The Saver (15 page)

He was all worried when he heard I was in a mess. He probably thought I was involved in drugs or something. I think he was relieved when I explained the whole story of Mrs. Coleville and David and how I have to quit one of my jobs.

Jack was impressed by all the jobs. He said, “You're a
jewel. I always knew it and your mom always knew it.”

That got me crying again. He said, “I guess you miss her a lot.”

I couldn't take no one knowing the truth, so I told him how mean I was to her. As if it wasn't bad enough that she was stuck with a fat ugly kid everyone hated, I began being a total bitch to her, just like everyone else.

Jack said, “Felicity was proud of you. She told me you were funny and smart and that you looked after everything.”

I was suspicious of that. I asked when she told him.

He said she called him on his birthday, and he called her on hers, even when he was in Rockwood. He said she called when I was in school, because she was shy about talking when another person was listening.

Well, that's true. Mom even hated talking to me when anyone else could hear her, which is why she hardly said a word when we went to the IGA or Value Village. The worst thing for her was if the cashier asked her something, and there were other people standing in line. I answered for her half the time.

I told Jack that the last thing I said to her was “Leave me alone, you stupid cow.” That's what I said, Xanoth. I said “Leave me alone, you stupid cow.” Even though she was only reminding me to take my bus pass.

So Jack took my hand in this really sappy way and said, “Fern, we have to forgive ourselves. We all make mistakes and we all get angry.”

I said, “Mom never got angry.”

He said, “Well, some people turn anger into sadness. It's explained here in this book I'm reading. Do you want some cheese danishes?”

I was exhausted, but I didn't want to go to sleep so I said OK. Jack took out the danishes and put them on a plate, and while we were eating he said, “Felicity knew you were in a bad mood because of your personal hardship. She said you took over the cleaning when she was sick and you looked after her when she had her migraines. She wouldn't want you to feel bad now. Her spirit wants you to be restful.”

I didn't want to hurt his feelings, so I didn't say what I thought, which is that he can't know how she felt when she was alive, and there's no such thing as life after death.

Then he said, “Now about your job problem. Let's see if we can find a way out. Maybe I can take one of your jobs.”

“You mean like doing the janitor work?”

Jack shook his head. He said David hired me, not him, and he might not like him. But he said he could try taking one of the other jobs, if they'd agree to hire him. He said we could “pool our resources.”

He was right about David. David might even do a search and find out that Jack was in prison. That would for sure be the end of the job for both of us.

Well, Jack can't replace me at the restaurant, because that's where I get my main meal of the day. Also, it's because they know me that they give me extra food to take home.

But he could probably replace me at the hotel during
the week. I don't think Karl would mind, as long as Jack does a good job. And I could still do weekends.

Of course I have no idea if I can count on Jack. He might start drinking again, or he might vanish, or he might not be good at making beds. Or he could die of a heart attack, like Mom.

I asked him what about his plans, but he said, “My plan was to find a job and a place to stay. And here they've both landed at my feet. The right spirit shows you the right path.”

I said, “If you don't mind living in one room.”

He said, “This apartment has everything I could possibly need. A roof over my head, a shower, a kitchen, and your beautiful company.”

I can't remember everything we talked about. He said I gave Mom someone to love and look after, which is the most important thing in life. We were up until almost five.

Basically this might be a solution, unless David decides that Jack can't stay here. If it works, Beauty won't have to be alone when Victor's at the club.

On the other hand, what about the bank deposits? I can't ask Jack to give me his salary. Maybe he'll agree to deposit what he makes into the account, and he can have his part back when I take it all out. Jack's the type to agree to anything.

Yours forever,

Fern

Thursday

March 27

Hi Xanoth,

I found out some things about my father today. Ted.

First, he didn't know Mom was pregnant when he left the farm. He left because the evil people fired him. And the reason they fired him was that he was nice to Mom and tried to defend her.

