The Ocean (15 page)

“You did what you felt was right at that time. I’m not mad at you. I’m sure she wil understand.” She stroked his arm trying to comfort him.

“I don’t care about her; I’m angry with myself. I gave into that anger. I’m just like HIM.” He rested his head against the locker and looked at the ceiling.

“You are NOTHING like him.” She stared at him, not believing what he said.

“Because I hit a boy instead of a woman?” He turned to look at her.

“Because you are NOTHING like him,” she repeated. He hugged her.

“I needed that,” he said. Then he looked over to me. “You sure you want to be a part of this messed up family?” Gia smirked, as she pul ed away from him, suddenly looking shyly at me.

“Without a doubt,” I chuckled. “You’re stil going to the dance though, right?”

“Yeah, Gloria said she’d be my date. I’m escorting her anyway.” He shrugged. And just like that Kiarah was out of his mind. We went back inside and rejoined the conversation at our table, now a discussion about whether or not pink would look good on Patrick. His date’s dress was Pepto-Bismol pink. I was so grateful that Gia had picked a color that wasn’t too girly, even though her dress was, and I couldn’t wait to see her in it.

Luckily, Gia was able to join me for dinner. Oliver was home when I dropped Alex off and agreed to al ow her to come with me to my house. My mom had gushed about her after their shopping afternoon. She was pleased in everything about her. That only reinforced my feelings for her. I’d begun trying to come up with ways to tel her, and imagining the look on her face, when I told her I loved her. Then I’d imagine her saying it back to me. That brought a whole wave of emotions, along with dread and fear of what if she didn’t love me? I tried to talk myself out of that. It was stil in the back of my mind. What if it was too soon to feel this or too soon to tel her? I didn’t real y know what the appropriate time frame was to tel someone how you felt about them. I wasn’t sure if there was one. I thought that if you felt a certain way about someone you should tel them. I wanted it to be special, and a surprise, even though I knew how she felt about surprises. I was almost sure she’d like this surprise.

Al these things were stil going through my mind during dinner, so I didn’t hear the question Hailey asked me. I just looked at my plate until I felt eyes on me. I looked up and the three of them looked at me expectantly.

“Sorry, I was, wel , what did I miss?” I looked from face to face.

“I asked if you were going to help me bring down my painting for Gia,” Hailey said.

“Is it done? I thought you said yesterday you wanted to add some more things to it?”

“I finished it today. Gia said she would put it up in her room.” Hailey caught me up to speed on the conversation. I stood and went upstairs and got the painting that looked like an abstract version of a vase of purple roses. My sister had many talents. It could have been sold in an art gal ery. It was a large canvas with bright colors surrounding the roses. When she saw it, Gia gasped.

“It’s so beautiful.” She was sincere in her praise.

“I thought of you as I painted it. You were my inspiration, Gia.” Hailey beamed. Mom beamed, too.

“You’re so talented,” Gia said, as she stood and came around the table and hugged her.

Hailey continued in a hushed tone, meant only for Gia and her to share. “I know you’re sad a lot about your mommy, but I’l share mine with you when you need her.” She patted Gia’s cheek. Gia leaned her forehead against Hailey’s.

“Thank you.” I barely heard her whisper. “You are amazing.” They hugged again. I put the painting by the door and sat back down at the table. We finished dinner, and Gia and I cleaned up the dishes with Hailey helping by putting them away. Then Gia and I went upstairs to do homework.

She sat down on my bed and began to drag books out of her bag. I closed the door. She looked up at me, surprised because we usual y left the door cracked whether we were at her house or mine. Before she said anything, I lunged for her, knocking her on her back with me on top of her.

She giggled, and I smoothed her curls away from her face. Then we were kissing. I didn’t kiss her first; she didn’t kiss me first; we just kissed. Our fingers entwined. At first, we traced each other’s bodies over our clothes. Her fingers trembled as her hands went under my shirt, touching my bare stomach. I kissed her harder. My hands found her bare skin as I traced her side. It instantly goose-bumped up under my touch, and I smiled in our kiss.

“Your hands are cold.” She giggled against my lips.

