The Wedding Secret (15 page)

Ever since her father died, Harper had had trouble sleeping. She remembered waking up to her mother crying during the night. When Charlie Snow had come into their lives, and brought his son, they’d disrupted the whole household and, again, sleep didn’t come easy.

So, when she awoke the morning after being with Kevin and saw the sun was bright and filling her bedroom, she wondered what the hell had happened. Glancing at the clock she saw it was well after nine in the morning. The last thing she remembered was waking up to find Kevin singing to Anna in the middle of the night. If she wasn’t in love with him already, that had done it.

Somewhere in the apartment, her baby made a sweet noise. Harper heard Kevin’s deep voice respond, and she wondered if this is how it would be if they were really together. Head over heels in love with each other. Married. Happy.

Harper heard herself sigh as she curled under the plush comforter, enjoying the warmth and softness in nothing but a T-shirt and panties. She was just drifting off to sleep again when she heard a phone ring. It was her work cell.

Work!

Dammit!
She was supposed to be logged in and starting her day. “It’s only Wednesday.” She whimpered. As she turned her body so she could get up, she heard Kevin again. He appeared in the doorway of the bedroom on her cell and holding Anna on his hip; the baby was drooling on his collarbone. “Last time I checked she was still asleep. Don’t ask questions like that, man . . .”

“Questions like what? Who’s on the phone?”

Kevin started when she spoke. “Oh, you’re up.” Passing her the phone, he smiled, and Harper melted. If she had any nerve whatsoever, she’d toss her cell into the closest drawer. “It’s Jason.”

Harper couldn’t believe she had a gorgeous man handing off a business call to her while she was still in her pajamas. That he was holding a drooling baby, that he’d let her sleep, was more of a miracle. He was dressed in the jeans and shirt he’d worn yesterday, and he’d obviously showered. But he hadn’t shaved, and that made it just about perfect. Now she
really
didn’t want the call. Bouncing Anna on his hip as she put the phone to her ear, Harper smiled and mouthed a simple thank-you.

He grinned back, winked, and took Anna to another room.
God, when did life get so good?

“Harper?” What was that? Oh, right. Her boss was on the phone and she needed to stop staring at the hot man who’d just left the room. The hot man with the baby. Was there anything sexier?

“Hi, Jason. Sorry about that.”

“Sleeping in?” her boss teased.
Wonderful.
This wasn’t just about Jason finding out she’d had a sleepover, but now Kevin’s sisters would know. And his mom. Nothing was sacred.

“A little. I don’t do it often. My boss is a pain in the ass.” He was no such thing, but he deserved the poke for being a smart aleck.

Jason laughed, and she could hear him smiling through the phone. She was glad things were better with him, but if things didn’t keep looking up for her and Kevin, everything could sour again. She grabbed for the notebook and pen she kept by her bedside for the occasional late-night emergency. “What’s up for today?”

“Actually, not too much. I called because you usually call
me
by eight o’clock to get on my ass about something. I was getting worried you’d had an accident, or had been abducted by aliens, or run off to Tahiti.”

“None of the above.” The warm fuzzy feeling that shot through her was surprising. He’d noticed she hadn’t called. He’d noticed. Between Kevin being . . . well . . . the perfect man, and Jason making her feel like she mattered, Harper thought for a moment she might break into song. Nice feeling, that.

“Okay, well, why don’t you go back to sleep or
whatever
, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” The way he said whatever made her giggle.

“Yes, boss.”

Once she was off the phone, Harper pulled on her big terry bathrobe and walked out of her room. On the counter in the kitchen were bagels and juice, and the coffee brewer was all set up with a fresh pod. The nicest surprise was feeling Kevin’s big arms slip around her from behind. “Did you go out and get these?”

“No, I called and had the bagel place on the corner deliver.” His mouth hovered around her ear, his lips softly grazing the sensitive skin on the side of her neck. Without a thought, she dropped her head to the side to give him more access. He didn’t do much, but continued to tease her until she leaned into him, ready for anything.

“I have to go,” he whispered.

“You are a very mean man,” Harper said, turning in his arms. Her hands settled firmly on his very solid chest. The very same chest she’d rested her head on most of the night.

“I’ll be back in two hours to take my girls out. Where do you want to go?”

“Out?” He wanted to go out with them. In public?

“Yes, out. It’s a beautiful day. I was thinking we could go to the park and then to lunch. Or we could drive out to the island and, I don’t know . . .”

Harper laid a finger on his lips and stopped the flow of words. “You confuse the hell out of me, you know that?”

He grinned, his blue eyes sparkling. “I find keeping you off-balance is a good thing.”

