The Love He Craves (The Love She Craves: Selling Her Soul to Declan Book 2) (39 page)

Dr. Patel's phone call came as they left the mountains and foothills behind, just in time to tell them to head to a hospital in Colorado Springs where a med school colleague of one of Lubbock's ophthalmologists practiced. Phone calls had already been made, and everyone was expecting them.

Chapter 36

Nyxie sat in the surgical waiting room feeling a sense of déjà vu. Who could have predicted her honeymoon would lead to a place so similar to the location where Declan had begun taking care of her. She had been nearly unaware of his presence that day when the police and the woman from CPS had come to question her. It felt as if it was her against the world at that moment but he had stepped in and defended her. At that time, she had assumed he was just a kind doctor; she didn’t know they shared any connection.

With the knowledge that he loved her, she felt strong enough to fight off the same fugue state she had been in when Cody had been hit by the car. She could and would stay in the moment. She was not that frightened young woman who had to zone out when reality’s harshness reared up before her.

Shifting slightly in her seat, she felt the twinge of soreness from her earlier punishment. With the surge of longing to be with Declan, Nyxie rocked again to feel the ache and reached for her necklace which bound her to him on a deeper level than her wedding band. Her fingers swept across the notch in her collarbone where it normally rested and she found it missing.

What if that was a sign? Would he think she had taken it off because she didn't want to be his slave? Should she go back to the mountain and look for it?

Only if she wanted to get lost.

Nyxie picked up her purse and headed into the restroom to see if it had become unclasped and had fallen unnoticed into her bra. It hadn't. A panicking sensation settled in the pit of her stomach, knowing there was nothing she could do about it.

If it had been a single toilet bathroom, she might have locked the door and looked at her bottom, so she could see the evidence of his love. Christ, she needed that right now. She knew it was bruised; she could feel it, but she couldn't risk someone else walking in while she had her pants down. Maybe in the days to come, they could laugh over the wayward marks he left—because she was sure she had bruises in places where he would not normally put them.

God, what if he could never see again? No, she wasn't going to think like that. The doctor was certain, barring any infection, that he would keep his eyesight in his left eye. His right? It was too early to tell. Best case scenario, he would most certainly need glasses and follow-up surgeries to remove scar tissue.

Nyxie looked at herself in the mirror. She looked a mess. There was blood on her shirt—especially on her shoulders where he had held on to her as she led him down the mountain. Where her backpack straps had rested, the material was mostly clean. There was a smudge of brownish dried blood on her cheek and although she had washed her hands once already, there was blood around her fingernails. Jeez, no wonder people kept staring at her. She washed everywhere that she could see blood on her skin, took her hair down from its ponytail, finger combing it the best she could and put it back up.

When she finished, she headed into the stall and was surprised to find blood on her panties. At first, she wondered how she had gotten Declan's blood
there
, then she felt stupid. Obviously, she had gotten her period. It had been about a year and a half since she had bled, but she should have realized immediately why the blood was there. She hoped the emergency maxi pad in her purse still had sticky adhesive after all that time. Since Nyxie's mother had disappeared before her period had even started, Nyxie had not had anyone to ask about how to use a tampon. Money had been so tight, she didn't want to waste any on a box if she couldn't figure out how to use them. But she intended to remedy that. Luckily, it was only a small spot of blood and the pad stuck reasonably well.

Christ! Could the day get any worse?

She washed her hands again and exited. She had barely sat down when Declan's parents walked in. The moment she saw them, she burst into tears. She felt so ashamed of herself for hurting their son that she couldn't help it. As it was, she knew they didn't really like her, and now after this, they no doubt despised her.

To her surprise, Roy opened his arms to her and she realized they understood it was an accident.

She stood up and took a tentative step towards them. When Roy didn't drop his arms, she closed the distance. She may not have particularly liked them, nor they her, but she was thankful to have them with her. She hated herself for not being stronger. She should be. Never in her life had she had anyone to stand with her until Declan.

But now she could unite with her in-laws in their love for the man on the operating table.

Roy’s cologne triggered a flood of memories and she felt herself pulling away from him and brushing her tears from her cheeks. She grabbed several tissues from a box on a nearby table before she returned to her seat and her in-laws sat in the chairs across from her.

"Thank you for letting us know," Dorothea said. "Declan wouldn't have told us until we saw him next."