He liked to travel, and his plan was to go right around the globe. Jack said he was very athletic and he read a lot of science fiction and he liked to draw. He'd sit in a corner after supper with a sketch pad, and draw the imaginary things he read about.

Jack said if he'd known Mom was pregnant, for sure he would have come back, but no one had an address for him.

I'm glad about one thing. He didn't run away from Mom. He didn't leave her because of me.

Yours forever,

Fern

Friday

March 28

Hi Xanoth,

Today Jack came with me to the hotel so I could introduce him to Karl and ask if he could replace me.

On the way to the hotel, I suddenly got into a huge panic again. We were on the metro and I started thinking, who is this person sitting next to me? He was supposed to be my uncle, and he was going to move in with me, but he was a total stranger. A stranger who keeps talking about the right path. I sort of felt sick. It wasn't as bad as when I heard Mom was in the hospital, but it was the same type of feeling.

Then, as soon as we walked up to the hotel, a cross-dresser who knows me came out and blew me a kiss and said, “Fern! How are you, sweetheart?”

I could tell Jack was shocked. I forgot to tell him it's a gay hotel, and I realized that the whole concept was going to weird him out. Because I'm from Montreal, but Jack's from a small town. And you forget when you're used to something that it's not the same for everyone. Now it was Jack who was scared about walking into a new reality.

I said, “I forgot to mention that it's the gay village here, so most of the guests are gay. But it's not a brothel.” I never thought I'd hear myself repeating Karl's line. “It's a real hotel and I get a payslip with deductions and everything.”

Jack said, “People have to find their own path,” but he sounded nervous.

Luckily Étienne was his usual hyper self. He said, “My, my, my, my, who have we here?”

Jack shook Étienne's hand and said, “Pleased to meet you.” His voice was a bit trembly and I realized that he was anxious about being interviewed and meeting new people.

Karl was already upstairs hunting for tips. Étienne went up to get him and I asked Jack if he wanted coffee, but he said he was fine.

Karl came down and I introduced Jack and asked if we could talk for a minute. Karl said sure and we went into his office. He made himself a cup of coffee and Jack changed his mind and had one too. Poor Jack, his hand was shaking when he lifted the mug.

Karl sank down in his chair on the other side of the messy desk and said, “Just don't tell me you're quitting. It hasn't been a good day so far.”

I said, “We were just wondering if my uncle Jack could replace me Tuesdays to Fridays for a while. He'll be great.”

Karl didn't even interview Jack. He only asked if the payslips should be made out to me or to Jack!

I showed Jack how to do a room. Then I took him down to the laundry to meet Sally. She was furious of course. She doesn't like anything changing. When we were back upstairs I told Jack not to take it personally. I forgot who I was talking to. “She has her own path to find,” Jack said.

At 4:30 I left for the restaurant and Jack stayed on to help Sally fold sheets. When I got home from the restaurant he told me he went out for coffee with her! Wild. He asked her and she agreed. I hope she wasn't too mean to him. Probably no one's asked Sally out in a hundred years and she controlled herself out of shock.

So it looks like it might work out, Xanoth, at least for now. The salary slips are still going to be made out to me, by the way. It saves Sally work, and Jack says the money is in exchange for rent.

Yours forever,

Fern

Friday

April 4

Hi Xanoth,

Things are going OK.

Jack likes working at the hotel and Karl seems happy. On the home front, Jack replaced Mrs. Coleville's bathroom mirror and the cracked linoleum, so with a bit of luck she won't complain about him to David, and David won't complain about the expense or about Jack living in the apartment. Jack says this is Canada and I'm allowed to have whoever I want in my apartment, even if I'm a janitor.

The leftovers from the restaurant should cover most of Jack's food, and he also brought $200 with him. He doesn't really eat much. And Karl told him he's planning to paint the whole hotel, and he's going to hire Jack to do it.

Every time Jack takes something from me he says, “I'll accept the good that's offered to me.” So he's Mr. Mush, who cares.

