His smile fell, his eyes growing serious. “I’m good, Cameron. I feel great. Alive.”
“Your memory?” I asked, trying to keep the hope from my voice.
He shook his head and my hope plummeted. “Still gone.”
So there was a limit to what I could do. “I’m sorry.”
“No. It’s okay.” As if to reinforce his statement, he cupped the back of my head and before I could blink, his lips were on mine. A quick kiss, but a sure kiss, as if we belonged together. He pulled back, but his fingers remained, entwined in my hair, holding me captive.
I could hardly draw air that close to him; my lungs seemed to shrink as a heated charge of electricity branched between us. I wanted to breathe in his essence; I wanted to touch him, for him to touch me. I never wanted to lose him again. It was hard to believe he was here, that we’d escaped. A sudden sting of tears blurred my vision. Ugh, but I was tired of crying. I had no room in my life for weakness, not anymore. Embarrassed, I started to turn away.
“Hey,” he whispered, grasping my arm. “What’s wrong?”
I shook my head. “Nothing.” Turning my back to him, I lifted the pitcher of water on the small bedside table and poured a glass. I wouldn’t cry in front of him; I was done crying. “Here.”
He took the cup, our fingers brushing. I felt the touch all the way to my soul. Bemused, I turned on the bedside lamp, the light chasing away shadows. His hands didn’t tremble as he drank. His skin was no longer pale. He had truly healed, his energy had been replenished. Even his wound looked better.
He set the glass down, smiled at me and lay back. With his hair buzzed so short, his eyes seemed even bluer, standing out against the white pillow. The color reminded me of the deepest part of the Caribbean. “You healed me.”
I nodded, a little amazed myself. More amazed that I was here…alone with Lewis.
He reached out, slipping his fingers through mine. With a quick jerk, he pulled me to him. I fell to his chest with a gasp of surprise. His strength had definitely returned. Content, I lay atop him, my legs between his with only the sheet and my clothing separating us. A tingle of awareness tiptoed down my body, a lovely aching need that I couldn’t quite ignore. The attraction was something that had always been. Something I couldn’t explain, but something I knew would always be.
I rested the side of my face against his heart, listening to the soft thump. Although the world was in turmoil, I could have laid there forever. He brushed the hair from my temples, smoothing it back in a way that calmed me, set me at ease for the first time in weeks.
“You shouldn’t have returned for me,” he whispered.
I sighed. “It was what anyone would have done.” I wasn’t a superhero, I was just… me.
He released a wry laugh. “No. Not just anyone would have done what you did. Why can’t you accept the fact that you’re different?”
I twisted the sheet around my fingers, flustered and confused. “Because I don’t need thanks for saving someone I…”
I jerked my gaze to him. Oh God. I’d almost said it. The words every guy dreaded. His smile wavered before falling completely. Nothing like ruining the moment. For a crazy moment I actually wished my dad would attack. Anything was preferable to looking into his shocked eyes.
I lowered my head, pressing my forehead to his chest. I’d taken down men twice my size. I’d even beaten my father at his own game. But this… this relationship with Lewis, whatever it was, remained beyond my abilities.
“I think I hear my mom calling me.” I started to move away but his fingers gripped my upper arm, stopping me. There was a seriousness in his gaze that made me nervous.
“Come here.”
I hesitated, then slowly lowered until our faces were only inches apart. He cupped the back of my head and pulled me toward him. Our lips met and his tongue swept boldly into my mouth. This was no sweet kiss. This was the kind of kiss that could get real heated, real out of control, real fast.
I didn’t care.
He wasn’t horrified by the fact that I’d almost spewed out my girly thoughts; he wasn’t going to push me away, terrified over what I’d almost said. I slid my arms around his bare shoulders, marveling over the feel of his muscle under taunt skin.
In one quick turn, he flipped me over and my back was pressed into the soft mattress. Lewis’ hard body settled atop me. He felt lovely, so very wonderful, and the weight of him only made me feel protected when I’d felt so alone for so long.
His lips left my mouth and pressed to my jawline, lower to my neck. A delicious shiver of warmth spread across my body. I didn’t want to leave this room. I didn’t want to see anyone else. I just wanted to stay here… with him forever. He was back at my lips, pressing his mouth to mine.