Nyxie nodded. "You got here quickly. Did you get a direct flight?"

"It's been six hours since you texted. We had to catch a connecting flight in Dallas."

She couldn't begin to guess how much that had cost them, but she doubted it was cheap. She wondered if they had booked a return flight or if, God forbid, they intended to return with them in the RV. Her kids, the nanny, now his parents, her period, and a trip to the hospital. Some honeymoon.

Behind her, a phone rang. It wasn’t her ringtone so her brain barely acknowledged the sound.

"Your purse is ringing."

Nyxie turned and as soon as she realized it was indeed coming from her bag, she hadn’t recognized it as Declan’s ringtone. Because she wanted to answer it before it stopped, she barely glanced at the display. There was no name, but the number had the 806 area code from home.

"Hello?" she said.

The voice seemed to hesitate. Was it an old flame of his? Maybe she should have just let it go to voicemail.

"May I speak to Declan Stryker?"

It was a male voice, thank goodness.

"Uh, he's not here right now. May I take a message?"

"This is Dr. Hastings. I run the fellowship program at the Garrison Center at Texas Tech. Do you know if Dr. Stryker has accepted a fellowship?"

Nyxie automatically sat up straight, her eyebrows lifting with surprise. "No sir, he hasn't."

"One of the candidates to whom we offered a fellowship has accepted an offer elsewhere. Dr. Stryker is next on the list."

Nyxie wanted to jump for joy. This was exactly what he wanted. "He's going to be so thrilled."

"When are you expecting him back?"

"Um.” How much should she tell him? Would he rescind his offer if he knew Declan could lose sight in one eye?

"We are in Colorado on our honeymoon. He had a small accident and he's in surgery right now."

"Oh."

Not the most articulate answer, but it conveyed his surprise. She waited, hoping he would not automatically withdraw the fellowship.

"When does the job start?" she asked and wondered if
job
was the right term. God, she hoped she didn't mess this up for him.

"May I ask…?"

"He had a rock fall on him. They are repairing a cornea laceration."

"Corneal," he corrected.

Nyxie felt her cheeks heat up. He probably thought she was an idiot. "Corneal laceration. Right."

"Have him call me at this number in the morning with his decision."

"Yes, sir. I'm sure he'll say yes."

As she hung up Declan's phone, Nyxie found a reason to smile for the first time in many hours. There was always a part of her that felt as if bad luck followed her around, infecting those around her, that somehow, Declan didn't get the position because of her. But maybe that wasn't true. God, what if he couldn't accept the job because of his injuries? If he was blind in one eye, he might have to decline the fellowship. If that happened, it was unlikely they would offer again if he reapplied.

Nyxie bit her lip and turned to his parents. "Tech’s Geriatric program offered Declan a fellowship."

"Does that mean you'll get to stay in Lubbock?" Major asked.

She nodded. It never occurred to Nyxie that they might have had to move elsewhere if he hadn't. She wondered if CPS would have been able to remove the kids from their home again or if they would have informed the local child welfare agency wherever they went.

She also wondered if he intended to stay in Lubbock after he completed the program. Despite whatever turmoil there was with his family, she suspected Declan preferred to live within visiting range of his folks. She doubted he would want to set up his practice in Chimera Flats. That was just too close. Or at least she hoped so.

Awkward silence filled the gap between Nyxie and his parents, and Nyxie cast her eyes to her hands, rather than continue to look anywhere but at his parents sitting directly in front of her. Roy picked up a magazine and began thumbing through it.

"How has your trip been?" Dorothea asked and seemed truly interested if the way she made eye contact was any indication.

"We've been having a lot of fun. None of us has travelled before, so it's been amazing."

Dorothea’s eye brows strained against the Botox to lift. "You brought your brother and nieces on your honeymoon?"

"Yes, ma'am. Kylie took the kids horseback riding while we went climbing in the mountains. Luckily, Declan had given her a credit card so they can get a room and anything else they need. I imagine we will meet back up as soon as they release him and we’ll head home. When we called them to tell them we would not be back today, we said the RV had broken down."

Nyxie felt as if she had been rambling, telling his mother more than she really wanted to share, hoping she didn’t give his mother any information to use against her later. She suspected, given the chance, his mother would try to break up her marriage to their son. The only thing she could do was show them Declan had her full support and she would care for him to the best of her ability.