I have more time now, so I took a bus down to my old library and took out a big stack of mysteries. I don't like
all mysteries. I don't like if they're random. The detective's in love, she isn't in love. The corpse is mutilated, it isn't mutilated. Totally random. Also I need the characters to be smarter than me. Or if they're not smart, they have to be interesting at least. Mostly I take out books that are set in London or Edinburgh or one of those places. I've had better luck with those.

It turns out Jack's the one who gave Mom her moon necklace. I told him she never took it off. He started going on about the moon and its power but I tuned out a bit for that part. I'm not that interested in the power of the moon.

Yours forever,

Fern

Sunday

April 6

Hi Xanoth,

Linden left a message for me on the phone. Something like, “Hi Fern, it's Linden, we were wondering if you could come over for dinner, it's just me and my sisters, my parents are out of town so call me.” And she gave me her cell.

I didn't want to go, but Jack said I should. My side: it's pointless, I'm jealous, she's only asking me out of pity, we have nothing in common, the whole thing is random, I don't want to meet her sisters, especially Debbie who left me all those instructions on how to clean the house. I didn't tell Jack all that. I just said it was pointless.

His side: when people reach out to us we have to respond, and there are opportunities and we have to take them, and Linden wouldn't call if she didn't want me to come.

So finally I said I'll go if he comes with me. Why shouldn't he get to eat a great meal in a big house? And if anything goes wrong, at least I won't be on my own.

He said I had to ask Linden because she didn't invite
him, and maybe she didn't want an old guy tagging along, especially when it's all girls getting together.

I called Linden and left a message saying the only time I could come was Monday night and my uncle was staying with me so I thought I'd bring him too and I'll wait to hear from her.

She called me back about an hour later. She said of course it's OK if I bring Jack, and any time Monday was good.

I'm suddenly remembering that Linden's mother gave Mom a copy of
Fifty Ways to Make More Money
. Is that insane or what.

I can't remember what happened to that book. I may have donated it to the trash can.

Yours forever,

Fern

Monday

April 7

Hi Xanoth,

Dinner at Linden's was strange.

We got there at exactly 5:00. I told Jack that Linden was rich, but he didn't realize how rich until he saw the house. He probably only ever saw the inside of a house like that on TV.

Linden opened the door looking as raggedy as ever. She said, “Hi guys, come in, yeah, you know the drill, shoes off or my mother will know through telepathy all the way from Italy. Cool hair.” She meant Jack.

We took off our coats and followed her to the kitchen. She said, “Alice is upstairs locked in her room. Debbie's rehearsing with her band but she should be home soon. Sorry about that manic note she left you, Fern. She's obsessive. She can't help it.”

She meant the note about how to clean the house. I was surprised that Linden remembered that note and knew how annoying it was.

She told Jack she was sorry about Felicity and how they all liked her. Jack said, “She mentioned your generosity,”
but Linden didn't seem to hear him. She was really hyper. She poured us this mango-strawberry juice and she brought a bottle of vodka to the table and asked if we wanted her to add it to the juice. Jack got all excited and said, “No, no, I'm finished with that forever.” She sat down finally and filled her glass with juice and vodka.

Then her sister came down, Alice. She's 13. She has really curly black hair and she's kind of intense. Linden introduced her and said Alice was into animal rights. Then she said, “Non-human animals, that is. Sorry.” I couldn't tell if she was making fun of Alice.

They started talking about whether to wait for Debbie. Linden said the band she's in was rehearsing for a talent show. The band's called A Singer Must Die. I like that name, for a band. Debbie does vocals and plays viola, which is like a big violin. I remember that from a mystery I once read,
Murder After Bach
.

Linden started listing a million things she could either defrost or take out of the fridge – salads, all kinds of pasta, Indian food, different kinds of pizza, and I forget what else.

Jack said anything was fine with him. I said pretty much the same thing. Since it was still early, Linden said we should wait for Debbie, so we followed her to the TV room and sat down on the sofas there.