The Valkyrie (21 page)

“Nope,
enlighten me.”

“It was fucking
terrifying. She made light work out some of the mentalist
Berserkers they have.”

“What do you
think of Bea?”

“I can’t make
my mind up. She’s very clever. You can see her sizing everyone she
meets up and making some sort of judgement. She’s clearly at least
part sea nymph as she has a similar colouring to you but there’s
just something about her that just throws me.”

Glory nodded in
agreement. “So just crystal meth and smack then?”

***

Liberty was
driving down Chancery Lane when she saw Bea outside the
MacDonald’s. Liberty pulled over and wound down the window.

“Do you want a
lift?” she asked.

“Yes please.”
Bea got into the passenger side. She leaned across the car and
kissed Liberty. “Let’s do something fun tonight.”

“Like what?”
Liberty’s car pulled out hurtling them eastward.

“Let’s go out.”
Bea said.

“Sure, girls’
night out.” Liberty said connecting her phone to the car speakers.
Kanye West’s
Power
started blaring.

“No just the
two of us.” Bea’s hand was on Liberty’s knee.

“Like a
date?”

“Exactly like a
date.”

“Go on then.
What’s the plan?”

“Let’s just go
to a bar in Angel and get a drink.”

“Alright.”
Liberty said turning the car around. She quickly looked into the
future and was pleased with how lovely their evening would go.

***

Glory rang
Shady Tim for the third time that month. He had agreed to make the
drop if she’d go and meet him in thirty minutes in Victoria Park so
Glory and Honour set off. They had a can of White Lightening each
and Honour was gabbling about how excited she was to go on the
swings without there being any awful children moaning at her that
it was their turn like last time. They walked for twenty minutes
and sat down on the agreed bench. Shady Tim arrived five minutes
later and they made the trade. He had bought two big Tesco bags for
life with him.

“I’ve got to
leave the country for a bit.” Shady Tim said shifting about on his
feet.

“Off on
holiday?” Honour asked.

“No it’s
getting really difficult to shift the quantities that you keep
requesting. The fuzz are closing in on us. I thought I’d go and lie
low in Brazil for a bit until the storm blows over.” Shady Tim
said.

“Well the
weather’s nice this time of year.” Glory said.

“Yes that’s
what I’ve heard. I’m looking forward to going to the beach every
day. Please send my regards to your employers.”

“Of course I
will.” Glory said, she wasn’t sure how Odin and Freya knew Shady
Tim but she’d pass on his regards all the same. Shady Tim shook
hands with Glory and Honour before disappearing back to the flat he
shared with his mother Doris.

“I’m going on
the swings now.” Honour bounded along the grass to the children’s
play area.

Glory turned
and faced the god who had appeared next to her on the bench. She
looked him in the eye and arched an eyebrow. “So…”

“So…” Ares was
desperately fighting the urge to throw his arm around her and kiss
her and what not whether she wanted him to or not. He didn’t think
that was appropriate when trying to seriously court a girl though.
Hera had been giving him pep talks for years about such matters of
etiquette.

“I take it you
have something important to report on the war?” Glory asked.

“Which war?”
Ares asked.

“Either of
them.”

“Well that
thing in Korea you may or may not have organised should be
marvellous. What do Freya and Odin do all day?” Ares moved closer
to her on the bench.

“And the other
one?” Glory was furious and conflicted. She disliked being pursued
but at the same time his mouth was shapely.

“There are no
further developments at the moment. Although between you and me
there is something amiss with Athena at the moment.”

“Yes I’d
noticed that.” Glory said. Ares was going to kiss her.

“Most
suspicious.” Ares said moving in. He didn’t want to have to rape
her to have his way.

“Indeed.” Glory
felt someone’s gaze upon her which spooked her and like a horse she
bolted. She ran to the playground with her smack and grabbed
Honour. She turned around to see that Ares had gone home out of
frustration. He’d take it out on Aphrodite. Glory could see Apollo
leaning gently up a tree smoking a cigarette staring at her
intently. He had witnessed the whole scene and was displeased.
Apollo had an irrational hatred of competition, particularly when
he considered Glory to be his already. Glory’s phone vibrated, she
had a message from Apollo that said ‘Baby, don’t do this to me. I
love you. Please trust me. Don’t do this to me. Don’t leave the
house tomorrow? Just stay in your room and look cute. I love you. I
left you a sonnet on your pillow.’