Thankfully, before she could say anything more, a surgical nurse entered the waiting room and approached her.

"He's out of surgery. Everything went well. He's in recovery and awake if you want to see him."

A sense of relief washed over Nyxie. Not only had the man who had become her world come through his operation safely, but now she would have a buffer between his parents and her. After they had seen for themselves he would recover, they could go find a hotel for the night. Hopefully, they would catch a flight home first thing in the morning.

Nyxie brought up the rear as the nurse led them into the recovery room where they found Declan with both eyes covered with perforated aluminum patches and gauze. The head of the bed was raised so he could sit up comfortably and he was holding a magazine upside down, pretending to read it.

His bruised and swollen eyebrow bore four ugly black stitches and he wore a bandage on his nose much like those she had seen in People Magazine on celebrities after a nose job.

"Stop acting like a clown," Major said, pulling the Cosmo from his hands.

"Mom? Where's Nyxie?"

"I'm here," she said putting her hand on his ankle so he would know where she stood.

"Are you okay?" he asked her.

"You're the one who had surgery," Dorothea said. "How are you?"

"Mom, I told you that you didn't need to come. I guess Nyxie and I won't be playing Blind Man's Bluff now that you’re here."

Nyxie giggled. "That's okay. I don't know how to play that."

"We can make up our own rules and I'm pretty sure it will involve getting nekkid."

Roy chuckled. "Yep, the boy seems fine to me."

Nyxie's cheeks felt like they were on fire with embarrassment that he would say such a thing in front of his parents.

"When will you know if your vision is going to be okay?" Coach asked.

"Nyxie didn't tell you?"

"They just arrived a little bit ago."

"My left eye is fine,” he said, intentionally pointing at his left ear. “They only patched that eye to force me to rest it. They had the debris out of it in the ER. Barring infection, the right should heal just fine. I may have to have follow-up surgeries and I may have diminished vision, but glasses should correct that."

"That sounds like pretty good news."

"Yes, as I said, you really didn't have to come," he said exhaustively. "But I'm glad you did.”

Chapter 37

"Hello," said one of the two young female orderlies wearing teal scrubs. "We're here to wheel you down to your room. May I check your bracelet?"

"My name is Oedipus," he said, making a joke to explain his eye patches.

Nyxie tried to suppress a laugh.

The young woman with the tablet looked confused as she tried to figure out why she had a different name listed.

"Oh, I know who you are, the other orderly said. "You're the patient who gouged his eyes out and now we need to take you to the psych ward."

The first one cluelessly tried to figure out who he was. Finally, she checked his bracelet. "Declan Stryker. That's the name I have. Is he supposed to go to psych? I show he's to go to the third floor."

"He's teasing you," the second transportation orderly said. "But it might serve him right to get locked up for keeping us from doing our job."

Within a few minutes, Declan settled into a small private room.

"What time is it?" Declan asked.

"Almost 7:00."

"No wonder I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since breakfast. I bet I already missed the dinner tray. Have you eaten anything while you were waiting, Nyxie?"

Nyxie reached out and took a hold of his hand, surprised that even in his current state, he was thinking about her. "No, I didn't even think about food."

"Mom, Dad, would you go down to the cafeteria and get us some food? We'd be happy with a burger or a sandwich, something I can eat with my hands, so I don't have to stab my face with a fork or feel like a two-year-old being fed."

"I'm sure Nyxie would like to come with us and pick out her own food."

"Dorothea, Declan wants a few minutes alone with his wife," Roy said perceptively.

"Oh." Dorothea looked between her son and Nyxie. "Is that what you want to eat also, Nyxie?”

"Do you think they have pasta? I'd really like some lasagna or spaghetti with a salad and something chocolate for dessert – pudding or cake, something like that."

Nyxie noticed Declan's lips tighten. He had been ordering all of her meals while they had been on vacation and suspected he would have liked her to go along with his request. She knew Declan never normally ate burgers. In all the time they had been together, he had never ordered a hamburger or fries, which was fine with her. She'd eaten burgers at least once a week since she started working at the truck stop. Although it was one of the best meals on the diner's menu, she was tired of them and never really cared if she ate another one anytime soon.

"Are they gone?"

Duh, he couldn't see that they were gone, she should have told him. "Yes, we’re alone."