“You are amazing,” he whispered.
“Yeah,” I said bitterly, my mood souring. “The source.”
He laughed, a warm breath of air that whispered across my lips. “No.” He shifted so he was laying beside me. “That’s not it.”
I started to move away, but his arm wrapped around my waist, trapping me next to him. “What you’ve done, the crap your parents have put you through, it has nothing to do with who you are.”
His gaze turned so serious that I didn’t dare look away.
“Those are their issues, their egos, their insecurities that they’re shoving onto you. Not yours. You know, deep down, who you are; what you’re capable of. You are strong. You are brave. You are good. You’ve proven it again and again.”
His words sent a tingle of warmth through my body, something that wiggled and whispered temptingly through my soul. It wasn’t about my powers. It wasn’t about what I could do to save my family, or the world. It was about me being a good, decent person and Lewis saw that.
I traced the line of his jaw. “Do you mean it?”
“Yes.”
I swallowed over the thick lump of emotion clogging my throat. No one had ever been so sure of me. My grandmother had worried I would do something wrong and destroy everything. Dad was all about brainwashing me into joining his cult. And at times Mom seemed to want me to be exactly like her. But Lewis accepted me, just me.
“You know,” I said, sliding my fingertips over his short buzz cut. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
He grinned right before he lowered his head and kissed me once more, this time softer, gentler. His tongue like warm silk, slid against my lips, sending a shudder of need through me. My fingers bit into his shoulders; I was desperate to keep him close. How badly I wished the world would fade away and leave us here, alone.
Much too soon he pulled back, settling comfortably next to me. He only wanted to share a bed, but I wanted more. Still, I knew now wasn’t the time. Who knew if there would ever be a right time. But for now I was content to just sleep beside him.
He reached out and turned off the light, throwing the room into darkness. When he lay on his back, I cuddled into his side, warm, happy, for the first time in days…weeks. For a brief moment I could forget the outside world.
“Cameron,” he whispered.
“Yeah?” I closed my eyes, growing suddenly drowsy.
“I love you too.”
My eyes burst open, but I didn’t dare move. The words pierced my heart like an arrow through a bull’s-eye. Had I misheard him? Dreamt the words?
“What?” I whispered, daring him to repeat what he’d said.
“I love you.”
Nope, no imagination. I grinned, my chest expanding with warmth and happiness.
As Lewis wrapped his arms around me, bringing me closer, in the back of my mind wiggled the annoying realization that this could all end at any moment. My father would not give up; he would track us down and when he did, I knew neither of us would surrender.
But for now, here with Lewis, I was just a girl in love for the first time.
****
Although I didn’t want to leave the comfort of Lewis’ arms and the privacy of the bedroom, when Nora came knocking just after the sun had risen I couldn’t deny I was eager to learn more about my abilities. Yes, I was in love for the first time, but let’s face it, war was coming and as wonderful as our feelings were, they weren’t going to save anyone.
I’d been surprised when Nora had stayed behind with Lewis and Aaron, while I found myself in the car with Mom, heading toward Tybee Island. Although I was grateful to be away from the compound, to be clean and wearing a normal T-shirt and shorts, it was still an awkward drive. We didn’t say a word the entire twenty minutes; I had nothing to say and apparently neither did she. I couldn’t tell if she was still angry and frankly I didn’t care. I’d done what I had to and I wouldn’t regret my actions. Not now, and not even when my dad attacked... which he eventually would.
Mom slowed as a family on bikes rode across the road, the mother in front, and a father taking up the back. The children were young, maybe five and eight as they peddled their little hearts out. It was an uncomfortably silence that followed as we watched them disappear around a corner. I knew what she was thinking…time lost. We would never have that happy little family.
I slid mom a glance, but she didn’t bother to look my way as she started down the street once more. What was done was done, I supposed. Time to move on. Forget about the past; we had more important things to worry about, like whether there would be a future.
“We need to be ready.” Mom finally broke the silence as we pulled into Sierra’s driveway. Had she read my mind? I wouldn’t be surprised. I still wasn’t quite sure what she was capable of. But she was right, we did need to be ready and when the time was right, I planned on taking care of my father once and for all.
