a deep breath looking from Caleb to Willow, it’s so obvious since Willow is the spitting image of her beautiful father. “Is this…her?”  She says quietly and I look as Caleb’s head snaps in her direction as Ashley smiles at Willow.

I put
my daughter back on the ground and my polite little girl introduces herself. She walks up to Ashley, “Hello.” She says looking up to Ashley.

Ashley bends over not
fazed by the fact that people behind her could probably see her underwear under the short mini she’s wearing. I only hope Willow can’t see any of that from where she’s standing down there.

Ashley smiles at her and says, “Hello cutie pie. My name’s Ashley.” Willow giggles and moves her attention onto Caleb as she speaks to Ashley.

“No silly! My name’s not cutie pie.” Willow laughs and Ashley laughs while looking down at my daughter with a loving expression.

Caleb bends down so that he is eye level with Willow. We’ve moved out of the line by this point and Br
ent has already gotten our cold drinks. Willow smiles at Caleb and Caleb puts his large hand out to shake her tiny one. “What is your name baby girl?”

She puts her hand on her hip again and says with as much attitude that she can
muster, “I don’t know why everyone calls me that, even Jacey and Hunt Hunt, I’m not a baby. My names Willow.” Then she lifts her hand and shakes his big one with much determination.

I watch as Caleb looks at
her then up at me as he repeats, “Willow…” as if realization hits him, his eyes get all watery and I notice him swallow then he says with a ruff voice.

“Well
Willow, I’m Caleb and it’s very nice to meet you.” Caleb says smiling at me.

“Here Pillow I bought you an ice
-cream I know how much your momma loves cleaning you up after you get chocolate everywhere.” Brent chuckles and picks her up and throws her upside down and she giggles in his arms as they walk away. I pick up the teddy that she dropped just as Ashley opens her mouth

“She
’s so beautiful Harley, you did such a good job.” Ashley says coming in for a hug but I push her away.

“This who
le little…ah… reunion was...nice, but I’d really like to spend the rest of my day with my daughter.” I move past them but Caleb’s strong arm stops me around my waist then pulls me against his hard chest.

“
Whose is she? How old is she Harley?” he whispers in a serious tone.

I look back and forth between the two of
them, Ashley has an ashamed look on her face and her eyes can’t meet neither Caleb’s nor mine. I push away from Caleb.

I laugh and shake my head. “You know exactly
whose she is. Don’t come and play stupid with me Caleb. How old do you think she is? That night I caught you two together? I was just over three months, so yeah…you do the math. Beside, you should know all of this? Why are you acting like this is all news? Your girlfriend here…” I give Ashley a pointed look, “… told me you didn’t want Willow. I can understand the fact that you wouldn’t want me in your life but your own daughter? Really Caleb? I never expected that from you…but then again I didn’t expect the cheating either. Even though you two were together I still would have liked her to have a father around and I would have dealt with the fact that my ex was with my best friend or ex best friend…whatever. Why are you looking at me like that?” I ask Caleb , he looks like he may pass out and I’m confused as to why he looks so shocked.

“What did you tell her?” he roars at Ashley
, she looks back and forth between him and I. I notice various people watching us now. I’ve never seen Caleb this mad before. His knuckles are clasped and I see his jaw pulsing.

“I…I…I don’t know why I said that baby. I promise if we just leave now I’ll make it up to you later.” Ashley says in a flirty tone and I don’t want to hear how and what
making up to him later
entails. My heart clenches at the fact that they’re hooking up because even though I shouldn’t, I still think of Caleb as mine. It’s gotten a lot more crowded now and while they’re now talking to each other I slip away to find Brent.

Walking up to
Brent, I notice Willows face is covered in chocolate but she’s fast asleep on his lap.

“I’m sorry about earlier, I
shouldn’t of come looking for you but she was so excited about her teddy.” Brent says looking upset.

“No
it’s cool, don’t apologize, I’m tired of hiding away and we were bound to run into them sooner or later.” I say getting the baby wipes out the bag and gently wipe Willows little face careful not to wake her.

“Harley…I know I said I wouldn’t ask questions but I can’t keep this in any longer. Why did you keep her from him? You know how much he wanted to be with you and you know he would have been there for you regardless if you didn’t want him there.” Brent says in a more serious tone than I’m used to.

“Are you kidding me Brent? He knew about her! He knew I was pregnant but he still chose Ashley over us. I…I think it’s time I take her home, it’s been a long day ….for all of us.” I say putting Willows new teddy in her bag.

“What? No he didn’t know…or at least I didn’t think he did. He hates her Harley…they aren’t even-
” I interrupt him.

“Brent I’m done with this conversation, please can we just
leave it?” I ask impatiently, he sighs as he picks up Willow and we leave the park.

CHAPTER 21

After Willow w
as bathed and dressed I start on dinner. I placed my phone on silent because I couldn’t bear to deal with anyone else after the day I had. After letting the dough stand for the homemade pizzas I was making, I decided to grate some cheese and get the toppings ready. Willow was sitting on the carpet in front of the TV watching the cartoons.

I don’t
hear a knock at the door, instead I hear the keys in the lock before Jace walks in and immediately picks up Willow. After greeting her and putting her back down on the ground she instantly goes back to watching her movie.

“Hey babe.” He says pulling me in for a hug.

I haven’t seen Jace the past few weeks, he’s been on some job a few hours away.

“
Hey, how have you been? Haven’t seen you in a while.” I say finally moving out of his arms and heading over to the fridge to pour him something to drink.

“I know
. I’ve missed you guys. You miss me baby girl?” He calls out to Willow.

“Don’t
call me that. I told C…Caleb I’m not a baby anymore.” She says trying to remember his name.

I watch as she turns her attention back to the
TV and Jace snaps his head back to me as he speaks slowly.

“What did she just say?” he
asks seriously.

“We bumped into Caleb today. It was
awkward, he was with Ashley and when he asked about Willow it sounded like he never knew about her.” I said placing dishes into the dish washer.

“
We’ll have a word about this later.” He says looking back at Willow as she lies on the floor on her tummy and head resting on her hands looking up to the TV.

After Willow has
eaten her supper she went and sat on Jace’s lap in the lounge. Jace handles her so gently and I know one day he will make a great father. The relationship between Jace and I has been strained since the night I gave birth to her but we don’t let that affect his relationship with her.

She rests her head on his chest and Jace cradles her in his arms, it makes my heart melt at how caring he is. He looks up to me and smiles and I return it. After cleaning all the dishes and
showering, I come back to an empty lounge. I walk to Willows room just in time to see him tuck a sleeping Willow in bed.

I watch as he
sits on the corner of her little bed and moves the hair out of her face. He sits for a few extra seconds then kisses her forehead , I leave before he catches me staring and I start putting away all  the clean dishes, some are still wet from my faulty cheap dishwasher so I place them on the table and rack to dry.

As I just about close the dishwasher door with my foot I squeal as I’m being lifted in the air and placed on the kitchen counter. I squirm as the top of my bare thighs touch the cold
counter, I’m wearing pajama shorts and a strappy top. As I try lift my ass to get off the counter Jace positions himself between my legs and places his rough hands on top of my upper thighs.

Even after all that Jace has put me through I know my body still reacts to his touch
due to the fact that I’m unquestionably attracted to him.