The Season: Rush (Austin Arrows #1) (33 page)

Kingston

Touching Ellie is the only thing I can focus on. That and the feel of her lips on mine, the soft moans escaping her as she works the buttons loose on my shirt as I take over freeing my dick from my pants.

Everything that has taken place in the last half hour has my mind racing with thoughts I’m sure I shouldn’t be thinking. I can’t deny that I’m scared. Terrified actually. No one knows how this will play out once Ellie does talk to this James guy. If he really is Bianca’s father like he says … where the fuck will that leave us?

Fuck. I don’t even want to think about that, about how all of this might already be falling apart...

“Take the dress off,” I mumble against her mouth, needing to see her.

As I lift my hips to push down my slacks, Ellie sits up and quickly pulls the slinky material over her head, tossing it to the floor behind her. I’m momentarily mesmerized by the silky turquoise bra beneath and the matching thong. I don’t move for what feels like forever, drinking her in with my eyes. In fact, I’m so caught up in looking at her that it takes me a second to realize she has pulled her panties to the side and she’s grinding her slick pussy against my dick.

“Fuck.” She feels so good. So wet, so smooth, so hot.

“I want to feel you inside me,” she whispers as she brings her mouth back to mine.

I reach for my wallet to retrieve a condom, but Ellie stops my hand before I can get it.

Her eyes meet mine and they’re serious. “I want to feel
all
of you.”

I swallow hard as her words register. “Are you sure?”

Her smile is slow and sweet. “I’m on the pill.”

There’s a level of trust between us that takes care of the other concerns, so I don’t feel it necessary to announce that I’m clean or question whether she is. I know this woman and she knows me.

Goddamn. Ellie Kaufman is going to be the death of me.

Without taking a breath, I reach for my cock and guide it to her entrance, my eyes still locked with hers. And when she sinks down on me, the warmth of her pussy sheaths my cock, causing the air to rush from my lungs. I’m assaulted by the pleasure of her smooth walls gripping me, her soft hands gliding over my chest as she takes me inside her body.

“Fuck, baby.” I reach for her head, pulling her mouth to mine and crushing our lips together.

Ellie starts moving her hips, rocking back and forth on my dick, and I groan low in my chest.

Somehow I manage to release her when she sits up. Her eyes are bright and clear as she stares back at me. I reach for her hips, never looking away from her. I want to see every emotion on her face. I want to know what she’s feeling, and the best way to do that is to read her expressions.

“Oh, God, Kingston… So good.”

I lift her hips, then lower her down on me again. Up, down. Up, down. I’m blinded by the intensity. The heat of her cunt, the desperation in her moans. She needs more, as do I, but this is pure fucking bliss and I never want it to end.

I try my best not to think about what happens after this. What tomorrow might bring. What damage might be done to our relationship if Bianca’s dad comes back in the picture. None of that should matter right now. The only thing I should be focused on is the heaven of her body.

“Make love to me, Kingston.”

Something tightens in my chest. Perhaps it’s the culmination of all the powerful emotions I feel for this woman. Whatever it is, I’m lost to it. Lost to her.

I pull myself back to the moment and focus on the slow grind of our bodies. I want to tell Ellie that I could spend the rest of my life right here, but I keep that to myself. Although I sense she might feel the same, I don’t know that for a fact.

Again, I don’t know what tomorrow might bring.

Her inner muscles tighten around my dick, drawing a loud growl from me. “Oh, yeah.” I focus on her face. “Just like that, Ellie. Milk my dick, baby.”

Ellie’s eyes close briefly, but then they open again, still fixed on my face.

“You’re so goddamn beautiful,” I whisper. “Ride my dick, baby. Take everything you need.”

She takes over, lifting and lowering, moaning as she does. While she seductively rolls her hips, I circle her clit with my thumb, applying just enough pressure to make her moan louder. Her pace is still slow. Too slow. I need more and I know she does, too.

Wrapping my arms around her, I pull her down to me once again as I buck my hips upward, driving deep inside her. I love her soft moans, the sharp inhales, the sweet taste of her tongue on mine.

“Oh, yes. Kingston … more…”

I give her more, holding her tight to me as I fuck her from underneath. Within seconds, I’m driving us both higher and higher. I know I won’t last. Without the barrier of the condom, the sensation is intense. I’m quickly losing it and I know I can’t stop until she comes, but I’m getting dangerously close.

Pressing my lips close to her ear, I lower my voice and mumble all the dirty things I can think of, knowing how much she enjoys that. “Such a sweet, tight pussy, Ell. I love the way you feel. Love the way your pussy grips my dick. I love…”
you
. I can’t tell her that part, but I desperately want to.

Another loud moan escapes her, and her fingernails dig into my shoulders as she holds on.

“I want you to come on my dick, Ellie. Then I want to come deep inside you.”

“Oh, God! Kingston!”

I feel her pussy tighten. She’s so close and she’s taking me with her. I quicken my thrusts, driving in deep as I tighten my grip around her. I never want to let this woman go.