“Warm them up,” I mumbled, as I moved my lips to her jaw and her neck. She took a jagged breath. Our legs tangled. Her toes traced up my leg, raising my jeans. It was driving me crazy, the way she was touching me, unsure of her moves, but somehow knowing exactly what to do. My hand moved to her stomach, and I felt her muscles tighten as she pul ed my face to hers.

“I love being with you,” I whispered, as my lips moved over her cheek to her ear. She crushed me to her, holding me tight.

“I like being with you, too,” she breathed. I tried again.

“I love holding you like this.” I lifted myself up to look in her eyes.

“I do, too.” Her eyes hid something, but she smiled at me stil . She wasn’t ready. Why was I trying to plan this out? I just wing things; I don’t try so hard. That is how things come together the best. I’d just wing it and when it felt right, I would tell her. I kissed her again. Then reluctantly, I let her sit up.

We did our homework and stole glances at each other. It was the least productive study session we had ever shared. I couldn’t stop thinking about her in my arms, and I had a feeling she was envisioning the same scenario.

“Debate. What makes a good debate? It’s not the topic you choose; it is more the research put into the subject. You can believe something, but if you can’t prove it, wel then, good luck convincing someone else to. But personal convictions alone do not make a good debate. We need facts and proof as to why your view is the one we should choose. I want you to pair up and pick a topic relevant in today’s media, pick your side, and research your view on the subject. You wil then debate your subject on Monday. We wil decide who won the debate by vote. That is just for fun; I wil give you your final grade based on your subject, research, and eloquence.” Mr. Franklin waved his arms dramatical y. “So pick your partners and discuss your subject.” He left his podium and sat down at his desk. Gia turned sideways in her seat and faced me, and I smiled knowing we’d be working together.

“Any favorite, relevant subject?” she asked.

“I’d like to do something light-hearted, not too serious.”

“I’d like that, too.”

“We’l research it this evening.” I winked at her. Then I paused, knowing I should tel her before she found out another way. So I leaned in close to her. “There’s something I have to tel you though, not about the assignment.” I motioned toward the front of the class.

“Should I be nervous? You’re so serious.” She leaned in closer so we were inches apart. I played with the corner of my notebook, bending it back and forth.

“I hope not. It’s real y no big deal. But I think you should know.” I paused again until she nodded for me to continue. “I’m apparently going to be Jil ian’s escort for homecoming court.”

She leaned away from me and barely whispered, “What does that mean?”

“It means I stand beside her on the float, on stage, and we dance together during the court dance.” She almost looked hurt. I reached to hold her hand, but she pul ed it away from me.

“I don’t want you to escort her. It’s wrong for me to say, but I don’t.” Her eyes didn’t meet mine.

“I don’t want to either, but it was the assignment Mrs. Henrick gave us. It sucks, but I don’t want you to read anything into it or to be nervous about it.

I’l do it, and then it wil be over.” She final y looked up at me and nodded OK. I knew she trusted me, but it stil scared her.

At practice, we al ran extra laps because it seemed everyone was one step behind, dropping bal s and missing blocks. I guess al our minds were on the coming weekend. Coach’s face kept turning that dangerous red color. We al knew he’d had a heart attack two years ago, so this wasn’t a good sign. Afterwards, when we were heading to the locker room, Chiz walked up to Mason and me.

“Guys, sorry about last week. I was out of line.” He didn’t look at us; he looked at his feet. “I hope we can put it al behind us. Coach is right; I guess we’re a team and a family.” He looked up hopeful y at us.

“Sure,” Mason and I said at the same with the same reluctance.

“Cool. Then after the game Friday, we’re going to have another bonfire. We only have a few more weeks that we can surf before the gulf turns cold.” He turned to begin the laps that Alex had already started. Then he cal ed back over his shoulder, as an afterthought, “Bring your girls, too.” He went back to running. Mason and I shrugged at each other. Like that, our fight was over, and we would be hanging together this weekend.

Chiz and Jil ian didn’t know, but shortly after I broke up with her, I found out that they were sleeping together. She also slept with Brandon and Ethan while we dated. I don’t real y care who else she slept with. It happened. There was nothing I could do about it. I regretted more now, since Gianna, that she was my first; but the fact that I didn’t care about Jil ian cheating said something about how I real y felt about her. Sometimes I wondered if I just avoided conflict, or if I real y did believe what I always told Mason—that some things just aren’t worth getting angry about. My philosophy was that it al comes out in the end, and people get what they deserve eventual y. Sometimes I think that I’d like to be there when Jil ian gets hers, but whether or not I am, she wil get hers one day.

