The Sweetest Gift (The McKaslin Clan: Series 1 Book 2) (12 page)

He wanted to brush the soft hair from her face, the golden strands that shone like the sun and whipped in cadence with the wind. He wanted to use those errant strands as an excuse to run his fingers along the curve of her face, to feel her satin skin, to hold her again, if only for one brief moment.

“I’ve got to go. I wish I had more time. Hey, maybe it’s my turn to cook you dinner?” She snapped her slim fingers and her dog came running.

Sam felt a bubble of panic rise in his chest. He was panicking because he liked the idea. A lot. How wrong was that? “I’ve got a late night at work.”

“Oh, and I have Bible study tonight. What am I thinking?” She tossed him a megawatt smile, the kind that a woman gave a man she really cared about.

“Hey, another time, then.” At least that would give him time to think this through.

“Sure. Have a good day, Sam. Bye, Leo.” She grabbed her spaniel’s leash and headed up the walkway. “See you later.”

“Yeah.”

Sam sank to his bottom porch step and set down the mug before he spilled his coffee. What was this he was feeling for her? It was like nothing he’d ever known before.

He was lonely, that was it. He was getting soft in his old age, now that he was over thirty, and it was hard living alone. He didn’t deny that. But it was better than the alternative.

Kirby would make a loving wife. That thought came out of the blue, as if an angel had whispered in his ear, and it troubled him more.

By the time he’d sipped his way to the bottom of the oversize mug, there she was, backing out of her driveway, looking carefully over her shoulder as she eased out onto the street.

She waved before she put her car in gear and drove away.

Leaving a hole the size of Montana in his chest.

“Okay, we want the scoop.” Michelle pounced on her the instant she set foot inside the coffee shop.

Kirby shrugged out of her coat and hung it on the old-fashioned coat rack by the door.

The coffee shop was closed to regular customers this time of night, but Michelle had been busy, whipping up frothy drinks for the handful of women seated cozily around a table in the corner by the windows. Why was everyone staring at her like that?

“Tell us about this handsome man you’ve been secretly dating.” Alexandra Corey adjusted her three-month-old son in her arms. “A very handsome and rich man, I hear.”

“Sam’s handsome, if you like tall, dark and rugged.” Kirby kept her voice neutral as she slipped into the last empty chair at the table. “But I don’t think he’s rich.”

Everyone broke out in laughter.

“Yeah, sure, he buys an airport. He has two helicopters and a Cessna.” Michelle rolled her eyes. “I think he’s really poor to afford all that. Here’s a vanilla steamer, sister dear. Tell us how long you’ve been dating that eligible bachelor behind our backs? The whole time? Or did he just start asking you out?”

Kirby would have thanked her sister for the coffee, but she was not happy to be embarrassed. “I’m not dating Sam. We’re neighbors. We’re friends.”

“Friends, huh?” Michelle plopped into her chair beside Kirby. “Is he, like, in love with you yet? Do you love him?”

“No!”

“A little defensive, are you, sister dear?”

“Please, let’s remember why we’re gathering tonight.” Kirby reached inside her book bag and laid her Bible and her devotional on the table before her. Why were her hands shaking? Why was she feeling this way?

Because it was true. She loved Sam more than she thought could be possible. All day long she’d felt a longing she’d never known before. The steady burning light inside her remained, unconditional and never ending.

The kind of love she’d always prayed to find, and it was more than she’d ever expected.

“We’re all here, so let’s start.” Kendra, in charge of the group, cracked open her worn Bible. “From Jeremiah. ‘For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.’”

The verse made her think of what Sam had said last night.
Maybe you weren’t there to save them, Kirby. But to comfort them…when they needed comfort most of all.

And last night Sam had comforted her when she’d needed it. He’d held her close when she’d felt so utterly alone. He’d tucked her into bed with the care and respect of the greatest of heroes when she didn’t feel as if she deserved it.

When she looked at him, she saw his strength, his goodness and his great heart.

She felt as if she glowed, from head to toe, from skin to soul, simply thinking of him. She ached with the wish to see him again.

In a few hours, she thought. She’d be home and so would he. The evening was a warm one, with the hint of summer on the breeze. Suddenly she could see her future spread out before her. One of hope. Of goodness.

Of love.