“Come for me, Ellie,” I whisper, my words rough with emotion I hope she doesn’t notice.

“Yes… yes…”

I focus on how fucking good she feels against me, around me. I’m consumed by her in every imaginable way, and I know right then and there that this isn’t just sex. Maybe for her, but not for me.

Hell, it never was really about sex for me. Not with Ellie.

“I’m… Oh, God, Kingston… I’m coming.”

Ellie’s body locks around me, her muscles tense as she shudders, her orgasm detonating.

“Fuck, baby.”

I close my eyes and give myself over to my release, following right behind her.

Ellie

When you’ve spent the majority of your adult life without intimate contact with a man, you would think it would take some getting used to. I don’t seem to be having a problem with it, though. At least not with Kingston. I have never had an overnight guest in my bed until him. Yet the way his arms wrap possessively around me is something I’ve never felt before, something I’ve never even longed for before. I guess I never thought I would enjoy it so much, but I do.

I definitely do.

After we quickly cleaned up in the living room, I grabbed a bottle of water for us to share, and we moved into my bedroom, where I once again found myself taking advantage of this man. I guess you can’t really call it taking advantage since he was on board with making love again, but still. I can’t keep my hands off him. Not only because he’s a wonderful distraction, either. Having him here makes me feel safe, comfortable. As though I have someone there for me, I guess you could say.

“What are you thinking about?” His rough baritone sounds from behind me, his breath warm against my ear.

“You.” I figure I might as well be honest here. I long ago passed the point of no return with this man. I figure if we’re going to keep moving forward, he needs to know how I feel.

“Yeah?”

I nod, snuggling into him.

“I like that you are,” he whispers and I notice a slight catch in his words.

For the last few hours, I’ve managed to push the thought of James out of my mind. Thankfully that phone call didn’t completely ruin my night, but I know I have to deal with it sooner or later. I have to figure out what James wants, what Bianca wants. I even have to figure out what I want. I won’t know any of that until I actually sit down and have a conversation with James. And my daughter.
Our
daughter. I’m not sure how Kingston will feel when all of this plays out, but I’m grateful that he’s here with me now.

At some point in the last couple of months, I’ve managed to fall for this man. Deeper than I ever imagined possible. I know that I’m not supposed to, and I should probably keep those feelings to myself, but it’s true. I have to accept it, even though I don’t have a clue what to do about it.

“Ellie?”

“Hmm?”

“What are you going to do about James?”

I sigh. I wonder if he can read my mind. “I don’t know yet.”

The man deserves to know his daughter if that’s what he wants. If I take the time to think about it now, though, I’ll probably cry. I’m not sure how I feel about Bianca going behind my back to find him. Sure, she has that right. He is her father, after all. But it is my place to protect her, and I have no idea what this man may or may not want out of this.

I need to talk to my brother, too. I have to weigh the very real possibility that James might fight me for Bianca. He may accuse me of trying to keep her from him, although that is certainly not true. If he has money—I don’t know the first thing about him—he could make this really difficult for me.

And then, of course, there’s the emotional aspect. If this really is my one-night stand from Las Vegas as he claims he is, then he is her father. It’s inevitable at this point that they will meet, and I can’t predict how that will play out, either.

“When you do know, will you share it with me?”

Something in Kingston’s tone worries me. I manage to turn over to face him, remaining in the cocoon of his arms. The room is dark, so I can’t see his face, but this feels more intimate.

“What do you want me to do?” I ask. I want his opinion. I want to know how he feels about all of this. I’m not sure why I do, but I do. I know he doesn’t think this is any of his business, but it is. If for no other reason than he’s my friend. For some reason, it matters to me what he thinks.

I get that the sex between us is off the charts. However, I have to keep reminding myself that this is an arrangement. Kingston has never made me any promises. I shouldn’t expect more from him than he’s willing to give. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that because this thing between us… It doesn’t feel pretend to me.

“It’s not up to me,” he says, his words soft. “Just … keep me in the loop.”

The way he says it seems so … distant. As though he’s on the outside looking in and whatever decision I make won’t affect him.

Not sure what else to say, I tell him that I will.

“And if you decide we need to end this … arrangement … let me know. I’ll talk to Amber or Phoenix or whoever and figure out another way to deal with…”

He doesn’t need to complete that sentence. Hell, he doesn’t need to say another word. A crack starts in my chest, and it fractures all the way through my heart. The pain… It takes my breath away. Why I thought he might want more from me, I’m not sure. Apparently I did think that, though. I thought we’d established something between us, but from his words, it seems awfully one-sided.

I want to ask him if he still sees this as an arrangement, but I don’t. I’m not sure I can handle the brutal honesty. If he felt something more for me, he wouldn’t have said it like that.

Suddenly, his arms no longer feel comforting. I feel like I’m suffocating, so I force myself to turn back over, away from him.

It’s a damn good thing I didn’t tell him how I really feel.

Having my heart handed back to me isn’t something I want to deal with right now.

Or hell, ever.

