The Wedding Secret (13 page)

“Hey,” he said. “I was debating whether or not I should wake you.”

“You should have. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. You obviously needed the sleep.”

“Your family must think I’m the worst mother ever.”

Kevin stood and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “No. I think they kind of like knowing you’re not perfect.”

She wasn’t perfect. Not even close. Everything about her was a hot mess, from her career to her personal life. If she wasn’t careful, she’d mess up Anna, too. Maybe she was destined to become her mother. Maybe it was in the DNA.

It killed Harper to know mothering would never be easy for her. That she’d constantly be fighting the ghosts of her past. But she would do anything for Anna. Absolutely anything.

“Are you feeling okay?” Kevin took a step toward her and dropped a steady hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay that you slept, you know.”

“Was she good for you?”

“She was a little cranky, but my mom only left about an hour ago. I had a crash course in feeding.”

“You found her milk?”

“I did. She’s sleeping. Now, again, are you all right? I’ve seen you run on two hours of sleep for days, you don’t take naps. Especially five-hour ones.”

She didn’t take naps as a rule, but she’d been so exhausted. “I’m just so tired trying to do everything. Maybe it would be a blessing if Jason fired me. Between work, the commute, and taking care of her, I’m at the breaking point.”

“Can you take some time off?”

“I guess I could. I don’t know.”

“Maybe you should think about it.” Kevin stepped back and Harper immediately missed his closeness. His body radiated so much warmth it was hard not to want to be near him.

“I will.”

“If you need support for her . . .”

“I don’t need money. I’ve saved.”
But I do
need you
, she thought.
Just you.
The realization was like a whip crack against her psyche. Something completely new for her. She not only needed Kevin Rossi, Harper
wanted
to need him. She wanted him. Period.

Lord, how did this happen?

She’d not only had this man’s baby, she’d fallen in love with him. Against every bit of good sense, against every instinct to protect her heart, Harper was head over heels in love with a baseball player.

Snap out of it!
she told herself.

Her heart said,
No.

“I should go. I’m meeting some people later. Will you be okay?”

“I’m fine. Have a good evening and thank you.”

“No problem.”

Harper had to smile. “Remind your mom that I meant what I said earlier. She can come over anytime. If she’d ever like Anna for the day, I can bring her to the office and she can pick her up.”

“You’d be okay with that?” Kevin seemed genuinely surprised how much trust she was willing to put in his family. But how could she not? They weren’t just his family, they were Anna’s, and even if Harper kept her own expectations low, her daughter deserved the big, noisy family she’d always wanted. “I completely trust your mother, Kevin.” Harper didn’t know what made her do it, but she let her fingers brush over his cheek, and the contact shocked both of them. “I trust both of you.”

***

That did it.

Everything came together for Kevin in that split second and it all finally proved to be too much. The time apart, the waiting, her scent and that sweetness . . . his sweet Harper . . . Kevin couldn’t hold out anymore. His head dropped and she seemed to freeze. Their eyes held on each other and Kevin tried to read what was in hers. He saw fear, but more than anything he saw want. It was like the dreams he had when he was away from her. The dreams that he fought against but couldn’t help. In them, he would kiss her endlessly. The taste of her, the feel of her in his arms still haunted him, but this wasn’t a dream.

Kevin lifted his hand and it slid across her jaw, gently cupping her cheek. Her eyes were closed now, almost like she was remembering her own dreams and she tilted her face into his hand. He didn’t want to kiss her until her eyes were open. He wanted her to see him, see what he felt for her and that he would do this however she wanted. When the lids fluttered open, Kevin brushed his lips across hers and they settled into a slow rhythm of tentative sips.

He felt her arms stretch up and soon her fingers were in his hair. His arms were firmly around her and neither one of them wanted the moment to end, but as if they read each other’s thoughts, they broke from the kiss at the same time.

She clung to him, hanging onto his neck and Kevin did the same holding her firmly against him.

“Do you have to go?” she asked. The question was laced with suggestion and promise and hope.

Kevin looked at Harper’s eyes, looked really deep and he knew that he couldn’t leave. He couldn’t leave for so many reasons, but the biggest one was that his heart belonged to her. They could chalk all the heat up to physical attraction, but for Kevin, this was about so much more.