W
ho invented the computer and thought it was a good idea? Sam wanted to know. He resisted the urge to grab the contraption, and the printer, too, and hurl it out the open window.

This computer program is so easy that you’ll be able to do all your bookkeeping yourself,
the CPA had promised.

Easy? What was easy about this? Sam had a degree in physics. He had brazened into hostile territory nap of the earth—so low, they bellied treetops the entire mission. He’d flown birds that were shot at, shot up, on fire, barely working and not working at all.

He’d survived being captured. He’d flown all over the world. He’d handled all that without batting an eye.

But not this frustrating plastic box some people called a computer. The apparatus sat mocking him in his own kitchen.

“What do you mean there’s no printer?” Maybe talking sense to the machine would help. “It’s hooked up right here. See? It’s the right cable. Fits nice and tight. The power is on. So just print. Aghh!”

Leo nudged his nose against Sam’s hand in sympathy. The dog’s chocolate-brown eyes were sorrowful, as if he shared the same opinion about that suspicious computer.

Time to take a break. Maybe the computer would have a change of heart and decide to open up friendly negotiations with the printer. If not, then Sam intended to call the CPA and beg for help.

“Yoo-hoo, is anybody home?” His aunt’s cheerful voice echoed through the house.

The tension drained away, and Sam gladly stormed from the kitchen to yank open the screen door. “Aren’t you a welcome sight? And a lovely one.”

“Oh, you flatterer.” Ruth drew his face down to plant a maternal kiss on his cheek. “Keep those compliments coming. At my age, I’ll take all of them I can get. Goodness, what changes you’ve made in this place!”

“Yep, I just put in the vinyl windows.”

“So I see.” Ruth ran her fingers over the wood frames he’d carefully nailed into their original place. “What a fine job you’ve done. Although with you, I wouldn’t expect anything less. Oh, you’re too thin. You’re losing weight cooking for yourself.”

“I’m the same weight I always am, and I’m a good cook. You know that.”

“I know, but I’ve read time and time again how a man is happier and lives longer if he’s married.”

“Really? I figured marriage would be so stressful for us poor men, it would kill us faster.” He winked.

“Oh, you stop that now!” Laughing, Ruth held out her arms and he braced himself. He knew more doting affection was coming, and he was helpless to stop it.

Best to just give in, don’t struggle. It would be over faster.

“I love you and want what’s best for you, my boy,” she said, her voice wobbly with affection as she wrapped her frail arms around his middle and squeezed him tight.

Ah, it was good to have a family again.

“You’re the closest thing I have to a son, so indulge me. Get married and be happy.”

“I tried that. I wasn’t happy.”

Ruth stepped away, and when she did, sorrow for him shone in her eyes. “I know. It was wrong how Carla treated you. You didn’t deserve that.”

He felt his insides turn steely cold. “I try not to think about that time in my life. You know that.”

“Yes, but I must point out that not every woman is selfish. There are plenty of good women on this planet who have big hearts and love deeply. I was one of them.”

“I know, Ruth. That’s why I think you’re the greatest woman I know. My uncle was lucky to have you.”

“The love I had for my Ned was the sweetest part of my life. I miss him something terrible, but the years we had, my, what a comfort that is. Marriage can be bliss. Believe me, I know. Which reminds me, I heard a rumor about you taking little Kirby McKaslin out on a date.”

“We happened to both wind up at the burger place and shared a table. Did everyone in this town drive by that night and see us? Inviting her to share my table was the polite and gentlemanly thing to do. I was showing off the one good manner I have.”

“Oh, you are impossible!” Ruth lifted her chin, looking as if she’d already made up her mind and no one was going to change it, and marched into the kitchen. “What have you done in here? Oh, my. You bought a computer.”

“You mean a box of torture, frustration and misery?”

“Having a few problems with it, are you? You mean there’s one thing in this world that Sam Gardner can’t do perfectly?” Ruth had the audacity to look delighted as she rubbed her hands together, looking over the computer with glee. “Oh, this is a nice system. Let’s see what your problem is.”

“Wait a minute. You know something about computers?”

“Why, of course. I Internet all the time. There are so many wonderful things! I belong to a book club online, can you imagine? We read inspirational romances and discuss them. Oh, and the Bible resources and, my, those lists. I belong to a rubber-stamping list and a crocheting one, and I could go on and on. Look, I see what your problem is. I’ll just change this setting.”