Glory woke up to find Liberty standing
beside her bed with a whole jug of ambrosia in one hand and a
megaphone in the other. Liberty’s left eye was twitching ever so
slightly and she was dressed in a light green shift dress that made
her look like a fifties housewife. Glory never wore pyjamas.

“Get the fuck
up, it’s an emergency.” Liberty screamed down the megaphone, she
was considering whether to start physically shaking Glory but she
feared the consequences.

“What…” Glory
said with half closed eyes “Sleepy…”

“We’ve been
invited to tea with Hera on Olympus. I think Freya has been invited
too by the looks of it. You’ve got twelve missed calls from her.
I’ve not responded to the invitation yet, I panicked and thought
I’d leave it you to decide the course of action.” Liberty said.

“I’d rather
pull out my own innards and wear them as a feather boa than go to
tea today. Have the other two been invited?” Glory meekly threw the
covers off.

“Nope, just me
and you. We’ve got to be there at 3pm and it’s already 9.30am.”
Liberty was getting fidgety.

“Lucky fuckers.
Ok so we’ve got a good four hours to come up with a strategy to get
through T-Day. We will come out the other end of this as better
goddesses.” Glory said as she rolled out of bed and onto the floor.
“Well I will once I’ve had a shower and a drink. I’m half-cut
still. In the meantime respond graciously to the invite and enquire
as to who else we shall have the pleasure of taking tea with. When
you find out who will be there set up a scenario on the kitchen
table. I’ll ring Freya back, she could be ringing about anything.
Afternoon tea is my bloody thing, my lot invented it.”

“Your lot?”
Liberty asked. This was a new development. Glory had always
referred to the Angles of that miserable isle as her mother’s even
if they were under Glory’s de facto control. She really had killed
her mother hadn’t she?

“Yes the bloody
English. Hera won’t serve it right I’m sure. I dread to think what
her china looks like.” Glory found a towel and went to the bathroom
taking the ambrosia with her. She also took her phone just in case
she needed to field any emergency calls. Her words earlier had
stuck in her throat. Where did that come from? Glory didn’t
normally give a shit about Wedgewood.

Glory drew a
bath. As she and Liberty were practically marching into battle and
she needed her best armour on, ergo she deserved an extra lovely
soak so she threw all sorts of magic into it. Some salts that made
her skin extra soft and glowing, some dried rose petals that made
her smell divine and she’d treble conditioned her hair to make it
look super glossy. Aphrodite was going to have a bitch fit. Glory
could see the magic swirl in the steam, she bought all her
toiletries from this wonderful little nymph run boutique place in
Camelot. Before she got in she tuned the radio in the corner to
Classic FM and glanced at the looking glass. Seeing herself in the
mirror like this used to be so hard, but over the last couple of
days it had become much easier. The awfully pained Valkyrie that
she used to see reflected back was becoming the confident goddess
that she often projected but never really felt. She was at ease
with herself. The world was definitely changing and Glory was
changing with it. Glory thought that finally stabbing her mother
had simply removed the terrible mixture of guilt and disappointment
that that bitch had made her feel. Britannia’s death was
emancipating. Glory was snapped out of self-reflection by her phone
ringing and as she was in such a good mood she answered it without
screening the caller.

“Hello.” Glory
said.

“Hello.” Apollo
said. “Is that the 1812 Overture playing in the background?”

“Yes it is.”
Glory picked out some face wash from the cabinet. “How can I help
you?”

“Well.” Apollo
said. There was a naughty edge to his voice.

“I haven’t got
time for anything like that.” Glory added a giggle in for good
measure.

“You’ve been
invited to tea haven’t you?”

“Yes T-day. It
should be such fun.”

“Sarcasm is the
lowest form of wit.”

“It’s better
than no wit at all.”

“Artemis should
be there as well as my mother. Be nice to them.”

“When am I not
nice?”