Pulling her close and whispering against her cheek, the softness of her skin pricked at his senses. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Kevin needed Harper like he needed to breathe. There was no way around the feelings he had for her, and he was tired of trying to stay away. Ever since last year when he made love to her at Caroline’s wedding, he’d known this woman was for him. Everything about her called his name, and Kevin, not being a stupid man, decided to listen.

“I’ve been dying without you,” he said. “Dying. Every time I’m near you I want to drag you to the floor and love you.”

“I’ve wanted you, too. I’ve missed you, and I’m sorry about—about everything. I made such a mess of this.”

“It’s okay. You told me and we can fix it now. We can.”

His hands ran down her body in a long lush stroke, eliciting soft sounds that brought back memories of their first time together. He thought about the noises she made for him then. Every sigh, every groan he coaxed out of her with his hands and mouth and tongue. She was so responsive it was like opening a present each time he did something new to her.

A year ago he knew this body, knew what she would like, but she wasn’t the same woman now. She was a little heavier and rounder. Her gentle curves had become soft and full. There was more suppleness to her, and Kevin already knew she’d be heaven to touch.

Her arms were wrapped around his neck and he clutched her to him, lifting her off the floor and carrying her to the bedroom with her feet dangling. He’d done very dirty things to Harper in this room, but tonight he was going to love her slowly.

Laying her back on her bed, he leaned over her, loving how she looked with her dark, silky hair fanned out on the pillow and her large, round eyes gazing at him. In the soft light of the bedroom, her eyes sparked gold and green, and he felt like he was in the presence of a fairy. She was magic . . . light and dark, holding him with her spell. There were times in the past when he’d wondered about that, if she’d cast some type of spell on him, and holding her in his arms, touching her body, Kevin realized he didn’t care.

Why he was there was irrelevant. The only thing that mattered was how good it felt to be close to her again.

“I need you, Kevin.” Her hands were already working the button on his jeans, and Kevin had to slow her down. He hadn’t been with a woman in a few months, and he was ready to explode. If she touched him it would be all over.

“Slow down, baby. Be patient.”

“I don’t want to be patient.”

His hands went to work again, sliding under her sweater and feeling her soft skin give under his hands. “God, I love how you feel,” he said. “You’re perfect.”

“Far from it,” Harper said. “I’ve gained a lot of weight, and the stretch marks . . .”

“Are proof of the gift you’ve given me. They’re proof of Anna. I wouldn’t want you any other way.”

“I wanted to tell you so badly. But I’d hear you all the time talking about the women you were seeing and how you never wanted a family.”

“You had to know that was just talk. When we were together—”

“You decided to leave.” Her eyes locked on his. “It doesn’t matter now. I didn’t know why you’d want me, Kevin. I’m nothing special.”

Nothing special? The woman was a powerhouse. Brilliant and beautiful. He couldn’t imagine what she wanted with a jock like him, but apparently she did, and Kevin wasn’t going to question her. “Harper, stop listening to me.”

“Really?” She nuzzled against his neck.

“Yes, really. I’m a dumb-ass.”

Her slight giggle sent a puff of air over his skin, and he shuddered at the feel. “Okay. If you say so.”

“I’ve missed you and I’m sorry if you thought I wouldn’t be there for you.”

Her kiss was perfect, and Kevin turned them over so she was on top and without thinking about it, let her take the lead. They’d never played it like this before, and he could tell by the way she straddled him, he was going to love it.

***

“Mmmm. This is going to be fun,” she purred. Sliding her hands under his shirt, she eased it up his torso and he pulled the last bit over his head. Harper ran her hands over his muscled chest with the patch of hair that went the distance, right into the waist of his jeans. She loved that he had some body hair. So many guys were grooming within an inch of their lives, it was almost disturbing. Not Kevin Rossi. He was a man, and in his world men didn’t wax.

Harper loved so many things about him, his gorgeous face and body were one thing, but it was his kind heart that had finished her off long ago. She still didn’t think she deserved him. She’d made so many mistakes, and he just kept forgiving her.