To Sam’s complete amazement, the printer that had remained stubbornly silent started printing. “You’re a lifesaver.”

“No more than you are, my boy.” Ruth glanced up, and her sharp gaze traveled straight to the window that looked out over the neighboring backyard. “Kirby is home. Isn’t she just a lovely girl?”

Sam prayed for patience. He was going to need it. “Of course she is, but no one is as lovely as you.”

“Stop that, now. Goodness, I’m trying to open your eyes to one of the Lord’s most precious blessings—”

“Pizza? It’s nearly suppertime. I could phone in an order to the local pizza place.”

“Pizza is not a precious blessing.”

“It is if you’re hungry.”

“Oh, how you make me laugh. You’re too much like your uncle, God bless him. My side is starting to hurt.” She waggled her finger at him. “I’m talking about love. You’ve been alone a long time. Maybe you ought to let go of the past. Maybe what’s ahead of you, if you are man enough to risk it, will be the best part of your life. You never know.”

“All right, I hear you. I’ve listened. Now, can we change the subject? Why did you stop by, anyway?”

“I just got lonely for you and wanted to see for myself if this house is going to suit you. There’s more damage here than you told me about—”

“Yes, but don’t you worry about it. Since I’m not ever going to marry, I have a lot of time on my hands. I like to work with tools. Saws. Drills. Hammers. It completes me as a man.”

Ruth held her stomach as she howled. Good, he liked making her laugh. She’d been sad for a long time after Ned’s death. “Fine. Do you know how to run this computer? Or do you need someone to show you?”

“What will it cost me?”

Ruth set her big black handbag on the table and pulled up a chair. She didn’t look altruistic at all as she named her price. “I want to see a wedding ring on your hand by summer’s end.”

“No deal. The offer of a pizza still stands.”

“Then I’ll take it, but I’m not giving up hope for you, my boy.” She patted his hand, a lifetime of love, of family ties, strong between them.

The keyboard tapped as Ruth worked, and Sam tried to pay attention. He really did. He wanted to figure out the computer so he didn’t have to rely on anyone.

He was a loner. A survivor. A strong man who didn’t need love.

So why did his gaze drift to the window? Why did his attention turn from the monitor’s bright screen to the woman next door? Why did his chest squeeze and his soul fill with peace? Why did longing move through him at the sight of her? At the sight of her graceful, gentle beauty. At the memory of having her in his arms, so sweet and soft and lovely.

Why was it, when he looked at her, he felt whole? As if the past wounds no longer hurt. As if Carla and her memory no longer mattered.

He could almost imagine it. Kirby turning toward him with real love in her eyes, reaching out to him, the man she loved honest and true. She could light up his life, like dawn to the world.

Did he have enough heart left to love her in return? The pit in the center of his chest was cold. Hard. Broken.

What was he doing? He had no business letting the wish into his heart. The wish for her.

Unaware he was watching from the window, Kirby flicked a long shank of her wavy hair behind her shoulder and pulled something from her pocket. A plastic pink ball. She held it up for her dog to see and then tossed it. The ball sailed through the air, the spaniel barked happily in pursuit and Kirby clapped her hands, cheering on her beloved dog as the cocker retrieved the ball and ran back to her mistress.

Kirby knelt, praising the animal gently, and brushed her fingertips across the dog’s soft curls. So loving and gentle. What a good wife she would make, he realized. What a wonderful mom.

She deserved so much. What she didn’t need was someone who was cynical and wounded and used up. A man who was tarnished by life. Who would always be.

Kirby deserved a man with a whole heart to give her. A man who believed there was love on this earth strong enough to last.

And if it made him sad, made him feel as if the bottom had just dropped out of his world, well, then, that was just the way it was. He was a realist. He was tough. He was strong enough to make the right decisions.

“How about that pizza, Ruth? You like double pepperoni and sausage, right?”

“You’d better make it a large. I’m hungry.” Hope twinkled in her eyes.

Sam groaned. He knew, beyond a doubt, that she’d seen his heart on his face. Saw his tender feelings for Kirby McKaslin that he refused to name.

Refused to feel.

