The Pirate's Desire (31 page)

Lucinda still suffered through nightmares which replayed the night Jonathon had tried to rape her. She awoke gasping with fear…and always before Riel rescued her. Why?

The days passed slowly. Lucinda felt terribly alone, and she hated it. She missed Sophie, and grieved for her friend as she tended the garden they’d planted together. The little rose bush bloomed hardily, as did the other plants.

The summer slowly slipped into late August, and Amelia invited her to stay for a week at their house. Lucinda enjoyed that happy time. She also noticed that Timothy Fenwick came to call more than once.

“He’s sweet on you,” she giggled to Amelia one day. They sat on the wide swing which hung from the Carlisle’s largest oak tree.

“Perhaps I’m sweet on him, too. He does have a charm about him.”

“A cute, puppy dog charm.”

Amelia said nothing, and Lucinda felt instant concern. Perhaps her friend had taken her comment the wrong way. “You know I like Timothy, Amelia.”

Her friend pushed off with her toes, and they started swinging again. “I know you do. I must say, I never thought I’d fall in love with a younger man.”

“You’re in
love
?” Lucinda squealed and hugged her. “Oh, Amelia! I’m so happy for you!”

Amelia pinkened, and a happy smile lit her face, which was never less plain than now. “He’s already declared himself to Father, but we’ve decided to wait until he’s twenty, at least. Perhaps he will change his mind by then.”

“Amelia! He will not. He is totally besotted with you, and you know it.”

Amelia smiled again. “And what about you, Lucinda? Have you admitted yet that you’re in love with the Baron?”

It was Lucinda’s turn to fall silent. “I do love him,” she admitted.

“I knew it all along.”

“But so many things have happened between us. I was a brat for the first year, and then chased Jonathon…and then everything else happened.” Lucinda had at last told her best friend everything that had happened in London…and about Riel’s past, too. Amelia agreed with Lucinda. Riel was guilty of nothing at all.

“So you don’t know how he feels about you.”

“Why would he have any feelings for me? I was a shrew to him half the time, and the other half I pushed him away, and
ran
away. I’ve been such a fool, Amelia. And he left on this last voyage so fast I think he was glad to see the back of me.”

“Are you sure?”

“I am sure of nothing with that maddening man! He drives me up the wall and down the other side.”

“Did he say when he’ll be back?”

“October.”

“When at last you’ll turn twenty. Didn’t your father want you to wait until then to marry?”

“Yes. But I see no one in sight to marry. Perhaps I will turn into an old maid.”

Amelia looked at her with sympathy and amusement. “Lucinda, come visit me after your birthday. Promise me.”

Lucinda’s brows furrowed in confusion. “Of course. Now, tell me again…when did Timothy actually propose?”

* * * * *

October, 1814

The summer months passed with excruciating slowness for Riel. True, he’d promised a shipment to a longstanding, faithful buyer, but he also longed to be with Lucy.

Hopefully, the time apart would allow things to settle between them. Lucy had needed time after Jonathon’s attack and Sophie’s death to recover. And to process the revelation of his sordid past.

Riel still did not know how Lucy felt about him, but she did believe he was innocent of murder. That fact allowed the deepest wound inside him to begin to heal. Sophie had tried to convince him of the same thing for years, but Riel hadn’t been able to accept her words. Instead, he’d felt consumed with guilt over his actions…and the fear that he might repeat them one day.

But he hadn’t, not even in the one brief, blinding moment when he’d wanted to kill Jonathon.

At last, Riel allowed himself to accept God’s forgiveness for his past sins. And at last he began to forgive himself. One day in his cabin, he dropped to his knees and in wonderment thanked God for his grace and forgiveness, and for the healing that finally soothed his heart.

And Riel hoped—perhaps foolishly—that Lucy might nurture deeper feelings for him. He remembered the tenderness in her eyes when she’d told him she believed he was innocent, and the vehemence with which she’d insisted he was an honorable man. Could she possibly love him?

The days of summer slid past on the high seas. Standing on the humming deck of the
Tradewind,
with the wind driving her at a fast clip through the choppy seas, cleared Riel’s mind of all but one most important fact.

He loved Lucy, and he wanted her to be his wife. He needed her with a ferocity that shook him. Falling in love had never been in his plans, but if there was the slightest chance she might love him even a little…

When Riel got home, he would find his answers. He loved her, and he’d pursue Lucy until her smart, pretty mouth finally admitted what she truly felt for him.

October arrived, and so did the end of his successful voyage. Two days later, Ravensbrook’s tall, three story stone structure loomed around the last copse of trees. Riel’s heart beat faster. Lucy. At last, he’d see her.

Would she meet him at the front door, with her blue eyes soft and smiling?

He wanted nothing more than to gather her in his arms and hold her close.

He was almost home. Would he at last find a home for his heart, as well?