“Yeah, well, you’re angry with me. Remember that?”

“Oh, right. Angry. I forgot.” He pulled her tighter against him and left a peck on her lips. “I don’t like being angry.”

“No? Because there are about a hundred ways this thing can go south between us, and I . . .”

The words caught right in her throat. She was invested already. This couldn’t go bad between them, it just couldn’t.

“What?” His hands were traveling up and down her spine, making her knees feel a little soft. Okay, she had to say what she was thinking. No beating around the bush, just say it. Looking directly in Kevin’s eyes, Harper plowed forward.

“I just don’t know if I could handle it if we got in deep and then it didn’t work out. I’m already feeling it.”

There. It was out.

He didn’t say anything for what felt like forever. Then he raised an eyebrow, grinned, and kissed her quickly once again. God, she wished her heart would stop beating so fast. He was pressed so close he could probably feel it.

“The way I see it, we’re already in deep. We have Anna. The only thing left to sort out is how we’re going to deal with our relationship.”

“That’s true—”

“And we can’t do that unless we spend some time together.” He tipped his forehead against hers and his scent penetrated her to the core. It was subtle, clean.
Him
. “I still get seriously pissed off when I think about not knowing you were pregnant, but it’s changed. The anger is different. I know I had a part in why you did what you did.”

“Okay.” She could live with him being pissed. She certainly deserved it.

“But I think about all of it less and less. I just think about how amazing she is. The last couple of weeks with Anna”—he kissed her nose gently—“and with you, have made me mellow out a little.”

“I’m glad.”
Don’t break. Don’t break.
All she could think was that she wanted to let out the stress of the past few weeks in a shower of tears.

“We have to try. Don’t you think?”

Slipping her arms around his waist and dropping her head to his shoulder, Harper said the first and only thing on her mind—the single truth that had been driving her for the past year. “I’m scared.”

Pressing his lips into her temple, he whispered, “Me, too.”

***

She was scared. That was good because Kevin was scared shitless. Everything about them together spelled
disaster
, but they owed it to each other to give it a shot. They owed it to their daughter.

Kevin had been around plenty of kids. With his own family and teammates’ families, Uncle Kevin was always a good time. But those kids were other people’s children. Now that the baby was his, the emotions knocked him out. And looking at Harper, knowing she’d given him the gift of a child, was humbling. He didn’t want to waste any more of the day worrying. He was going to change his clothes and get back to Harper’s place so they could try being a family. Jogging the last block to his apartment, Kevin wondered if this was the turning point.

Logically, it had only been a couple of weeks since he’d found out he had a daughter, and he should still be pissed at Harper. But he wasn’t. She’d been so sorry, so accepting, and willing to take the blame for everything, it had been that much easier to forgive her. And while he still didn’t know her whole story, Kevin had come to the realization that he didn’t make it easy for her to tell him the truth.

He never thought about the lines he’d fed her about his career and commitment. They’d become such a part of his standard package with women, Kevin dished them out to Harper without a second thought. What he should have done was tell her the truth. That he cared for her. That he wanted to make a go of things. That he would try to stay close to New York. Instead, he talked about his contracts and the problems with being in a relationship.

No wonder she’d cut and run.

He wanted to take things slow between them, but after last night that wasn’t happening. Just as well; it was time for them to become part of each other’s lives. He knew he wanted Harper and Anna in his.

He wanted to show his two girls off to the world, and he would start today by taking them out in the city. This was his city, and Kevin knew he’d be recognized. If Harper wanted affirmation that he considered them together, she was going to get it. With luck, there would be plenty of pictures to document their day.

There was no doubt in his mind anymore that he saw this as being long-term. He wasn’t going to make the same mistakes twice, and he wasn’t going to lose his family again.

So today was going to be about the park and spending time together. It was a beautiful day, and Kevin knew Anna would love being outside in the fresh air. He just hoped Harper would enjoy it as well.

***

Harper didn’t know what Kevin had planned, but as they walked though Riverside Park with him pushing Anna in the stroller, taking in the sights, she stopped caring about plans and schedules and just enjoyed having a day to do nothing. She didn’t know what to expect when he suggested they go out, but she had a feeling he wanted to make her feel more secure. It was a sweet gesture, and one that was working. He’d been recognized by two park workers and introduced her and Anna to them as “my family.”

One of the men called her Mrs. Rossi, and Kevin, bless his heart, did not flinch.

It was a statement, to be sure, and Harper appreciated what it meant. He was doing everything for her, making sure there was no doubt about his commitment, and that was just fine.