Was it her imagination or was Sam busier than he’d been for weeks? Kirby wondered as she rinsed vegetables in her sink. She spotted Leo racing around in the backyard, sniffing the air, checking for invaders or for squirrels that were hiding in the trees.

But no sign of Sam.

She’d hoped to catch up to him this evening. She’d kept an eye out for him, thinking he might step out onto his back deck to barbecue his supper. But it didn’t look as though he was anywhere near. His windows were closed up tight. His truck wasn’t in the driveway.

She’d held off fixing her own meal in the hopes that Sam would come home. Her stomach growled.

“That’s what I get for waiting.” For wanting. She turned the lettuce upside down to drain, left the carrot and tomato in the drainer and plugged in her grilling machine. She didn’t feel like making a fuss over lighting up the barbecue. She’d be making a meal for one, like always.

But maybe not forever.

She grabbed the spatula and lifted the beef patty onto the grill. She seasoned the beef, lowered the grill’s lid and washed her hands in the sink. And because the window just happened to be in front of her, she looked through it and noticed Sam still wasn’t home.

She missed him. An entire day and a half had gone by and she hadn’t seen him. She longed for him. Remembered the way he’d kissed her tenderly. She felt thrilled and alive, as if everything was right in the world. As if nothing would ever be wrong again.

The phone rang. Was it Sam? She still had time to throw another patty on the grill. Hope uplifted her as she snatched the cordless from the table and glanced at the caller ID.

Not Sam, but Kendra. Kirby tamped down her disappointment, because it was always good to hear from her sister. “Howdy, stranger.”

“I’ve been thinking about you, so I thought I’d give you a call.” Kendra was a year older than Kirby, and they had always been close. “You left right after Bible study last night. I didn’t get the chance to talk to you. Nobody did.”

“I know. I had to head home and take care of my dog.”

“Sure. If I were Michelle, I’d say that you were rushing home to spend time with that new neighbor of yours.”

Kirby groaned. “No, I don’t want to talk about it—”

“But I’m not Michelle, so I understand. Just take your time, okay, sis? Falling in love means trusting someone. It’s good to know he’s worth that level of trust.”

“Sam is a good man. I know it.”

“Then you do care for him?”

“Yes.” More than care. It was frightening, because it was so powerful. Nothing had ever felt so right. As if all the pieces of her life suddenly fit.

While she toasted the hamburger bun in the oven and removed the meat from the grill she asked how her sister’s land purchase was progressing. By the time her sister had finished answering, Kirby had her hamburger made and was making up a small bowl of salad.

“Will I see you on Friday, or will you have a big date?” Kendra asked.

“I’ll let you know right after I know.” Kirby swept the last of the tomato from the cutting board into the bowl. “Otherwise, we’re on for Friday night.”

“Great. I love being your backup.” Teasing, Kendra said goodbye and hung up.

Jessie barked the exact minute a knock rattled the glass window on her back door.

Sam.
Kirby came alive at the sight of him. Every sense, every feeling inside her focused solely on him. Happiness made her feel weightless as she floated to the door. Leo pushed his way in, greeted the little spaniel and headed straight for her counter and her dog biscuits.

“Leo! Don’t you dare,” Sam ordered and glowered at his dog.

The big rottweiler sighed, gazed longingly at the treats, then at the hamburger sitting on the edge of the island.

“Don’t even think about it. Come here. Lie down.” Sam winked at Kirby, keeping a stern face for his errant dog. He waited while Leo ambled outside and lay down on the deck. The cocker joined him, snuggling up to him companionably in the late-evening sunshine. “Good dogs.”

Kirby loved everything about this man. His sense of humor, the way he treated his dog. The fact that seeing him was more thrilling than if someone handed her a million dollars cash. She loved the way his hard mouth softened in the corners and crooked upward when he started to grin.

Except he wasn’t grinning. He looked tense, instead of relaxed. Pensive, instead of glad to see her. He glanced nervously at her prepared meal.

“Maybe I’d better come back. After you’ve had a chance to have your dinner.”

“Why don’t you come in anyway?” Whatever was wrong, maybe he wanted to talk about it. Maybe she could help him. After all, their relationship was deepening. She headed toward the refrigerator. “I bought the kind of root beer you like. Want one?”