The Man She Should Have Married (7 page)

Just from her body language and her hesitation in answering, he knew she was probably uncomfortable. Maybe even blushing. Olivia blushed easily. In fact, most of the time she wore her emotions for all to see. That was another thing he loved about her. There was never any subterfuge with Olivia. She was genuine through and through.

“He was just being nice, that's all,” she finally said.

“You know,” Matt replied carefully, “I don't blame him for being interested. Why wouldn't he be? You're a beautiful woman. And Mark's been gone a long time.”

“First of all, I'm not beautiful. And second, yes, Mark
has
been gone a long time, but I can't think about anything like that right now, Matt. I have to concentrate all my energy on this lawsuit.”

“You
are
beautiful, Olivia. I've always thought so.”

“I...” She stopped, looked out the window. “Can we please change the subject? You're...making me uncomfortable.”

“Sorry. I didn't mean to.”

“I know. It's just that... I'm not ready for a discussion about dating.”

He knew he'd pushed as far as he could right then. “Fair enough. New subject. Want to grab an early bite to eat before I take you home?” He had lightened his tone, but he felt encouraged, because he sensed something in the way she had reacted to him. Something that told him maybe, just maybe, he had a chance.

“Thank you, but Thea and I are having dinner at my mom's. She's making one of our favorites—
haluski
.” She pronounced it ha-loosh-key.

“Haluski?”
He'd never heard of it.

“It's an ethnic dish, basically noodles and cabbage, fried with lots of onions and butter. I made it for Mark a couple of times. He loved it.”

“Maybe I should invite myself to dinner,” Matt said lightly.

Olivia looked at him. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.” He grinned. “Single guys don't get many home-cooked meals.”

Once again, she hesitated before answering. “Well, I know Thea will be thrilled if you stay to dinner.”

“Only Thea?”

Suddenly Olivia laughed. “My mother will be thrilled, too. She likes you.”

“What about you?”

“Are you digging for a compliment?”

“Everyone likes compliments.”

“Okay. I'm glad you want to have dinner with us. There. Are you satisfied?”

Now that the tone of their conversation had changed, he decided to make one more attempt to burrow through her defenses. “I was hoping you'd say you liked me, too.”

He could feel her looking at him, but he kept his eyes on the road.

After a long moment passed, she finally said, “Of course I like you, Matt. You're part of the family.”

Because they were now approaching her mother's house, he let the comment go without answering. Because she was sending mixed signals, whether she knew it or not.

“Think it's okay for me to park in the driveway?” he asked a few seconds later.

“Sure.”

Olivia didn't knock first or ring the doorbell. She simply opened the door and walked in, beckoning him to follow. “Mom,” she called out, “we've got company for dinner.”

Norma Dubrovnik, looking like an older version of her daughter, emerged into the hallway. She was flushed, wearing an apron, and it was obvious she'd been cooking. She smiled when she saw Matt. “Oh, hi, Matt. It's good to see you.”

He smiled back. He liked her. She was just the kind of woman he wished his mother was. “Hi, Mrs. D. I hope you don't mind, but I invited myself to dinner.”

“I don't mind at all. I always make enough for an army.”

Just then, Thea came running out from behind her grandmother. “Unca Matt!” she exclaimed as they entered the house. “I'm getting a kitten!” Her smile lit her entire face.

“You are?” he said, scooping her up and twirling her around.

She giggled. “Yes!

“You're a lucky girl,” Matt said, nuzzling Thea's cheek.

“I know!” Thea said, squirming out of his arms and running down the hall where she was out of earshot.

“She's talked of nothing else since I told her we'd go soon,” Olivia said. She frowned. “But if we get a kitten, I don't know what we're gonna do on the days Thea has to go to day care. She won't want to leave the kitten at home.”

“Maybe I could take a leave of absence from work,” Norma said. “Then you could bring them both here instead of taking her to day care, especially while all this other mess is going on.” She'd dropped her voice, although Thea had disappeared into the kitchen again.

Olivia's mouth dropped open. “A leave of absence? What will Dr. Ross say? Who will do your job? Thea is my responsibility, not yours.”

“Dr. Ross can get a temp the way he does when I'm on vacation. I know if I talked to him he'd understand,” Norma said.

“No, I don't want you to do that. Besides, Mom, you do enough as it is, picking her up from day care and keeping her when I work the afternoon shift.”

“What do you think, Matt?” Olivia's mother said, turning to him. “Wouldn't Olivia's case be stronger if Thea wasn't in day care at all anymore?”

Matt hated to disagree with Olivia, but he thought her mother was right. He nodded reluctantly. “Your mom has a point, Olivia.”