The crunch
of wheels on the drive made Lucinda hurry to her bedroom window. A groomsman ran up to the matched pair of blacks hitched to the black carriage. A familiar carriage. She gasped. Riel!

He was here! For some reason, she’d believed he would arrive on her birthday, still two weeks away.

Lucinda could not speed fast enough down the stairs. She peered out the front window. The carriage door opened without the driver’s assistance. So like Riel. And then, as her heart skipped and bumped with joy, Riel vaulted up Ravensbrook’s steps, his strides long and lithe, as if he couldn’t wait to burst inside.

The butler opened the door with a bow and a flourish. “Lord Iveny.” Wilson refused to speak to a nobleman without using his full title.

“Wilson.” Riel’s tall, muscular frame filled the doorway and his gaze immediately focused upon Lucinda.

With a trembling smile, she moved forward. “Riel.” Once again, his sheer size, and the intensity that was only Riel, hit her heart hard, making it race.

Uncharacteristic shyness slowed her steps. She loved him. More than ever before, this certainty stabbed her with the force of a lightening bolt. She loved him with all of her heart, but what could a wonderful man like Riel possibly feel for her? A ward thrust upon him. An ungrateful one for that matter, and one who had caused him no end of grief over the past two years.

In two strides Riel closed the distance between them. He caught her hands and looked down at her, his dark eyes steady and curiously intent. “Did you miss me, Lucy?”

Words caught in her throat. She had, and too fiercely. “How…how could I miss a man as irksome as you?”

His slow, soft smile befuddled her. She felt lost…bewildered by that unfathomable black gaze of his.

Riel leaned forward and kissed her forehead. Not what she had hoped for, but it felt heavenly. His warm lips lingered, speeding up her heart so it pulsed through her body, making her short of breath. “I missed you, too, Lucy.” He released her. “Now, what have you been about while I was gone?”

She immediately missed his touch, and that scandalous realization warmed her cheeks. “I must see about dinner. Mrs. Beatty must be warned to set another place.”

* * * * *

Later, after a hastily planned supper, for which Lucinda had asked Mrs. Beatty to prepare all of Riel’s favorite dishes, her guardian leaned back in his chair. “You know how to refresh a man, Lucy.”

Lucinda’s cheeks warmed. “Thank you. I think.”

He watched her, as if gauging her every response.

She frowned, willing her cheeks to cool. “Must you stare at me in such a manner? It is rude, as you know.”

“Is it rude to want to memorize every line of your face? It is all I could carry of you on my voyage.”

What was he
saying
to her? Her heart beat faster. “Kindly do not play games with me, Mr. Montclair. Would you like dessert?”

“I would like to walk in the garden with you.”

“Now?”

“Now.” He stood and dropped his napkin on the table.

When she stared up at him, he held out his hand. “Are you coming?”

She stood without his help. Her heart tripped dangerously fast. “Mrs. Beatty will not approve of us missing dessert.”

“Will you not hold my hand, Lucy?” His gaze held hers.

“Of course,” she said pertly. “Your wish is my command.” With a quick breath, she looked at the broad, tanned hand he held out to her. She slipped hers into his, and his warm, calloused fingers closed around hers.

Heart bumping with questions, she accompanied him to the terrace, and then down the steps to the garden.

“The blooms are gone,” he said quietly.

“It is fall. A time of death and decay.”

“Necessary before renewal.”

“Yes,” she agreed.

“But even amidst death, hope blooms.”

Puzzled, she looked up at him. “What do you mean?”

“Look.” He pointed, and then she saw the tender yellow bloom on Sophie’s rosebush. By rights, it was well past time for new blossoms. All the old ones had been deadheaded away. But this one furled open like the sun, infusing light and color and the hope of spring in the midst of the fall.

Lucinda knelt and dipped down to smell its sweet fragrance. Tears gathered in her eyes as Riel knelt beside her.

“Sophie and I planted this.” A tear slipped down her cheek. “It’s tenacious, just like she was.”

His arms went around her and without a word, she crumpled into him. “Sophie’s not gone, Lucy,” he said, holding her tight. “I think that flower is to remind us, don’t you?” She nodded wordlessly. When she at last pulled back, he offered her a handkerchief.

She dabbed her eyes and blurted, “I don’t want to lose you, too, Riel.”

He tugged her to her feet, which was a more comfortable position than kneeling on the ground. “Have your feelings for me changed, Lucy? You don’t want to chase me off any longer?”

Lucinda smiled and sniffed. “It never worked, did it?”

“No. And it will not.”

“Good.” She felt relieved, but then bit her lip. “When do you leave again?”

“You already want to get rid of me?”

“No! Truly, you are an impossible man with whom to have a civil conversation.”

“I want the truth between us, Lucy.”

The truth? She was scared to tell him the deepest truth in her heart. What if he didn’t feel the same way about her? And by rights, he shouldn’t. Hadn’t she caused him endless headaches over the past two years?