Her lips grazed over his collarbone and the stubble of his jaw, and finally landed on his full lips. She wanted to make love to him. Give something to him for giving her their beautiful baby, and this was all she could think of.

Kissing him again, Harper worked the buttons of his jeans open and eased down the fly. His erection was peeking through the opening in his boxer briefs and she could see that he was suffering as much as she was.

“You need to be naked,” he ground out. At first, Harper hesitated, but she forced herself to stop worrying about her body’s imperfections and focus on the way he was making her feel. She had a gorgeous man in her bed who cared about her and wanted to see her naked.

Standing next to the bed, Harper pulled the shirt over her head, released her bra, and took off her yoga pants and underwear. For the first time in a year, she was naked in front of a man, and if he didn’t like her postbaby body, she couldn’t tell from the way Kevin was looking at her. The expression on his face was ravenous.

God, he made her hot.

She tossed her hair, crooked her finger and gave him her best come-hither look, but what did the bastard do? He burst out laughing.

“Shit, Kevin.” Harper stomped her foot. “That wasn’t what I was going for.”

Kevin sat up and chuckled. “I’m sure, but you should have seen your face. What the hell were you doing with your lips?” He reached for her hand, but she slapped it away, and wisely he backed off. Still, he was grinning like a fool and she was pissed.
Kinda
. Okay, not really, but she could pretend.

“God, Harper,” he said. “You’re so pretty, I just love looking at you. But when you try to do the whole sexy, slutty thing . . .”

He leaned on his knees and dropped his head and was trying his best not to laugh, but she could see his shoulders shake and the next thing Harper knew she was laughing with him. “So I’m not sexy?”

“No! That’s not what I meant. Damn.” He grabbed for her again, and she took another step away.

“I’m three and a half months postpartum and you laughed at my seduction.”

“I’m sorry, but . . .”

“I’ll show you.” She went to the iPod she had in the dock on her dresser and after looking through it she pressed the screen and the next thing she heard was JT singing “SexyBack.” Then Harper started to dance.

But she wasn’t being serious, she was acting like a total goof. At this point, all Harper wanted was to laugh with him.

He knew she was being silly. She could see it on his face and he was enjoying it. Harper might not do the sex-kitten thing very well, but she’d been taking dance classes for the past couple of years so she could stay fit and flexible. It had paid off. She was very flexible and, based on the reaction she noticed between his legs, he liked the way she moved. Silly or not.

Swaying her hips and moving toward him, she helped him stand and then slipped her hands inside his jeans and let her fingers slide over his ass as she pushed his pants and boxer briefs down his long muscular legs.

He was beautifully built, from his wide, banded shoulders all the way down to his narrow hips, tight ass, and large, powerful thighs. Kevin was a magnificent sight. Harper stepped back for just a second and let her gaze wander over him one last time. Knowing she was going to make his knees buckle, and he deserved at least that for laughing at her, Harper reached out with her index finger and stroked his erection.

He sucked in a breath with a hiss, and Harper smiled. “We’re going to have some fun, you and me,” she cooed. Then she knelt in front of him and before he could say anything, Harper took him in her mouth.

“Fuck, Harper. Oh, shhhhit.”

She didn’t say anything; instead she let her lips and tongue administer the kind of torture Kevin most assuredly deserved. He moaned, swore, and tangled his fingers in her hair. Harper enjoyed every second of the control she had, enjoyed the small thrusting motion of his hips. Without a thought, she let her mouth work over him, tease him, and her reward was being able to hear his ecstatic moans.

That made the moment he dragged her up his body that much more a shock.

“I want us to come together,” he said backing up to the bed and sitting when his knees hit the mattress. “Come with me, Harper.”

The moment had gone from light and playful to sexy and hot. Intimate.

His words were so sweet and tender she almost cried, but instead she stroked his hair back and left soft kisses on his face as she lowered herself onto his erection. She controlled his entry, and watching his face as he sunk farther in was bliss. He was so large, it took a second for her body to adjust, but when it did, the sensation of him inside her was perfection. Like being joined with her other half.

Clutching each other, Harper’s fingers laced though Kevin’s hair and she cradled his head against her breasts, loving the pure surrender. Their movements took on a rhythm, and their bodies were part of a song.

