The Resurrection of Aubrey Miller (31 page)

“God, Bree…”

Kaeleb trails off as he rakes over my new appearance. My hair is above my shoulders, back to its original color and cut into a slant bob that begins at the nape of my neck and ends just below my chin. I’m dressed in one of Linda’s vintage dresses; a simple black number with lace overlay that fits snuggly across my entire body from the square neckline and Juliet cap sleeve, clear down to where it ends sharply just below the knees. My Mary Janes are four inches high,
thank you very much
, complete with straps that cross overtop my feet. I’m also donning Linda’s favorite pearl earring and necklace set, the round balls off-white in color as they shimmer from my ears and neck.

“You look absolutely gorgeous. Dare I say,
breathtaking
?” he finishes.

Giving him a shy smile, I accept his compliment, noting the use of his familiar endearment and trying to ignore the flutter in my stomach at the sight of him. His hair is also freshly cut, shaved to the perfect length along the back and the sides, but longer at the top, styled away from his forehead, forming his signature off-center peak. A black button-up covers his upper body, snug across his chest, tapered across his waist, and his sleeves, of course, are rolled up over his muscular forearms. The charcoal pants complete the look, hanging low on his waist, accenting his perfectly toned derrière and covering his long legs until finally forming a crease across the top of his shiny, black slip-on dress shoes.

I know my thoughts about him are inopportune, seeing as though we’re heading to the church for Linda’s service, but something tells me she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“You too, Kaeleb. Really, you look amazing,” I respond, a warm flush racing across my cheeks.

The corner of his mouth tips up, and with a sexy smile, he enters the house. But as I begin to shut the door, he stops the movement with the tips of his fingers. Giving him an inquisitive look, he merely chuckles. “I’ve got a surprise for you. Close your eyes.”

My eyes tighten as they lock onto his, not really sure if a surprise is what I need today. I’m already nervous and a bit flustered.

Growing impatient, his head drops to the side, and I know his stubbornness will outlast mine, so I close my eyes and clasp my hands in front of my body as I wait. I hear some shuffling, then a familiar giggle fills the air. My eyes shoot open and my hands fly to my mouth.

“Quinn?”

She bounces up and down a couple of times, excitement overwhelming her until she finally takes flight and runs into my arms, crushing me with her embrace.

I stumble back, bounding off my heels and catching her mid-motion, finally righting our bodies and squeezing her as tightly as my arms will allow. And—I kid you not—we bounce on our tiptoes in a complete circle as we squeal and giggle until the revolution is complete. When it’s done, we each take a step backward, maintaining our hold on each other’s forearms as we survey the changes in appearance.

Quinn’s hair is still impeccable, its long blonde strands wrapped tightly into a bun at the top of her head. Her body is healthy and her skin is glowing. The weight she’s gained has filled out her beautiful face, making her even more gorgeous than before as her green eyes shine with pure happiness. They’re no longer tinged with her hidden pain. They’re bright, joyful, and full of life. Her dress is also simple, a black maxi-dress with tiny straps
at the top, her body covered in a sheer layer of fabric that dances along the floor with her movements.

“Quinn, you look…”

“Wow, Aubrey, you look…”

As we break out into laughter, my heart fills to the brim with joy. I tear my stare from Quinn and look to Kaeleb who’s smiling ear-to-ear as he watches our interaction. The fact that we’re all here, together, makes my chest feel like it’s going to explode.

I mouth the words
thank you
and he simply dips his chin in return.

Redirecting my attention to Quinn, I ask, “How did you get here? I mean, I know your parents have been pretty overbearing lately.”

She throws her head back in laughter. “Yeah, you could say that, but Mr. McMadden here charmed the pants off my mother.”

My eyes grow wide as I slowly turn my head back in his direction, sending his hands flying up in his defense. “Hey! That was purely metaphorical.” Throwing a wink at me, he adds, “
Ninja charm
.”