All the more reason for her to take courage in hand and take the first step now.

Slowly, she said, “All right. I’ll tell you the truth. You’ve done an exemplary job as my guardian. No one could have done it better.”

“Really? Exemplary?” A smile tugged at his mouth.

“Yes,” she returned, lifting her chin a fraction. “And if you are quiet, I will pay you more compliments.”

Surprise lifted his brows, but he remained silent.

“All right, then.” Lucinda searched her mind for the best words to convey what she saw in this man, and a little more of what she felt for him. “I look up to you…and
not
just because you’re bigger than me. Be certain of that. I’ve always respected you, Riel, much as I tried to fight you at every turn. You were a force to reckon with, and it maddened me, again and again, how right you were on
almost
every occasion.”

She smiled. “I needed you to be reasonable and fair and strong, and you were. And I respected you for insisting that I heed your words. I knew you were looking out for my best interests all along, and I did listen, even though at times I kicked and screamed the whole way.”

Something flickered deep in those dark eyes. “And now, Lucy?”

Her heart caught in her throat. “Now…” She swallowed. “Now I have discovered no other man compares to you. You have quite spoiled me for all others, Riel Montclair.”

A faint smile tugged at his lips. “Does that mean all others will leave the picture?”

Her heart pounded unnaturally fast. “Yes. If…if you wish it.”

“Lucy,” he growled, and tugged her close to him. “If I
wish
it? Yes, I wish it. You are all I’ve been able to think about, night and day, for the last year and a half.”

“I am?” A smile of pure wonder bloomed. “Truly?”

“Yes, you minx. You got under my skin from the first.”

“Are you sure you didn’t want to flay
into
my
skin?” she asked slyly.

He smiled, and glanced down at the rosebush. “When I see that yellow rose, it reminds me of you.”

“Of me? Because of the thorns?”

“No, Lucy. Because it is beautiful, like the sunshine you pour into my heart.”

Riel thought of her like sunshine? “But what about all the maddening things I’ve done to you?”

He smiled. “The spice. But you are sweet underneath it all. The way you cared for Sophie all those months, and the way you care for me, and helped me to forgive myself…” His fingers brushed her cheek. “You make me feel whole, Lucy. You make me feel hope.”

Lucinda didn’t know what to say, but a soft, sweet emotion burgeoned inside her as she looked up at him.

Riel took her hands in his. “Lucy, I love you. That’s why I wouldn’t let another man have you. It’s true. I scared all of your suitors away, although I didn’t realize it until later. I wanted you all for myself.” He watched her, his gaze vulnerable, as she had never seen it before.

She drew a shaky breath of pure joy. “Riel, you pirate,” she whispered. “You stole my heart a long time ago.”

Incredulity, followed by quiet, intense joy flickered across his features. “You love me?”

“
Yes.
”

“Then you will marry me?”

“Of course I will!” She managed to smile. “Although what I’ll do with a bossy man like you, I don’t know.”

“Love me,
chéri?
”

Lucinda flung herself into his arms. “I do love you, Riel, with my whole heart.”

It felt heavenly to be in his arms. After a moment, Lucinda’s lips curved against his jacket. “I think Father and Sophie are pleased, don’t you?”

“I think this was your father’s plan all along.”

Lucinda grinned. “He was a clever man. I’m glad he put you in my life—irksome though you have been from time to time.”

“I do everything because I love you.”

“I know,” she said softly. “And I love you, too. I want only to be close by your side, from now to forevermore.”

His eyes glinted down at her. “You don’t think that will be dangerous?”

“I count on it,” she said cheekily. “I can think of nothing more exciting than our passionate battles.”

His black eyes burned a smoky color. “I promise you their resolutions will be most satisfying.”

Her cheeks flamed. “Riel Montclair!”

“You do not want it?”

Her face flamed hotter. “I do. But you are a wicked, wicked man to suggest such things to my maidenly ears.”

He chuckled, and drew her close against him so they touched at every point possible. “How soon will you be my wife, Lucy? I have waited far too long already.”

Daringly, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “In two weeks, when I turn twenty? Will that be soon enough, my wonderful, honorable guardian?”

He shook his head. “Not nearly, my sweet Lucy.”

She grinned. “Perhaps then tomorrow, my wicked pirate.”

“Then a pirate I must be.”

“I knew it from the first.”

“As I knew you were a beautiful spitfire.” Riel kissed her at last, slowly, thrilling her to her toes. “But I did not suspect you would steal my heart.”

She smiled up at his handsome face, so very close to her own. Joy blossomed in her heart. “I love you,” she whispered.

Never would either of them be alone again. Somewhere in heaven, she knew Sophie and Father were smiling.

“And I love you,” Riel murmured. “Forever.” He sealed his new promise to her with a kiss.

The End