She accepted his surging form without question, loving the power of his movements, the strength in the way he held her.

The way she responded to him took Harper out of her own body, until the waves of pleasure hit like a tsunami. “Kevin,” she whispered into his hair. “Oh, my God—”

There was an explosion of sensation that was strong, fiery. He was inside her—her heart, her body, her mind. And the thought of it terrified her. He was everything, and considering the possessive way he held her, she guessed he felt the same way.

Both of them had so much to learn about love and trust. There were things he didn’t know about her. Things that could drive him away.

But being with him felt so good, and as he pushed into her one last time and found his own release, the cry that came from Kevin wasn’t what she’d expected. It was quiet, content.

It was perfect.

Making love with him was probably a mistake for many reasons, but it was a mistake she could live with.

Hopefully he could, too.

***

Kevin woke and glanced at the clock.

It was after midnight, and the chill in the bed let him know he was alone. He’d slept two hours since the last time he’d made love to Harper, and he was still in a stupor. Muscles hurt that he hadn’t known he had, but all he could do was smile. Each time they came together, she did something to surprise him.

And being surprised was just one thing. The woman was amazing—loving, beautiful, trusting, sexy, giving—the list was long. She was like no one he ever knew . . . including the Harper he’d known before. There was a recklessness about her, a fearlessness he’d never expected to see.

Sitting up and putting his feet on the floor, he shook off the daze before he stood, found his shorts, and set out to find her.

Following the noise, he headed to the kitchen and came upon a sight he might term as a miracle. Harper had thrown on a shirt and was ass-end-up going through the refrigerator.

“You want to tell me,” she said, turning toward him, “how we managed to miss dinner? I never miss a meal.”

He laughed and went to her. She was still rumpled and flushed and totally kissable, which he knew was a very bad idea. He looped his arms around her waist and pulled her close.
Damn
, he thought. He could get used to her. He should go home before he did something outrageous, like propose.

“I’m hungry,” she said.

“Want me to be a cliché and make you an omelet?” he asked.

Harper giggled. “No. I think there’s a pizza in the freezer, want to check?”

He pulled open the freezer and was greeted by pints and pints of Haagen Dazs ice cream. Butter pecan, to be exact.

“I thought my sister had a problem with Ben & Jerry’s, but this is a sickness you have here.” Caroline was addicted to Ben & Jerry’s and now that she was pregnant, she had no fewer than eight different flavors in her freezer.

“What’s the problem? I’m nursing and I need calories.”

“Honey, there has to be twenty pints of ice cream in here.” He wasn’t kidding, either. The entire freezer, top to bottom, was filled.

“It was on sale?”

“Come on . . .”

“They don’t always have it. I don’t want to run out.”

Kevin shook his head. “Unreal.”

“What?” She nibbled at her thumbnail in the most adorable way. It made Kevin think of all the things he could be chewing on if she just came back to bed.

“I had no idea you had a latent crazy streak.”

She stared at him, dead-on. It was like he’d just slapped her. “You didn’t know?”

She totally deadpanned it. Then she grinned and made him laugh, and that, he thought, was a gift she’d given him. His laughter was back.

Not realizing how much he missed it, Kevin thought about his father. Mike Rossi was a big, happy man who could make him laugh like no one else. He remembered times when he was a little boy learning to ride a bike and as a teenager learning to drive a car, his father made things fun and easy. Kevin missed laughing.

Until now. Harper made him laugh.

He grabbed her and pulled her in, kissing her soundly. He was beginning to think kissing her was one of the top three things in his life. Her kisses were perfect.

“Let me go. I need nourishment.”

He groaned and released her, and she opened a drawer and rummaged for a spoon.

“I’m amazed you can walk,” he said.

Turning around, she bit her lip and smiled coyly. “Me, too.”

With one smooth move, Harper pushed herself onto the counter and sat, with legs dangling. She flipped off the top of a pint of ice cream and started eating out of the container.

He approached, and when he settled between her legs, she fed him a spoonful of ice cream, while her legs twined around his waist. It was incredibly intimate, and in a few minutes, he would have enough strength back to take her on the kitchen floor.