“When will he attack?”
I knew she had some sort of an idea. As Nora said, Mom always seemed to know things we didn’t. Whether it was from her powers, or the spies they had placed in the compound, I wasn’t sure. Whenever I asked, she found some way to brush off my questions. Maybe she didn’t trust me, or maybe she worried that if caught again, I’d divulge more information.
“John is recuperating. The attack really affected him, although he’s barely told a soul. They think he has the flu.”
I found no satisfaction in the fact that I’d won the battle against my father. How could I rejoice over harming my own dad? If anything, I felt ill because I knew more was to come. Yep, we put the ‘D’ in dysfunctional family. “Are you getting the information from Tara?”
Her jaw clenched as she turned off the car, the area settling into silence. She rarely showed emotion, but I could see the pain in her gaze and it startled me. “No. Tara is off the radar.”
What the heck did that mean?
Before I could ask, Mom opened the door and stepped outside.
Off the radar.
I pushed open my door and followed. She couldn’t mean—but I knew she did—Tara had been caught. Because of me. The guilt I was so sure I would never feel came rushing forward. I couldn’t seem to catch my breath as the weight of shame fell heavily upon my chest.
“No regrets,” my mom demanded. She stood tall and firm on the other side of the car. “In this world we don’t have time for them. You did what you thought was best. It’s time to move on. Time to prepare for their next attack.”
What I thought was best
, but I knew none of them agreed with what I had done. How could they not blame me for Tara’s disappearance? I sure as hell blamed myself. I slammed my door shut and moved around the front of the car. Why had I accepted Tara’s help?
Because I’d needed it. I wouldn’t have escaped without Maddox, without Tara, without so many others. “Tara’s children?” I was almost afraid to ask, but I had to know. Yeah, I hadn’t grown up with them, but they were my half-siblings.
Mom started down the boardwalk that ran the length of Sierra’s cottage. “They’re being tested to see if they have the powers.”
Her words left me ill. I’d known the moment I met them that they were mind readers. I had no doubt my dad would uncover the truth. Then who knew what would happen to them. I closed my eyes and leaned against the wooden railing, a wave of failure almost taking me under.
Dad would have no qualms about testing them to the point of torture. If they survived, he would turn them into mini S.P.I. agents. I’d have an entire new generation of family to fight. It would never end.
What kind of life would those children have? I found my mom and watched the way she moved toward the beach, so sure in her abilities and her beliefs. She was strong; she didn’t let the guilt get her down. Yeah, she had sent me away, but by sending me away I could grudgingly admit she might have saved me. Saved me from a childhood of fighting, a childhood of pain.
I curled my hands, my fingernails digging into the weather-worn railing. The worst part was that I knew I’d do it all over again. I had put everyone else, including myself, in danger to save my boyfriend, and I’d do it all again.
I pushed away from the railing and followed my mother. The roar of the waves combined with the cry of gulls and offered a familiar comfort. There was something about the ocean that calmed me, always had. It was in my blood, Grandma used to say. Thoughts of Grandma had my heart clenching, twisting painfully in my chest. I pressed my hand to my breast, as if that could stop the ache. Her family had come from Cornwall, England. Fishermen, she’d said. I wondered where my mother’s family came from. There was so little I truly knew about her.
I moved off the boardwalk and followed the path through the thick beach grass wavering on the early morning breeze. Mom paused at the water’s edge. She was silent and still, and I wondered what she was thinking. I kicked off my flip-flops, my feet sinking into the cool sand. The sun hadn’t risen high enough to warm the particles, but soon the heat would bring the world to life. Everything would go on whether I survived or not.
“When will he be here?” I asked.
“We have time. I’ll let you know when to worry.”
Ha, right. As if I could just set aside my anxiety. “So, how does this work?”
The wind tore her hair from her ponytail, tossing he dark strands around her face. “What?”
“This being the carrier of the source.” Sensing a whisper of energy, I glanced behind us. Sierra was watering the plants on her deck. My powers were growing; I felt the energy more often now… coming as easily as a breeze. She gave me a wide smile, but remained put, obviously knowing my mother and I needed time alone. “Is Nora the carrier of the source as well?”