Olivia sighed. “I'll think about it. Maybe
I'm
the one who needs to quit working.”

By now, they'd moved into the kitchen, and Matt, lured by the good smells wafting from the big cast-iron skillet on the stove, walked over and peered at its contents. “Looks great,” he said. “Smells great, too.” He was a sucker for any kind of pasta.

“Wait'll you taste it,” Olivia said.

“I made sausage, too,” her mother said.

“Better and better,” Matt said.

“Maybe, since Matt's here, we should eat in the dining room,” Norma said.

“Mom, don't fuss. Matt doesn't care,” Olivia said.

“I'd rather eat in the kitchen,” he said. “It's cozier.”

Norma was still making noises about the dining room as Olivia got Thea settled into a booster chair, but finally the food was on the table and the four of them had taken their seats. Matt grinned when he saw the size of the serving bowl containing the cabbage and noodles.

“You weren't kidding about feeding an army, were you?” he teased Olivia's mother.

She laughed and brushed her hair back from her forehead. “It's ingrained. In our house, growing up, putting a lot of food on the table showed you cared about your family.”

“Actually,” Olivia interjected, “it showed you could afford to
feed
your family. Right, Ma?”

Norma gave her a sheepish smile. “Yes, that's true.”

Matt couldn't help but think about how different his own home had been. He couldn't ever remember a homey scene like this one. All Britton meals had been served in the dining room, and certain dress and behavior were de rigueur.

Just then, Thea hit the table with her spoon. “I'm hungry!” she announced.

They all laughed, and Olivia took her plate and filled it with the noodles. Then she cut up a piece of sausage and transferred half of it to Thea's plate, as well. Thea immediately dug in as the rest of them served themselves.

Matt couldn't remember anything tasting so good. He knew part of his enjoyment had to do with the company he was with, but the food really was great. So was the talk and laughter and genuine love among them. Matt had always known something was missing from his own family, and now he fully understood what it was: the knowledge that these people cared for him more than any other people in the world.

His heart felt full as he looked around the table. Right now, at this moment, he was home.

And home was where he wanted to stay.

Chapter Seven

O
livia knew what she was doing and feeling was crazy but having Matt there with them made her happier than she'd been in a long, long time. It just felt so right, so natural. And she knew she wasn't alone in feeling this way. She could see how much her mother liked him. And, of course, Thea loved him.

And I love him. That's the problem. That's why it's so impossible to stick to any decision that has to do with easing him out of my life.

She had been so uncomfortable in the car today when Matt said those things about Austin. And about her. She'd wanted to say there was only one man who interested her in that way, and that man wasn't Austin. But how could she?

If only things were different.

If only Matt wasn't a Britton.

If only Vivienne was a normal mother-in-law, someone who loved her and wanted her to be happy.

Much of Olivia's happiness faded. Vivienne
wasn't
normal. And Olivia wasn't free to love Matt. To even
hint
at how she felt. Her love would cost him his family. And possibly his career.

Don't ever forget that.

Perhaps her eyes or her expression betrayed her thoughts, because Matt's eyes met hers and he frowned. Olivia made a determined effort to smile and pretend everything was just as good as it had been moments before, but she was afraid she hadn't succeeded, because his eyes remained curious and his own smile seemed strained.

Thank goodness for her mother. Norma stood and said, “Is everyone ready for dessert?”

“Ice cream!” Thea shouted.

“Not ice cream,” Norma said.
“Kolache.”

“Kolache!”
Now Thea laughed happily. “
Kolache
and
ice cream!”

“She's got you there, Mom,” Olivia said. Turning to Matt, she added, “You'll love my mother's
kolache
, Matt. She makes one kind with walnuts. And another kind with apricots. They're both wonderful.”

“And sometimes poppy seed,” Norma said.

He grinned, the strain gone. “I can't wait.”

Olivia got up and began clearing the table. Surprising her, Matt stood, too, and helped.

“Sit, sit,” Norma said. “Our guests don't do kitchen duty.”

“This guest does. I invited myself, remember?” He turned to Thea. “Let's get you cleaned up a bit, princess.”

“You're silly. I'm not a princess.” But she allowed him to wipe her face and hands.

“You're
my
princess,” he said, ruffling her hair.

Thea giggled.

Olivia's heart squeezed at his tender words. He would make a wonderful father because it was easy to see he loved Thea. In fact, he'd shown time and again that he really liked kids, not just Thea. Some men only pretended to, but with Matt it was genuine, and kids responded accordingly. He even helped coach a Little League baseball team and had once said he couldn't wait until he had a son of his own to coach. Yes, he'd make a terrific father.