“Oh. My. God. Get over yourself,” I say, rolling my eyes into the back of my head. Kaeleb laughs outright and Quinn, of course, makes a pitiful attempt to shield her giggle.

God, I’ve missed my friends.

Our reunion is short-lived, cut off by the fact that we need to get to the church. Once in Kaeleb’s car, my body is twisted in the passenger seat, practically hanging on Quinn’s every word as we catch up.

“What’s going on with that surfer dude?
Tommy
?” I ask, my facing breaking into a grin with Quinn’s love-struck smile. I immediately notice the difference between the one I saw with Josh and her newfound love. The previous one never quite reached her eyes and was wrought with insecurity, but this one is full and beaming, as her eyes light up with the confidence that she’s gained since I last saw her.

“He’s definitely
not
a surfer,” she responds with laughter. “He’s just, gaaaaaah! You know?”

I giggle at her lack of explanation because as I look to Kaeleb, with his own smile spreading across his face while he drives, I know exactly what she means. Sometimes it’s impossible for mere words to encompass how you really feel about someone. There’s nothing you could ever possibly say to adequately emulate the effect of that person’s presence in your life. It’s an overwhelming, indescribable feeling that consumes your heart and captivates your soul.

It simply just
is
.

Feeling my stare, Kaeleb tears his eyes off the road and they drift briefly to mine. He lifts his hand to stroke my cheek with his knuckles, offering me a simple, knowing smile. Our eyes catch, and although no words are spoken, so much is being said.

Five minutes later, we pull into the parking lot of the church only for my nerves to begin racing as I see people gathering by the front entrance.

Quinn hops out of the car as I remain, once again, firmly planted in my seat. My foot is tapping nervously on the floorboard as I wring my hands in my lap. I continue doing so until Kaeleb eventually covers them with his own, forcing me to look at him as I nibble my bottom lip.

“You’re going to do fine.”

I inhale deeply. “You think?”

“I know,” he responds quickly with a wink.

“Okay,” I release the breath. “Let’s get this over with.”

Quinn knocks on my window and opens the door. I reluctantly slide out of my seat, linking one of my hands with hers and the other through Kaeleb’s offered arm. Their presence fortifies me as we enter the church together.

Through the entire service, I focus on the framed portrait beside Linda’s casket, remembering her beauty and the life that she so willingly gave to me when she took me in. The true definition of unconditional love can be found in her smile as she stares back at me. Sniffles fill the air, and a few tears of my own course down my cheeks, but I find comfort in knowing that she’s no longer suffering. Knowing that wherever she may be right now, that she’s alive and happy and no longer in pain, soothes the ache in my chest.

When silence falls all around me, I know that my time to speak has arrived. Releasing the hands of both Kaeleb and Quinn, I stand and make my way to the podium. My fingers tremble as I pull out my speech and set it just under the microphone, finally gathering the courage to make eye contact with the crowd. My eyes drift over their faces. Some people I don’t know, some people I do, but one person catches my eye and gives me the push I need to speak.

Nervously smiling back at Palmer, sitting in the back row, I give him my thanks with a nod of my head before clearing my throat to begin.

“Um…I know the majority of you are surprised to see me up here. I’m sure some of you didn’t even know I could speak.” A collective laugh fills the air, further spurring my confidence. “My name is Aubrey Miller.” I glance to Kaeleb before looking back down at the paper in front of me. “For those of you who don’t know, Linda Walker was my legal guardian. She took me in at eight years old, after my parents passed away, and has been the one prominent figure in my life ever since. She was my mother, my sister, my friend, and my teacher. Her love was unyielding and her strength was admirable. Accepting me into her world, taking sole responsibility for me…well, she sacrificed a lot. I was her life from that point on, plain and simple. There was never a moment that I didn’t know how much I was loved or the extent to which I was cherished, as she often conveyed the endless depths of her caring, no matter how difficult I made it for her to express those emotions.”