42

Ellie

Saturday, December 10
th

“That’s all he said,” Noelle repeats for probably the tenth time since we sat down at this table.

“How do you even know this is really her father?” Spencer counters, not once looking at Noelle when he speaks.

I called my brother and asked him to meet me at the Penalty Box so I could share this information with him. I wasn’t sure if Kingston was going to run off and do that, and I definitely didn’t want Spencer to hear it from someone else first. My brother has always been there for me, and I know he’d be hurt if I didn’t tell him what happened as soon as it happened.

When he walked into the restaurant, it took everything in my power not to run into his arms and let him hug me and tell me that everything would be okay. Only, if he had, it would’ve been a lie, because even if he could fix the big issue here, he couldn’t fix
all
my issues.

“We don’t know that,” Noelle states more firmly.

She also isn’t looking at Spencer.

Quite frankly, it’s a little awkward sitting here with these two while they pretend I’m the only one at the table with them. I’m not sure what’s going on with them, but … I wish they’d figure it out and quick. When I was looking at the Facebook post that Noelle found for me—apparently Bianca blocked everyone except for the bar’s Facebook page—I could sense them sitting there, ignoring one another. It was weird then and it’s still weird now.

“So, why didn’t you know that Bianca was posting this?” Spencer asks.

I glare at my brother. I can hear the insinuation in his tone. He might not out-and-out say he thinks I’ve done something wrong, but his tone says everything for him.

“Well, for one, she didn’t tell me. And two, gosh, I don’t know, Spencer… She. Didn’t. Tell. Me.” I say the last part with all the frustration that has built inside me since the second I opened my eyes this morning.

“Not to mention, she created a fake account,” Noelle adds. “Clearly she knew what she was doing. She didn’t want you to find out and since you
diligently monitor her social media accounts
”—Noelle tone drips with sarcasm, obviously for Spencer’s benefit—“she knew she had to do something or you’d find out.”

I watch Spencer. I can’t tell what he’s thinking.

“But it doesn’t matter,” Noelle continues. “What’s done is done. And now he did find you and he left his phone number. He said to have you call him as soon as possible.”

“And then what?” Spencer inquires, his hazel eyes pinned on me.

I shrug. I really don’t know what’s going to happen next. “I need to call him, I guess. I’ve got to confirm he is who he says he is. Then, if that goes well, I’ll meet with him.”

That’s the most troubling part. The not knowing what he’s going to want out of this.

“I want to be there when you do.”

I glare at my brother. “That’s not gonna happen.” Sure, I love my brother, but talk about making a bad situation worse. I can picture Spencer punching James in the face, angry at the man who knocked his sister up and left her to raise the kid on her own.

Only James didn’t know about Bianca. It really wasn’t his fault.

Spencer leans forward and puts his arm on the table. “I don’t like the idea of you meeting this guy by yourself.”

“It’s not like I’m gonna meet him at a hotel room.”

“No?” His eyes drop to the table and he mumbles, “Wouldn’t be the first time.”

I feel like someone punched me in the stomach. I can’t believe my brother said that. I stare at him, hoping the tears I feel forming don’t get a chance to fall. I don’t want him to see how much he hurt me.

“What the fuck is your problem?” Noelle hisses, her attention turning to him for the first time in the past half hour. “Why the hell would you say something like that?”

Spencer still doesn’t look at her, and I wish I knew what was going on with them. Clearly something happened. Something bad if their attitudes are anything to go by.

The door opens and I look up in time to see Kingston walking in. His gaze immediately slides my way. He watches me for a minute, but instead of joining us, he walks right to the bar and orders an iced tea.

My brother slaps the table and gets to his feet. “When you figure this out, let me know. Don’t you dare go meet him without telling me when and where. Someone has to watch out for you.”

I don’t bother to argue. He’s not going to listen to me anyway.

“Why didn’t Kingston come over here?” Noelle asks, pivoting in her seat to glance over at the bar.

“Don’t know.” I kind of do know, but I’m not in the mood to talk about it. When I woke up this morning, Kingston was gone. Not only was he gone from my bed, he was gone from my house. He didn’t leave a note, didn’t send a text. Just vanished.

If I share that news with Noelle right now, I might lose the fragile grip I have on my sanity. It’s possible I might have whiplash from how quickly everything changed. One second, we’re on a date, then next, he’s putting this wall between us. All because of a phone call I haven’t even bothered to make yet.

“Well, if you want me to come with you when you meet with James, I will.”

“I need to call him,” I tell her. “Until I do that, I don’t know what’s gonna happen.”

“Just let me know, sweetie. I’ve got your back.”

At least someone does.

My eyes instantly move across the room to lock on Kingston once again. He’s not looking at me, which only makes my heart hurt more. I push it away, refusing to acknowledge it. Right now, I have more than enough to deal with, and if Kingston wants to ignore me, that’s his business.

No. Wait. I’m not letting him simply turn his back and walk away. There are a lot of things that
aren’t
being said between us, but there’s one thing that
has
to be said.

And if that pisses him off … well, I’m sorry.