If only... But she cut the thought off. “Time for dessert,” she said brightly instead.

Minutes later they were all settled around the table again. The adults had fresh coffee with their slices of
kolache
, and Thea happily ate Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla ice cream to go along with hers.

“This is the best
kolache
I've ever had,” Matt declared.

“It's different than what you usually find in Czech communities,” Norma said, “but it's the way my grandmother made it.”

She was referring to the fact she baked long jelly-roll-like pastries, then sliced individual servings. Most Czech bakers made stand-alone fruit
kolaches
, with a well in the middle containing fruit or jam.

“Well, they're wonderful,” Matt said.

Olivia made a determined effort not to let her thoughts stray into dismal territory again, and for the most part, she felt she was successful. After they'd finished their dessert, Olivia and Matt cleaned up the kitchen. He even allowed Olivia to give him an apron.

“I'm not going to be responsible for you ruining that suit,” she said, knowing it was expensive.

“Slave driver.” But he was laughing.

She laughed, too, especially when she saw how cute he looked in the frilly apron. “That suits you.” She pretended to reach for her phone. “I think I need a picture. To post on Facebook.”

“I'll kill you if you take one.” He wielded a wooden spoon as if it were a weapon.

Still laughing, she mock-ducked.

After more silly banter, the kitchen was clean and Norma suggested they go into the living room “where it's more comfortable.”

They passed another pleasant hour talking and watching Thea play with the Lego set Norma kept in a toy box for her beloved granddaughter. But at seven o'clock, Olivia reluctantly said she thought it was time to go. No matter how much she loved this part of the day, it couldn't last forever. “Put the Lego away, sweetie,” she said to Thea.

“I don't want to,” Thea said, pouting.

“Thea,” Olivia said.

Thea's lower lip protruded.

“I mean it.”

With a long-suffering sigh, Thea began to very slowly put each Lego piece in the toy box.

Olivia considered saying something about speeding it up, but didn't. It was enough that Thea was obeying.

“Need some help with that, princess?” Matt said, getting down on the floor with her.

“Matt... “

He looked up, and when his eyes met hers, the rest of what Olivia was going to say died on her lips. There was something undeniable in his eyes, something Olivia knew she was going to have to deal with. The only question was, how? Because here...and now...she knew it wasn't going to be easy to walk away from him, no matter how much she knew it would be the right thing to do.

Why does he have to be so wonderful? And why am I so attracted to the absolute wrong man?

Heart pounding, she looked away and began gathering her things.

Finally they were ready to leave.

At the door, when Norma hugged Olivia goodbye, she whispered, “He would make Thea a wonderful father.”

“Mom!” Olivia whispered back. What if Matt had heard her?

But he hadn't. He'd instead picked up Thea and was allowing her to sit piggyback, which she loved to do. She was giggling and he was pretending to be a horse, complete with neighing sounds as he transported her outside to the car.

All the way home—which was only minutes away—Olivia couldn't get her mother's comment out of her mind. Hadn't she thought the same thing earlier? That Matt
would
make a wonderful father? And he'd probably make an even more wonderful husband.

And lover.

That thought made her breath catch, almost as if she'd said it out loud. She glanced over at Matt, but he wasn't looking at her. Thank God. Even though she'd not voiced that thought aloud, her eyes might have betrayed her.

When they reached her house, she turned to say goodbye to him at the door, but he said, “I'll come in. Help you get Thea ready for bed.”

“You don't have to do that, Matt. I know you have things to—”

“I want to.”

What could she say?
I don't want you to.
That would be a lie because she did want him to. The fact was, she wanted even more. She wanted, after they'd gotten Thea ready for bed and settled her into her room, to take Matt's hand and lead him into the master bedroom. She wanted him to stay the night. She wanted him to undress her and make slow love to her, not once, but several times.

She remembered that old song from the oldies station her mother used to listen to—the one about slow hands.

She swallowed.

Just thinking about what she wanted made her stomach feel hollow.

It had been so long. So very long. She could hardly remember what it had been like to be held, to be loved, and touched, and cherished. She and Mark had been too young, really. Their lovemaking had been fast and impatient, the way young lovers are. Mark had never had the chance to grow with her.

She was so lonely.

Her loneliness hadn't been so bad when Eve was living there, when they'd been in the same boat, but now Eve had found love again. A wonderful, passionate, grown-up love. All you had to do was look at her to see how happy she was. How fulfilled.

I want that, too. I deserve that, don't I?

Why was she torturing herself? She knew what she wanted couldn't happen. That's all her neighbors would need. To see Matt's car in her driveway all night long. The entire gossip network of Crandall Lake would be on overtime tomorrow!