Tears roll out of my eyes and I’m forced to take a breath before I can continue speaking. “To say I was stubborn is an understatement. But Linda…well, she was tenacious. And she was until the day she left us. Her battle with cancer was one that was incredibly difficult to watch, but as I witnessed it, I gained a newfound respect and admiration for this thing we call life. You see, Linda Walker not only gave me a home. She not only gave me family. She not only gave me unconditional love and patience. On top of all those things, she granted me the greatest parting gift of all, because in her death she passed on to me the importance of learning to how to fully
live
. Of finding wonder and amazement with each day that passes. Of the realization that certain things should never be taken for granted.”

I break to look at Kaeleb, and as his eyes glisten back at me, I know he understands the meaning of my next statement. “Of the absolute necessity of letting yourself love and be loved.”

A shy smile plays on his lips, and Quinn literally claps with excitement beside him. A slight laugh bubbles into my throat, but I force myself to stifle it as I end the eulogy.

“And for her many, many gifts that she so lovingly bestowed upon me, I will be eternally grateful. I love you, Linda. You are missed more than you will ever know.”

After wiping my cheeks, I fold the paper and place it back into my clutch before making my exit off the stage. My eyes are trained on Kaeleb, and my heart leaps in my chest as I head back to my seat, knowing that there will be no need for her to waste her time haunting me from the beyond.

There’s no way I’m
ever
letting this man go.

“GO!” Quinn yells, pushing me out the door, her face half full of laughter while the other half is attempting to look scary fierce. It’s not working. I can only take someone so seriously when they’re donning pink flannel pajama pants with their feet clad in big bunny slippers, the ears flopping all over the place with their movements.

“Quinn! Let me in! I want to change!” I yell back, trying to charge my way through the front door.

“NO! No changing! GO!” she adds, with another shove. Stepping back, I cross my arms over my chest and breathe in deeply.

“Quinn, Kaeleb just left like half an hour ago. I would look like an idiot if I went charging over there right now.”

She shakes her head and happily closes the door behind her. “No, you wouldn’t. You would look like you’re going to get the man you love.” She steps forward and sets her hand on my shoulder. “You told me you were finally to the point where you are
living
. I can’t imagine a better way to start that life than with that man by your side.” She laughs when I give her a conceding shrug, then gently pushes my body away from her. “Go.”

“What about you?” I ask.

She huffs. “I’ll be fine. You already showed me the bedroom. That’s all I need to know. Lord knows I’m stuffed with all the casseroles flying around this place tonight. I’m going to call Tommy, then head to bed.”

I tighten my gaze at her. “You sure?”

“Positive,” she responds. “Now get that hot ass of yours into that car and GO!”

Releasing a long, contemplative exhale, I finally relent. “Fiiiiiiine.”

She giggles and claps the entire way as she follows me to the car. Once I’m inside, I roll my window down, the uncertainty about this whole situation settling into my stomach with a thud. “What if —”

“Nope. Not gonna happen.” She heads back to the door, gesturing excitedly for me to call her afterwards. I nod as I watch her disappear into Linda’s house.

After the funeral, we had a lot of people come by for the repast. There were tears, there were hugs, there were laughs, and there were definitely A LOT of casseroles. Quinn wasn’t lying about that. Palmer came and went, giving me his condolences and surprising me with a tender embrace before he left. When the number of visitors began to trickle down, Kaeleb also headed out, explaining he was getting a hotel room in order for Quinn and me to catch up, which I had planned on doing until she forced me out the door.

I’m still shaking my head as I pull out of the driveway. She could have at least let me change into something more comfortable.

As I drive down the highway, I briefly glance down at my attire, feeling a little overdressed and underprepared to deliver my speech of a lifetime. My nerves are at an all-time high and my brain is in overdrive, listing every single reason that Kaeleb might not take me back. Sudden doubt replaces my earlier confidence with each passing thought.