As I waited for Alex, I sat in the bleachers. I leaned back on my elbows on the seat behind me and my feet stretched out in front of me. I heard footsteps approaching me. I turned to see Kiarah stepping up on the bleachers gingerly, her eyes focused on Alex. I turned to see him running, his back was toward us. She came and sat beside me. I looked back at her. She was chewing on her bright red lower lip. She took a deep breath.

“I screwed up with him.” She looked at me with a pained expression.

“Maybe a little. He and Gia have been through a lot in the past year. I think he just wanted you to listen to him and support him,” I sighed.

“Yeah, I realize that now. I just get so caught up in my own convictions.” She continued watching him. He was running toward us now, and he saw her, too. He averted his eyes and focused on his running.

“This wasn’t about you though. It was about them, Gia and him. Wel , that’s not true either. This was about Mason, him, and me. It wasn’t fair to bring you guys into it, but after it was al over, and after you knew he already felt like junk, you should have just supported him. That’s what being a good boyfriend or girlfriend is about; it’s not how you feel sometimes.” I shrugged. I felt bad having to tel her this, but she needed to know. Her actions caused my friend pain. I hated the fact that my friends were suffering.

“You’re only a junior right?” she asked. I nodded.

“And you’ve only dated Jil ian before Gia?” She knew the answer to that, but I nodded again.

“How are you the perfect boyfriend? Jil ian is evil, and you are so good. Gia’s lucky; I hope she appreciates you.” I shrugged again.

“I heard today that he’s going with Gloria.” Kiarah watched him again.

“Yeah, he’s her escort for the homecoming court anyway, so I guess it makes sense.”

“He was out of my league anyway; I don’t know what he saw in me. We didn’t have anything in common. I guess I can be relieved that we figured it out earlier rather than later when I was in love with him.” She looked at me again, her eyes sad. “Or more than I am now I guess.” She stood. “I’l see you around, Travis.” I held up my hand to say bye, and she left. Once she was gone out of sight, Alex came over to the fence in front of where I was sitting. I tossed him the water bottle I’d brought from the locker room for him.

“What did she want?” He looked in the direction she left.

“To admit that she screwed up; I guess she knew you’d get the message if she told me,” I sighed.

“We both screwed up. Maybe I’l talk to her tomorrow.” He paused. “I’ve got to shower and then we can go.” He didn’t wait for a response; he turned and went toward the lockers, finishing his water on the way.

Gia hung Hailey’s painting on the wal that faced her bed. She centered it, and it real y looked nice. We sat there on her bed listening to her ‘90s pop play list, songs from N’Sync, Backstreet Boys, and Britney Spears to Puff Daddy and Biggie Smal s. I couldn’t believe that she was forcing me to listen to this. Then a song from En Vogue came on.

“You weren’t even alive when this song came out!” I teased, as I threw one of her pil ows at her. She deflected it and giggled.

“I was too! I was like three.” She leaned toward me, shoving me with her shoulder.

“Friday after the game, the group is getting together for late night surfing and a bonfire,” I said as casual y as possible. She stil stiffened.

“Who al is going to be there?”

“Probably everyone. Chiz apologized, so we’re as cool as we can be; I mean he’s not my friend, but I don’t want to give him a black eye or anything.” She cringed at my joke. “Too soon?” I asked. She nodded.

“I don’t want to be his best friend; I just hate having this wedge in the team, you know?” I sighed and leaned into her.

“That’s because you hate conflict.” She rested her head against mine.

“I think that’s a good quality, but you’re making it sound like it’s a bad thing.” I hoped we weren’t getting ready to have our first fight.

“Why can’t you talk to Mrs. Henrick and see if you can escort the other girl—what’s her name?” She thought about it for a moment.

“Courtney,” I final y supplied.

She continued, “I don’t have an issue with anyone else. You have a history with Jil ian, and she stil wants to be with you. I trust you, but I don’t trust her.”

“Believe me, I don’t want to escort her either. It’s too late to get out of it now. It’s two days away. I told you I would quit, but you said you didn’t mind.” I didn’t want to argue with her.