The Pleasure Room (10 page)

“You're spiraling because you don't understand the emotions you feel. You don't want to enjoy what just happened, but you did. You didn't want to be aroused by the scene, earlier, but you were,” Alistair said, lightly running his thumbs over her arms as he held her.

“I've never...” Felicity's voice trailed off and she turned away.

Alistair took hold of her chin, directing her gaze to him. “There is no need for you to feel ashamed for enjoying the pleasures of your body. You don't need to feel regret for exploring your desires. What happened was so very beautiful. So freeing. You've learned something new about yourself tonight, Felicity.”

He wiped away the tears that had fallen from her redden eyes with the back of his fingers.

“There, there... none of that. This is cause for celebration about your breakthrough, sweetheart.” Alistair leaned over, kissing her forehead.

“My breakthrough?” Felicity asked, her voice cracking a bit.

Alistair lowered his exotic green gaze to her gray. “Yes... your breakthrough. You've been denying yourself all of the wonders you've convinced yourself you didn't like or were too 'perverted'. That is why you feel ashamed, but I tell you now, you shouldn't be. You're a grown woman who's just discovering the
real
you.”

“How do you know this is even the real me?” she challenged.

Alistair smirked. “I do adore a bit of defiance in my subs.”

She knocked his hand away from her face. Immediately she felt the loss of their connection, but she had to draw the line... right? She wasn't his “sub”.

“I'm not your
sub
,” she spat the word out as if it were poison.

“Yes, you are... or rather you
want
to be.”

Felicity threw her hands up, dismissing him and his proclamation. She turned as she buttoned her blouse.

“If you leave out that door without hearing my proposal, don't bother coming back,” Alistair threatened.

She stopped, hand poised on the doorknob. She turned.

“What proposal?”

She wondered why she even bothered to entertain him. She told herself it was for her story, but she knew it was something deeper than that. Something desperate.

Alistair leaned against his desk again, his hard-on imprint still present, but not as aggressive. He folded his arms across his broad, muscular, leather-harnessed chest. Felicity was finding it all the more harder to concentrate on anything he had to say when he looked so dangerously delectable. A part of her wanted to return the favor, or in more honest terms, she wanted him inside of her. But she couldn't bring herself to say it.

“I want to explore this side of you that you've held dormant. I want to liberate you, in a manner of speaking.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot, it's what you do,” she said, holding on to the last shred of her sarcasm in his presence.

“When I see there is a need for it, yes.”

In one of the boldest moves she'd ever witness a man do, he held his hand up to his nose, inhaling her sent. Her face blushed even more and she wanted to run from the room, but she didn't. She watched as his tongue lapped at the two fingers he'd used to give her the most intense orgasm she'd ever experienced. She could feel the tingling between her legs start to stir all over again. Her heart raced and her breathing began to quicken. Alistair's eyes held her the entire time and he smiled when he saw what effect he was having on her.

“You see, I can taste it on you. Your need, your hunger. I want to give it to you, what you long for,” Alistair said as he began walking towards her. He stopped short, only a foot of distance separating them. She could smell the intoxicating aroma of his, no doubt expensive cologne. Just as he could smell the scent of her jasmine-scented perfume so powerful it nearly made him cum inside his pants. Something he hadn't done since first discovering his own inclinations.

Felicity tried to speak, but her throat was too dry. She swallowed and licked her lips. Alistair's eyes followed the pink of her tongue as it ran along the flesh of her bottom lip. She could tell by his expression that he had his own ideas of what he wanted her to do with her tongue, hell, her entire mouth. The thought made her nearly delirious with desire.

She tried again. “What was your proposition?”

Another satisfied smile from Alistair. “I want you to give me just three months of your time. Not even all of your time. We're in the beginning stages, if you will, of your self-discovery. I want you to allow me to take you on this journey.”

“How does that even work?”

Alistair was pleased that her response wasn't a flat-out “no”. She seemed willing to learn more, at least. “There are some contracts that require  twenty-four/seven compliance. I do not wish to do that with you.”

“What do you mean, 'contracts'?” she asked, getting a bit nervous.

Alistair placed his hand on her shoulder, reassuringly, fingers gently massaging. “It's not anything  you need to be that concerned about. It's merely an agreement between the two of us. It's not even legal. I can't take you to court if you break it.”

“That's reassuring, if that's true?” she asked.

“It's not legally binding,” he promised.

“So we're supposed to do this contract thing and what... you own me or something?”

“In a manner of speaking, yes. But you needn't be afraid of that concept. I'm strict, but I'm also very rewarding and dare I say, laid-back,” another iceberg-melting smile. “You will live with me for the three months. Of course, you're allowed to go to work, but you must return home after your shift has ended.”

“What if I want to go out after work with my friends. I have a life, you know. It may not be all whips and ropes--”

“Not yet, but we're working towards that.”

“What?” she asked, confused.

Alistair cocked an eyebrow. “The whips and ropes and all sorts of other delightful toys I guarantee will make you curse the gods for having waited so long to direct you to me.”

“You're not deficient in the self-confidence department are you?” Felicity couldn't help herself. She was finding him even more irresistible. Never had she met a man so sure of himself.

Alistair shook his head. “The days of me not knowing who I was have long since passed.”

“Well, it's still my life, so can you answer my question.” She stared up at him, awaiting his answer. She couldn't believe she was even contemplating doing this, but she be damned if he tried to take her life away from her.

