Authors: Susan X Meagher
The line began to move, but Hennessy didn’t give up her possessive hold. The pair had enough awareness to shuffle toward the gate, and when they reached the attendant the blonde blindly thrust her ticket in the general direction of the nonplussed man. Then she put her hands on Hennessy’s cheeks, held her still as she stared into her eyes for just a second, and gave her a scorcher.
Stumbling slightly as they broke apart, Hennessy stepped away and waved weakly, her hand barely moving. Then she managed to tumble into a plastic seat and sat, staring blankly at the door to the Jetway.
Townsend was nearly as breathless as Hennessy, but she forced herself to summon her courage, walk over and drop down next to her. “That lesbian identity seems to be working out pretty well for you.”
Every emotion at her disposal flashed across Hennessy’s face, but the one that struck Townsend was shame. Deep, face-flushing shame. While letting out a whimper, she dropped her head into her hands, mumbling, “Oh, fuck, that’s not how I wanted you to find out.”
“I’d guess not.” Months of therapy had begun to school Townsend in how to manage her emotions. She hadn’t reined them in perfectly, but she was now able to take a punch to the gut and not completely lose her shit. Instead of giving into her momentary urge to slug her, she slipped her arm around Hennessy’s back and said, “Can I have a hug? I’ve missed you so much.”
Lifting her head to give one of her dazzling smiles, Hennessy shifted in her seat and wrapped her arms around Townsend, murmuring into her ear, “I didn’t know it was possible to miss someone as much as I did you. I swear I thought about you every single day.”
For a tenth of a second she let herself be enveloped in the sensation of Hennessy’s body, warm, welcoming, and tender. But as she drew in a breath, the scent of perfume reached her.
Hennessy didn’t wear perfume.
Townsend’s body shook as she pulled away, her control over her feelings already shaky. “You didn’t spend all of your time thinking about me. Unless you met the pretty blonde on the plane.”
Hennessy’s skin was much paler than normal, showing her embarrassment more vividly than it used to. “No, of course not.” Her eyes hadn’t yet fully landed on Townsend, and now they anxiously scanned the corridor. “I’d kill for a decent cup of tea. I didn’t sleep a wink on the plane, and I’m fried.”
Townsend stood and offered a hand, then pulled Hennessy to her feet. “Come on. We can get you a little caffeine before you spill your guts.”
While draping her arm around Townsend’s shoulders, Hennessy dragged her bag behind her, letting it slide across the terrazzo floor. “A lot of caffeine would be a better idea. I’m running on empty.”
“A lot of caffeine it is,” Townsend said. She reached across Hennessy’s body and took the bag from her loose grip. “I know you’re tired when you don’t take care of your things.”
“Tired,” she sighed, her voice faint. “That’s the word. Tired.”
Hennessy looked up with a half smile when Townsend placed a cup of tea in front of her.
The instinct to touch her, to be as unconsciously intimate as they’d just started to be before that fatal trip to the Vineyard two years earlier, was overpowering. Townsend’s hand went to Hennessy’s head and gently stroked her tangled hair. “Before you start, I have a question. Do you have to get home today? Camp doesn’t start for a while, does it?”
“No, I guess I don’t have to. Ideally, I’d go home tomorrow, the day the shack’s closed.” A wan smile formed on her lips as she looked up and met Townsend’s gaze. “Although I truly do love hitchhiking, having grandaddy pick me up makes life a little easier.”
A flash of memory settled upon Townsend’s shoulders. It seemed so very, very long ago that they’d first visited Beaufort…shared their first kiss…promised to love each other forever…. Where had those love-struck girls gone? She sighed as she moved to claim the chair opposite Hennessy. “You know, I haven’t asked much of you in the last year, mostly because we weren’t speaking,” she said with a small smile, showing she held no animosity in her heart, “but I’m asking for something now. Stay here in New York with me until tomorrow.”
Blue eyes widened, making her look truly perplexed. “Uhm…how?”
“I’ll get us a hotel room. Come on. I need to know what’s going on with you, and this might be my only chance.”
Hennessy nodded. “I’ll call my grandparents and tell them my plans have changed. Let’s go.”
Townsend put her hand on her elbow and led the way. Hennessy hadn’t complained about allowing her to pay for a hotel room…hadn’t even seemed to consider the fee the airline would charge her to modify her reservation. France had clearly changed her.
Both women were quiet during the cab ride, but Townsend was an anxious wreck, fixated on learning who the mystery woman was and what she meant to Hennessy. But Hennessy held the answers, and the poor thing was so tired she was dozing intermittently as soon as they left the airport.
They arrived at the hotel, a big one in mid-town, and were shown to a room filled by a king-sized bed. Hennessy showed a sad, knowing smile when she saw the layout, and if the bellman hadn’t been nattering away, Townsend would have burst into tears. It was impossible to believe that two years had passed since they’d been alone in a bedroom. But their physical familiarity was a thing of the past, and if Hennessy was as serious about her mystery friend as it looked like she was, that intimacy would never be reestablished.