“You hungry?”

“I am, a little,” Harper replied. “You have any thoughts?”

“There’s a great place for sandwiches near Eighty-Ninth. Interested?”

“Where’s that?” Harper knew the area was mostly residential, but she was always looking for a new place to grab something quick.

“My apartment.”

Harper glanced up at him from under the brim of her baseball cap. “Is that so?”

“It is.” His smile was wide and fun, and told her exactly what he had in mind, and food wasn’t the only thing. “What do you think?”

“I’d love to see your apartment,” she said sweetly. “Let’s go.”

***

Their location in the park wasn’t far at all from Kevin’s apartment on Riverside Drive, so the walk was short. They arrived just as Anna was getting hungry and fussy, so it was good they had some downtime.

His apartment was the opposite of Harper’s in that it was really big—he’d fibbed about that—modern, and bright. Windows encircled the living room, giving the occupants a gorgeous view of the Hudson River. It was clean and functional, and she could see why he’d been spending so much time at her place.

There was no doubt Kevin’s home was gorgeous, obviously done by a designer, but the place lacked his warmth.

Harper settled into the corner of the sofa to nurse Anna, and Kevin went to the adjoining kitchen to make them something to eat. It was a quiet, lazy afternoon, and it showed Harper what her life might have been like, what it could be like, with Kevin.

She knew he traveled and that he had a high-profile job, but she didn’t see the superstar, just the man. The father of her child, the man who held her, made her laugh, and had forgiven her.

Now she just had to trust him enough to love her.

There were a million reasons Harper wanted to stay home by herself on Thanksgiving. The biggest one was that she didn’t want to drop herself into the middle of Kevin’s happy and perfect family. Especially considering they still weren’t all too happy with her.

Mrs. Rossi had come to Reliance several days over the past few weeks to pick up Anna, and after each visit, they returned more in love with each other than the time before. So there was that. At least Mrs. Rossi hated her less. She had no idea how Caroline was feeling, and Meg, well, Meg hadn’t spoken to her in weeks.

It killed her. Meg was one of her best friends, and she’d screwed it up. Fortunately, no one at work knew there was a problem, and that had a lot to do with the fact that Jason was a total professional, but now Kevin had insisted that she and Anna go to Jason and Meg’s house on Long Island for a big fun Thanksgiving, which included a football game on the lawn and enough food to feed a third-world country. She was nervous mostly because she felt like she was intruding. Kevin assured her she wasn’t, that he’d told his family he wanted her there with Anna and that was it.

She knew that wasn’t “it.” Nothing was ever “it” with his sisters. Maybe she could be sick. That would work.

Harper couldn’t believe Kevin’s family had turned her into a coward. She was not a coward, and she resented that she felt like she had to hide.

Over the past few weeks, since they’d made love, she and Kevin had spent a lot of time together. But the passion of their reunion a few weeks before had cooled a bit. Kevin was definitely trying to control himself around her, paying attention to her and Anna in other ways, but every so often, the heat flared and they ended up in her bed. When he loved her, Harper felt like the luckiest woman in the world.

But he never stayed.

Harper adored being with him, however, she understood why he was trying to take it slow. He saw this as long-term. He didn’t want their relationship to be only about sex. She told herself over and over that it was fine. Really. Taking things slowly made sense.

Liar.

It sucked. She wanted Kevin so badly it hurt. She wanted him to cuddle on the couch, make love to her, wake up with her every morning. She was tired of slow. It was total crap, to be honest. Harper, for the first time in her life, was willing to risk everything for a family. She was willing to risk everything for Kevin.

The thirst for this was like nothing she’d ever felt before. The weeks apart and the weeks together had taught her there was no substitute for waking up with someone who loved you. There was no substitute for raising your child with the man who made your toes curl and your heart beat, and it was those insights that gave her pause. She not only started to understand herself, she started to understand her mother.

It’s what led her to call her mother and see, maybe, where Harper might fit into her life and if Hill was still part of the equation when it came to Mama.

Harper had come to grips with the fact that she was in love with the father of her baby. And now that she was, she started to wonder what her mother had gone through when her father was killed. Harper knew her dad was a marine sergeant and that her mother positively adored him. She remembered the night the doorbell rang and two men in uniform talked to Mama, obviously giving her the horrible news that her father wasn’t coming home. Her clearest memory of that night, though, was the one of her mother collapsing on the floor wailing her father’s name.

She remembered it all. And it was painful.

The kind of pain she witnessed is perhaps why her mother checked out. Why she got involved with all the wrong men. Why she couldn’t bear to love Harper.