He crossed his arms over his chest again as he debated his next response. She was looking up at him, expectantly and he knew the wrong answer would send this little firebrand out the door. He wanted her all to himself, but he was willing to make some concessions if it meant she would be his.

“You will have to call me first for my permission.”

“What?” she barked. “I'm a grown woman, I stopped needing permission to do shit when I was eighteen.”

“This is a part of the contract negotiations. What you were used to doing on a daily basis is inconsequential. This will be our relationship dynamic. Right now, Pandora's box has been open for you and there's no closing it, as you well know. I'm offering you a consensual, safe and trusting environment where you can explore all of your hidden fantasies. The ones you told yourself you'd never entertain. Apparently, they're also the ones you've told yourself you're too good for.”

Felicity frowned, remembering how Gregory has accused her of being judgmental. “So, I call you for permission. Are you going to grant it?”

“That will depend entirely on my mood at the time as well as what I might have planned for you that night. But I am obliged to grant you permission from time to time if it is in our contract. I will honor it, especially if you really want to go out and you've been well behaved.”

Felicity narrowed her eyes, but at the same time, her heart skipped a beat.
What was it about this man that has her losing her damn mind?!
It's not like he was the first rich guy she'd ever met. Gregory was wealthy and so was that guy she worked for in college. It wasn't like he was the first charming man she'd ever met. Okay, so he was the most gorgeous and sexy and domineering and that fucking butter-melting accent wasn't helping her say “no” to him either.
Just what in the hell am I getting myself into?
She thought.

“So,” she began as she walked around him, taking a seat on the leather sofa in his office.

He followed, sitting down beside her. Their close proximity intensified their mutual attraction and Alistair's erection began to rekindle itself, but he forced himself to remain calm. He had to stay in control. Being that close to him, Felicity's heart was beating frantically as she felt the all too familiar stirrings of her desires rising to the surface again. It took everything she had to focus on what he was offering, when all she wanted to do was give in to him right then and there.

She continued. “I move in with you for three months... what about my own apartment?”

“As a courtesy on my part, I'll pay for your apartment for the three months you'll be living with me.”

Damn, that's nice
, Felicity thought. “So, are you going to have me walking around naked all the time?”

Alistair couldn't help but smile. The mere thought of her bared in full glory caused his arousal level to rise. He could feel his dick getting slicker from his precum in the heat of his pants. “You can expect days like that, yes,” he answered honestly.

The idea of walking around him and his house naked both excited and terrified her.
Am I really going to go through with this?
She asked herself.  “Will I have to follow your every command?”  
I guess I am going through with this.
 

“Yes.” His answer was so definite, she didn't need him to elaborate.

“I don't want to be put on display in your club.” Though she had to admit she enjoyed watching the show, she wasn't sure she'd ever want to be a part of the attraction.

“Fair enough. I will leave it open to you if you decide to change your mind in the future.”

“I don't like pain,” she said. “I don't want to be beaten to a bloody pulp, either.”

Alistair arched an eyebrow. “I'm not a monster. I enjoy causing what is defined as 'good pain'.”

“Good pain?” she repeated with more skepticism in her tone than what was necessary. “How is pain 'good'?”

In response to that, Alistair frowned, a slight creasing of his eyebrows and a barely noticeable downward tilt to his lips and she immediately regretted her question.

“That tone is not only unsavory, but intolerable. I'll not abide that, ever,” he corrected.

“I'm sorry... I just... was confused,” she conceded.

His features softened and that charming smile returned to his face. “All is forgiven.” He was pleased by how seamlessly she was taking to her role. He had been working her over from the moment they'd first met and knew secretly, his world was somewhere she belonged. He went on to explain the differences between “good” pain and “bad”.

“I do not seek to cause you harm. So there will be no scarring, piercing, injuring, branding or any other permanent markings.”

“Do people really get off on that?” she asked. This time it was more curiosity than scorn.

Alistair nodded. “Some do, just as well as those who are on the giving end of such things.”

“Have you ever... you know... been on either end?”

“Once. I was very young and testing my limits. I realized quickly that it wasn't for me, but not without a parting gift that I am still very grateful for.” He gave her a wickedly delicious grin that peaked her curiosity all the more.

Felicity was relieved to learn that she wouldn't have to endure those other things. She couldn't help but wonder if she'd let him do those things to her anyway? “Okay, so you explained what's bad pain. Now, what's good about it?”

“It's hard to explain. It's a sensation that is painful and pleasurable and transcending. This is what I'm more interested in. This is what I want to awaken you to and that is why this discussion we're having is so very important,” Alistair said. “If ever you feel that you need a break or you want me to stop all together, you must use your safe-words.”

“Ah, I know about those,” she said, remembering her minor research.

“If you need me to slow down so that you may get accustomed or you need a break, simply say 'yellow'.” Alistair's expression proved he was deadly serious, so Felicity took him seriously.

“All right. What if it's too much for me?”

“If you become too overwhelmed, simply say: 'red' and I will stop.” He held up a finger. “But take heart, do not use these words lightly. They are not to be abused as we are trying to establish trust in our relationship. To simply belt them out the moment you feel uneasy about something we're doing would be a violation of that trust. I am no novice, I will know when you are just panicking and when you've really had more that you can take.”

“Why would that be a predicament? I thought you didn't want to hurt me?”

“I don't. But to truly allow yourself to experience this lifestyle, you have to be willing to endure some things. It's for your own benefit and in the end, enjoyment.”