“You’re
frequently horrid.” Apollo said. “Don’t you dare hang up on
me.”

“Was that
all?”

Apollo could
hear a new playfulness to her voice that he’d never heard before
which pleased him. “I just wanted to hear you speak.” He said in
earnest.

“You’re getting
rash.”

Apollo sighed
“Ares wants to marry you. He’s going to ask father for permission
tonight. Aphrodite is not coping well at all. She’s been throwing
things at Hephaestus all morning the poor guy.”

Glory could
hear that his mood had shifted darker and the sunlight through the
window got a tad less bright. “Silly Ares.”

“You won’t say
yes will you?” He asked. The tension in his voice was palpable.

“Considering
what you’re about to do?” Glory knew better than to push Apollo’s
buttons but she couldn’t help herself. She wasn’t sure where the
petulance was coming from and she also wasn’t sure it was a good
idea. In truth she had a soft spot for Ares. People go to war for
the glory of it all the time. They made some sort of sense
together. If it really came to it perhaps it wouldn’t be bad to be
married to a god like Ares: he had to be good in bed for Aphrodite
to stick around and he got her weird blood lust/destruction
thing.

“Trust me.
Please just trust me. I love you.” That was the closest to
desperate Glory had ever heard from him. “Please just trust
me.”

“What the…”
Glory said as Apollo put one hand on her mouth to stop her from
screaming and turned the radio up with the other. He took his hand
from her mouth and pulled her tight.

“Please just
trust me. I love you.” Apollo said whispering into her ear.

“What on earth
are you doing? Firstly we can all just pop up in random places in
people’s houses but it is common courtesy to use the front door.
Secondly everyone’s in and thirdly why are you not wearing any
trousers...” Glory was interrupted from finishing her sentence by a
tongue and a wandering hand.

“Please just
trust me. I love you.” Apollo said as they lay down on the bathroom
floor.

“Uh huh.”

“Why didn’t you
tell me that you were naked when I rang.” Apollo said as the
cannons started going off on the radio.

“It hardly
seemed appropriate.”

“We’re going to
have to be quiet.”

***

“You were in
there a while.” Liberty said as she walked past Glory coming out of
the bathroom. Liberty had been busy making cardboard figures for
the scenario planning downstairs and she’d just popped to her room
for some more glitter. She always had a stash at the bottom of her
wardrobe.

“Yeah I treble
conditioned my hair.” Glory said from the doorway to the
bathroom.

“I’ve spoken to
Hera by the way and have got the list of everyone invited. She said
to say thank you to Honour for the bridesmaid spread sheet whatever
that is?” Liberty said as the pair of them moved down the hall.

“We sorted out
all the dresses.”

“Nifty, thanks
guys.”

***

Glory didn’t
know what to wear. All of her dresses for Valhalla were way too
formal and a bit too spangly for afternoon tea. She normally wore
any old thing when she had tea with her mother but that was because
she never cared, whereas now she did care. She cared a lot. She
needed to dress appropriately for the social situation and it was
making her anxious. Glory stood in the mirror and gave herself a
pep talk to remind herself that, although it was Hera’s tea party,
she was the beacon of good taste and whatever she chose to wear
would be the example that everyone should feel inferior against.
Rationally she thought it might be something to do with Apollo’s
mother being there, but she decided to barely acknowledge this
thought. And then she thought sod it, I’ll wear whatever I bloody
want to. She rifled through her wardrobe and pulled out a white
silk shirt with a peter pan collar, a light jumper with a scoop
neckline and a pleated yellow, white and black tartan skirt that
was nipped on the waist and fell elegantly to her mid-calf. Glory
then selected her favourite pair of suede black court shoes and her
weather-beaten leather jacket. To top it off she threw on her
favourite string of pearls. For make-up she put on a dash of
eyeliner and swish of mascara and then a tonne of red lipstick. Her
hair was up in a messy ponytail and she found her favourite pair of
sunglasses that would stop her from making direct eye contact. She
looked like an ironic Sloane ranger and was ready to take on all
the backhanded compliments that Olympus could throw at her. She
sprayed some perfume and looked at the time on her phone, it was
12pm. She dialled Freya’s number.