Declan pulled on the hand he was holding, drawing her forward. He puckered his lips and waited for her mouth to meet his. Relief washed over her as she sensed he had forgiven her for her carelessness, and she gave into all the wonderful, tingly sensations that his kiss brought to the surface. He hummed slightly in satisfaction as she drew away, ending the kiss.

"You didn't answer my question. How are you?"

"Better now that you're out of surgery."

His fingers tightened around her icy cold hand. "Better? Does that mean you zoned out on me again?"

She shook her head but realized he couldn't see the movement. "No, just a lot of crying… And a little rocking. I kind of broke down for a minute when your folks arrived."

"But you're better now?"

"Yeah.” Her eyes and sinuses prickled as tears formed. "Mostly."

He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed the back of her fingers. He turned her hand over, straightened her fingers and kissed her palm. Before withdrawing her hand, she caressed his whisker-stubbled cheek.

"You looked annoyed when I asked for pasta. I probably should have told you, I crave carbs, nitrates and chocolate when I'm on my period."

"Your –?" He laughed. "Our little girl has become a woman at last."

"Shut up!" she said, tamping down a smile.

"Oh well, I guess for all intents and purposes, the honeymoon was pretty much over."

"Do you mind marking it on my calendar app that you got your period today?"

She should've known that he would want to track her menstrual cycle since he wanted her to have their first child right away.

As she pulled out his phone, she suddenly remembered the call that had come in just before they had been allowed to see him.

"Oh my gosh, I almost forgot," she said excitedly. "A man from the Garrison center called. They wanted to know if you had accepted a fellowship elsewhere. Someone turned them down and you were next on the list. He asked you to call him back with your answer in the morning."

"Was it Dr. Hastings?"

"Yes."

Declan took a big sigh which Nyxie could only assume was relief.

"Do long hours start again?"

"Honestly, I don't know. But I wouldn't be surprised."

A wide smile crossed his face and she couldn't help but join him. "I'm glad I got to be the one to tell you. I just wish I could see your eyes light up."

He outstretched his hand toward her, accidentally hitting the bed rail, making him wince slightly.

Nyxie lowered the rail, sat down next to his hip and took his hand in hers, holding it against her body between her breasts. She leaned forward and kissed him. The instant their lips met, all seemed right with the world. Nyxie no longer worried that he was angry with her for hurting him. She could feel the forgiveness in his kiss. She felt his love and knew their bond transcended the mishap.

His lips moved gently against hers, evoking breathless tingles from her breasts to her core. Releasing his hand, Nyxie leaned forward, carefully placing her palms on either side of his body, as she maneuvered onto all fours on the bed.

She wanted to ask him if he still loved her but even in her mind, the question rang of her pathetic insecurity. He couldn't know that being so unloved her whole life made every ounce of his love and affection the manna she needed to sustain her. His free hand wove into her hair at the base of her skull and fisted, pulling her hair in that slightly painful way that showed his dominance, and made her girlfriend clench with desire. When his hand opened and splayed, he pulled her closer, grinding their mouths together. His hand controlled the movement of her head as his tongue invaded her mouth.

She didn't know if he intended the kiss to feel punishing or if his mouth was fucking hers as a substitute for the contact that would probably get them arrested if a nurse walked in on them having sex.

Nyxie knew not to meet his probing tongue thrust for thrust, but instead stroked his tongue as it withdrew—an invitation to stay.

After a few minutes, she realized her arms were beginning to shake with fatigue and she lowered her body over his. She could feel his raging erection through the bedding and his groan reflected her own frustration. Through the covers, she firmly stroked him with her hand.

His fist tightened in her hair again, this time pulling her away. "God, I know we should stop. Anyone could walk through the door," he said breathing hard. "Suck it. Blow me, Nyxie. Blow me fast and hard and swallow every drop."

"What? But…."

"Now. Show me your obedience."

Nyxie climbed off the bed and moved her body between the apex of his legs and the door. If she heard it opening, she could stand up immediately, giving her a split second to raise the blanket to cover him.

Taking a deep breath, she un-tented his swollen cock. The massive appendage bounced up as the blanket and sheet came off and she moved aside the ugly hospital gown.

Her fist surrounded the shaft as she guided the head into her mouth and began to pump with her hand and bobbed up and down, swallowing the air in her mouth to cause suction. She started off slowly, allowing her saliva to coat the delicate skin.