The last thought was excruciating to think about, and it was nothing she could understand personally, but her husband hadn’t been brutally killed by a terrorist bomb in Beirut. Traumas like that change the game completely.

And for the first time in her life, Harper felt sorrier for her mother than she did for herself.

Anna fussed from her swing and Harper looked at the time. Kevin would be there to pick them up in fifteen minutes. He said he had a surprise, and Harper didn’t know if she wanted one unless he was telling her they could stay in her apartment, have turkey sandwiches, and make love all day.

It was going to be hell getting out of the city because of the parade, and the time in the car would just give her that much more time to get nervous.

She looked at herself in the mirror in the foyer and really hoped she wasn’t underdressed. She had on jeans, boots, and a pretty scoop-neck tunic sweater. It was a deep burnt orange, and she loved the feel of the cashmere against her skin.

But Kevin had said the Thanksgiving “dress code” was casual and she shouldn’t be too worried about what she was going to wear. That was easy for him to say. They
had
to keep him.

Harper was particularly happy with Anna’s outfit. Her simple, cream-colored corduroy dress was soft and embroidered with burnished orange and red leaves around the white Peter Pan collar. Matching tights and brown Mary Janes finished it off. She lifted her pretty girl out of the swing and held her close for a snuggle. Worst-case scenario, if the natives were hostile at the Campbell house, she’d just hold the baby. Her baby made everything okay.

The doorbell rang, and Harper knew that Kevin was the other person who would make everything okay. He’d been running interference with his family for the past few weeks and she, the woman who prided herself on her independence, loved that she had the support of this wonderful man. He made everything better.

Harper grinned as she turned the knob, thinking about her guy. She was such a girl. But Kevin wasn’t on the other side of the door.

Standing in the hallway, looking upset and frightened, was her mother.

Speak of the devil
.

“Mama?”

“I’m sorry to just come here. It took me forever. I took the bus.”

Harper took her mother by the arm and brought her into the apartment. When Harper touched her, she flinched a little, and every warning bell in Harper’s head went off. There was something very wrong, and Harper looked outside in the hallway to see if her mother was alone.

There was a single tote bag stuffed with clothes, and her mother looked like a refugee, but there was no one else.

“He’s not here. If I never see that rat bastard again, it’ll be too soon.”

Oh, shit.

“You took the bus here? How did you get from the bus terminal to my building?”

“I asked. I don’t know why people say New Yorkers are nasty.” Her mother’s soft Alabama drawl filled the room. “Everyone was perfectly nice and helpful. A police officer helped me get a card so I could take a bus that let me off by the museum. And then someone told me how to walk here. It wasn’t too far.”

Harper was amazed. Her country-born-and-bred mother, who had only been to the big city once, had navigated her way through two states and managed to find Harper in the hive that was New York City by getting help from a cop and a total stranger.
Damn.

“You did great, Mama.” Harper was sitting next to her and wanted more than anything to ask her what had happened, but she didn’t know if she wanted to upset her too much. She’d been through something, and Hill was going to pay for it, that much was certain.

“My goodness, Missy Anna,” she said to the baby, who blew a bubble and smiled in response. “You have grown since I saw you last month. She looks lovely, Emmy. Just like you except for those big blue eyes.”

The doorbell rang again and she rose, handing the baby to her mother, suddenly being aware of her injured arm. “Are you okay to hold her, Mama?”

Tucking Anna next to her on the couch. “We’ll be fine. Who’s here?”

“Kevin’s here. Anna’s daddy.”

Her mother’s eyes opened wide and she ran a hand over her hair and straightened her plain blue top. “Oh. Oh! I’ll be happy to meet him.”

Harper nodded. She hurried to the foyer and pulled the door open.

“Let’s get moving. I found a parking space, but I’m worried I’ll get boxed in.”

“We can’t go this second.” Harper checked the hallway again and closed and locked the door.

“We’ve been through this. You are coming for Thanksgiving. I don’t know how else I can convince you that it will all be fine.”

“This isn’t about me. My mother showed up a couple of minutes before you did.”

“Your mother? You weren’t expecting her, were you?”

“No. Something’s wrong.” She pulled him into the small bathroom by the front door. “She’s by herself. Took the bus to Port Authority and found her way here. All she has is a totebag full of clothes. It looks to me like she ran.”

“Oh, man. No stepbrother in sight?”

“Not that I saw, but he won’t be far behind if he wants something from her.”

Kevin pulled her close, wrapping one arm around her neck and holding on.

“I can’t leave her.”

“Of course you can’t. She’ll come with us.”