And Vivienne.

She would go ballistic.

Olivia actually shuddered, thinking of it.

“What's the matter?” Matt said. By now they'd settled Thea into her bath and were sitting watching her. “Are you cold?”

Olivia shook her head.

“You sure?”

Olivia tried hard to make her smile genuine. “Yes, I'm sure.” She could feel his eyes on her as she looked away.

After Thea's bath was finished, Olivia dressed her in her pj's and got ready to read her a story. She hoped Thea wouldn't ask for the daddy story tonight, because she wasn't sure she could handle that kind of emotion right now. Not in front of Matt.

But Thea surprised her, saying in her stubborn voice, “I want Unca Matt to read to me, Mommy.”

Olivia looked at Matt, who stood in the doorway.

He smiled. “I'd love to.”

Olivia sat in the rocking chair in the corner while Matt sat next to Thea on her bed and read her
Pigtastic!
, one of her favorite stories. Olivia loved looking at him, loved seeing the way Thea responded. It was clear he was enjoying himself, that none of what he was doing was pretense. No one was that good an actor. With every moment that passed, Olivia realized anew what she would have if she could have Matt.

By the time he'd finished, Thea's eyes were closing. It had been a long, full day, and she was obviously tired.

Olivia got up and went over to the bed. “Say good-night to Uncle Matt, honey.”

“'Nite, Unca Matt.”

“Good night, sweetheart.” He bent over and kissed Thea's cheek.

Then Olivia kissed her daughter, too, saying, “Sweet dreams, pumpkin. I love you.”

“I love you, too, Mommy.”

Olivia turned off the carousel lamp, leaving only the night-light on, and she and Matt where almost out of the room when Thea said, “Unca Matt?”

He stopped, turning to look back at Thea. “Yes, sweetheart?”

“I wish you were my daddy.”

Olivia's startled eyes met his. For a long moment, their gazes held. Then Matt, still looking at Olivia, said, “I wish that too, sweetheart.”

Thea's words and Matt's answer thundered in Olivia's mind as they left Thea's room and walked to the front of the house. Olivia knew she should say something, but she couldn't think of anything. She could barely look at Matt, let alone make conversation.

“I guess I'd better go,” he said.

“Yes,” she murmured.

When they reached the door, he turned to her. “Liv.”

She finally raised her eyes. Her heart felt unsteady.

“I meant what I said. I do wish I was Thea's father. Just as I wish you were...mine.”

Then, shocking her, he drew her into his arms, lowered his head and captured her mouth in a kiss that sent lightning bolts all the way to her toes.

* * *

Knowing he'd stunned her, Matt almost said he was sorry. But he wasn't sorry. And Olivia had responded to his kiss, opening her mouth and allowing him in for long seconds before pushing him away. That had to mean something.

“Matt, we...we can't do this.” Her troubled eyes met his as she backed away from him.

He reached for her, taking her hand. “Why not?”

“You know why not.”

“What I know is, I'm tired of pretending to just be your brother-in-law when I'd like to be so much more. And I think you
want
me to be more.”

“I just... I don't see how you
can
be more. You know how your mother feels about me. She'd go crazy if she thought there was anything between us.”

“That would be
her
problem, wouldn't it?”

“It would also be our problem.”

“Not mine. I don't care what she thinks. Think about it, Olivia. She's going to go crazy when I testify as a character witness for you, so what's the difference?”

“You're planning to be a
character
witness for me?”

“Of course I am.”

“You can't do that, Matt.”

“I can, and I will.”

“But—”

“No buts. I'm doing it. You and Thea are more important to me than anyone else in the world, and I don't care who knows it.”

Olivia sighed shakily. “Knowing that means a lot to me, Matt. But are you sure? Your mother won't sit still for this.”

Matt shrugged. “Let her do her worst.”

“I...” Another shaky sigh. “Matt, you have to give me some time. This is a lot to process.”

“I know it is. I don't expect you to make me any promises. I just wanted you to know how I feel.” He didn't add that he'd wanted to make sure he staked his claim before Austin Crenshaw started working on her.

Their eyes met again, and he could see all the confusion and doubt and fear raging through her. At that moment, he could have cheerfully strangled his mother. This mess was all her doing. If Vivienne was a normal person, with normal feelings, she would want her son's widow to find happiness again. She would
encourage
her. And if that happiness was with her other son, she would be ecstatic. But Vivienne wasn't normal. And, for some reason Matt had been trying to figure out all his life, she didn't have the same feelings for him as she'd had for Mark.