"Harder, faster," he urged.

Her grip tightened and she began twisting as her hand pumped and her mouth rode up and down. His glans hit her throat, and she fought to mentally overcome her gag reflex.

He moaned and his hips began thrusting in rhythm with her motion, suddenly stilling as he exploded. She milked every last drop into her eager mouth. He shuddered repeatedly afterwards as she licked the head of his dick, making sure she swallowed every bit of his salty essence.

"Go get a washcloth and clean me up and wash your hands."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."

"You did well. I'm proud of you," he said, reaching blindly in her direction. She didn't see him because she had already turned to the sink. He dropped his hand and covered up with the hospital gown until she came to wash him.

"Thank you."

Nyxie beamed at the praise and washed her hands as the water began to warm and then took a washcloth and wetted it before returning to his side and lovingly cleaned his half-erect cock. He took the washcloth from her and finished washing.

"Was I doing it wrong?"

"No," he said gruffly. "You were going to make me get hard again."

Nyxie smiled to herself and covered him back up when he was finished.

She sat back on the bed and leaned forward until her head was resting on his chest.

"Sir. I need to go back to the mountain."

"I'm not sure I could find that particular mountain again. Why do you want to go back there?"

"My necklace is missing. It must've come off when we were coming down the slope."

He sighed. "I'll get you a new one."

"Are you mad?" she asked again, hating herself for feeling needy.

"No, baby."

Chapter 38

Nyxie sat down in the chair in the corner of his hospital room and opened the foam container to see what they had gotten for her. Steam carried the aroma of marinara sauce from her mozzarella topped baked ziti, garlic toast, salad and Italian style green beans. A see-thru plastic container with a thick, gooey, frosted walnut brownie sat within easy reach for dessert. She fought to free a fork from its packaging while his parents visited and fussed over Declan. And he ate a rather unappetizing burger while he told them about their trip so far. Her hands were shaking with hunger as she lifted her first bite. It only took about a quarter of the meal before the edginess she was feeling began to dissipate.

She consumed as much as she could eat and set the rest aside, planning to take it with her to the RV and save it for a meal the next day. It was just not her nature to let good food go to waste.

At nine o'clock precisely, Roy announced they needed to go find a room for the night. Their body clocks were still on Central time.

"Dad," Declan said, shaking his head. "We've got the RV in the parking lot. It sleeps at least eight."

Nyxie's head jerked up, and if he could have seen her, he would have found her staring at him dumbfounded.

"Uh, yeah," Nyxie said, hoping his parents hadn't seen the flash of uncertainty she felt. They had all been attempting to get along and not purposefully try to antagonize each other, but she had no desire to spend any more time with them than necessary, much less alone with them without Declan to draw their attention. "Yeah, you can have the bedroom. I'll sleep on the sofa."

They all said their good-nights to Declan, Nyxie’s quite subdued, before she led her in-laws to the far end of the parking lot where three other RVs were parked. They passed the Strykers' rental car where they retrieved a pair of small rolling suitcases. A man sat in a lawn chair next to an old Winnebago.

"Are you my new neighbors?" he asked.

Coach quickly introduced them all as he reached out and shook the man's hand. How easily being friendly to a stranger came to them. Had Nyxie been alone, she probably would have ducked her head and walked right by, hoping not to draw the man’s notice.

"Do you need any help with the hookups?"

"I can get them," Nyxie said.

"I'll get them," Roy said, squaring his shoulders as if Nyxie had insulted his masculinity. “You go in; I'll take care of this."

Nyxie unlocked the door and led Dorothea into the RV. She put her leftovers in the fridge and turned to find Major sitting on the sofa next to Declan's belt. He had left it there earlier, after using it to punish her. It was all Nyxie could see, as if it was a guilty reminder, not only of her transgression, but also of their lifestyle.

"Uh, make yourself at home," she said, not knowing what else to say. "I'll go get our things out of the bedroom so you can put your suitcases away."

Nyxie snagged the belt off the sofa and headed into the bedroom. She pushed the door closed so she could get to the closet hidden behind the door—an awkward design of the RV.

With a tug, she pulled the suitcase out of the closet, laid it open on the bed and began pulling her clothes off the hangers, folding them and putting them in her luggage. Catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror that hung on the back of the bedroom door, she realized she still wore blood-covered clothing.