Harper had never considered taking her mother to Meg and Jason’s for dinner. “I don’t know . . .”

“You’re not staying here alone with her when she could have been followed by a lunatic.”

Okay, he’d just scared her. Pretty much to death. “When you put it that way, okay. I’ll have to get her ready. She’s a mess. Call Meg, let them know, and then we need to find a way to get there.”

“Why? I’ll drive.”

“In your car? There’s barely enough room for the three of us.”

“No,” he said. “I bought a new car.”

He was just full of surprises today. Harper reached out and hugged him. She didn’t say anything and to be honest, she didn’t know why she was hugging him except that it made her feel better. Safer.

He took her hand and walked into the living room with her. That’s where he saw the frail woman who was Harper’s mother. Knowing how women looked in this world when they had access to clothes and stylists, Harper’s mother looked much older than her fifty-four years. Of course, it seemed she’d been through hell.

Her mother turned and her breath caught at the sight of Kevin. “Oh, Anna,” she said to the baby. “Your daddy is very handsome.”

“Mama, this is Kevin Rossi. Kevin this is my mother, Diane Snow.”

“Mrs. Snow, it’s a pleasure.” He shook her mother’s hand like she was the queen of England.

“Kevin. It’s nice to meet you.”

He smiled and his dimple creased. “I’m going to call my sister and tell her we’re running late and we have one more coming.”

“What?” Her mother looked panicked. “Where are we going?”

“To Kevin’s sister’s house on Long Island for Thanksgiving.”

“I can’t go anywhere. I don’t want to impose, and look at me. Those are rich people, aren’t they?”

Diane clutched the baby to her and a tear leaked out of her eye. “I traveled for two days to get here. I know you didn’t want me to come, but I had nowhere else to go. I barely had time to get my things.”

Harper sat down next to her on the couch and reached out her hand, rubbing her mother’s back and trying to soothe her. “You did the right thing coming here.”

“I can’t go anywhere, though.”

Kevin came back in the room and Harper handed him the baby. “Give me forty-five minutes,” she said. “Mama needs to get ready before we go.”

Her mother looked shocked, but barely gave an argument. “I don’t . . .”

Rising to her feet Harper helped her mother up. “Fortunately for you, you have maintained your girlish figure, and I’m sure I have something that will fit you. Let’s go. First thing you need is a shower, and then we have to find you an outfit.”

They entered Harper’s bedroom, and Diane sat on the bench at the end of the bed. “Your gentleman is very nice,” she said.

“He is nice, but he’s not my gentleman.” Harper didn’t really want to explain, and thankfully, her mother didn’t ask. Harper, though, had some questions. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

She shook her head. “Not right now. I will, but I can’t think about it right now.”

“Okay. Let me get you some towels and you can shower. What size shoe do you wear?”

“An eight.”

“Perfect. I have some pretty flats in size eight from when I was pregnant.”

“This is very nice of you, but I could just stay here. I don’t know how to talk to people like your friends.”

“Mama, Kevin’s family is very nice. Yes, there’s a lot of money involved, but that’s not what they’re all about. You’ll be fine.”

Her mother took the towels, and they walked together into Harper’s bathroom. She set the water, showed her mother where the shampoo and body wash were, and then left her to get clean.

She went to her closet and looked at some clothes she had, but had never worn. Her mother was small, maybe even a size smaller than her. Unfortunately, it appeared her mother’s slender figure was more about not having enough to eat than trying to fit into any particular size. She found a pair of simple black trousers and a lovely and very simple dove gray turtleneck sweater that would look perfect. With a pair of black bow flats, she’d look stunning.

“Hey.” Harper turned around to see Kevin in her doorway. “Any idea what happened?”

“She’s not telling.” He didn’t have the baby. “Where’s Anna?”

“Asleep in her crib. You timed it perfectly. She’d have slept the whole ride to Meg’s.”

“Dammit.” His smile drew her right to him and she planted a kiss on his lips. “Thank you for being patient.”

“It’s fine. I’m here for you, you know that.”

“I know. Oh, I just heard the water go off. See you in a bit.” She nudged Kevin into the hall and closed the door. Her mother came out of the bathroom and that’s when Harper saw the smudged purple marks on her mother’s left arm. Marks that were left by someone’s hand.

“I found some clean underwear and a bra in your tote. Why don’t you put them on and then I can do your hair and makeup.”

Her mother didn’t argue and did just as Harper asked. Fortunately, her hair was short and easy to manage, she didn’t need a lot of makeup, and when she slipped on the gray sweater, her mother sighed. “I had a scarf made of cashmere once. Your father gave it to me.”