The bellman left, and they regarded each other with trepidation. “I guess I’ve got some explaining to do, huh?” Hennessy asked. She yawned so wide it was almost funny, but the tension in the room didn’t allow for much levity.
“I don’t think explaining is the right word. But I’d like to know what’s going on, and why you didn’t tell me.” She looked away from Hennessy’s eyes. “That’s the part that hurts. I know we haven’t been talking but—”
Surprisingly, Hennessy took Townsend by the hand, led her to an overstuffed chair and pulled her onto her lap. It was as strange a feeling as Townsend could ever remember having. Hennessy had never been so bold, so physically confident. Even when they were “courting” she’d never done anything this intimate. But sitting on her lap felt as natural—as right—as any sensation she’d ever experienced.
There was something about Hennessy that felt like the home Townsend had never had. There was safety, security, and love in her embrace. True love—without reservation. Even nine months of silence hadn’t shaken her belief in their bond. Townsend settled against her body, trying not to luxuriate in the embrace. Knowing Hennessy, she was as good as married to the gorgeous woman she’d been trailing through the airport. Townsend was so lost in her musings she gasped when Hennessy started to sob. “I never, never, never meant to hurt you,” she murmured.
A stab of pain shot through her heart. Hearing her cry so piteously shook her to the core. “Oh, Hennessy, I would never believe you’d hurt me on purpose. That’s not who you are.”
“No, I’m not,” she agreed, her voice choked with tears. “But I was so conflicted. I needed to tell you, but we’d agreed not to talk while I was gone…” She sucked in a shaky breath. “That’s not true. I didn’t want to talk while I was gone.”
“That’s not true either,” Townsend murmured, stroking her hair reassuringly. “You didn’t want to talk while I was with Jenna.”
“Right.” Hennessy nodded, but didn’t linger on that point. “I couldn’t send you an e-mail. That was so damned cold.” She sucked in a breath and started to cry harder, her words nearly obliterated by her sobs. “I still love you so much.”
Burrowing into her embrace, Townsend rested her face against Hennessy’s neck, consciously trying to ignore the perfume that lingered on her skin. “I know you do.” She sat up and tenderly smoothed the dark hair away from Hennessy’s face. “I know you love me, just like I love you.”
A very sad smile tugged at her lips. “Yeah, just like you love me.” She took in a long breath and let it out slowly. “I didn’t want this to happen. I truly didn’t. But Kate and I started to click and…I was so confused. So I tried to act like an adult and I just told her.”
“Told her what?” Townsend asked, moving away enough to be able to see Hennessy’s face.
“I told her I couldn’t be with her because I was going to wait for you.”
Townsend gripped Hennessy’s shoulder, stunned. “I didn’t expect you to wait for me! For God’s sake, I’m with another woman!”
“I know that,” she said, the essence of sincerity. “But I wanted to. I wanted you to be the only woman I’d ever loved. I wanted to look back on my life when I was an old woman and say, ‘It was always Townsend. Only Townsend…’” She started to sob again, falling limply against Townsend’s body.
“Goddamn it! How did we let this get away from us?”
It took a long while for her to cry herself out, with Townsend tenderly stroking her head as the tears fell. Her body ached with the pain of loss, the heartbreak they’d put each other through.
Finally, Hennessy spoke, sounding old, exhausted. “I don’t know how we screwed this up.” Her body shivered, then she added, “That’s not true. I do know. It was timing and circumstances and lack of maturity. I’ve grown up so much in the past year,” she said, her voice still wobbly.
Pulling the dark head forward, Townsend repeatedly kissed the soft, smooth skin of Hennessy’s brow. “You’re right. That’s exactly it. But we can’t change time.”
“I know…I think…I think I know that,” Hennessy said, looking thoroughly confused.
“You need to get some sleep. You don’t look like you can put two sentences together.”
“God, I’m tired. I’m not one of those people who can stay up all night and function. Especially when things are so emotional.”
Townsend stood and helped her up, then Hennessy started to remove her jacket, getting it caught on a shoulder. Townsend helped her with it, then watched her kick off her shoes and fall, face first, onto the bed. Her head turned and she sucked in a breath, looking like she might cry again. “Will you lie down with me? You don’t have to if you don’t want to or you think it’s wrong…” A few more tears escaped. “It’d just feel so good to be close to you again.”
“Whatever you need.” Townsend kicked off her shoes, then removed her jeans, cuddling up behind Hennessy in her shirt and panties. “Is this good?”
Hennessy took her hand and tucked it around her waist. “Now I can sleep,” she said, and almost immediately her heavy breathing showed she meant it.
Townsend woke slowly, slightly disoriented. She wasn’t sure what time it was, but the sun was no longer shining in through the window and her stomach was trying to get her attention. She moved a little, tightening her hold around the long, still lean, but now slightly sturdier body she’d longed for and lusted after for so long.
With a soft, but fully awake voice, Hennessy asked, “How can I love both Kate and you? I thought love was something you could only feel for one person.”
Townsend let her lips linger on the crown of Hennessy’s head for a moment. Her hair smelled of spring and Townsend had to force herself to pull away from the beguiling scent. “When you learned about Jenna, did you think I’d stopped loving you?”